Omega Lost (The Rogue Pack Book 7)

by Samantha Cayto

  Out of respect for her, Loki lifted his own glass with deliberate care and drank half of it down. Then, he placed the glass against Eli’s lips and helped the pup take a few sips. He alternated between the two of them before the glass was empty. When he returned it to the table, he placed it on the opposite side of where Bard was sitting.

  The gamma flashed a smile. “There now, isn’t it better the milk is inside you and Eli than on me?”

  Loki was so surprised that the guy had not only gleaned Loki’s thoughts, but was also poking fun at it, that he couldn’t think of any snarky reply. Mabel giggled and winked at him when he shot her a look. With a shake of his head, he decided to ignore the whole thing and concentrate on finishing his breakfast. His hunger wasn’t completely assuaged, and he found himself practically licking his plate.

  “Here.” Bard placed two small chocolate chip muffins in front of him. “You obviously need this more than I.”

  The move surprised Loki. To his way of thinking, this constituted dessert even if it was breakfast. He eyed Bard suspiciously. What kind of game was this?

  A weird look crossed the gamma’s face, almost a hurt one. “Do you think I set some kind of trap for you? You’re hungry and there is no need for you to be. Eat. Or, do you want me to bring you something else?”

  Slowly, Loki shook his head. “No. Thanks. These are fine. They smell wonderful.” And they did, too. He picked up one and took a big bite of it before Eli could grab it from his hand. Mabel and Craig had not yet introduced sweets into their pups’ diets. On the one hand, he felt bad for the kid. On the other…He moaned as the burst of chocolate hit his tongue.

  Bard gave a strangled cough, but Loki ignored him. He hadn’t had the pleasure of slowly eating anything sweet in seemingly forever. His eyelids drooped as he savored his treat. He popped the rest into his mouth, stuffing it to overflowing. Spots of melted chocolate dotted his forefinger and thumb. He licked the one and sucked on the other. Over his knuckles he saw Bard staring at him. The gamma’s eyes were flinty and his pupils blown wide as they had been the previous night.

  Loki froze with his thumb still stuck between his lips. He swallowed the food in his mouth, yet still felt as if his throat were blocked. His lungs weren’t working right, either. It was as if not enough air was getting in them. His wolf perked up and whined, causing him to whimper in response.

  Bard jerked, then looked away. He cleared his throat and reached for the pitcher again. “You need more milk.” He slammed the glass in front of Loki with sufficient force to make the milk splash up against the sides. “Drink up before you choke.” Sliding his chair back, he popped to his feet. “I have work to do. Stay out of trouble.”

  That last command made the fur on the back of Loki’s neck stand up—literally. He shifted it back with a grimace. But he also picked up the glass of milk and washed the rest of his muffin down, because damn, it was exactly what he needed.

  Mabel giggled as she stood. “Come on. Now that you’ve tortured your gamma, let’s clean up and get to the weaving shed.”

  Loki hefted Eli against his shoulder and staggered to his feet before grabbing the second muffin to eat on the way. “He’s not my gamma.”

  Except he wasn’t so sure of that anymore.

  ****

  “Damn it, this seam is all crooked. I’m going to have to take out the stitches and try again.”

  Loki looked over at Reed, who sat against the opposite wall of the small alcove they dedicated to needlework. The pregnant omega had a large quilt covering his lap and he was staring at his latest efforts with a frown on his face. Even at a distance of a few feet, Loki could see that the guy had been having trouble.

  Putting aside his own quilt, Loki scooted over. “Want some help?”

  Reed seemed surprised by the offer and little wonder. The few times they’d interacted, Loki had been pretty horrid to him. “Do you mind? You’re so talented with this stuff, I’d love help.”

  Loki felt his cheeks heat up. He wasn’t used to praise. Not recently anyway. “Sure, it’s no trouble.” He slid against the wall next to Reed and peered closely at the problem seam. “Your technique for the basic running stitch is fine. I mean they’re fairly uniform in length and short tight lines are good.

  “You’re just having trouble keeping it straight.” He snorted and glanced at Reed. “I guess I’m not telling you anything you don’t already know.”

  Reed smiled back. “Yeah, I start out fine, then end up running off the rails somehow.”

  “It’s tricky and takes practice for the most part. This is your first time at quilting, isn’t it?”

  “It is. I’ve been stuck inside for so long, I wanted to do something to get ready for the pup. There’s no end to baby stuff you can buy in the human world, but I kind of wanted to make something.”

  “Oh, that’s nice.” Loki meant it. Before, in his old life, he’d intended to do the same. Now, after resisting settling into the pack in any way, he’d decided to put his skills to use for its benefit. It was only fair that he contribute. He could sew well enough to make quality items for sale to the humans.

  “May I?” he asked holding his hands out.

  “Please.” Reed handed the square he was working on over to Loki.

  Loki finished removing the recent stitches before starting the row again. “You want to use the edge of your finger as a guide. It will help you place the needle in the right place.” He demonstrated what he meant and had the line running straight within seconds.

  “Wow,” Reed said, taking the cloth back. “You’re amazing.”

  “Not really.” Loki ducked his head, uncomfortable with the compliment. “I’ve been doing it longer, that’s all.” He rested his head against the wall and let himself think of home. It was often so painful to do so, he shut his memories down before they got far in his head.

  “Back in my old pack, winters were long. We spent a lot of time inside. My mother and I could spend practically the whole day sewing.” While her image was faded in his mind, he could still picture her. “She was so patient with me.”

  “You lost her?” Reed’s question was asked in a quiet voice.

  Loki nodded. “I was pretty young. My sire mated with a sigma soon after. She was nice to me and we sewed together, too. It wasn’t the same. She didn’t give him any pups before she got sick and died. That was about a year before we left.”

  He wanted to say before Destin stole me away, but didn’t want to be provocative for once. The peaceful interaction with another omega was a welcome respite from the constant turmoil he’d been in. He crawled back to his previous spot to pick up his own work before rejoining Reed. It was cozier to sit side-by-side, and for some reason, he felt like socializing.

  Reed gnawed at his lower lip as he concentrated on his needlework. “Leaving my mother behind was hard. I know I won’t see her again, so it’s kind of like she died. At least she was done whelping pups and I hope the rest of her life is easier than it has been. My sire finally got his alpha off her, anyway. That should make things better for her.”

  Loki frowned. “My sire still didn’t have an alpha by the time I was forced to go.” Well, there was no hiding his bitterness entirely, apparently.

  “I hadn’t realized that. Destin is such a powerful beta that it’s almost like he’s an alpha.”

  “Almost,” Loki conceded. “Not good enough, though. A pack needs an alpha and I know my sire was very upset and worried when first my mother, then the sigma, didn’t give him one. I remember overhearing him talking to Destin one night about it.”

  It had really been more of an argument, their heated voices waking him. He’d crept into the great room where they stood with angry faces and flinging biting words. Except he hadn’t understood why Destin was so mad at their sire, or what they were saying.

  “You can’t be serious! This scheme of yours is insupportable, Alpha.”

  “It’s not your place to judge my decisions. You are only a beta, and no use
to me as a successor. If I don’t try this, then who takes over the pack?”

  We can always join this one to my uncle’s. He’s a good alpha, and-”

  “No! I will not tolerate him taking what’s mine. He’s already cheated me by giving me his sister. If she’d been any worth at all, she’d have whelped me an alpha.”

  Their words had gotten uglier at that point, both Destin and their sire livid, spit flying. Their sire had even struck Destin. It had taken all of Loki’s willpower to hold back a whine of distress. He’d slithered back to his room, thrown the covers over his head and pretended he’d heard nothing at all. The next day, there’d been no outward sign that the fight had ever occurred. His sire and Destin had acted the same as they’d always done.

  Until a couple of weeks later, when Destin had woken Loki with a stern admonishment to remain silent. He’d forced Loki to go outside where Bard and Carr already waited, shifted and vigilant the way gammas always were. Destin had commanded a frightened and resistant Loki to shift, using a power rare in a beta and one he’d never used on Loki before. Then they had run.

  His pleasant interlude with Reed was turning sour with his thoughts. He shook his head to symbolically get rid of them and concentrated on his stitching. Of course, he was in the process of sewing scenes on his quilt squares. Quite automatically, he’d used his thread to recreate the beauty of his arctic home. The cloth he held contained a replica of the mountain range he’d grown up at the base of. Hard to forget what he’d lost when he kept putting it right in front of his own eyes.

  “Mind if I join you?” Seth dragged his feet over, fatigue showing in every slow step. “The boys are finally full and sleeping.” The far end of the weaving hut had been converted into a nursery. The formerly feral omega had a basket in his arms with wool spilling out. He plopped down in the space Loki had recently vacated.

  “Sure,” Reed said, his focus still on what his fingers were doing.

  Loki flashed Seth a smile. He didn’t know the boy well. He didn’t know anyone well, truth be told. That was all on him. Since arriving at the Rogue Pack, he’d kept everyone at a distance, mostly because a stubborn part of him still clung to the hope that all of this running away crap was temporary.

  With a sigh, Seth took his knitting out of the basket and got to work. “At the rate I’m going, this blanket is going to be finished sometime around the boys’ first pack run.”

  Loki huffed out a laugh. That would be years in the future given that the twin sigmas were practically newborn. “I bet it won’t take that long. You’re getting really fast with those needles.”

  “You think so? Good to hear, thanks.” Seth seemed happy to get the compliment. “Mabel said that, too, but you know her, she’s always so encouraging. I figured she was only being nice.” The import of his statement must of have occurred to him a second later. He glanced up at Loki. “Not that you’re not nice, or anything.”

  Loki rolled his eyes. “It’s okay. I didn’t take offense, and we all know that ‘nice’ isn’t the first thing that pack members would call me.” When both Seth and Reed looked like they intended to disagree, he hastened to say, “It’s fine, really. I know how much of a brat I am.”

  A few seconds of awkward silence ticked by. Loki stared at his square and forced his fingers to sew until Reed put his hand on his arm. “We all know how hard it is for you to be in a strange place because we’ve all been there. Even me, someone who wanted to leave his old pack. You’re not alone, Loki. We get it.”

  Seth nodded. “He’s right.”

  A lump formed in his throat and he had to blink pesky tears away again. “Thanks.” He didn’t trust himself to say more. So he didn’t. Instead, he went back to sewing and allowed himself to enjoy the company of other omegas as they did what their kind had done for centuries. Here and now, there was nothing to be angry about or worry over. He could simply be.

  Chapter Three

  Bard squatted down on his haunches, careful to keep his dirty boots away from the cozy rugged corner of the weaving hut where Loki lay sleeping. The other omegas had quietly left with pups in tow for the midday meal. Loki had drifted off while working on what appeared to be quilting squares. Bard hadn’t considered the omega in such domestic terms, but of course, Loki had been raised in a traditional manner. He did beautiful needlework if Bard was any judge. Fine stitching throughout the pieces of cloth created lovely pictures. It was heartbreaking to see that they were scenes from their former home. Looking at them gave Bard a stab of longing that he hadn’t permitted himself to feel since they’d left.

  All curled up in a small heap with his fist under his chin, Loki looked so peaceful and untroubled. Bard hated to wake him. He considered bringing the meal out to the boy, except food was clearly the wrong thing to bring into a place where the omegas created such nice items. Much of what they made was sold to humans for a tidy sum according to Destin. And while Bard had no idea what Loki intended to do with his project, soiling it would be a pity. So would selling it, he thought idly. It would make a lovely quilt for their own home—his and Loki’s. Except there he went, getting a head of himself.

  “Loki?” he called softly. “Wake up, time to eat.”

  With a little moan that flicked at Bard’s cock, Loki licked his lips and twitched. His eyelids fluttered open, and for a second, he looked sweet and innocent. Then his gaze landed on Bard and his eyes hardened. “What do you want?”

  The look and the tone hurt Bard more than he wanted to admit. He stood. “We need to go to the longhouse for the midday meal.”

  “Oh.” Loki pushed up to his knees and frowned. “I fell asleep.”

  “Yeah, Reed and Seth said you kind of drifted off mid-stitch and they didn’t have the heart to wake you.”

  “Oh,” Loki said again and his frown deepened. “That’s weird.”

  Not weird at all considering he was an omega on the cusp of his first heat. Knowing the boy would hate to be reminded of that, Bard kept his mouth shut. He merely held out his hand to help Loki get up. Of course, the brat ignored the offer and pushed to his feet on his own.

  As they headed out, Bard resisted the impulse to put his hand on the small of the omega’s back to keep him steady after being abruptly woken. He knew Loki would hate the contact and the implication. It made Bard almost desperate with frustration and wanting to do something, anything, to make Loki happy.

  The answer came to him in a flash. “Hey, uh, after we eat, how about taking a run?”

  Loki stumbled to a halt. “A run?” He narrowed his gaze and stared at Bard.

  “Yes. Just the two of us. It’s been awhile, right? You didn’t join the last pack run a few weeks ago. Would you like that?”

  “What do I have to do to earn it?”

  Bard’s heart broke a little more at the boy’s suspicion. “Nothing. I figured you’re a little stir-crazy and you and your wolf would like the exercise. No strings attached. What do you say?”

  A slow smile spread across the omega’s lips, the sight of it stirring both longing and unexpected happiness in Bard. “Yes.”

  ****

  Bard hadn’t put any conditions on the run taking place, but he’d still been pleased when Loki nevertheless behaved himself all during the meal. Part of it might have been the boy had been so busy stuffing his face, he hadn’t had time or opportunity to be contentious. He’d consumed almost as much food as Bard had. The unusual hunger coupled with the mid-morning nap was a clear indication that the omega was heading into heat. Bard didn’t need for the healer or anyone else to tell him that.

  The notion both thrilled Bard and worried him. There was no indication that Loki had thawed in his view of Bard any. Perhaps the run was Bard’s subconscious way of bribing Loki into being more kindly disposed to him. He didn’t like to think so, yet there was no denying that Loki was having a great time.

  Bard let the omega take the lead. Loki in wolf form was as diminutive as his human one. The wolf’s short legs were a blur of movement
, scampering through the woods at top speed. Bard trailed after him at an almost sedate lope. It took nothing to keep the streak of white fur in his vision. With the pack’s old enemy, Haldon, eliminated and his remaining shifters integrated into the Rogues, there was no worry in letting Loki run free. Bear sightings were rare in the surrounding woods, although it was the time of year when they’d be coming out of hibernation. Bard kept his snout raised, sniffing for any signs of trouble.

  Soon, Loki’s flat out run overwhelmed him and his speed flagged. Bard pulled up beside him and took stock of their surroundings. They’d traveled to the very limit of the pack’s expanded territory. Having spent lots of time exploring the area while on patrol, Bard knew a good spot that Loki might enjoy. He chuffed and nudged the omega to go left. After a moment’s hesitation, Loki headed in the indicated direction. They passed through a stand of trees and into a small clearing.

  Loki came to an abrupt spot and looked around before he lifted his head and let out a howl of delight. The sound of unbridled joy lightened Bard’s mood more than the run had. Pleasing Loki had been the goal, and knowing he’d achieved that made him very happy. He double checked that nothing dangerous lurked nearby, then sat down on his haunches and watched Loki explore the area.

  There was a towering outcrop of rock with ice cold spring water cascading down. Not quite a waterfall, but close enough. It emptied into a small pool, that then fed the stream running through the pack lands. Maine was not so far south that there wasn’t still some patches of snow dotting the bank. The cool, crisp air was welcome to Bard’s arctic-raised constitution. He assumed Loki felt the same.

  Indeed, with a yip, Loki jumped into the pool and paddled around. Bard almost joined him. The omega was clearly having fun, and Bard was not so old that he didn’t have the urge to act like a pup every now and again. The only thing holding him back was his fierce need to protect his vulnerable omega charge and future mate. There would hopefully be time enough for the two of them to frolic together as both wolves and men.