Woman of His Heart

by Donna Fasano

  Although he hadn’t told Lyssa all the details of his past, it was clear that he was at peace about it, and that pleased her to no end.

  “But if I ever do become a father,” Dakota continued, “if I ever do get the chance to see if I have a knack for parenting, it’ll be my grandfather I’ll model myself after. He was great to me, my brother, and my cousins. Just wonderful. Full of wisdom and patience.”

  Lyssa liked hearing him speak of the good memories of his childhood.

  “Oh, Grandfather disciplined us when we needed it,” he told her. “But for the most part, what I remember was that he loved us. And was proud of us. And he didn’t hesitate to show us exactly how he felt.”

  The massaging motion of his fingers on her foot stopped suddenly, and Lyssa could see that he was deep in thought.

  Softly he declared, “That’s the kind of father I want to be. Open with my feelings. Free with my love. I think kids can survive anything if they know they’re loved, don’t you?”

  She didn’t answer verbally. She only smiled.

  It was impossible for her to keep from thinking of her own lonely childhood. The places she’d been forced to live, the moving around, the constant worry about what she’d eat or how she’d acquire clothing or supplies for school. She’d felt isolated and at a distinct disadvantage.

  There had been nothing wonderful about her youth.

  “What kind of mother do you think you’ll make?”

  Dakota’s question aroused in her a huge doubt that sent her gaze drifting off across the lake. That very issue had filled her with fear ever since the day she’d discovered she was going to have a baby.

  She’d had no real role model. Oh, her mother had been around some of the time, but the woman hadn’t been much of a parent.

  “I can’t imagine loving my baby any more than I do right now.” She wasn’t surprised to find that her hands had fluttered their way to her tummy. The smile tugging at the corners of her mouth was sad, though. “And I can tell you that I know what kind of parent I don’t want to be.”

  She paused long enough to sigh. “I want my child to grow up happy, Dakota. And well cared for. I want my baby to always have a warm bed to sleep in, and good, nourishing food to eat. And I want to be there to hold him. And love him. And protect him.” She lifted her eyes to his. “Whatever it is we have to face.”

  He smiled at her, resuming the massage, but Lyssa knew his mind wasn’t really on the task of rubbing her foot.

  “I guess,” she felt compelled to add, “I’ll just have to wing it.”

  Seemingly without thought, Dakota’s hand slid upward and came to rest on her ankle. Heat spread up her leg in concentric waves and her breath caught and held.

  “When it comes right down to it, that’s exactly what most parents do, I would guess,” he said.

  He seemed not to notice what his touch was doing to her.

  “Funny, isn’t it?” he continued. “Parenting has to be the single most important duty a person can undertake, yet no training is offered. No formal education is available for the average person on how to care for children.”

  As he talked, his fingertips lingered beneath her trouser hem, slowly, inexplicably trailing to her Achilles’ tendon, then higher still, caressing the sensitive skin low on the back of her calf. Even though autumn chilled the mountain air, she felt flushed, uncomfortably warm as the embers of desire smoldered inside her.

  He seemed to realize suddenly that she hadn’t responded to anything he’d said. His chuckle faded, his words died as he became cognizant of what was simmering between them out there on the glassy water.

  In an instant, it seemed that the wind had been knocked out of him. His gaze locked with hers, fervor burning like white flames. His wide mouth parted, his tongue inadvertently skittering across his bottom lip. Lyssa fought the urge to loosen her sweater and she wouldn’t have been the least surprised if the lake began to seethe and simmer and set the boat pitching to and fro from the heat of this sudden, all-consuming ardor.

  His mouth formed soundless words. His fingers stilled on her calf. Time halted.

  Finally, he blinked. Swallowed. Inhaled deeply. And with what seemed a firm deliberateness he released his hold on her foot, guiding it back down to the floor of the rowboat.

  “We should get back,” he said, his voice raspy. He fumbled for the oars, giving the chore much more attention than it deserved.

  Lyssa should have felt discomfited. Once again the two of them had been taken unawares by that amazing allure. However, she didn’t feel the least bit ill at ease, even though that was clearly what Dakota suffered. Strangely, what she was battling was the urge to smile big and broad. She sensed that, for the first time, Dakota wasn’t out and out rejecting the attraction that pulsed between them. Instead, she got the impression that his reaction was more like… contemplation. As if he were wrestling with the idea of what it might mean were they to allow themselves to explore this astounding passion bubbling just below the surface.

  She’d been there, done that. And joy burst inside her to observe that he might finally be reaching that point, too.

  He put all his concentration into rowing them back to shore, and Lyssa didn’t break the silence. She understood that he needed the quiet. Needed this time to reflect and sort through what he was feeling.

  Lyssa spied the sleek black limousine long before they reached the shore. The sunshine glinted blindingly off the shiny chrome bumper, the tinted glass, even the fancy ornament on the hood, and her chest filled with a heavy dread.

  “He’s back,” she whispered. “Rodney’s back.”

  Dakota took a moment to look over his shoulder, but he went right back to propelling the boat toward the small dock.

  There was great strength in his green eyes when he looked at her.

  “It’s okay,” he said softly. “He can’t hurt you.”

  “I know. But he can make trouble for me.” Worry bit into her forehead. “And everyone around me. Lots of trouble. And he’ll enjoy doing it.” Her anxiety hitched up a notch as she admitted, “I’m terrified that he’ll use his fortune to somehow secure custody of our child.”

  There. It was out. The greatest fear weighing her down.

  “There’s no way we’ll let that happen. I have a cousin, Tristin. He’s a lawyer. A good one. He’ll be happy to help us, I’m sure.”

  Even though trepidation had her feeling quaky inside, she smiled. The way he’d phrased his comments was palpable confirmation that he was with her in this. Even though he knew the opponent to be both wealthy and powerful.

  She wasn’t alone in this mess. And that meant a lot. A whole lot.

  Her fingers where shaking as she looped the lanyard over the docking post. Dakota got out of the boat and then held his hand out to steady her exit. She wasn’t surprised—and felt terribly grateful—when he didn’t break contact with her, holding tightly to her hand as they closed the gap between them and the trouble that lay ahead.

  Rodney was getting out of the back seat of the car as she and Dakota set foot on the lakeshore.

  “I’ve come to take you home.” Her ex-husband’s tone was resolute, his eyes hard as steel.

  Her instinct was to wither, but Dakota put gentle pressure on her hand as assurance and promise that all would be just fine.

  Tipping up her chin, she said, “I am home. I told you that the last time you came. I’m not going back to California. I’m staying right here.” Feeling the need of a good verbal punch, she firmly added, “With my husband.”

  “Why would you want that—” he indicated Dakota with a small, dismissing toss of his head, his words smooth “—when I can give you everything your heart desires.”

  “What you give,” she told him, “comes with too high a price.”

  Rodney shrugged. “Everything has a price, Lyssa. Everything. I’ll bet what you think you have now… with him… came with a price, as well.”

  Lyssa’s insides shrank. Her marriage to Dako
ta had come with a price. Their relationship had started out as a mutual give-and-take. But that had changed sometime over the past several weeks. She’d gained a trusted friend in Dakota. She’d lost her heart to him. She’d discovered the true meaning of love.

  “I won’t let you denigrate what Dakota and I have,” she said boldly. “Because of him I now know about devotion. About loyalty. Love is wanting your mate to be happy, even when things aren’t going the way you’d like.”

  Shock jolted through her and her eyes went wide when she heard the silent implications in her statement. She couldn’t bring herself to look at Dakota.

  Under his breath, Rodney murmured, “That’s the biggest bunch of bull I’ve ever heard.”

  His rude proclamation offended her. “For some odd reason, Rodney, your attitude doesn’t surprise me.”

  His jaw tensed so tightly it looked painful.

  “Lyssa,” he said curtly, “I think I’ve been more than patient here. You’re carrying my baby. You ran off and hooked up with the first man you found. And you did it all without giving me any warning. Your objective has been successful. You got my attention. You’ve stirred my jealousy. Now—”

  “You are the most arrogant man I have ever met!”

  She pulled her hand from Dakota’s, balling her fingers into tight fists. “I did not run off to get your attention. I was not intending to make you jealous. Dakota and I are not merely ‘hooked up.’ We’re married, Rodney. Married. And that makes me unavailable to you.”

  “You’ll never be unavailable to me, Lyssa. Never.”

  There was a coaxing—an assuredness—in his tone that told Lyssa this man honestly felt he could acquire anything he wanted. Fury exploded in her head like glowing red fireworks.

  “We’re connected,” he said, his entire demeanor as smooth as the shiny black finish on the limousine he stood next to. “That baby you’re carrying will connect us forever.” He smiled, charm oozing from every pore. “You can’t get away from me. And I’ll soon have you admitting that you really never wanted that to begin with.”

  Evidently, he thought he was making progress, because his smile was sugary sweet.

  “You got confused is all, honey,” he crooned. “You just got a little mixed up. You’re mine, Lyssa. You’ll always be mine.”

  Her only thought was to pummel that smarmy grin right off his face, but when she made to move toward him, Dakota stopped her with a firm hand on her arm. She looked at him and his expression spoke volumes.

  As she studied his face, a calmness came over her. She felt so indebted to this man. He’d remained silent, allowing her to fight her own battle. But the moment he saw that she was losing control, that anger was urging her to do something she’d regret, he’d stepped in to help.

  She offered him the smallest of smiles, hoping he understood the gratitude she was feeling.

  Finally, she felt calm enough to say, “I don’t love you, Rodney. I never loved you. I only loved your money. I feel horrible that I did that to you. And I’m sorry. But that’s just the way things are.”

  His laugh was hearty. “Don’t feel badly about that, sweetheart,” he told her. “I love my money, too. That doesn’t mean we can’t make this work.”

  Control slipped from her clumsy grasp once again. “No one is this thick!”

  Something in her tone triggered Dakota to react. He turned his attention to Rodney, his body stance turning rigid. “This will stop. Now. Lyssa shouldn’t be upset. It isn’t good for her or the child.”

  Rodney leveled a smug look on Dakota, his chest puffing in a buffoonish manner. “My child. That’s my baby she’s carrying.”

  Dakota said, “That fact has never been disputed.”

  “Good,” the man said, emphasizing what he evidently thought was a triumph over the opposition. He directed his attention back onto Lyssa. “If you won’t come home for us, then you will come home for the baby’s sake.”

  Crossing her arms over her chest, she tipped up her chin mulishly. “I’ll say it one more time. I’m not going anywhere.”

  “You’ll come with me, damn it!”

  Rodney took two steps toward her, but Dakota planted his body firmly in front of Lyssa. Her ex stopped dead in his tracks.

  “You’re getting ready to cross a line,” Dakota ground out. “Think hard before you do.”

  It quickly became clear to her that it never entered Rodney’s head that his efforts to take what he considered his would be thwarted, that Dakota might take things to a physical level. Frustration and anger and confusion as to what he should do next darkened his features. Finally, Rodney turned toward the car.

  “Make her come home, Daddy,” he called.

  Lyssa reached up, covered her mouth with her fingers. Pity welled up in her when she heard the childish whine in Rodney’s voice. She watched as the rear door opened on the far side of the car, and the senior Gaines stepped out of the limo.

  Although he was small of stature, Lyssa knew that there wasn’t a more formidable man in the California corporate world. Samuel Gaines had been the ruin of many a businessman. Now, though, his smile was warm and frighteningly friendly.

  “Hello, Missy,” he greeted Lyssa.

  She cringed, feeling as if she’d walked, unawares, into a massive spider web. From the very first time she’d met Sam, he’d called the wives of all three of his sons Missy. Lyssa got the impression that either he couldn’t bother to remember the names of his daughters-in-law, or he didn’t feel they were worth having identities of their own.

  He closed the door and rounded the rear of the car, stopping only when he’d reached Rodney’s side.

  “I wanted to give my boy here every opportunity to solve his own problem.” Sam clapped his hand on his son’s shoulder.

  Just a moment before, Rodney may have acted cocky, but at least he’d seemed to have a backbone. Now that he stood beside his father, his shoulders rounded, his face crumpled, the result made him look pathetic. Lyssa was amazed that there had been any amount of money that had made him look attractive to her. Guilt rushed at her and she hated thinking that she’d seen the solution to her childhood filled with poverty in the Gaines family fortune. Well, that was one blunder she was simply going to have to live with. At least she’d learned something from the experience. Something important. No amount of money could buy happiness.

  “If there’s one thing I’ve learned,” Samuel said, stuffing his hands nonchalantly into the pockets of his trousers, “it’s that everyone has a price. What’s yours, Missy? What will it take for you to come home with us? A vacation villa in Italy? A yacht with all the trimmings? Hell, you name it, it’s yours.”

  She stepped up beside Dakota. “I don’t want anything you’ve got, Sam.”

  His friendly smile faded, the warning glistening in his eye meant to strike terror.

  “It’s not my practice to make an offer more than once. You turn me down and you’ll be making the mistake of a lifetime.”

  “I already made that,” Lyssa told him. “When I married your son. I don’t love him, Sam. So I got out.”

  “Love.” He bit out the word with disgust. “People put too much stock in mere emotion. Marriage is a business, pure and simple.” His grin was scary. “You’re in breach of contract, Missy.”

  She feared she might cry, but then Dakota reached over and slid his palm into hers. The strength that radiated from him was all she needed.

  “I’m not going anywhere, and that’s that. Don’t bother suggesting it again.” She looked at her ex. “I’m sorry if I hurt you, Rodney, but my mind’s made up. There’s no chance of us being together.”

  Silence hummed.

  Finally, Samuel said, “Well, then. It sure does seem like that’s that. So I guess you really do deserve what you’re about to get.”

  Something in his tone made the small hairs on the back of Lyssa’s neck stand on end, and she tried to no avail to stifle the cold fear that trickled down the full length of her spine one verteb
ra at a time.

  The elder man turned to his son. “I’d hoped she’d do right by you, boy,” he said, giving his shoulder a bolstering nudge. “For both her sake and for that of the child she’s carrying. But it looks like she’s not too concerned for your happiness.”

  He tossed Lyssa a scornful look, and in a flash his eyes turned granite hard. “I do have some information to help my boy deal with losing you. You’re not worthy to be part of the Gaines family, Missy. I know where you come from. I know what you are.”

  Dread dried up Lyssa’s throat until she felt as if someone had lighted a match and scorched the length of her esophagus. No. No! She wanted to scream.

  “Your mama was a prostitute.”

  She watched in horror as her former father-in-law’s mouth formed the words. But she felt as if she were hearing them from far off. She wished with all her heart that that’s where she was hearing them… from miles and miles away from this place. However, luck had never been that good to her.

  “She never even knew which one of her johns knocked her up,” he continued viciously. “You never knew your daddy, did you, Missy?”

  The muscles making it possible for her to swallow were paralyzed. Moving, speaking, thinking… all of these things were impossible.

  “You’re the product of filth.”

  Lyssa wanted to bury her face in her hands, to hide herself from the truth. Rodney’s pitiable posture transformed as he heard his father’s diatribe. Her ex-husband’s spine straightened and his face scrunched up into nothing short of revulsion.

  The fact that both Gaines men were now looking down their noses at her bothered her not one whit. What killed her inside was knowing that Dakota was discovering the truth about her, that her past was filled with nothing but trashy lewdness.

  “Why, it wouldn’t surprise me in the least, boy,” Samuel said to his son loudly, boldly, “if that baby in her belly isn’t even yours.”

  “Damn, Daddy,” Rodney whispered, “you’re probably right.” He raked Lyssa with a scathing look unmistakably articulating that the very sight of her nauseated him.