by Clare Lydon
When Rachel pressed herself into me, I cried out, pushing myself up to her, wanting all she could give.
I was dizzy and unbalanced, and as I gripped her shoulder and spread my legs as wide as I could, I never wanted to be anything else.
Our kisses grew more urgent as I began to shake; Rachel’s fingers and mouth were everywhere.
She found my clit and I squeezed my eyes tight shut, my breathing ragged; she found my g-spot and I groaned anew.
She adjusted her rhythm to my body’s response, and she was everything I expected: a skilled, sensitive lover.
As her fingers rocked me I arched into her, excitement streaking through me like a thunderbolt. And as she brought me to a taut crescendo, to the peak of pleasure, I cried out, a sobbing writhing mass under her as she slid her fingers deep one last time and I came in a series of intense spasms that racked my body, leaving me exhilarated and washed out all in one move.
I sunk my head into my pillow, speechless, shaking. I was a mass of frazzled nerves, on hyper-alert.
Never had I looked into the eyes of my lover unable to speak, my body going through such extreme pleasure it was as if I could fly.
For the first time, I wasn’t trying when it came to sex: I just was.
And all the while, Rachel still had her shorts on.
As if reading my thoughts, she gave me a kiss — more sensations raining down on me — and a wink. Then she stood up and slowly, deliberately, undid her top button, lowered her zip, licked her lips — holy fucking hell — and slid her jeans down her slim, toned legs, closely followed by her black boy shorts with white waistband.
Tanya had been right. I was already more of a lesbian than I ever thought possible.
I could feel myself getting wet all over again.
I cocked a finger in Rachel’s direction, beckoning her in. “Come here, you love goddess,” I said, trying to arrange my limbs in the most alluring position possible, but when I saw the lust in Rachel’s eyes, I knew I didn’t need to worry.
It was the same hunger I’d seen when we were filming weeks ago, although now, it was ramped up to the max.
“Are you okay? I know this is new for you.” Her face spelt concern.
“Was it okay?” I let out a strangled groan as I eyed Rachel’s grin. “It was like nothing I’ve ever experienced before.”
“I’m honoured to be your first.” Rachel crawled over me on her hands and knees, lowering herself gently on top of me, naked.
I groaned again, and she laughed, kissing my eyelids, my nose, then my lips.
The storm of emotions currently crashing over my body were too much to handle, and it was all her fault.
“You were… magnificent.” I shook my head. “Amazing.” I kissed her again. “Incredible. But I knew you would be.” Another kiss.
Rachel nuzzled my neck, embarrassed, wriggling out of the spotlight.
“But I do have one complaint.”
She lifted her head, raising a worried eyebrow. “You do?”
I pulled her close as an aftershock streaked through me: our skin on skin contact was off the charts.
“Uh-huh,” I said, spinning our positions before she could protest. “I haven’t touched you yet.”
Desire rumbled through me as I raked my gaze down her body. I shook my head. “And you’re just as gorgeous as I thought you’d be.” I ran a hand over her breasts, down her stomach, briefly going between her legs before bringing it back to her lips.
Rachel shuddered, closing her eyes.
That was all the encouragement I needed.
I wanted to devour her, taste her, make love with her, just as she’d done with me.
I was still nervous, but I was also emboldened.
Because now I’d experienced it, I knew this was something I could get used to, a feeling I was already craving again.
As if sensing my internal dialogue, Rachel took my cheek in her hand and held me with her gaze. “Just do whatever feels right — you can’t get it wrong, trust me.”
I nodded, grateful for her words.
I licked Rachel’s soft neck, her broad shoulders I’d admired earlier, her firm stomach. I shook as I took her nipples in my mouth again, hearing her groan. Before long, my fingers were skating through her trimmed, coarse hair, and there was a hitch in Rachel’s breathing as I stopped, flicking my gaze up to her.
She seemed to understand, as she drew me down for a searing kiss. Then she took my hand and placed it on her heat, closing her eyes and letting out a low moan as she guided my fingers to just where she wanted them.
And as soon as I was there, I took over, as if I’d known how to do this all my life.
Making Rachel squirm this way was a whole new level of incredible, as if today hadn’t already gone far enough. But with every kiss I left on her skin, with every twist of my hand, with every stroke to her body, I was reaching a peak I thought I’d already hit, the delicious climb taking me higher and higher, until I could hardly breathe, think, or feel.
And moments later, when I kissed Rachel’s breasts and slid my fingers around her pulsing clit, she came all over my fingers. Her groan was my new favourite sound, her smell my new favourite aroma.
She came again, then again, before she stopped me, holding my arm in place, pulling me to her, kissing my lips.
I didn’t want to stop, not now I’d found something so me, something I was instantly good at.
Something and someone I was instantly lost in.
I’d expected to feel different when I came, but making Rachel come? It was a whole new level of sublime.
Moments later, a slow grin spread across her face and she regarded me with hooded eyes. She was just as punch drunk as me.
“Was that… okay?” I had no gauge on this, I’d just gone with my instincts.
Rachel let out a throaty laugh before she replied. “It was pretty much perfect.” She paused, her eyes holding mine. “How was it for you?”
“I don’t have the words,” I replied, kissing her lips. I crawled up her, and we both groaned as our bodies locked together once again.
I’d told Sabrina I wanted something that took my breath away.
I was pretty sure I’d found it.
Chapter 23
The following morning, after waking me up with her head between my legs and having me for breakfast — another new experience and one I wondered if we could repeat daily — Rachel insisted on getting up and cooking the paella from the night before.
“We’ve got all the ingredients, and I know you’re hungry. At least, I know I am, and you worked just as hard as me.” She placed a kiss on my mouth and gave me a grin as she spoke. I could smell myself on her lips, and I found it a turn-on; with Jake, I’d always cringed a little. What had changed? The person kissing me. Another revelation in my ever-growing bundle marked ‘new’.
I pouted, content to stay in bed with Rachel naked, rather than eat food. However, as if on cue my stomach rumbled, and I could no longer deny I was hungry. After all, I hadn’t eaten for nearly 24 hours, seeing as it was now 10am.
I ran my hand down Rachel’s strong arm, still impressed with her toned physique, honed by hours of work in the kitchen. “What time did Sophie say they’d be back? I feel like there’s still plenty of you I haven’t run my fingers over.”
Rachel kissed my lips again, her breath hot. “I think you gave it a good go last night.”
“I can’t help it,” I said, purring as I spoke. “I can’t get enough of you.”
“I’m not going anywhere, and we have to eat.” She swung her legs out of the bed, before standing naked before me, arms in the air, yawning. Her breasts were perfect handfuls, her hair artfully messy. “If you get up, I promise you can feel me up while I’m cooking, okay? It’ll be the opposite of when we film. You can let your hands roam wherever they want.”
Lately, every time we’d filmed, I’d wanted to press her up against the stove and do all manner of inappropriate things, so I was completely dow
n with that. I nodded, grinning her way. “You’ve sold me.”
I paused, remembering what we still had to do, my ardour suddenly cooled. “Talking of filming — you get chopping, I’ll try to get in touch with Jake, okay?” I frowned as I finished, putting two fingers to my temple.
Rachel nodded, slipping her denim shorts from last night back on, along with her bra, before bringing her head inches from mine, capturing my attention completely. “Good luck, stay calm. And remember: you’ve done nothing wrong.”
It didn’t feel that way, though. And I had to sort it out before Jake watched the recording. “I know.”
Rachel trailed her tongue along her lip. “Don’t be too long, though. I need your lips close to me today.” She paused, her stare making my breath hitch. “Both pairs.”
My insides tightened at her words and I nodded, letting go a breath as she left the room, watching her denim-clad arse all the way.
The woman was so sexy, I was weak.
Dealing with Jake right now was the last thing I wanted, but it needed to be done. I grabbed my phone, my body still wobbling,
It went straight to voicemail. Dammit, where the hell was he? I left another message for him to call me, sent him another text, then dropped my phone on the bed covers, sighing.
I wanted to get this done and move on, as I was doing in all other areas of my life. Until I’d spoken to him, I felt like I was lying, and I needed closure. Plus, it wasn’t just about me: it would do Jake good, too. Knowing the truth might finally free him as well.
When I got out to the kitchen a few minutes later, having got dressed, brushed my teeth and made myself presentable, Rachel was in full flow, onions and garlic already sizzling in the pan. I was sad I’d missed her professional chopping — I was always transfixed.
When she heard my footsteps, she looked up, clocking my face. “Still no luck?”
I shook my head, walking over to her and wrapping my arms around her waist.
Rachel leaned back into me, still stirring the onions with her right hand.
I kissed the side of her neck before replying, surprising myself at how effortless this was. I was slipping into the morning-after just as easily as the night before.
“No. Where the hell is he? Or maybe he’s watched it and he doesn’t want to speak to me.” I winced. “I wouldn’t blame him.”
Rachel stroked my hand with her own. “I guess we’ll find out soon enough.”
“I guess we will,” I replied, kissing her neck again. “Damn, you smell so good. That’s another thing I have to get used to with women, isn’t it? I’m used to smelling better.”
Rachel grinned at me. “If that’s the only downside, I hope it’s one you can manage.”
I smiled. I couldn’t think of many downsides to being with Rachel this morning. Before this had happened, all I’d felt was guilt: for leaving Jake, ruining his life, and for not being honest with myself or any of my friends. But this morning, when I didn’t think about Jake seeing us kissing, that was replaced by a feeling that I’d been right to pursue this. To pursue Rachel, more to the point. I was still no closer to a label, but this morning, the only label that mattered was that I was happy.
Rachel had brought about a kind of happiness that filled me with such brightness, it was scary.
I let her go, and she picked up a chorizo from beside her, stripping its skin and chopping it finely.
“You think Tanya and Sophie are going to be okay about us?” I hadn’t really considered there would be any issues, and I hoped there weren’t.
“Course, why wouldn’t they be?” Rachel leaned over and kissed my lips before concentrating again.
“Don’t cut your fingers, Chef. They’re already quite precious to me.”
She gave me a grin and a bubble of happiness fizzed up my body.
“But what about you: how does it feel for you? Last night was a big night in your life.”
I exhaled. “It was. But you made it ridiculously easy.” I was drawn back to her lips: this morning, my whole world was Rachel-flavoured. “And weirdly, it’s like we’ve been doing it forever.”
Which was crazy, I knew, but Rachel already felt so familiar. I was beginning to see that sleeping with someone you knew so well added another dimension to the scenario.
Especially when that someone was capable of supplying a never-ending stream of gold-standard orgasms.
That part was definitely new.
“I know what you mean.” Rachel grinned my way. “Can you open the rice for me?” She indicated with her head and I followed her gaze to the risotto rice on the counter.
As she did so, she brushed her little finger over the top of my knuckle, and even that tiny action sent shockwaves tumbling down my spine, through every sinew of my body, landing between my legs. I held it together, but it was no mean feat.
I had so much more to give her, and she to me.
I also knew it had never been like this with a man. Not even with Jake. And Jake had been nothing but the perfect boyfriend: loving, gentle, kind. However, even at the height of our love-making, even when he was being the most considerate lover, he didn’t hold the power Rachel held in her little finger.
I’d be lying if I said that didn’t scare me. Last night was just the beginning; we’d barely scratched the surface. Yet one touch from her was enough to send me into orbit. It was a lot to take in, and I wanted to keep it to myself for a while.
I picked up the rice and studied my new lover: her long fingers, her strong arms, her strong cheekbones.
She was breathtaking. Everything I’d wanted, in fact.
“Rach,” I said, hoping my voice didn’t betray my nerves.
“Yeah?”
“Can I ask a favour?”
She looked at me. “Anything.”
I was in love with her voice already, and her mouth.
“Can we hold off telling the world for a while?” I tore open the top of the rice. “Just for a little bit? I kinda like our little cocoon.” Letting the world in on this seemed a little rude when it was still so new, so untouched.
She turned to me with such kind eyes, I stilled again.
“Course. We can talk about marriage on our next date, no rush.”
I furrowed my brow.
“Kidding!” Rachel reached out and squeezed my arm. “Jeez, you’re kinda easy to wind up.”
“So my sister tells me. My childhood was one long drama of me sobbing, my sister smirking and my mum trying to placate me.”
“And what will she think about you sleeping with a woman?” She threw the chorizo into the pan and it sizzled, filling the flat with delicious Mediterranean flavours.
Beside me, Delilah appeared from her basket, barking: she clearly had Spanish roots.
“Hello you,” I said, leaning down and making a fuss of her. I walked over to the balcony to throw open the French doors on what was already a gorgeous day. “Hold that thought,” I told Rachel with a smile, waiting for Delilah to pee on her designated pee pad. She was well trained, and I assumed that was Sophie’s doing, seeing as she was a dog walker.
I left her on the balcony barking at passing birds, and walked back into the flat, sniffing Spanish aromas, before getting Delilah’s breakfast. When she heard it hit her metal bowl, she was beside me in an instant. I left her chewing and washed my hands, before coming back to Rachel who was now adding rice, spices and stock. Once the sizzle had died down, she looked at me.
“You were saying about keeping this between us?”
I nodded. “It’s a big change and I want a little while to get used to it; to know what to say, how to react. Let all the feelings in me settle.” I wasn’t sure if she knew what she’d done to me, but it was monumental, life-changing.
“Sure. So long as I’m not a dirty little secret — my days of lying and sneaking around are done.”
I shook my head; she was anything but. “Of course not. My family already know this is on the cards.”
“I’m not just a no
tch on your bedpost?”
I shook my head before leaning over and kissing her lips. “If you are, you might be the most important one.” My voice shook as I spoke. “Do you remember your first time?”
An emotion I couldn’t pin down swept over Rachel’s face as she nodded. “I do. I met a woman in a club, got roaring drunk, snogged her up against a wall all night long and then we went back to hers and that was it. I remember coming home on the bus the following morning, back to my university halls, thinking everyone could see the difference in me, that it was so obvious. They couldn’t, but that’s what it’s like when you’re 19.”
“I wish I’d known you then.” And I did. I wanted to know everything about Rachel; every, tiny, intimate detail.
“I don’t, I was a mess. But that night changed my life, even if it wasn’t the best sex I’d ever had. Far from it.” She shivered as she held my gaze. “I hope your first time was better than mine?”
She looked so vulnerable when she spoke, my heart lurched. As far as I was concerned, Rachel walked on water and could do no wrong.
“It was everything,” I replied, kissing her hand, drowning in her uncertain stare. “I’m a lucky girl because I was in the best hands possible.”
Rachel blew out a relieved sigh. “I’m the lucky one.” She put down her wooden spoon, before turning to flick on Tanya’s coffee machine, grabbing two black mugs from her cupboard above the kettle.
She stopped, staring at me. “I was worried how you might react.”
“You were?”
She nodded, holding my stare. “Worried this was just something you needed to get out of your system.”
She shook as she spoke. Behind her, the coffee machine lit up to say it was ready. “But when I was with you, I didn’t think that at all. Because last night was very real for me. Frighteningly real.”
I walked over to her and took her face in my hands. I’d been so wrapped up in how huge this was for me, I hadn’t stopped to think about Rachel and how she was feeling.
How she might worry.
