The Laughing Gods

by Wilbur Arron

  I watched the single rider approach. He was on a desert pony. They were smaller than the riding and cavalry horses of the polis, but faster and nimbler. What I noticed was his uniform. He dressed in pants, padded shirt, and a wide hat, only these were pale blue. The Zilar used the same style uniform, but theirs was desert yellow. He carried the same bow, sword, shield, and spear as the Zilar did. I wondered why he was different. I had charged my crystal from the other realms. I was ready to cast force to act as a shield, and then cast a lightning bolt to turn him to dust. I know he saw me but did not lower his spear. He stopped maybe twenty paces away from me.

  “Greetings,” he called out. It was passable Greek with a heavy western accent like Philie. “I am Gyras of Syrinnia, servant of Mistress Zila.”

  That was proper enough. “I am Alexio Sopholus, Mage and Protector of this Forest,” I replied, keeping my hands in plain sight. “What brings you here?”

  “I have heard of you,” he said with a slight bow. “My mistress sent me to find you. My mistress wishes to have a meeting with you to discuss the situation about the Zilar horde in Argina.”

  That seems odd. “I see,” I said. “You will forgive me when I say your uniform is like the one of the Zilar horde. The last three times they came to this forest, they were not interested in talking.”

  “I know,” Gyras said sadly. “I saw their remains along the road at the edge of the forest. My mistress is not part of the Zilar horde. She is estranged from her father, Zilar. Those that follow her are also not part of the horde. That is why we wear different uniforms.”

  “What does she want to talk about?” I wanted to know.

  “That, my mistress did not tell me,” Gyras said. “All she told me was that she wants to meet with you.”

  “Where?” I asked.

  “We are now living in the remains of Dysiasty,” he said. “She would like to meet you there.”

  He was insane to think I would go there. “If she wants to meet, it will be here. Otherwise, I am not interested. If she comes here, she can bring an escort of five riders into the forest. How many she lets camp outside the forest is up to her. Those are my terms.”

  “My mistress will not be happy with that,” he said coolly. “She will guarantee your safety if you come to Dysiasty.”

  Her word meant nothing to me. Staying alive was my priority. “Tell her I was not happy the last three times her father and brother sent troops in here. I do not know her, and I do not know you. I do not trust my life to vague promises.”

  Gyras just nodded his head and smiled. “I understand; I will take your message back to my mistress. I will return alone with her answer.”

  “Do you want anything else?” I asked

  “No,” Gyras said, obviously finished with me. “This is all my mistress told me to do. My mistress will tell you everything else.”

  So much for any small talk, I thought. “As you wish,” I said and bowed slightly. “I will give you a piece of advice. On your way back, stay on the road until you leave the forest. There are creatures in these woods you do not want to meet.”

  Gyras nodded and turned his horse around. “I have heard about them, and I could feel someone watching me. I will take your advice, Mage Sopholus.”

  As he rode away, I saw him looking at the scorch marks I had burned into the road the last time a Zilar scouting party came to threaten us. He seemed to be measuring them. I watched until he was out of sight and then motioned for Melina to join me.

  “I never expected that,” she said.

  “Indeed,” I answered. I concentrated and called to Aetos,

  “Watch to see he leaves the forest and let me know which way he goes,” I called out.

  “I hear,” the big eagle replied instantly.

  “Why did you not call us?” Kypos asked.

  “For one person, I did not think it was worth your trouble,” I said to him and the others. “If they come back with more, I will call on all of you. Something does not sound right here. I want to know more about this Zila.”

  “Now, as for us, we have a rice field to finish planting,” I said to Melina. We both removed most of our clothing and worked the rest of the day putting in rice plantings.

  Gyras stayed on the road, riding straight back to Dysiasty. That part of his story was true. After finishing our planting efforts, both Melina and I took a few days off. Melina spent the time weaving on a small loom her brother had purchased for her. I spent time reading through Malcor’s scrolls again, trying to pick up more details on the use of magik.

  It was in the evening, several days later, that Keros and Kerina told me they were coming to my house. Both Melina and I met them at the gate. Melina really loved both of the unicorns and often rode them through the forest.

  “Alex, three people just came through the secret entrance from the palace,” Kerina said. “I was able to see two clearly: it was Philie and Iolaos. The other I think was the old man, who came here before, after you and the Old Ones destroyed the men who were trying to burn down the forest.”

  “That would be Xanphos,” I said aloud so Melina could understand me. “I have been expecting them. They probably left at night through the secret exit to keep from being seen.”

  Keros told me, “Lycos and Lykina are leading them here. They will be here shortly.”

  “Then we need to prepare the house for guests,” I realized. “Excuse us,” I said, and we went to prepare some food and wine. Keros was right; we were barely done when all three arrived.

  I was happy to see Philie, Iolaos, and Xanphos the ethnarch’s senior polemarch. I walked up and shook Xanphos’ hand firmly.

  “I am glad to see you, I have news that I would like you to hear,” I told them.

  “Sorry about the hour,” Iolaos apologized, “But people are watching the palace. I think they are waiting for you to show up, or they could just be spying on Cleon. Either way, we did not want them to know we were coming to see you.”

  “Who are they working for?” Melina asked.

  Xanphos answered, “Some work for Pallas and some work for Diomedes.”

  “You were right,” Philie added. “The ethnarch and his family are determined to keep a close watch on you and us.”

  We all went inside, and I served my guests some not so well-watered wine. Both Iolaos and Xanphos both came in with a backpack full of maps and other documents. We all sat down at the kitchen table and spread out the papers. Xanphos brought me up to date on the Zilar, and I told him about my other visitor.

  There was nothing new on the Zilar. The mountain passes were still not fully cleared, and no one was going to move through them until they were free of snow which had been heavy this winter.

  “I am not worried about the Zilar coming through the North Pass,” I said. “At most, they can send two thousand light troops through that narrow gap. Keeping them supplied will be difficult at best.”

  “No, but they can run rampant in the open plains of the north near Erinia,” Xanphos said, pointing to the eparchia capital on the map. “If they are light troops, they can break down into small groups-making running them down hard.”

  “I would worry more about Aegae on the north coast of Erinia,” I told the old man. “The Zilar can send a major fleet loaded with troops from their base on the north shore. They could set up a base there and use it to supply a larger invasion force.”

  “And we do not have a fleet to stop it,” Xanphos said.

  “Unless you get help from Lantia,” Philie added. “They have a major fleet.”

  “They are also three days sail away,” Xanphos said, shaking his head. “By the time we got a message to them, and they could assemble a fleet, the Zilar would be halfway to Arginnia.”

  “The Lantian fleet could still come in and attack and burn any base they build at Aegae,” I said. “An army does not do well without supplies.”

  “Not unless they can steal food from the stored supplies in the other poleis,” Xanphos replied. “They ar
e still two-thirds full, and the harvest was not bad last fall.”

  I pointed out, “Unlike the light troops, they will likely have siege engines with the invasion force at Aegae. We all know how good they are at using them.”

  The others nodded their heads. The Zilar had taken Dysiasty in two days. The cities in Erinus did not have fortifications much better than those in that polis. With the peace that came a hundred years ago when the vasíleio was unified, polis walls had not been needed nor strengthened.

  “There is only one answer,” Xanphos concluded. “We have to stop them from setting up a major base in the north of the vasíleio. If we stop that, then their invasion is doomed. If we do not, they can march through Erinus. Our best hope, in that case, would be to gather our forces and maybe destroy them south of the Allund River.”

  “What forces do you have here?” I asked.

  “From the cities in Erinus, about three thousand infantry and two hundred cavalry,” Xanphos said. “They are mostly militia and not hardened troops. I will soon have one thousand troops from the ethnarch. They are all experienced troops. Within a month, I can have ten thousand more militia troops here and maybe a thousand heavy cavalry.”

  “That should be enough to handle them,” Iolaos said.

  “Yes, but the Zilar most likely know that from that traitor Lycus,” I reminded them. “They will have made plans for that.”

  “That part is what frightens me,” Xanphos said. “They may know what our forces are, but we do not know theirs. That can lead to disaster.”

  “Well, I do not think they will tell us their plans,” Philie said.

  “No, but we have prepared the best we can,” Xanphos muttered. “The rest is in the hands of the gods.”

  I was dubious that the gods cared one way or the other what happened to us. I had made other plans for any invaders. For now, I did not want the ethnarch or his two sons to know about them.

  That settled then. “Let us hope Diomedes is up to the task,” Iolaos said.

  Xanphos looked up at me. “We may need your help with this.”

  I expected the question and had my answer ready. “With both the ethnarch and the new arch-mage possibly looking for my blood,” I told them bluntly. “I would be dead as soon as the last Zilar died.”

  “I do not think so,” Xanphos said. “The ethnarch is starting to understand what he did with you was a mistake. I know Pallas still hates your guts, but he will listen to others. The new arch-mage has said nothing bad about you. In fact, all he did so far was send Arch-Mage Herion off on a ship back to the Mage Academy. The archiereas does not seem to care one way or the other. I think you will be safe.”

  I shook my head, no. “I am sorry, Xanphos, but I do not trust them any more than I trust this Lady Zila.”

  Xanphos took a deep breath, his face filled with displeasure. “Suit yourself, Alex, but I think you are wrong.”

  “And when Pallas becomes ethnarch, it will be worse,” I added. “No, thank you. I will help around here if needed, but if I leave this forest, I would not give you a tetartemorion* (small coin) for my safety.

  “You think this Lady Zila can help?” Philie asked.

  “I have no idea,” I had to admit. “This could be a real offer of help, or it could be an elaborate plot to get rid of me. The Zilar hate me more than the ethnarch.”

  “For good reason, considering how many times you have spoiled their plans!” Xanphos said. “You need to be very careful around her.”

  “I fully intend to with the help of my friends,” I said and smiled.

  We went on talking for most of the night. Finally, the late hour and wine caught up with us, and we all went to bed. Nothing more could be done. I put Xanphos and Iolaos in the spare bedroom and Philie and Melina in the main bedroom. I slept on one of the dining couches. Early the next morning, we all had a light breakfast before they left, returning the way they came.

  They were not gone long when Lykina called to me. “Two men are sneaking through the forest near the outer farms,” she reported. “They are searching for something. They move quietly and are dressed like the leaves. They do stink. I think even the squirrels smell them.”

  “Have Philie and the others reached the secret entrance yet?”

  “No,” her voice answered in my head.

  I instructed her carefully. “Go to Philie and tell her to meet me in the big clearing. Make sure Iolaos and Xanphos get back to the palace.”

  “I will do that,” Lykina said.

  I turned to Melina and told her what was happening. She quickly changed into leather armor and took her bow, two knives, and a quiver of arrows. I changed out of my robe into forest green and took the Speaking Stone and several throwing knives. Off we went to the large clearing. We got there just as Philie rode Kypos into the clearing with Kerina right behind them. Sitting on top of that boar, she would frighten anyone out of their wits.

  “You look like a mounted Athena,” I said.

  She ignored me. “Do you know who they are?” the large Amazon asked as she slid off the back of the large boar.

  “No,” I said.

  Philie put her hand on Kypos. “Thank you, my friend,” she told him and then hugged his large head. The boar, who could swallow her in one mouthful, just rubbed her side as if he were a puppy looking for affection. Philie got along with all my animal friends and can speak and hear them as long as she can touch them.

  “Lycos, where are they?” I called out loud.

  The growling voice called back in my head. “They are in the forest. They will soon pass between the large clearing and the road.”

  The five of us moved off into the forest and traveled as quietly as we could through the dense tree growth. In this part of the forest, the large trees grew closer together, so their canopies formed an interlocking covering that kept most of the light from reaching the ground. That meant no sunlight for other plants, so there was no undergrowth, only a thick layer of leaves decaying from earlier seasons. It did not take long for us to move close to where they were.

  “Lykina was right, I can smell them from here,” Kerina said.

  “Do not kill them,” I told the others aloud. “I want to ask them some questions.”

  Lycos spoke up. “I can hear Kypos and Kerina moving through the leaves. Stop there. They will walk right into you.”

  All of us stopped and waited. Lycos was right, I did not hear them approach, but the two boars followed every move the two made, their ears, eyes, and noses were better than mine at tracking. The three of us got down and waited. Just as Lycos said, I saw two moving shadows come closer. They stopped and looked around, keeping low to the ground. They also looked to have no idea we were here. Philie, Melina, and I all hid behind large trees and waited for them to come by. The two boars stood behind us. As soon as they were close, I called out.

  “Nice day for a walk.”

  Both men froze, and suddenly both came out with knives—as if that would do them any good. One of them had the bright idea to run.

  “Knock them down, but do not kill them,” I called to Lycos and the others. Suddenly, there came the sound of the crushing of leaves by a huge weight. The figure of a large dog leaped out of the forest and hit the running man, knocking him senseless. Kypos charged forward at the other man, who just had time to get a good look at a boar twice normal size before it slammed into him. He joined his friend, sprawled on the forest floor.

  “Bring them over here,” I told Lycos and Kypos, who dragged each by a foot and leg before laying them next to each other. I walked up and touched their foreheads. They were unconscious, a little bruised and battered, but mostly unhurt. I concentrated and pulled some diffused power out of the realms and used Life Magik to bring them around. Once they started to stir, I pulled back and stood away from them.

  They awoke slowly, and as they stood up, they noticed what surrounded them: two huge boars, the biggest wolves they ever saw, two women pointing arrows at them, and a small person holdin
g some throwing knives. They hugged each other by instinct and looked at us in fear. I thought one of them would lose control of his bowels.

  “I know these two,” Philie said. “They are two of the people I have seen watching the palace. They are not from Korpolis.”

  “Thank you,” I said and then looked at them. “You are both spies, do not deny it. You are both spying in my forest, which I do not allow. You will now tell me who you are and who you are spying for.”

  They may have been scared out of their minds, but neither one uttered a sound.

  “Lycos, talk to them, please?” I asked.

  There was a deep, loud growl, and Lycos came within three paces and started to bark loudly. At that distance, his open mouth was like looking into the gateway to Hades. The barking made my ears ring at nearly twenty paces. It must have been deafening to the two spies. One of them emptied his bowels right on the spot, and the other fell to his knees, whimpering.

  “Get up!” Philie ordered. Her voice was almost as loud as Lycos. “You were asked a question; answer it now before we lose our patience with you.”

  The one on his knees slowly got up and looked at us. His partner was staring at a wolf’s mouth so close he could touch the teeth.

  “I am waiting,” I called out.

  “I… I… I am Cycnus,” the taller one stuttered. “This is Stentor, my cousin. We are bo—both from Prianus.”

  That was a minor port on the east coast of Argina.

  “Who hired you to watch us?” Philie asked.

  “Krateros hired us,” the taller said.

  “I do not know Krateros,” I said. “Who is he?”

  “He works for Pallas,” the other said, finding his voice. “He helps Pallas hire men to spy on others. He takes information from the spies and makes reports to Pallas.”

  I looked at both Melina and Philie. Neither knew the name. “Very well, now what are you doing here?” I asked.

  “We came to see if Xanphos was meeting Alexio Sopholus. We were to follow them, but we never saw them. Melanthios, our leader, told us they had left the palace by the secret door. He told us where to find it, but we never saw them.”