Monsters & Guardians

by Kay Elle Parker

  Fergus had always criticized, and so had Malachi. Cabhan sometimes joined in, but Dubhlainn and Quinn had often rallied behind Finn and taken some of the hits. The eldest protecting the youngest from words that should have ripped holes in his developing self-esteem. That did just that.

  He’d looked up to his older brothers then, seen them as the way forward in life. He had no wish to be bloodthirsty and ruthless like his father or the pack, like Cabhan and Malachi. He just didn’t have those instincts deeply enough ingrained. Honestly, he didn’t want to be in possession of them—he’d rather be ridiculed for the rest of his life for being a timid wolf than be renowned for brutality.

  Turning off the taps, he checked the steaming water and found it a handful of degrees from being too hot. It would soak into Raine’s tired and aching muscles, give her some relief. Pleased, he went back into the bedroom and inclined his head at Quinn.

  “Okay, sweetheart, time to go with Finn.” Quinn kissed her hair, her forehead as she stirred. He lifted her, soothing her whimpers of distress as he slipped free, and Finn was there to gather her in his arms a second later, his heart pounding when she curled into him. “Nice to have a kitten instead of a tiger.”

  Finn held her tight. “We’ll never tame the tiger, Quinn. It’s who she is, and she’ll need it. Just be grateful she’s forgiven us enough to set it aside for the time being.” He sighed and murmured, “If she can forgive us, maybe there’s hope for us to exonerate ourselves.”

  He carried her to the waiting bath, cradling her gently as he climbed into water that felt like silk thanks to the bubble bath. Lowering them both in, he held his breath as heat enveloped him, then had to restrain his armful as she writhed and cried out. “I know it stings, little one, I know it does. It’ll feel good in a minute, I promise.”

  Fingernails dug into his skin, miniature scythes that seemed to hook into his flesh like demon claws as she tried to clamber out of the water. But he sat, pulling her with him and cuddling her until the tension seeped from her on a long, grateful moan.

  “You suck,” she muttered.

  “Water needed to be hot to relax your muscles,” Finn retorted. He settled her between his thighs so her lower back pressed against his groin and her spine leaned against his chest. He folded his arms over her chest, one above her breasts, one below, so she felt secure. His chin rested on her shoulder lightly. “How do you feel?”

  She sighed, her hands splashing listlessly in the water, scooping up bubbles and letting them fall. “I think Dubhlainn broke my ass.”

  “He broke it?”

  “I’ve never done...that,” she said quietly and splashed some more. Color rose up her breasts, her chest, signaling her embarrassment. “He’s big, and it...”

  “Little one, you were a virgin when we found you,” he said gently. “It was pretty much a given you hadn’t had anal sex before. Did Dubhlainn hurt you? Are you in pain?”

  A random, mortified giggle escaped her and was swiftly silenced by her hand clapping over her mouth. “No, I...he did, at first. Pain and pressure, so full, but then Quinn was talking dirty and it felt...right. Naughty. Filthy. Perfect.” She slid deeper under the surface as though that could hide her from the truth of what she’d felt, then hissed when hot water lapped over her wounds. “Dubh was so rough but all I could feel were sparks of pleasure lighting me up from inside, and then Quinn was inside me too and everything...fuck, everything turned white. Bright, beautiful white where orgasms found me in the light.”

  Finn shifted as his cock stirred. Perhaps Dubh had been right in pushing for the trio to take her at the same time if it brought her this kind of peace. She was accepting of what had transpired, reliving the moments she could remember with an innocent sense of wonder.

  Reaching for the body wash, Finn lathered a sponge and began to wash her as she spoke, using slow, gentle movements so he didn’t disturb the thread of conversation she wove. The key to keeping her, he realized, was listening to her. Whether it was the incoherent ramblings of a woman thoroughly sated, or the intense rantings of a woman controlled by a bridle of fury, they needed to listen to what she told them.

  “Were you okay with that? With both of them inside you?”

  Her body vibrated with a shiver. “It was intense, I guess. Trapped between heat and muscle, it was...overwhelming.” She hummed contentedly when the sponge passed over her breastbone, beneath her breasts, with Finn’s fingers trailing along behind. “But it was different from...before.”

  “Different how?”

  Her feet moved restlessly, disturbing both water and bubbles. “They were different. Dubhlainn and Quinn. It felt as though...” Her voice trailed away, became little more than a whisper. “As though they cared. I wasn’t scared, Finn. I didn’t want to fight because they made me feel like I didn’t need to. Does that sound stupid?”

  No, he thought with fresh hope, it sounded bloody beautiful. He chuckled into her hair, washing her with sure strokes. A weight was off his shoulders. “Not at all, Raine. It sounds like my idiot brothers finally did something right.”

  She laughed softly. “They did something.” Her head thumped back onto his chest and she stared up at the ceiling through half-closed eyes as Finn resumed bathing her. “Am I supposed to be this tired, Finn? Is something wrong with me?”

  “Nothing’s wrong with you, little one,” he assured her, sweeping the sponge down her arm. He glanced up as a shadow loomed in the doorway, felt his heart kick with relief at the sight of Dubhlainn standing there. The Alpha gave him a brief nod, then slipped away silently. “You’re safe and warm and loved. It’s been a hard week for you, full of stress and physical exertion, and you’ve eaten little more than a bird.” Not to mention the likelihood of tiny lives fluttering into existence inside her. “Quinn’s going to feed you when we’re done here, and then we’re all taking ourselves back to bed for some rest.”

  “Sounds good,” she whispered.

  He cleaned every inch of her until the water cooled, talking to her with enthusiasm about anything and everything he could think of—life with the pack, life with his brothers, snippets of memories—even though she barely offered a response. Just adorable little grunts, shakes of her head, purring sighs.

  By the time he lifted her from the tub, Quinn waiting silently with a towel, Raine was already long past conversation and far into the realm of dreams.

  Chapter Sixteen

  Raine

  Two Weeks Later

  Stress ate her insides like acid. It was a horrible sensation, one that had been growing for over a week. Strangely, it didn’t have anything to do with the three big brutes she was coming to love as mates; they’d been nothing but attentive since the day she’d taken all three of them.

  They fed her on an almost ridiculous timetable, making sure something was always under her nose should she feel like eating—sandwiches from Quinn, platters of finely cooked meats from Finn, and Dubhlainn seemed to be in charge of the dessert department. He’d discovered her love of chocolate and made it his mission to ply her with it whenever the craving struck.

  Between the three of them, she was bathed every day, her body worshipped under the water until she wondered if she’d been a water deity in a previous life. Every inch of her was washed, pampered, slathered in cream that kept her soft and supple, sensitive to the brush of their hands and mouths.

  Because, of course, they put both to good use, and often.

  Her nights were spent in the big bed, spooned by Dubhlainn with his cock pressed against her ass, and cuddled in front by Quinn. More often than not, she scissored her legs so Finn could sleep in the vee, his head resting on her inner thigh. And she was always woken with a mouth on hers, teasing her fully awake, before her wolves reclaimed her.

  Falling in love with them had been easy once she stopped fighting every move they made. If they did something nice for her, she thanked them and showed her genuine appreciation instead of sniping at them with attitude. If she reciprocated, her mon
sters were all too eager to let her know how grateful they were.

  Three very different men focused entirely on her happiness was something she couldn’t quite get used to. Dubhlainn was undoubtedly an Alpha down to the bones—dominant, sometimes arrogant, constantly aware of everything going on around him, yet he had a well of compassion she hadn’t successfully reached the bottom of.

  Quinn was strong, physically and mentally, but Raine learned quickly that he harbored a great deal of guilt beneath the façade. He stood beside his brother with pride, assessing life with a calm and focused eye. Consent had become a large part of the sexual relationship when it came to Quinn and Raine; he always asked, and she always granted permission. It gave them both a sense of comfort.

  Finn was growing into himself. She’d learned a lot about his childhood, the hell that was a pack when a pup didn’t fit in as it should. His father’s tormenting, the actions of his brothers, the judgement of the other wolves. Her heart broke a little for the young boy he’d been, full of optimism and the need to care for things other than himself. He was smart, and dedicated to her every whim, yet always deferred to his older brothers, giving them respect.

  They were beginning to adapt to life as a group of four, and Raine made things easier by acknowledging her role as packmate. She hated the term bitch and had snapped several times when they’d forgotten themselves and mentioned breeding. She struggled with the notion of being forever labelled as nothing but a broodmare for them, and they went out of their way to reassure her she was their pride and joy, their entire existence.

  One day, she hoped she might truly believe the earnest words.

  Settling into life with them didn’t mean she’d lost her fire. On the contrary, it burned just as high and hot as it had before, she was just controlling it more responsibly. There’d been the morning when Dubh accidentally knotted her ass, locking her to him for damn near three hours, and her control had cracked so completely both Dubh and Quinn had been forced to shift to heal the wounds she ripped into their flesh.

  That had not been a good morning.

  However this feeling inside her was not anger or frustration. It was a fierce and determined emotion, but not one of negativity. It confused her even as it scared the sweet bejesus from her soul.

  Raine was terrified it signaled the start of her second estrus, the fucking heat that caused her so much pain and fear only a few short weeks ago. She didn’t think she could survive another week of that, couldn’t give up the three doting wolves she depended on in favor of the rutting beasts.

  She loved her monsters, she did, but it was her guardians she trusted.

  The marking bites had healed, leaving her with scars on both her shoulders and her wrist; she couldn’t face the bruises and bites and scratches that came from the rougher side of this existence. Not so soon after last time.

  Squished between the two radiators she called Quinn and Dubh, she tossed and turned as they slept. Finn grabbed one of her legs, stroked it in his sleep as though he knew she was restless. And suddenly, horribly, she felt too confined, tangled in a web of hormones she couldn’t escape, couldn’t hide from, while she lounged in the lair of the monsters.

  Quickly, quietly, trying not to disturb the sleeping wolves, Raine managed to sneak out of the bed. Her body pulsed and throbbed, bringing a sob to her throat. This couldn’t be happening. She risked a glance at the bed, expecting to see her lovers waking with black eyes and tenuous control, but they continued to sleep.

  Standing in the chilly air, the warmth of her companions fading from her skin, she was torn as to what to do, where to go. Her hands dropped to her belly, to the heaviness settling in her womb like a rock and whimpered fitfully to herself.

  Part of her wanted to crawl into her nest—the nest she hadn’t been near since she made it—and the other part protested, warning her she’d be pinned in there, unable to escape, when the wolves came hunting for their mate.

  She stepped from side to side, riddled with uncertainty. Dancing in place as her mind spun in circles, confusion and yearning melding into one vicious poison. Almost weeping, she felt her knees start to tremble.

  Strong arms wrapped around her in the dark, big hands covering hers over her stomach, and she shuddered into the heat pouring into her from behind. A chin propped on her shoulder carefully as the scent of Quinn surrounded her, grounded her. He growled softly, almost inaudibly so only the lowest notes resonated into her and stole the rest of her fear. “Shush now, sweetheart. What’s wrong?”

  “I don’t know.” Couldn’t he tell her? Surely he had to know what this horrible feeling meant? “I don’t know what’s wrong with me.”

  “Breathe, Raine. I’ve got you.” He turned her into his arms, gathered her up so she could wrap her legs around his waist while he rocked her. “Tell me everything. You’ve been off color for a bit.”

  “I’m coming back into heat,” she blurted, unable to stop the sob from following on heel of those five disastrous words. She felt his body jerk, then his growling intensified, all but forcing the calm into her body. “I can’t go through that again, Quinn. I’m not strong enough to endure it a second time.”

  He sighed, kissed the tears she didn’t know were coursing down her cheeks, and then her quivering lips. “Sweet, terrified girl,” he murmured softly. “You’re not coming into heat, sweetheart. Even if you were, it would be nothing—nothing—like the first time, I promise you.”

  “Then what’s wrong with me?” she wailed plaintively. “Why do I feel like this?”

  “Because, precious,” Dubhlainn’s voice, low and sleepy, came from behind her a moment before his arms joined Quinn’s around her, securing her in an embrace of devotion, “you’re pregnant. The restlessness, the emotional upheaval? All normal, Raine. Your body’s acknowledging the presence of pups and wants to prepare itself. Everything’s fine, precious.”

  Okay, she hadn’t considered that possibility. Estrus or pregnant, which was the greater of the two evils? She wasn’t ready for children, never mind pups, and the thought of life developing inside her, half her and half...one of her lovers, was a frightening thought. Carrying the next generation of a bloodline of wolf shifters was probably a huge responsibility, right?

  She realized her hands were still on her belly, right where her children were sleeping, and yanked them away as though her flesh burned. That subconscious gesture was something she wasn’t going to dwell on. Instead she pressed her hands to Quinn’s bare chest and shoved.

  His grip tightened.

  “Brother, let her go. Give her some space to think.” Dubh stepped away as he spoke, giving her room as she slid down Quinn’s body and staggered back a step. “We’re here, Raine. We’re not leaving, you’re not on your own. Take some deep breaths and let it sink in.”

  Sink in? Sink in? She ran a trembling hand over her face. “You’re sure?”

  From the bed, Finn yawned loudly. “Chemical signatures for pregnancy have a completely different pheromone structure to that of estrus. While your scent has been altering subtly, more so over the last week, it’s not pumping out the right chemical balance for estrus, but it is consistent with what I remember of conception and fetal development.”

  Raine blinked at him, lost among the big words. She blinked again, winced against the light as the bedside lamp flicked on, and bit her lower lip as Finn rose to join his brothers. “H-How many pups are we talking about here? Hypothetically?”

  Finn tilted his head. “Multiple births—twins, triplets, quartets—tend to be rare. It’s thought there are several factors involved, nature included, but it’s strongly believed that twins or more can be conceived through manifold mating.”

  “English, please, Finn.”

  He looked sheepish. “Taking several knots within quick succession, usually within a day. The shorter the time frame, the higher the possibility. What with Quinn tying with you almost immediately after Dubhlainn, and then me not long after...” He gave her an apologetic smile that d
idn’t do much to assuage her nerves. “Chances are fairly high of a litter of more than one pup.”

  She blew out a long breath. “Okay, so we’re talking pups. They’re what, this big?” She held her palms a few inches apart, estimating the size of what she thought a pup would be. Then she eyed Dubh. Quinn. Finn. She edged her hands out a few more inches. “That’s okay, I can deal with two of those.”

  The sympathy in Quinn’s gaze twisted her stomach into a pretzel. “Sweetheart—”

  “No! No, don’t you sweetheart me, Quinn!”

  Dubhlainn sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. “Wolf shifter pups are born in shifter form, precious, but they aren’t exactly—”

  Her knees gave way at the confirmation. Stunned, Raine dropped to the carpet and sat in shock as her wolves rushed to surround her. She wanted to slap away the caring hands but couldn’t muster the energy. Shifter babies. Not that she’d had much contact with kids under the age of four or five, but she remembered one of the women in the community giving birth to a baby boy who had measured in at twenty-one inches and weighed eight pounds, seven ounces. The woman’s labor had lasted all day and well into the night, the camp full of her wails and moans and screams.

  Raine felt all the blood leave her face.

  Surely pups wouldn’t weigh that much, or be that long, right? They would be cute, fluffy balls of fur that just popped out of her vagina with little effort from her and no screaming involved. Then she looked up at her lovers again and swallowed hard; there was every chance she’d give birth to monstrously-sized furry warriors prepared to claw their way out of her womb.

  “She’s in shock,” Finn said urgently. “Dubh, get her back into bed and keep her warm. I’ll go get her something warm and sweet to drink.”