Omega Lost (The Rogue Pack Book 7)

by Samantha Cayto

  That space would be his. The pup would be his. He’d finally have a home of his making. It should have elated him. On many levels it did, but there was something missing. Someone. He’d always pictured his life with a mate. Of course, he had. A strong dominant who would protect him and their pups and hopefully shower them with some affection. Despite what others thought or he’d claimed in some of his brattier moments, he didn’t care about mating with an alpha. He only wanted a good man.

  He realized that Bard had stopped speaking and was waiting for Loki to respond. He eyed the gamma and noticed something that he almost thought he was imagining. He’s nervous. The gamma actually cared what Loki thought. Understanding that he was truly being taken seriously, not merely being humored, helped him put aside the last of his pique and act like a grown-up.

  “It’s good. I like the lay-out. Thanks,” he added with a shy smile.

  Bard’s response was not as tentative. His handsome face lit up. “I’m glad. We really did try to think of what you’d like. And, we shouldn’t have tried to determine it when all we needed to do was ask.”

  “It’s okay.” Loki dropped his gaze. “I won’t complain to the alpha. I overreacted.” He wanted to alleviate any worries the gamma had over that point because suddenly and disconcertingly, he wasn’t picturing some mythical dominant sharing that home with him and the pup.

  He saw Bard.

  ****

  “Thank you all for taking time out of your afternoon for this council meeting.”

  From his vantage point way down at the foot of the conference table, Bard hid his surprise over the alpha’s opening remarks. He was still not used to the way Lorcan did business, apparently. When the alpha called a meeting, pack members showed up. There was nothing voluntary about it. He doubted Lorcan was surprised at the full complement of council members sitting around him, but the fact that he was willing to show gratitude set him apart from others of his kind.

  Bard had to also sit on his own misgivings about everyone being there instead of some being on sentry duty. Whatever the alpha was about to say, he wanted the full council in attendance. That meant relying on Griffin and his two gammas to patrol the perimeter. The former Haldon Pack members had proven trustworthy throughout the winter. Lorcan had come to trust them well enough to rely on them for this task for a few hours. There had been no signs of interlopers or other dangers since the final conflict with Haldon, so it was a small risk.

  Nevertheless, Bard felt a sense of unease. Loki was out there, likely in the weaving hut as his skills ran toward tasks involving needle and thread. He was surrounded by other omegas and the sigmas, many of whom were sufficiently big to be protective if need be. There was really nothing for him to do except listen to whatever his alpha wanted him to hear. And yet, Bard’s thoughts kept returning to the omega he’d bred. Perhaps that was to be expected given that his pup gestated inside the boy. Despite their not having mated, Bard was hardly in a position to ignore his tie to Loki. It wasn’t usual among the arctic, but it was there, and he needed to figure out a way to interact with Loki that would be solicitous without overstepping his bounds.

  It was going to be damn hard. They’d made a good step forward already, however. The dust-up with the new hut had ended well. Loki had been pleased with the building plans, and Bard had managed to accept that he needed to approach Loki differently. No more treating him like a wayward pup. Loki the brat was becoming Loki the father. Bard had had to adjust his thinking, and his reward had been a happy and changed Loki. Until the omega had praised his efforts and acknowledged his own faults in their spat, Bard hadn’t appreciated how much he wanted a good relationship with the boy, one where they met on more even emotional ground.

  Lorcan claimed his attention once more. “I expect many of you are uncomfortable being together while depending on Griffin and the gammas. Part of what I want to discuss is offering them full membership in the pack. Thoughts?”

  “They’ve proven themselves to my satisfaction, Alpha,” Deirdre spoke up.

  “Agreed,” Finn added. “They’ve done everything we’ve asked of them and then some. My only hesitation is that they did live by Haldon’s rules and I worry that they haven’t been able to shake the behavior that he instilled in them. Does the alpha mate have an opinion about their reliability in that regard?”

  That was a good question. Before he’d been mated to Lorcan, Kyle would have spent time around the dominants of his sire’s pack. He’d seen them at potentially their worst and likely had a good sense of whether they were among those who reveled in Haldon’s viciousness or merely did what was necessary to survive.

  Lorcan nodded. “As a matter of fact, he does. He tells me that they were all fairly low in status. They also didn’t stand out as being among those members who’d embraced his sire’s ways with enthusiasm. Actually, he told me that Griffin was always particularly solicitous of Ryan.”

  That reminded Bard of his last encounter with the beta. Leaning forward, he said, “Your pardon, Alpha, Griffin did recently ask me how the omega was doing. It was obvious from what he said that he hated how Haldon had treated Ryan.”

  The alpha swung his gaze toward Bard. He didn’t appear bothered by a gamma speaking up. “That syncs with what I’ve observed myself. Being a member of my family, and not only the pack, I’ve been watchful of Ryan. He never seems alarmed by Griffin’s proximity. I would think that he’d be a useful measure of the beta’s character, and his lack of fear is a good sign. Whatever Griffin did while under Haldon’s rule, I don’t think he did it with relish, only out of duty and pack loyalty.”

  Destin spoke up. “That is often how it is in packs with cruel alphas. Some members revel in following their alpha’s lead, while others simply do what they must.”

  Bard averted his gaze, not wanting to embarrass his old friend with his feelings, which he assumed were readable on his face. He did share a knowing look with Carr. What Destin described was exactly their collective experience. They would still be tamping down their natural revulsion for their old alpha’s behavior if he hadn’t taken it a step too far to bear.

  Lorcan nodded. “So, it is agreed? No one has an objection? If you do, now is the time to speak.” When nothing more was said, he rapped his knuckles on the table. He had adopted it as a way of saying something was settled. Bard was used to an alpha using a wooden gavel or something else that stood as a symbol of an alpha’s power. Lorcan needed nothing except his own body to claim his position.

  “The next order of business is trickier, but I’ve given it a lot of thought.” He looked around the table. “This pack was founded on the premise that its members were running away from something. Many of you have joined since for your own reasons, and we welcome you. We’ve also seen our numbers grow organically as is natural. We have so many pups crawling around—or, in the case of Annie, running on all fours.”

  The alpha flashed a grin at Finn when he mentioned the adorable and unusual pup. Everyone else smiled and chuckled. She was a uniquely amazing part of the pack.

  “But,” the alpha continued with a dimming of his expression, “we’ve also seen too much drama and crises around the breeding of our omegas. Loki is only the most recent example.”

  At the mention of what Bard thought of as his omega, he sat up straighter and focused sternly on his alpha. He wasn’t sure he liked where this new topic was heading.

  “With the threat from Haldon gone, we have time now to take stock of who and what we are and how our pack will grow in the near future. It’s not enough to be reactive anymore. I’m disappointed in myself for doing so much on the fly for so long.” There was a general murmur of dissent, the others not liking their alpha criticizing himself.

  “Most of us owe you our lives, Alpha,” Destin chimed in. “Or, at least, the safe and happy home you have given us. I’m sure I speak for all of us by saying we are honored to be in your pack and would fault you for nothing.”

  There were more affirmations and head-noddi
ng around the table. The sound grew to the point where Lorcan had to put up his hand. The noise stopped instantly. Sitting there and seeing Lorcan’s powerful influence, not for the first time, but perhaps more clearly now that his own life had changed significantly, Bard’s sense of loyalty for the alpha grew tenfold. He understood what Lorcan was saying. Bard, too, had been simply reacting to things far too long—Destin’s bid to protect Loki, survival, and then settling with the Rogues as the first, best option to come their way for Loki’s sake if for no other reason. He hadn’t considered whether he liked the idea of being part of this pack solely for himself. And, he truly appreciated how Loki and his pup were going to live safely under Lorcan’s rule. Wherever the man was going with this meeting, Bard would back him.

  “I appreciate the sentiment, Destin. From all of you,” Lorcan added, taking the time to look each of them in the eye. “But, I’ve thought long and hard about this and spoken with my mate, as well, to gauge how my plans for the pack might be received by the servient members. And, I’ve decided that we need to start acting more like a traditional pack. Being different is all well and good, but there are time-honored traditions of our species that shouldn’t be tossed out because of abuses in the past.”

  “What are you thinking, Alpha,” Craig asked. Normally gammas kept their mouths shut in council meetings until asked a direct question, or as in his own case, had some important information to share. Strategy and questions were for betas. Craig, though, had known Lorcan longer than almost anyone else.

  “I want to call a gathering of packs this summer and host the event here.”

  There was stunned silence for a few seconds while everyone absorbed the idea. On the face of it, there was nothing remarkable about the suggestion. Shifter packs often held gatherings with neighbors to trade goods and knowledge—and fuck it all, members. A spike of alarm shot through him.

  He spoke out without a second thought. “Excuse me, Alpha. Is this intended to increase the pool of mates for our pack members?”

  Lorcan didn’t seem to take notice of Bard’s accusatory tone, which was clear to Bard’s ears, certainly, despite his not intending to use one. The alpha’s gaze was not unkind. “That is definitely one of the benefits possible from the gathering, yes. I’ve been thinking of this long before Loki’s heat. His crisis and the distress it caused was only the most recent incident. There was Joey before him, Will, and Seth. Even Ben, although his problems started before he got here.

  “We simply can’t expect that our growing number of omegas will be properly mated within our own pack. Nor, frankly, can we plan on that for the rest of our pack members and pups. Our sigmas have paired up as much as their personalities and desires have allowed, even with the addition of the Haldon Pack members. At this point, there are too many of us who remain unmated. Eventually, the problem will grow as the pups get older and sow disaffection within the pack given that our species isn’t designed to live unmated lives. I won’t let that happen.”

  Sitting back, Bard stared at the table top. He couldn’t argue with the alpha’s logic. Establishing relationships with other packs would be beneficial. The idea of another shifter seducing Loki, though, sent Bard’s wolf pacing in agitation. He’d been laying low, entirely satisfied with himself over the breeding. Now, however, he was pressing against Bard’s mind, goading him over how the omega was theirs. Human-based rational thought and a sense of fairness to Loki’s self-determination didn’t mean shit to his wolf. He was all primitive instinct, and right now, he was done with Bard’s patience.

  Bard waged an internal struggle that he worked to hide from the others. This was his problem and he knew his need for Loki couldn’t be a factor in the council’s decision about calling a gathering. It would be good for the pack. He understood that. There was much that the Rogues had to offer that other packs would trade for. Among those things, Loki sat like a jewel in a human crown. No New England based packs would have any member as beautifully alluring as him. The boy was a catch, to be sure. His breeding state would only make him more attractive to lower dominants, despite Destin’s worry that Bard had somehow ruined Loki’s chances for mating. Fecundity was what made omegas so appealing, and with the pup he carried guaranteed to be arctic, it would add an even more desirable diversity to any pack.

  No.

  That was Bard’s human mind, not his wolf, rebelling at the idea. There was more than one primitive beast living inside his skin. No amount of analysis of what made the most sense for Loki or the rest of the pack was going to convince Bard that he didn’t have something to worry about. Losing Loki and his pup to another shifter was intolerable. Their leaving to live elsewhere was inconceivable. Bard needed to find a way to entice the omega into mating. That had always been the plan, but with Lorcan’s pack gathering on the table, the need was now more urgent.

  “What packs were you thinking of contacting, sir?” Daniel asked.

  “I was hoping you had some ideas. I know there are a few farther north in Maine and some in Vermont and New Hampshire. We can’t host more than a couple at one time, so do you have any suggestions?”

  The city-boy beta rubbed his chin. “Huh. Well, if it’s powerful alliances you’re after, I would try for the Strongblood Pack. They’re way up near Fort Kent, living deep inside the North Maine Woods and ranging into Canada.”

  Liam whistled through his teeth. “I’ve heard of them.”

  “Me too,” Caleb added. The big Canadian gamma usually kept his mouth shut at meetings. A great guy in a fight and a wonderful mate to Seth, he was total mush with his twin sons. But if anyone had knowledge of a Northern Maine pack, it would be him. “We steered clear of them back in my old pack. They’re big wolves. I mean, like huge.”

  If Caleb thought of the Strongbloods as larger than typical for shifters, that was saying something. The idea of inviting a pack like that into the Rogues’ lands made Bard and his wolf nervous.

  “Aren’t they still kind of living in caves?” Liam asked.

  Daniel shook his head. “Not really. They are pretty resistant to progress, and they definitely have a reputation of being secluded and traditional. But, I’ve seen stuff in shifter chatrooms that indicates their current alpha is pulling them into the modern era. His pack members obviously respect and fear him based on what I’ve seen them post. They’re pretty proud of his badass status.”

  Lorcan grinned. “Sounds like a guy I’d like to meet so long as he comes in peace and doesn’t try to raid my pack.”

  “He doesn’t have that kind of reputation, sir,” Daniel replied. “They are fierce defenders of their territory, as Caleb indicated, but I’ve heard nothing of them aggressing on others.”

  “I haven’t heard anything like that, either,” Liam agreed.

  “Nor have I,” Caleb added. “We just stayed away from their boundaries.”

  Lorcan rapped the table again. “All right, we ask. Daniel, do you think you can make inroads there online?”

  “I’ll do my best, sir.”

  “Great. Anyone else come to mind?”

  “I’d say a good balance would be Green Mountain Pack.”

  Deirdre snorted. “I know them. My sire tried to mate me off with one of their betas.”

  A growl reverberated across the table. Everyone looked at Destin. He ducked his head. “Sorry.”

  Deirdre surprised Bard by smiling at the reaction and the apology. The two betas might be struggling to reconcile a mating of equals, but there was genuine affection there for all to see. “Anyways,” she continued, “they’re the complete opposite of the Strongbloods. They’ve been living pretty integrated with humans for a while. They struck me as smart and progressive. They’d be a good pack to trade with.”

  No one dared question Deirdre about why she’d run instead of mating with someone from the Green Mountain Pack. It seemed obvious to Bard, regardless. If she was having trouble accepting Destin as her mate, there was little chance she could have fit in with any established pack no matter ho
w modern. She was too dominant to be any mate’s submissive. And the idea of a female mating with a male subordinate to her was one that would take time for any of their species to accept. Their kind hadn’t advanced in gender equality even half as much as the humans.

  Lorcan rapped the table for the third time. “Then they will be our second invitees. If one or both of them reject our overture, we’ll reconvene and think of others.” He turned to Daniel. “Can we count on you to pursue both packs?”

  “Yes, sir. In fact, I have an online contact with the Green Mountain Pack already. As Deirdre said, they’re very advanced in their way of living. I’m sure they’ve already heard of us from the snippets I’ve gleaned. I’ve received some probing about your existence. I played it cagey, but it does mean they are at least curious.”

  “Let’s hope it’s in a good way,” Lorcan said. “Okay, that’s the plan. We’ll need to bring the sigmas in quickly on this given how much work it will make for them.”

  A thought occurred to Bard. “Excuse me, Alpha?” When he got a nod, he continued. “We’re in the process of building the family longhouse you approved. I’d like to get that done first so Loki has a home base to whelp in.”

  “Of course. You have my permission to prioritize the sigmas’ work schedule to getting that done quickly.”

  “Thank you, Alpha.” Loki needed that private space, and the sooner Bard gave it to him, the sooner he could go about convincing the omega that the gamma who bred him would be the perfect addition to the boy’s new home.

  He started to rise from his seat, anxious to get back to the construction project, when Lorcan started speaking again. Shit. His mind was a muddle if he could forget something as basic as not getting up before the alpha officially ends the meeting.

  “I just want to confirm that we will do a full-moon pack run again. That will be next week and with Griffin and his boys in the pack, it will mean anyone who wants can join in. It’s just one more shifter tradition that I want to instill in us. We’ve been in defense mode for so long, it will be heartening to everyone to do something so normal and enjoyable.”