Real Vampires: Glory Does Vegas

by Bartlett, Gerry

  “Red, I think. If you can’t get the shorts on over that ass, we can always pull out some black ones. But you’ll look cuter in the set.” She pushed me into a curtained alcove. “Try them on. I have to talk to this good-looking fella here.” She leaned down and put her lips on Valdez’s nose. “Who’s my big boy? Hmm? Oh, you are just the sweetest thing, aren’t you?” She carried on in that way, making love to Valdez until I wanted to gag.

  “I need the black shorts.” I stuck my hand out of the curtains.

  “Let me see!” Mae threw back the curtains. “Top looks good.” She frowned at my hips. “Yeah, you should lose a few pounds, honey. But here’s the black ones. They’ll still be snug. You want my special cabbage soup recipe? Guaranteed to help you drop ten pounds in a month.”

  Valdez raised an eyebrow. He smirked as he looked at me in my sad bikini panties.

  “Thanks, Mae, but these hips are here to stay. Trust me, I’ve tried everything.” I glared at Valdez. He knew he wasn’t supposed to be looking at me undressed. Then again, if I ended up topless, he’d see a lot more of me. I knew he reported to Jeremiah. How? Who knew? I guess he could leave him messages on his phone during the day, hitting speed dial on my phone with his paw. Whatever, I refused money from my former lover, so it’s not like I cared what he thought. Right?

  Misty came by to check on me. She had on a sequined outfit that left little to the imagination below the waist. She carried her plumed headdress in front of her, trying to shield her bare breasts.

  “Mae taking care of you, Gloria?” She flushed when Mae jerked the headdress out of her hands and looked her over.

  “You know I am. How you holding up, girl? You think I don’t know you’re shy?” Mae picked up a makeup kit and went to work airbrushing base across Misty’s perfect breasts. “Here. Think of this as your costume. You are wearing a layer of tan number 9. See how it makes your tits shine? I sprinkle some stardust on you.” She added some glitter with a brush. “So pretty. The men fall out of their chairs. They’ll want pictures with you. Forty bucks a shot. You get half. Big money coming your way. You’ll see.” She grinned. “Feel better yet?”

  “Thanks, Mae.” Misty started to hug the wardrobe mistress. But Mae put up her hands.

  “No hugs. You’ll ruin the look. It has to dry. Now run along. Manny has a new routine for you girls. He sent a couple of guys to paper the strip with flyers this afternoon. I expect a good crowd. Knock ̕em dead, girlfriend.” Mae grinned and shooed her out of the room.

  “I’m fine, by the way. Thanks for the job!” I shouted this after Misty as she hurried out of the room, her five-inch heels making her hips sway. I’d have fallen on my ass.

  “Oh, I have her headdress.” Mae hurried after her.

  “You can close your mouth now.” I admonished Valdez. It didn’t take a mind reader to see he hadn’t taken his eyes off of Misty since she’d walked into the room. Once she’d exposed her breasts? Valdez is a guy. Enough said.

  “I’m in love.” He sighed and put his head on his paws.

  “Right.” I went back into the dressing room, squeezed into size fourteen short shorts that cut into my ass. Then I realized there were rows of high heels I was supposed to wear. Oh, no. At least at the pancake house we’d been allowed to keep on our own sneakers. My choice here was a modest four-inch heel. I crammed my foot into a pair my size and sighed. Some genius, and I gave credit to Mae, had lined the shoes with insoles. They were bearable.

  “Come on out. We’ve got customers. Let me go over the way we do checks here.” Mae was a drill sergeant when it came to money and how to take orders. Luckily, I’d done this kind of work before and we were through with the training in record time. Because the place was filling up. I picked up a tray and moved into the showroom, ready for action.

  Hours later, I cursed those four-inch demons from hell. My feet ached, my back ached and my face hurt from fake smiling for all those hours. I’d thought my former boss was handsy? Wearing a tiny top and shorts that let my ass hang out invited creepy comments and stupid tricks like moving an empty glass farther away so I’d have to lean in to pick it up. Then there was the long look down my top. I’d snatched quite a few twenties out of my cleavages after that trick. What could I do about it? Laugh it off. What else?

  It was a good thing Valdez was locked in the break room. He’d chafed at it, but had no choice. He knew I needed to work for a living and he wasn’t allowed to shift into human form to protect me. The deal I made with him was that I’d call for him, mentally, if I needed him. Since that seemed to satisfy the terms of his contract, he stayed put. We tested whether he could hear me from the showroom. Once he was sure he could, he settled down. The showgirls loved him. He wasn’t unhappy back there with bare-breasted women playing with his floppy ears.

  Manny was on the sidelines, watching my every move. I was the new girl. If I didn’t make the customers happy, I’d be gone. I knew that, so I kept the orders straight, slapped away hands with good humor, and kept my temper when one guy decided that Blondie should come home with him. At that, Manny moved in. He wasn’t just window dressing. He had two giant bouncers who took the drunk out of there.

  “You’re doing fine. Keep it up.” He looked me over. “Bill’s right. Nice jugs. Show’s about to start. Make sure everyone’s got a full drink before the curtain comes up.” He strolled away, hands in his pocket.

  I tried not to notice the way his trousers hugged his taut butt. How long since I’d had a boyfriend? A year, two? Time flew when you weren’t having fun, but just trying to make a living. I had to admit Manny was my type, tall, dark and masculine in a take-charge kind of way. No, not happening, Misty had seen him first. But then Sid walked in and took a spot at the bar. Too bad my roomie seemed to like her men brutal and thuggish.

  In a few minutes the lights went down except for a few spots on the floor that helped me wend my way through the tables to deliver a few more drinks. The show was about to start. My heart went out to Misty. I know how nervous she was about performing topless. When Manny jumped on the stage and took the microphone, I swear my heart pounded as hard as if it was me about to perform.

  “Ladies and…” He peered at the darkened room. “Hell, there’s no ladies here. Okay, gents, the show’s about to start. We’ve got some beautiful women about to perform for you. After the show, they’ll circulate among you. Want a picture, just ask. For a price, our professional photographer will take it and you’ll have a great souvenir to take home and show off to the jealous jerks back home. Look but don’t touch. Eat your hearts out, assholes!”

  Loud, pulsating music started and the curtains opened. I gasped when I saw the dozen women in their costumes move to the music. It was beautiful. They stepped together perfectly, balancing their huge headdresses while wearing practically nothing. Oh, yeah, their bodies gleamed from Mae’s body paint and stardust. I saw Misty stumble for a moment. Her eyes widened. She must have seen Sid. She knew he didn’t care if she danced. He’d pushed her to do it. She found her feet and continued to move with the rest of the women, dipping and swaying, their hips making suggestive movements that had the men in the audience leaning forward.

  I was leaning forward too when the dancers turned and you could see their perfect butts in their G-strings. Oh, my, I would never put on a costume like that. I had way too much ass. If only I’d known before Jerry had turned me vampire that I’d be stuck like this forever, I’d have laid off the roast beef and chocolate. Sticky buns! All those treats Jerry had bought for me because he’d found me starving. What had been a kindness had made me gain weight that I now regretted. Which was useless. I was stuck. Mae’s talk of a cabbage soup diet was wasted on me. Vampires don’t change. Believe me, I’ve tried.

  I fingered the tips in my pocket. I’d heard there was a new synthetic blood that was supposed to be dietetic. Very expensive though. Out of my budget. Tomorrow night I might have time to run by the dealer and pick up some. He claimed to have testimonials. I could hear
Valdez laughing about it now.

  I was dreaming about a perfect body like Misty’s when I felt a hand on my ass. I’m an ancient vampire, remember? So can you blame me if my first instinct is kill?

  3

  I took a breath and turned slowly. “Remove your hand or you’re going to be wearing this tray as a hat, bud.” I wasn’t surprised to recognize Sid attached to that hand. I couldn’t miss the cologne he bathed in, even in the dense fog of smoke and testosterone surrounding me.

  He grinned and stepped back. “Relax, Gloria. Just being friendly.” He winked. “Nice to catch you without that damned dog around.”

  “That damned dog has good instincts.” I picked up an empty glass and smiled at a customer. “You’re Misty’s boyfriend, last I checked. You have no business making a move on me.” Sid was still following me, too close.

  “We’re not married or nothing like that. I can hit on anyone I want. You’re hot. Misty says you ain’t seeing anyone. Thought you might be lonely.” Sid slid a finger under my bra strap. “I can fix that.”

  “I’d have to be desperate to hurt my roommate that way.” I faced Sid. “Sorry, but I just can’t take a chance that she’d throw me out. Understand?” I straightened his tie. No way was I making him mad. He wasn’t going away and I didn’t need the drama. I poked him in the stomach a little harder than necessary, smiling when he winced. “Thanks for the offer.” I backed away and ran right into Manny.

  “This creep bothering you? Sid, take a hike.” Manny looked him over. “We don’t comp drinks here. Pay up and go.”

  “It’s okay. I can handle Sid. But thanks, Manny.” I brushed past him and cleared another table, taking another drink order. I glanced back. Sid obviously didn’t like the idea that I’d “handled” him. Too bad. The show was winding down. It hadn’t been very interesting, just a series of bumps and grinds and seductive walks around the stage. As the music came to an end, Manny rushed back up to the stage.

  “Wow, I know that got my juices flowing. How about a hand for the ladies?” He led the loud applause and wolf whistles. “Now they’re going to walk around the showroom and you can buy them a drink or get your picture taken with them. But I mean it—look, don’t touch. I promised my fair ladies you’d respect them. Don’t make me have to get my enforcers in here to put anyone outside.” With that Manny waved his hand and the dancers spread out, stepping carefully off the raised stage in those high, high heels.

  I knew there had been a heavy cover charge, so being escorted out was an effective threat. At least the women moving closer got the drink orders flowing in and I was busy, hurrying to the bar to pick up the special “champagne” the dancers ordered. I knew from Mae’s instructions that it was sparkling cider. She didn’t want her ladies under the influence while they were working. I was pleased to see that Misty was popular and the photographer Manny had hired was busy taking photos and collecting fees for all of the dancers. It seemed like the topless thing was working, until it all went to hell.

  “Lap dances? This ain’t no strip club, asshole.” A red- headed dancer with serious attitude threw her drink in a man’s face and stomped away from him, her jiggling boobs making it clear she was naturally well endowed.

  “Donna, slow your roll.” Manny caught her arm before she got to the door leading to the dressing rooms. “Let the bouncers handle jerks like that.”

  “Let me go, Manny.” She pulled away from him, her headdress falling off and landing on a candle in the middle of one of the tables. Whoosh! It went up in flames. Meantime, the jerk/asshole was shouting that he’d paid for her to have champagne and he could swear it was pure apple juice he was licking off his face.

  Mutters of displeasure went through the room. I happened to know that these guys were being charged twenty bucks a pop for the bubbly. I’d be pissed too if I found out it was cider.

  “Hey, Blondie, get over here and give me change. I ain’t paying for some high dollar drink if that’s what they’re sipping.” The man I’d served before had just handed me a hundred-dollar bill for drinks for himself and Misty.

  “Sure, on my way!” I dug in my fanny pack for change while trying to stay away from the fire. Beautiful ostrich feathers were going up fast. Donna was wailing, clearly afraid she’d have to pay for her headdress. Manny had found a fire extinguisher and was shooting foam at the table, hitting the men who’d been sitting there and making them mad. Why hadn’t they moved?

  “Here’s your change.” I threw it at him then hurried to the bar, dodging hands on the way. Misty followed me. I was relieved Valdez hadn’t heard Sid hassling me. All we needed was an angry dog in the mix.

  “I’ve got to get out of here. It’s one thing to dance, but to walk around here with my boobs on display is just…” She shook her head then snatched a paper napkin off my tray. She tore it in half then stuck one piece on each boob. Apparently Tan Number Nine worked like glue because they didn’t move once they were on there. Misty’s boobs might be awesome, but they were clearly the result of some plastic surgery. They hadn’t wobbled once as she walked.

  “I can’t take another minute of it, Glory. I’ve made a couple of hundred, that’s it for the night.” She saw Sid and hurried to him. After a little conversation she ran toward the dressing rooms, dodging the cleanup crew and Manny, who was trying to soothe the irate customers hit by the mess when he’d put out the fire. Donna followed her, her scorched feather headdress in her hands.

  Manny grabbed the microphone. “Relax, folks. There’s another show in thirty minutes. You like Hawaii? You should see these gals shake their hips to island music wearing nothing but a flower lei. Did I say lay? Now my head is spinning.” Manny nodded to the rest of the women to leave the showroom. “Drinks are half price until the show starts. How’s that for a deal?” He put down the microphone.

  I just stood there. That announcement meant I was going to be busy. My feet were killing me and I exchanged looks with the only other cocktail waitress. Compared to the topless dancers, we were looking like bank clerks in our bra tops, short shorts, and rhinestone covered fanny packs. Didn’t matter. The atmosphere was raunchy and every guy there obviously thought they could play “Grab Ass” with us. It was exhausting.

  The Hula dance was just as boring as the first number. The only difference was the music and the flower leis. No headdresses this time. Also, no Donna or Misty. The women who were left did their best to look seductive as they did a dirty dancing version of a hula. Sad, really. The half price drinks had done the trick though. Drunk customers wanted photos once the dance was over and the dancers made a ton of money posing with them. I even got some requests. I checked with Manny and he made a deal with me to split the money.

  I thought the night would never end. Finally, the last dance was done and the dawn was only a little more than an hour away. I knew I had to get out of there. Thankfully, the customers were leaving once the half-naked women were gone. I counted my money, settled up with the bartender and realized I’d made some really good tips. I headed for the break room and Valdez.

  “Took you long enough.” He got up off the couch and stretched.

  “So sorry if you were bored.” I sat and took off my torture shoes. “Where are my clothes and my tennis shoes? Though I’m tempted to drive home barefoot.” I had already checked. We were alone. Good thing since Valdez was talking out loud.

  “Mae put everything in a locker for you. The key is on a chain hanging around my neck. Isn’t that sweet?” Valdez came closer and let me take the chain. “Lockers are over there.” He pointed with his nose. “I tell you, I saw so many bare breasts tonight, I almost quit looking.” He gave me a doggy grin. “Almost.”

  “I bet it was pure torture, seeing and not being able to do anything about it.” I staggered over to the locker and found my clothes and shoes in a bag. I didn’t have the energy to change, so I just stuffed my aching feet into the tennis shoes.

  “You have no idea.” He followed me to the door. “Mae should have to
ld you more about the job. You have to wear the same thing every night. I heard the other waitress talking to Mae. You need a couple of other tops and shorts or you’re washing every day.”

  “Where am I supposed to get those?” I put my tips in my purse then stuck the empty fanny pack in my new locker. It had a mirror inside. I’d have to be sure no one saw me avoiding it. Typical vampire problem.

  “Mae sells them and they aren’t cheap. Talk to her tomorrow night. She’s gone now. Had to get home to the family. Would you believe she has five kids?” Valdez chuffed. “Her husband took off and she’s the sole support. Now she does stuff like make the costumes. You can get her to sew you some bigger shorts. Not that I looked, of course, but you were walking like you had a stick up your butt.”

  “That’s how it felt. I had a wedgie all night. You really did get all the info, didn’t you?” I slammed and locked the locker then threw the key into my purse. “Let’s go.”

  “Not so fast. Bring the dog and come with me. You haven’t met the big boss yet.” Manny stood in the doorway. If he’d heard Valdez talking, he didn’t show it.

  “Now? My feet are killing me, Manny. I’m desperate for a shower.” I also didn’t look forward to meeting the big boss here when I was dressed like a slut. First impressions…

  “Sorry, but Dominic owns this place and he has to give you his stamp of approval. Mae gave him your paperwork and he has a question about it.” Manny looked me over. “You did okay tonight. Answer his questions and you’ll be fine. I know you got good tips. You don’t want to lose this job, do you?”