Shadow of the Sun

by Laura Kreitzer

CHAPTER 26: TIMELESS

  There was a cold so penetrating I thought I would choke on ice. The scene before me burst into a million tiny wisps of smoke. My body trembled, a little unhinged, as I cried out. I jerked upright, silencing my voice.

  “Abelie,” I breathed. The infinite sadness resonated in my voice as my mind pulsed and churned.

  I took in my surroundings. I was back in her bedroom—not on a battlefield. It felt as if I had just fallen back to reality with a thud.

  There was movement in the darkness, and I jerked away, startled and a little frightened. “It’s just me,” Andrew whispered as he lightly traced a finger down my cheek. A small spark of electricity followed his touch.

  My chest jumped up and down rapidly as I tried to regain my composure. Fear and grief continued to boil in the pit of my stomach. Andrew whispered something, and a lamp in the corner sprang to life. I blinked, trying to adjust my eyes. My back was pressed against the wall, my knees pulled up to my chest. Andrew sat up, the covers over his legs. I looked down at the top of my knees, Abelie’s silk robe barely covering them.

  “Gabriella?” Andrew ran his fingers along my jaw. He had a pained expression on his face with eyebrows knitted together. “Are you . . .” he trailed off when my eyes shot to his face. He examined my expression and must have seen the panic in my eyes. “Oh, Gabriella,” he sighed. “What did you see?”

  My breathing slowed but not my thoughts. They exploded in my mind like a hammer slamming into a mirror. “Your death.”

  “What—”

  “The Ladies of Light,” I cut in. “It was them all along. From your death to the Shadows.” I shook my head. “It was them. Always, it was them.”

  I glanced over Andrew’s shoulder, my sight going unfocused. He cupped my cheeks between his palms so I had to stare at him. His eyes were still a brilliant blue, just as somber as before.

  “Tell me what was in your dream. Please,” he pleaded softly. “Let me help you.”

  I inhaled deeply before speaking. “The Ladies of Light are after me. They’re after the Illuminator.” A blast of realization hit, so hard and rough that it knocked the breath from me. “And now I know why. It’s because I know, because Abelie knows—knew.”

  “I know they attacked us before, but—” I put a hand up to stop him. He needed to know the truth.

  “It’s more than that. I know why Karen, Soul Stalker, didn’t remember the Halo of the Sun. I know why Abelie wasn’t married to Aiden like you remembered and why he’s a Shadow. It all makes sense. I understand. I know why.” I blinked a few times, trying to rid my eyes of the pictures from my dream.

  Names didn’t define good or evil, it was the soul within. The Shadow of the Sun might have caused death, but those full of light altered their minds. I saw it happen. The Ladies of Light wanted the power; they were hungry for it. They turned the Guardians into Shadows. They altered Abelie’s mind. In the dream, I felt what she did, heard what she did. She didn’t remember Aiden when she stared at him after he turned into a Shadow. She felt terror. And in her mind, she didn’t know why she was there or who the Halo of the Sun were.

  Andrew pushed a piece of my hair behind my ear, startling me from my reverie. There was a faint frown line between his eyebrows. “Tell me. I want to know; I want to help,” he begged. “What did you witness? I could sense your feelings while you slept; they were a mixture of emotions. You were angry and irritated, you were afraid, and you grieved. And all I could do was hold you and try to take those feelings away. Please, just let me do that now. Let me be your peace.”

  I nodded slowly. I felt like I could cry again at any second, but I was dry—there were no more tears left in me. Plus, I was tired of crying. The whole concept of tears was still new to me, and I didn’t like them.

  “I saw it all,” I breathed, my voice husky with sleep. “The answer to everything.”

  “Which is?”

  “It’s best if I tell all of you together,” I told him, my voice barely a whisper. “It pertains to you all.”

  He nodded and looked down, deep thought. “I’ll gather everyone.” He peered back up, a look of avid anticipation on his face. “Will you be okay while I . . . ?”

  “I’ll be fine.” I gestured with my hand for him to go. “I’ll meet you down stairs in a few. I just need—”

  “Some time alone.” He stood and grabbed his shirt. He shot me a small half-smile before he bent and kissed me on the forehead. “If you need me . . .”

  “I know where you’ll be.” I attempted a smile.

  He nodded once and opened the door to leave. He hesitated for a second in the threshold, glanced over his shoulder, and shook his head once before exiting.

  Getting up, I tried to shake off the emotions from the dream. When I looked in the mirror, the green of my eyes had faded into that same bright blue as Andrew’s. Automatically, my hand rose to the dark circles under my eyes. I was never going to get a good night’s rest with these dreams. My gaze followed the line of the beautiful silk robe. It was more like a dress. It was beautiful and even more stunning on Abelie, I remembered from one of my dreams. I went straight to her closet and opened it to see more robes just like this one but in different colors. I put my nose to the first one I grabbed and drew in a deep breath. It was her scent—her lovely smell that I would never. . . .

  I pushed the thought aside and closed the closet doors.

  I dashed down the stairs and peeked onto each floor. I wondered what kind of mysteries this place presented. Voices wafted up the stairs, and I started to take them two at a time, eager to reach the bottom.

  On the first floor, I peered through the entryway. At the end of the tunnel of books was Abelie’s body. I made my way warily toward the silhouette, as if I waded through deep water.

  “Let’s go this way,” Andrew whispered in my ear, seemingly out of nowhere. He placed his arm around my waist and pulled me in another direction. “Everyone’s waiting for you.”

  Aiden sat at the head of a long table, the same one we had gathered around the night before. Ehno and Lucia were beside each other on Aiden’s left. Joseph was on his other side, an anxious expression on his face. Andrew and I sat beside Joseph as everyone turned toward me, all of them nervously waiting for me to speak. I was uneasy too. I stared at Aiden, trying to look past the charcoal-like skin, the fiery eyes, the lava-filled cracks of his skin. It was hard to believe he was a Halo, a part of the elite.

  “Aiden, how long have you been a Shadow? Where did Shadows even come from?” If the Ladies of Light altered the Shadows’ minds, I wondered what they did to blanket their time of being angels instead of Shadows.

  Aiden appeared confused by my questions. “I’ve always been a Shadow,” he stated. “If there was a life before this, I don’t remember it. Rumors are we’re from hell, cast out of light to forever be tortured in shadow. Of course, I can’t remember any time in hell.” He snorted and rolled his eyes.

  “That’s because it’s a lie,” I told him with a straight face, straight to the point.

  The fire in his eyes brightened. “I don’t unders—”

  “You’re the leader of the Halos.” I said it in present tense because I knew, no matter what, he was still a leader, one of the good guys. “You’ve always protected mankind. You were Abelie’s husband before you were ever a Shadow. That was why you were so attracted to her: you always loved her, long before—”

  “Wait,” Ehno cut me off. “This truly is Aiden?” He pointed at him, eyebrows raised. “The Aiden that reigned over all the Halo of the Sun? But he’s . . . and . . .” His speech faltered.

  “What was the last thing you can remember doing before you woke up on the plane?” I asked Ehno. I had to admit I was curious.

  Ehno’s expression hardened.

  Nothing made sense. If Andrew, Ehno, and Lucia were all “murdered” when I saw their deaths, then they would have known about the Ladies of Light. In my dream they knew of their plans and were prepared
to stop them. No, something was undoubtedly off. It hit me then, like a bright light bulb had turned on over my head. A consequence of being turned into a human was the loss of memory. I knew that first hand. But then how did they know anything about the angel world? And how had I been able to see the things that I had through Abelie’s memory if her mind was altered? Was it because the lie had not been planted deeply enough? My head began to hurt from trying to jam the puzzle pieces together.

  “Andrew, Aiden, and I were working with the newly trained Guardians, explaining what their assignments were,” Ehno conveyed. “Zola had informed us only days before that there would be a fire in Istanbul that would destroy ten thousand homes. We wanted Guardians there to help save as many human lives as possible.”

  Andrew nodded in agreement. “I remember. Lucia interrupted to notify us of a meeting the Ladies of Light had requested we attend. Of course, you don’t argue with the Ladies of Light. After that I can’t remember a thing.”

  “It’s true,” Lucia chimed in. “But no matter how hard I try, I can’t remember what the meeting was supposed to be about.”

  I frowned. “I know what it was about.”

  They stared at me eagerly, like I was about to disclose the solution to a mystery. I had no solutions.

  I inhaled a weighty breath before I spoke, as if I was about to say it all in one breath, and explained about the Ladies of Light and their “plans.” As I retold my story, they were frozen in place as the impact of my words hit them.

  There was a spasm in Lucia’s face. “That’s ghastly,” she spat.

  “Intolerable.” Ehno stood, exploding with anger.

  “That’s what you saw in your dream?” Andrew searched my face intently as he rested his hand over mine on the table. “Are you sure?”

  “That’s only the beginning,” I said in my desperation to make them all understand how dire this really was. The dispiriting realization crept up my veins as they grew silent.

  Andrew’s hand tightened over mine, and he broke the silence first. “Of course,” he said in realization. “Your emotions while dreaming . . . you were livid and aggravated, which explains what you told us. Next came . . .” His face paled. “Fear.”

  Ehno lowered into his chair, exchanging a dark look with Andrew and Lucia.

  I barely nodded. “Lucia joined your side; she disagreed with what Liz and Mimi had decided.”

  “Absolutely,” Lucia agreed. “How would I ever let them get as far as they had?” Her voice rose to a shout, and she shot up from her chair just as Ehno had.

  “There was another meeting,” I continued. “Except the Ladies of Light were left out.” I gestured for Lucia to sit down. She did. I leaned toward her. “Lucia, you were there. Everyone had agreed and planned to stop the Ladies of Light before they were able to go through with their hideous plan.”

  Lucia folded her arms and huffed indignantly. “I knew they enjoyed their power more than one should.”

  “Sadly, the Ladies of Light won against the Halos, Guardians, and even you, Lucia.” I stopped, not wanting to go on.

  Ehno took in a deep breath and closed his eyes. “I can see it.”

  Andrew’s eyes snapped to Ehno. It was as if I could see the thoughts crowding behind Andrew’s eyes.

  “That can’t be,” Andrew said in a scandalized voice.

  “What do you see, Ehno?” Lucia asked, placing her hand on his forearm. “Show me.”

  Show her? I watched them curiously as Lucia’s muscles tensed.

  “They came to battle against the Guardians,” Ehno said, his eyes closed as if he were watching the scene in his head. He explained the events I dreamed in grave detail. With each word, his voice rose in fury. “Lucia sacrificed herself in hopes the Ladies would back down.” Ehno’s eyes snapped open and found Lucia’s “They turned you human. Then they killed you.” The words were choked.

  “How is sacrificing yourself an effective strategy?” Joseph asked incredulously. He instantly realized how his words sounded and looked rightly sheepish.

  “I don’t know,” Lucia whispered.

  We were all quiet. Ehno stared at Andrew as if communicating silently. They probably were. Ehno finally spoke, his voice numb with comprehension. “They tried to kill the Halos and Guardians. Instead, they turned them into Shadows.”

  Lucia made a funny noise. When I turned to her, she looked as though someone had just slapped her across the face.

  Ehno’s jaw tightened as he continued with the story that I had witnessed only an hour before, though he had more insight. “The Ladies of Light were frightened when they realized the Guardians and Halos didn’t die—that they were Shadows. They panicked when the Shadows woke from the spell, and that’s why no one remembers. The Ladies of Light altered their minds. All of them—Shadows, Elders, all the angel world.”

  “How can Lucia remember being an angel after being turned into a human?” I asked. “I thought that was a side effect.”

  Aiden spoke up. “Sweetie, she died . . . and then she came back to life. If her body could be restored after such an absolute death, surely her memories could be as well.”

  “It still doesn’t make any sense. Why can’t they remember everything?” My head started to pound.

  Aiden sighed. “I don’t know. I’m sure there’s an explanation, I just don’t have one.”

  I peered around the room at the others. None of them said anything for several painfully long seconds. We were all at a loss for words.

  “We’re in trouble.” Ehno’s lips dipped into a frown. He muttered horrible curses under his breath. Andrew turned his direction and nodded in agreement.

  “I know,” I agreed, snapping them all out of their horror-stricken gazes.

  Ehno’s muttering became more offensive. I ignored him as I watched them struggle to comprehend the truth.

  “You mean . . .” Aiden looked down at his skin, his eyes opening widely, dramatically. Then he got this look in his eyes, as if a light had just turned on in his mind. “I’m not a Shadow, and this is all just a . . . a spell?”

  “Exactly,” I said.

  Aiden looked as if the idea was ludicrous. Then an alarmed expression spread over his face. I could understand—if I hadn’t seen it firsthand I wouldn’t have believed it either. There was nothing but stunned silence after that.

  “So why are we in trouble?” Joseph cut in through the dead air. Many emotions flitted across his face before he settled on looking politely puzzled.

  “Because,” Andrew said, trying to inject a note of common sense, “if the angels’ minds have been altered, then none of them know the truth, not even the Shadows. We’re in this alone; we have no allies. No one would believe that the Ladies are capable of such brutal means. What we know, and what the other angels know, are two entirely different universes.”

  I pulled my hand from under Andrew’s and brushed my fingers against his cheek. Electricity spread from the touch. He turned my direction, and his expression softened.

  “If the Halo of the Sun and the Guardians are Shadows now, then why aren’t humans slaves?” My voice lowered with a determined calm. “Or worse—dead?”

  As if on cue, we turned our gazes upon Aiden for the answer. He was the only one who had been around this whole time.

  He plunged immediately into his story. “The Shadows have prevented angels from going through with their actions because we knew that with humans on their side—even if they were just slaves—the Shadows might be defeated. All we have ever wanted was to be left alone.”

  “What?” I shot up as if fired from a canon. Now I was irate. “You knew all along yet no one ever said anything?”

  “We didn’t know that it was only the Ladies of Light who wanted humans to be their slaves,” he confessed. “We thought it was all the angels. That was how I met Abelie.” His eyes were reminiscent. Sad.

  Pain seared my stomach at her name. I was jealous of all the time he had spent with her when I had no time
at all. Reflexively, my eyes peered over his shoulder toward Abelie’s still form. The image of her death haunted my mind. Her body, motionless and lifeless on the ground, almost overwhelmed me every time my mind replayed the gruesome scene.

  Aiden continued, not noticing my distracted state. “My instructions were to gain access to the Divine Library and find any information that could help us defeat the angels. After spying on Abelie and following her for weeks, I realized she was good, moral. She didn’t want to harm humans. She even loved them.

  “Once I revealed myself to her she was terrified, but for some reason she didn’t back away or cast me out. She just stood there in all of her beautiful glory.” His lips twitched up into a small smile. “I spoke to her, and she listened. That was then I stopped trying to destroy the angels. That was thirty years ago.” He glanced over his shoulder at the silhouette of Abelie’s body under the silken cloth.

  Andrew reached out, took my hand, and pulled me onto my seat. I had forgotten I was standing. “There’s nothing we could have done,” Andrew said softly.

  I knew that, I just didn’t want to believe it. “Why?” I pleaded weakly.

  My eyes never left that silken cloth draped over my mom. Andrew put a finger to my jaw and turned my head to face his. The golden color of his eyes hadn’t returned. His eyes were blue, just like Ehno’s and Lucia’s. Just like mine. For several long seconds he studied my face. He brushed his thumb over my lips.

  “I wish I could make you smile and laugh like before.” Though he continued to hold my face, my eyes darted down, hoping that his words wouldn’t make me dissolve into tears. “Please look at me, Gabriella.” When I did, he appeared more desolate than before. “We couldn’t have saved her—she was gone before any of us could have prevented her death.”

  “I still don’t—”

  “If it was anything else, she would have survived. But that was magic. That spell severed her soul from her body,” he whispered, grief evident on his face.

  My insides churned at his confession—that she was really and truly gone. I jumped and found myself on my feet, like I was a cork exploding from a champagne bottle. All the air had vanished from my lungs. Andrew pulled me back down to the chair again. I bit my lip, trying to will back the tears, but just like earlier, I was dry. He hugged me to his chest.

  “What do we do now?” I asked in a low, anxious whisper. He pulled away and glanced around the table.

  Lucia stood, walked toward the other end of the table, and picked up the book on prophecies. She set it down in front of me, the dust floating up in a cloud at the action. “We find the rest of this prophecy. The Ladies of Light didn’t go through all of this trouble to try and kill you if you weren’t a threat to them.”

  “She’s right,” Aiden added. “We’re in the Divine Library. There’s bound to be something in here that could answer some of our questions—or possibly provide us with answers on how to stop them.” He gave me a desolate smile. “I have a feeling you’re the one who will have the honor of restoring the minds of the angels. You’re my daughter, after all,” he said proudly. “And you’re part Abelie.”

  I couldn’t help it; I smiled for the first time in what felt like a decade.

  “Let’s separate,” Lucia said. “We can cover more ground.”

  “What are we looking for?” Joseph asked.

  “I’m not sure,” Lucia admitted. “But if you find anything that you think could give us answers, grab it. Whatever you find, bring it down here so we can go through it together.”

  Everyone stood and made their way to the stairs. I stayed behind, and Andrew hesitated at the edge of the bookshelves. When I didn’t look up from my death stare at the table, I saw out of my peripheral vision that he had nodded to himself, like he had made some internal decision. Then he turned and glided away.

  When the room became quiet, I scooted my chair back, which grated horribly across the floor. I didn’t bother pushing it back under as I inched toward Abelie. My hand reached out without my permission to remove the silk cloth from her face. I moved it slowly, as if not to wake her—which was silly. Maybe I was just hoping in the back of my mind that she would come back to me. Her eyes were closed; her skin was almost as white as the sheet covering her, though blood had pooled under her skin in some areas. What happened to her was so horrific it was hard to digest. Any happiness I had left was being leeched from me.

  “I didn’t have enough time,” I whispered, afraid speaking loudly would ruin her paradise, because surely that was where she was now. But more than anything, I wanted to get her out of the Divine Library. I wanted to put her to rest. I leaned down to kiss her cold cheek. With much effort, I placed the cloth back over her face. My previously exhausted emotions revived themselves. I closed my eyes and let a single tear escape and trickle down my cheek. In that second, I decided I couldn’t afford to let something like this happen again. I would protect those I loved, no matter the cost to myself.

  I followed the path to the stairs and ascended them, listening to my footsteps echo in the silence. On the third floor, I found the place absent of anyone and began searching through the books. The library was like a large splendid hall full of secrets begging to be uncovered.

  Hours passed, and not a single book jumped out at me. As I walked through the shelves of books between the thirteenth and fourteenth centuries, my mind wandered from one line of the prophecy to the next. Andrew said there was more but not in that book. The pages had been erased. The third floor was full of interesting books and information that I would have normally loved to read, but not today. Not after Abelie, and not after reading that prophecy.

  Every time I thought I had figured something out, there was always that one thing that would come in and pull the rug out from under me, turning my life upside down and backwards. As my fingers drifted between the Italian books, I noticed that I had left trails. It was dusty. And as if to prove my point, I sneezed.

  “Bless you,” murmured Andrew.

  I spun around, startled. He saw the look on my face, the one that was screaming for him to comfort me. He didn’t hesitate. He took two long strides and ate up the space between us. There was just something about his embrace that made me feel whole, like he kept the pieces of me together. His sturdy hands snaked their way around my shoulders, and his warm lips pressed against my hair.

  “We will get through this,” he promised.

  “As long as we’re together,” I whispered against his chest. It felt odd for me to feel so weak when the power was so obviously growing within me. His arms squeezed me tightly, and I was enveloped in his intoxicating scent.

  As we pulled apart, he kept his face mere inches from mine. His warm breath filled the space between us. “I know you’re eager to leave, but I’m worried about what or who will be waiting for us when we unseal the door.”

  He could read my emotions so easily. Abelie deserved to be laid to rest.

  My hands were on his chest, his arms still holding me to him. By the look in his eyes, I could read that he was just as absorbed by our closeness as I was. “We can’t stay here forever,” I agreed in a whisper. “Abelie can’t stay here.”

  “Shh,” he murmured and pulled my hair away from my face with his fingers. His expression was one of torture. “Please don’t cry.”

  I didn’t know I was. Dammit. Stupid tears.

  With great gentleness, he secured my face in his palms. I stopped breathing. My heart thumped against my chest. He hesitated, but I continued to gaze into his sapphire eyes. He wiped the wetness away from my cheeks and moved in closer. So many emotions raged through me at once: desire, passion, and sorrow. He was only an inch away from my face. I closed my eyes, and electricity flowed between us in a comforting current. Every second that passed a new emotion would flit through my body, sending shivers of passion through my veins. I trembled under his touch.

  Finally, the tips of his lips brushed lightly against mine. He pressed against me more earne
stly until our lips moved with each other. And for the first time in my life, I could actually hear his heart hammering in his chest along with mine. This kiss was more passionate than before; it had more meaning. There were deeper emotions—stronger desires. My skin warmed under his eager grip. I embraced him back just as fiercely. He knotted his hands in my hair and pulled me closer to him. We were both breathing heavily, and I parted my lips as he deepened the kiss.

  The fireworks one would look for during a kiss were nothing in comparison to the bright explosions of euphoria I felt. My desire ignited, and I was immediately aware of the blood that had rushed to my cheeks. There was a peculiar sensation in my midriff. My fingers found their way to his hair, and I pulled him even closer to me. It wasn’t possible, but that didn’t mean I didn’t try.

  Andrew must have felt the change in my body because his lips eagerly found their way down my neck as he kissed wildly around my throat. It was in need now. His heart pounded passionately against mine as we clung to each other, my breath rough.

  We were approaching a precarious level. He continued to push my restraint to the limits. Normally I would have pulled away, demanded a breather. But I didn’t. We fit together so perfectly, like puzzle pieces. And as cheesy as it sounded, it was true. He was my angel, and I was his. In that second, all I could think about was how I had to have him—all of him. We were destined to be together—there was no other explanation for my intense feelings. I didn’t know how I knew, but I did.

  My arms encircled his neck as I lifted myself up and wrapped my legs around his waist. All of my exercise in self-control was slowly losing ground, but it just felt right. He pulled away and stared at me with a look of hunger in his eyes. He searched my gaze for several seconds as his chest rose and fell rapidly with each of his breaths.

  “I’m sorry, Ella,” he breathed with a look of pure adoration on his face. “I got carried away.”

  I shook my head. My heart leapt at my name coming from his mouth. Though I’d been called Ella in the past, it never seemed right, but on his tongue, in his rich accent, it was perfect. He was perfect.

  “We won’t go farther,” he barely whispered. His face was so close to mine, and I was ravenous. I had to have him.

  “Of course not,” I said breathlessly and brought his lips firmly to mine. And though his kisses were the best things I had ever tasted, I needed more. I deliberated kissing him fully, deeply, but then knew what the consequences of such an indulgence would be. I’d lose control; I knew I would. And I didn’t want that to happen here, amidst the dusty shelves in the library.

  I broke away from his mouth and kissed the line of his jaw up to his ear and then down his neck. A low growl rumbled in his chest, and he pushed me against the bookshelf. A book toppled down, and Andrew reached out and caught it. Before he tossed it to the ground, I caught the title of the book: Timeless. Though the title wasn’t what I had been looking for, something told me we needed to open it.

  “Wait,” I barely choked out. “I think we need to read that.”