The Moth and the Flame

by Reid, B. B.

  He didn’t immediately come to me once he was naked, though. He just stood at the foot of the bed, staring, and I knew he was waiting for me to change my mind.

  Holding his gaze, I let my shaking legs fall open instead. His gaze fell, and he sucked in a breath. In a flash, he was on top of me, kissing me hard and deep.

  I wrapped my legs around his waist and ran my hands down his powerful back. His hot skin against mine was the most natural feeling in the world. We’d never been this vulnerable with each other before, but somehow, I felt whole.

  He finally allowed us air, and my eyes drifted closed when he started kissing down my neck until he reached my breasts. Pulling my nipple inside his mouth, he suckled one and then the other until I was writhing.

  “Lou…”

  I slowly opened my eyes.

  “I won’t stop once I start,” he warned.

  Smiling, I dug my nails in his shoulders until he grimaced. “You better not.”

  He smirked as he grabbed my hands and lifted them over my head. Holding my wrists in one hand, he guided his cock to my slick opening with the other and began pushing inside of me.

  He got maybe an inch or two before my pussy rejected him. He tried to go deeper, and I cried out. I knew then that this wouldn’t be easy. He was even bigger than I thought.

  “Fuck, you’re tight, Lou.” He started to pull away, and I panicked. Tightening my legs around him, I held him in place.

  “Don’t.” I moaned.

  “I need to open you, baby, or this is going to hurt like hell.”

  I shook my head, fearing that if he stopped even for a moment, he’d back out. “I don’t care about the pain.”

  Getting rejected by him over and over had hurt a thousand times more.

  “I don’t want to hurt you,” he said, pleading.

  “And you will if you stop.”

  A silent battle of wills ensued that ended when he kissed me. It started slow and deepened by the second. It was perfect. So perfect I never even noticed when he gripped the back of my thigh, holding me open, or when his other hand curled around my neck, holding me down. That perfect kiss swallowed my scream after he pulled his hips back only to shove inside me so brutally he broke through my virginity in one stroke.

  There was no me and him after that, only us.

  That was how deep he’d gotten.

  He didn’t stop kissing me until my whimpers died, and when my eyes drifted open, I found him watching me.

  “Okay?” he asked me as he thumbed away my tears.

  “Never better,” I answered. My voice sounded hoarse, and there was a throbbing ache between my legs, but finally, having him inside me made it all worth it.

  He grinned and kissed me before smiling against my lips. “Stubborn girl.”

  And then he began to move.

  Carefully. Slowly allowing me to get used to feeling so full. To the need stirring in my belly. It wasn’t long before I started to move, too. Driven purely by instinct, I snaked my hips and clutched him tighter. Burying his face in my neck, he groaned as he drove himself deeper, his hand palming my breast while the other gripped the sheet. He moved faster now.

  Soon, my cries mingled with the sound of his heavy breaths and the bed rocking. The lewdness of the ruckus we were making only spurred us to finish. I felt him grip my hip as he picked up the pace. Neither of us gave a damn anymore that this was wrong.

  Best friends forever.

  It was nothing more than a broken promise now.

  “Fuck, Lou, I’m gonna come.”

  He started pulling away, to make it last, so I tightened around him, keeping him prisoner.

  “Baby.” He grunted. “We can’t. You—” His hips slammed into me one last time before he suddenly stiffened. “Fuuuuck!”

  I held him tight, stroking his back and cooing nonsense in his ear as he came inside me. I knew the risk we were taking was huge and that he’d be pissed, but I didn’t care. It wasn’t like I was trying to get knocked up. I only wanted all of him. Just this once until we were both ready.

  When his body finally slackened on top of mine, I slowly unwrapped my stiff legs from his waist and let them fall at my sides.

  He was still planted deep inside me and breathing hard when he lifted enough for me to see his glare. “Why did you do that?”

  “I wanted you to come,” I told him quietly. I couldn’t believe, after all that, I still found it in me to be shy. Perhaps it was the dark look he was giving me that told me I was in big trouble.

  “You wanted control,” he said, seeing right through me.

  Before I could deny it, I was flat on my stomach with my ass in the air, and my hair gripped tightly—almost cruelly—in his fist.

  My heart skipped a beat when I felt his cock lining up at my entrance. And just before he shoved his way back inside me, without regard for my lost virginity, he growled in my ear, “One alpha, Lou.”

  I let out a startled cry and gripped the sheets tightly when I felt him fill me. His cum was still seeping out of me, paving the way for him to plunder. Still, I felt tears sliding down my cheeks and didn’t know if they were from joy or the feel of him hitting the spot deep inside of me that made my breath catch every time.

  “I don’t come until I say. You don’t come until I say.” Pushing in even deeper, he said, “Feel me?”

  Oh, hell yeah, I felt him, and what’s more, I understood him. He made sure of it as he drove his point home over and over. The sound of our skin slapping was a constant reminder lest I forget so quickly.

  I pushed back into him, reveling in this side of him.

  I craved it.

  And if I had to push him to get it, I’d do it with open legs and willing cunt.

  I wanted to be owned. To be kept. A slave to his desires as well as mine.

  And if my reward for being a bad girl was a sore pussy, well then, Wren had better clear his schedule.

  I FUCKED MY BEST FRIEND. I should never have fucked my best friend. Because now I couldn’t stop fucking my best friend.

  As if hearing my thoughts, her pussy tightened around me, milking my cock and taking me for all I was worth. I should have been gentler, and I shouldn’t have taken her again so soon, but I was smart enough to know when my brain was no longer in control.

  Giving in to the pleasure, I closed my eyes, but the sounds she made as she started to come had me opening them again. Her skin was glistening with the sweat we worked up while her hair, still trapped in my fist, was in disarray. She never looked more beautiful to me.

  The moment she collapsed on the bed, utterly spent, I quickly pulled out of her and gripped my cock. The first time had been an epic fuckup, and I blamed myself. I could have stopped it if I wanted to, but at that moment, there had been nothing I wanted more than to fill her in every way.

  I got maybe three or four strokes in before I was coming again. Some of it landed on her back, and I growled my pleasure at seeing her covered in me. My limbs suddenly turned to jelly, and I crashed on the bed next to her as I struggled to catch my breath. Lou was so still next to me that the only sign of life was the steady rise and fall of her slender shoulders.

  Her long raven hair hung down her back, and I was already reminiscing about the way I held it in my fist like reins as I rode her. I reached out to run my hands through the silky tresses when I stopped short, a silent curse on my lips. Her hair fell more than halfway down her back just an inch or two above where I came on the small of her back.

  I stood from the bed and reached for her, but the moment I touched her, Lou stiffened. My heart dropped to my stomach, immediately fearing that I’d gone too far. Had I hurt her? I clenched my teeth and cursed myself for coming back here. After my world was turned upside down and the ground swept from under my feet, I’d gone for a drive. And when that hadn’t worked, I came running back to the one person who could piece me back together again. Lou had done that and more, and I repaid her by hurting her.

  I reached out to her agai
n, needing to offer her comfort.

  “Noooo,” she whined when I laid a hesitant hand on her lower back. “I can’t take anymore. Leave me alone.”

  I chuckled as relief washed over me. “We need to shower.”

  “Later,” she grumbled into the pillow she’d been biting moments ago. She sounded half asleep already.

  “I—” My cheeks heated as I tried to figure out a way to tell her what I’d done. After a few seconds, I blew out an aggravated breath. Fuck it. “I got some in your hair.”

  She lifted her head and frowned sleepily at me over her shoulder. “Some of what?”

  I tucked my lips inside my mouth and waited. Her eyes widened the moment it dawned.

  “Ewwww!” she shrieked. “Wren!”

  She tried to jump up from the bed and was immediately reminded that she’d just lost her virginity and not all that gently. I cursed before quickly scooping her up.

  “Sorry,” I muttered, and she lifted a brow at my apology.

  “For breaking me or for jizzing in my hair?”

  “Both.”

  She sighed as I entered the bathroom and set her on the counter. “I guess this makes us even.”

  She beamed up at me, but I didn’t return her smile. “We should haven’t done that.”

  “We’re teenagers,” she said as she rolled her eyes. “Being irresponsible is sort of our job.”

  I turned away, feeling my temper rising. I wasn’t a teenager, which meant I definitely knew better—more than she did. I told her so as I turned on the shower.

  “You were just nineteen three months ago. Relax, Mr. Harlan.”

  I shook my head and decided to keep my mouth shut. When Lou had her mind made up, there was almost no changing it. Her blatant disregard for her future only fueled the turmoil wreaking havoc in my head. We were on the run with no money. How the fuck could I possibly take care of her and a baby?

  Unless…she didn’t think we’d be around for the consequences? It was far more likely that we’d both die in a matter of days than get away from Fox forever. Peeking over my shoulder, I found her staring at the tile, a bleakness in her eyes that she didn’t want me to see.

  As if sensing my gaze, her head shot up, and the hopelessness cleared. “I’m sure Ever or Jamie have condoms we can use?” The smug satisfaction was gone from her voice, and in its place was that shy innocence that should have kept me from touching her in the first place.

  “Yeah,” I simply replied because I’d already decided that this wouldn’t happen again. We might be dead soon, but at least I’d die with my conscience mostly intact. I tested the water with my hand and then turned. “The water should be warm enough for you.”

  “Me?” she questioned as she carefully hopped off the counter. Two steps and she was backing me against the wall of the glass shower. I held my breath as her hands slid from my stomach up to my chest. “Just me?”

  “Just you,” I confirmed before looking away. I couldn’t take the sight of her big hopeful eyes staring up at me. “I’ll shower after.”

  I heard the hitch in her breath and felt her hands tremble on my chest. “You’re already regretting making love to me, aren’t you?”

  My nostrils flared as I met her gaze. “We didn’t make love. We fucked. The fact that you don’t know the difference is why I regret it.”

  Lou should have never trusted me with something so precious. I only touched her because I wanted to escape my past and what lay ahead—if only for a little while. I used her. Selfishly and callously.

  And I couldn’t undo it.

  Pushing her aside, I stormed from the bathroom. I pretended not to hear her sniffling as I gathered my discarded clothes and fled for the safety of the spare bedroom. Needing something to occupy my mind so that I wouldn’t go running to beg her forgiveness and worship her slowly like I should have done, I decided to take a shower.

  Of all the things on my list of regrets, not being able to give Lou her innocence back was at the top, so I’d cherish it forever instead.

  I’d been holding up the wall for the past hour watching the people crowding the room. The living room—almost twice the size of the family room that housed my father’s photo—had three sets of French doors leading to the veranda. They were thrown open despite the fires lit in the hearths at each end of the room.

  Lou sat on one of the bronze sofas pretending to listen to some old broad talk about fuck knows what. I could tell by the glazed look in her eyes that she was bored but was either too polite or too stubborn to walk away. I knew the latter was most likely.

  She hadn’t spoken a word or barely looked at me since I left her to shower alone. When she emerged from the bedroom in that red dress made of tulle and lace, I nearly swallowed my tongue. I told her, of course, that she looked beautiful, and she pretended she hadn’t heard me as she headed straight for the door. All I could do was follow her up to the main house like some sad puppy who’d lost its bone.

  The moment we’d stepped inside the mansion, guilt made me look around, searching for knowing gazes. None of them, however, seemed wise to the fact that I’d just finished screwing my best friend. Ever and Jamie flocked to me immediately, but after ten minutes of trying and failing to break my silence, they left me to my thoughts.

  Pushing away from the wall, I drifted closer to where Lou sat when I noticed she no longer looked bored. She was tuned in to whatever the woman was saying. So much so that she didn’t see when I came to stand right behind her.

  “That’s a cool piece,” Lou complimented, nodding to the gold pin adorning the woman’s dress. It seemed like a risky thing to do given the embroidered lace, so I figured it must have been important.

  “Thank you.” The woman beamed. “It’s been in my family for a long time. I guess you could say it’s our family heirloom since it’s the culmination of our wealth.”

  I’ll say. The freaking thing had rubies for eyes.

  “Interesting choice for a family mascot,” Lou said, and I heard her unspoken question.

  “Over decades, the Mac Conchradha name has evolved, becoming anglicized and more modern. M’Concroe, M’Ecroe until it became as simple as Crowe.” I frowned as my mind began to race, but neither Lou nor the woman sensed the storm building within me. “It seemed fitting that it became an emblem for my family,” the woman said proudly.

  “But I thought your last name was Kelly?”

  “It is, dear. Naturally, my son and I took my husband’s name when I married.”

  “I’m sorry…your son?” Lou looked around the room, and I knew she was searching for him.

  The woman placed her hand on Lou’s as if comforting her. “By the time I learned that my husband was promised to another, I was already pregnant. His first wife’s family had money while mine did not. For sixteen years, Bart denied his son, leaving me alone to struggle.” If Lou was startled by her sudden candidness, she didn’t let on. “It wasn’t until his wife died in childbirth along with his would-be heir that we came to an agreement and married. Our wedding was actually where my son and Thomas met and became fast friends. Unfortunately, my son was already headstrong and independent and didn’t take to his father as well as he did Thomas. He’d gotten himself mixed in with some terrible people, and the hold they had on him was strong. Bart thought”—the woman took a deep breath as if gathering strength—“if he disowned our son, he would come around.” In a whispered tone, almost as if it was a secret, she said, “It’s been over thirty years since I’ve seen my son. I don’t even know if he’s still alive.”

  “That’s horrible,” Lou said sympathetically, and I could hear her sincerity even as the world seemed to fade away. “I’m so sorry, Claire.”

  “I’m over seventy years old. If he’s alive, I hope I get to see my son just once before I go.”

  “What’s his name?”

  “Sean. Sean Everson Kelly.” Just then, Claire looked up, and I met my grandmother’s gaze for the first time. “Oh. Hello, dear. I didn’t see you
standing there.” I felt Lou watching me now as Claire smiled at me. “You’re a handsome devil, aren’t you? You remind me a little of my son. Actually…” She squinted as she studied me closely, and the longer she stared, the harder it became to breathe.

  Before either of us could say what we were thinking, fearing, hoping, the doors leading to the formal dining room were thrown open. A man in a large white chef’s hat announced that dinner was served, and everyone moved at once.

  I waited for Lou and Claire to pass before following them inside the dining room. Thomas took his place at the head of the table with Rosalyn playing the disinterested hostess at the other end. The rest of us were shown our places, and Lou was seated next to a man with a gray, bushy beard and piercing blue eyes. He nodded to her and then me, his only greeting, before focusing on Four, who was seated across from him on her mother’s right. I sat next to Lou before I could be told, and Jamie sat on my left. I found it odd when Ever sat next to a girl with lush reddish-blonde hair and empty blue eyes rather than Four. Claire, the man I assumed to be my douchebag grandfather, and some tiny girl with dark skin and the biggest brown eyes I’d ever seen, separated them. And on Thomas’s left, across from the strawberry blonde, sat the couple I assumed to be her parents.

  In total, there were fourteen dinner guests, and most of them looked like they’d rather be anywhere else.

  More people in white hats started bringing out the food. The last to be placed on the table was the roasted turkey that looked to be at least twenty pounds. Thomas stood and said a few words, and when he finished, he looked at Rosalyn expectantly.

  “Thank you all for coming,” she managed to say before returning to staring blankly out the window. I glanced at Four, whose face was clenched as if in pain, before glancing at Ever. He looked like he was fighting himself against going to her, and I wondered why. Glancing at the stoic beauty next to him, I suddenly had a vague recollection of Jamie mentioning Ever having two girlfriends. Surely Ever wouldn’t be dumb enough to have them both here with all of their parents in attendance as well?