Royally Unprepared: Prince of Pout (Part 1) (Royal Misadventures Book 5)

by Elizabeth Stevens

  “I have a letter of my own to write.”

  “You should call her,” Max said.

  “I don’t want to.” Then Tati brightened. “Do you think she’ll hate me less now I’m set to be queen.”

  “Unless I abdicate,” I said, still having no idea who she was talking about.

  “Annie’s grandmother is a…character. And she’s not too fond of Tati.”

  “She’s a total bitch,” Tati scoffed. “Wait. She probably won’t come if it’s not Lia’s wedding.”

  Max laughed. “Kiddo, it’s a royal wedding. She’s coming.”

  Tati sat back against me with a huff. “I think I’d rather talk about these new rooms…” she grumbled.

  Chapter Nine

  Unsure exactly what to do, I bowed as best as sitting on the bed allowed me. I was then faced with three people laughing at me.

  “Shh,” Tati laughed waving her hand at the screen. “He’s not used to commoners.”

  “Well, we’re as common as they come,” Jenn promised, giving me an evil glare as she tugged her shorts a little further down her crossed legs. “And all that royal bullshit isn’t going to prevent me from opening up a can of whooparse on your royal behindus.”

  “Jenn!” Tati and Bea cried.

  “But really,” Bea then continued. “We are incredibly disappointed. Don’t you know you’re not just marrying her, your highness. You’re also marrying us.”

  “I am?” I asked.

  Even Tati nodded.

  “Oh yes.” Jenn pointed between her and Bea and the camera. “Package deal. You are stuck with us now, man.” She frowned further. “Even though we are super pissed off with you right now.”

  “I was going to put it in slightly less aggressive terms,” Bea whispered apologetically.

  “Well I shan’t–”

  “No,” Tati giggled. “Of course not.”

  “You, sir, decided it was a brilliant idea to basically tell her for the first time she was the one in front of the whole friggin’ country? What sort of brilliant plan was that?”

  I smirked, unable to be even jokingly annoyed with her. “It was unfortunately unavoidable.”

  “Unavoidable, my arse!”

  “I think you’ll find that’s my arse,” Bea said quietly with a small smile.

  Jenn paused for a moment to look at Bea in surprise, then turned back to the camera. “You could have at least texted her a head’s up!”

  Tati leant into me. “That’s what I said to Lia.”

  Jenn pointed. “See! See! How hard was a text?”

  I nodded, conceding. “In hindsight, that would have been better. However, I thought it would be best to do it in person and ran out of time before the announcement. I’ll admit I wasn’t expecting her to run up onto the stage.”

  “What was I supposed to do?” Tati asked.

  “It was very cute, though,” Bea added.

  Jenn hit her. “No. We’re angry with him!”

  Bea furrowed her brows. “Right. Sorry. Angry.” She nodded. “And, go.”

  Jenn nodded as well. “As I was saying. Poorly done, sir. Poorly. Done. Had I been there, you would have been the recipient of a swift kick to the family jewels. If you get my meaning.”

  I shook my head. “Oh no. We only bring those out on very rare occasions,” I told her, deadpan. “However, you’ll have your chance at the wedding. I’ll hold them nice and still for you.”

  Jenn’s face contorted as though she was trying not to smile and Bea barked a short laugh before Jenn elbowed her.

  “Angry,” she snapped.

  Bea pushed her glasses up her nose and levelled a firm stare on me. “Please don’t interpret our anger as us not being happy for the both of you.”

  “Oh, no,” Jenn said, brightening for a moment. “Super happy. Much congrats. Hugs all around when next we meet. Very well done, dudes.”

  “No,” Bea continued. “It’s just that as the best friends–”

  “And bridesmaids!” Jenn yelled.

  “And bridesmaids,” Bea agreed with a nod, “we really feel like we should have been informed before an entire country.”

  “Fucken’ A!” Jenn cried, throwing her arms up in the air.

  “Jennifer!” Bea admonished as she shoved her. “Let me finish!”

  “We rehearsed this bit,” Jenn said proudly as she resettled beside Bea.

  Tati gripped my hand tightly and watched the screen with a look of such happiness on her face that I felt terrible I hadn’t thought to notify her best friends earlier. But names of faceless people on the other side of the world had unfortunately got lost among everything else.

  Seeing the three of them like this only cemented in my mind that I needed to find a way to bring Jenn and Bea to Gallyr as soon as possible. Tati had mentioned them and I remembered her saying how she wasn’t going to see them for a while. But in my belief in doing one’s duty at the detriment to one’s wishes, I had failed to grasp just how much she was really missing them.

  “In light of your application, supplication and newfound happiness, we wish to report that you will not reside in the dog house for an extended period and we would be delighted to continue your position of best friend,” Bea itoned.

  Tati snorted, leaning on me as she laughed. “Brilliant. Well,” she sat up straighter on the bed, “I would be honoured of course to continue my position. However, it is my unfortunate displeasure to inform you that the roles of bridesmaids are…not a certainty.”

  Jenn and Bea both yelled out and Tati hunched in on herself with an apologetic grimace on her face. She held her hands out and nodded.

  “I know! I know!” she told them, then nudged me. “You tell them.”

  “Me?”

  “Yes. Do tell us, oh lofty prince,” Jenn teased. “Why are we not guaranteed bridesmaids in the wedding we’ve been planning since we were seven?”

  “You’ve been–?” I started.

  But Jenn clicked her fingers at their camera. “Focus, your highness. We’ll tell you all about adorably gangly baby Anya later.”

  I smirked as Tati groaned, “Can we not?”

  Bea shrugged. “We don’t make the rules.”

  “We just follow them,” Jenn finished. “Now, deets!”

  I sighed. “Traditionally the bridal party is determined by the royal’s number of siblings.”

  “Perfect!” Jenn cried happily. “Two for two!”

  “Lia,” Bea hissed to her.

  Bea obviously knew what was coming as Jenn’s next outcry was stifled to merely a “Fu–!” with a swiftly placed hand.

  “Stop swearing in front of royalty,” Bea snapped. “Okay. So tradition dictates two?”

  I nodded. “Yes. Although, Tati and I are coming up with alternatives.”

  “Just make the wedding like two years away and get your parents to make another spare heir,” Jenn stated, waving her hand dismissively.

  I smirked as Tati snorted, “That may have been one of them.”

  Jenn nodded. “Perfect.”

  “The simpler solution,” I said slowly, “is finding a third to stand with me.”

  “Have you got any friends, Dmitri?” Jenn asked and Bea whacked her. “What?”

  “What about Mikelson?” Tati asked and, when I looked at her, she was looking at me with such a mischievous grin that I wrapped my arm around her and shook my head.

  “Who’s Mikelson?” Jenn asked, leaning forward and using Bea’s knee to stop her falling. “And am I interested?”

  I shrugged. “I could not tell–”

  “Probably. But, no!” Tati cried, pointing at the screen.

  Bea laughed and Jenn crossed her arms in a huff.

  “Why not?”

  “How’s Rosie?” Tati asked.

  Jenn looked out of the corner of her eye. “I dunno. I think we’re just–”

  “Jennifer!” Bea and Tati both yelled and I jumped a
t the suddenness of it.

  “Bad girl!” Tati chastised.

  Bea nodded. “She’s doing it again.”

  “You know?”

  “Hello! Person who told an entire continent she was engaged before her best friends?” Jenn said then blinked. “No. Wait. Whose side am I on?”

  “I think we’re all not on your side?” I guessed.

  “Hang on! I’m allowed to second guess how much I like a person or stop liking them or whatever!” Jenn said defensively.

  Tati nodded. “Yeah. But you don’t get to chase someone to the ends of the world, convince them that their current relationship–”

  “Though, to be fair,” Bea interjected. “Not a great relationship.”

  Tati nodded again. “True. But still, you did all that and now you’re having second thoughts?”

  “Do you…? Should I not be here for this?” I asked them.

  Jenn waved a hand. “Nah, you’re good, dude. And we’re all allowed to second guess.”

  “Except you. Because wedding,” Bea added, pointing to us.

  Jenn nodded. “Yes. That. But the rest of us!”

  “Jennifer,” Tati said very clearly. “Of course you’re allowed to change your mind. But you don’t get to basically convince someone you’re in love with them then turn around and decide you’re less than indifferent.”

  “I did n–”

  “You did.”

  “When did this become about me. I thought we were telling off Prince Charming?”

  “Can’t we do both?” Bea asked.

  “No. We get one berating per call. Those are the rules. Those have always been the rules. And for once it’s not my turn!”

  “I can hang up and call you back if that makes you feel better?” Tati said.

  There was a knock on the door.

  “Yes?” Tati called.

  “Who is it?” Jenn asked, leaning forward again as though that would help her see.

  Nikolai poked his head into the room. “Apologies for interrupting. My lady, your father wishes to speak to you.”

  “Is that Nikolai?” Bea asked as Jenn yelled, “HI NIKOLAI!” so loudly the speakers started buzzing.

  Nikolai inclined his head. “Ladies.”

  Tati sighed. “All right. I’d best go.”

  “Love yooou!” Bea and Jenn chorused.

  Tati reached forwards with a, “Bye, chicas,” but Jenn stopped her.

  “Give us a minute with his royal highness, yeah babes?”

  Tati looked at me in question.

  I inclined my head to her. “I assure I’ve faced worse.”

  “Oh, you wanna bet?” Jenn huffed, but she was smiling.

  “Go. I’ll see you later.”

  Tati hovered for a moment, then nodded. “Okay.” She pointed to the screen. “Behave!”

  “Scout’s honour,” Bea said as Jenn cried, “No promises.”

  Tati left with Nikolai and I pulled the laptop onto my lap.

  “Is this the part where you promise to separate me from my…family jewels if I hurt her?” I asked them ruefully.

  Jenn opened and closed her mouth, her eyes narrowing in suspicion as Bea nodded.

  “Long and short of it, yes.” Bea said.

  Jenn deflated a bit. “It’s less fun if you know it’s coming.”

  I scrubbed a hand over my chin. “Would it help if I not only allowed it, but gave you my permission?”

  Jenn crossed her arms again and frowned. “Maybe.”

  “I’ll take it,” Bea said. “I suppose you’ve got things to do, too?”

  I smirked. “What could be more important than getting to know my fiancée’s best friends?”

  Jenn wriggle happily. “Now that you put it like that…”

  “Hang on.” Bea was frowning now. “What does Max want with her at…like one in the morning?”

  “Ah. I believe he was trying to get hold of Annabel’s grandmother?”

  Jenn’s face dropped into absolute horror and Bea grimaced.

  “Oh dear.” Bea looked at Jenn. “Okay. You’re going to be needed for the aftermath.”

  “The bitch!” Jenn hissed vehemently.

  “Is she really that bad?” I asked.

  “You know that Amanda Schuller chick you were gallivanting about with?”

  “I would not have called it galli–”

  “Irregardless.”

  “Not a word,” Bea breathed as she looked to the ceiling.

  Jenn waved her hand. “Take her and that marquise woman, mush them together and add a healthy dose of…?” She ran out of steam in what looked like confusion.

  “That fairy tale or whatever you told Anya at the Winter Festival,” Bea finished.

  I frowned. “The Snow Queen?”

  Jenn nodded. “Her! But like if her mission was instead of killing men and eating their hearts, she wanted to grind her great-granddaughter into a puddle of self-worthlessness.”

  “I don’t think that’s a thing,” Bea whispered quickly. “But anyway, the gist isn’t wrong. Just, go wherever they are and get ready for a night of Angry Anya.”

  I nodded. “I know her well.”

  Jenn and Bea both smirked and I suspected they had been privy to many of Tati and my encounters, both good and bad.

  “Take care of her for us,” Jenn warned.

  I nodded again. “I will.”

  “Good.” Bea smiled, pushing her glasses up her nose again. “Well, have fun with the rest of your interviews and we’ll probably talk to you again sometime.”

  “Yes. I imagine you will.”

  “One day we might even meet you.” Jenn looked at me pointedly. “Before the wedding.”

  I grinned. “I will send you my email address and you can let me know when your holidays are this year.”

  Jenn beamed but Bea elbowed her with a, “We are not affording a trip to Europe.”

  “Max is not the only one with access to a private plane,” I told them.

  They both looked at me in awe. “Really?”

  I nodded. “If you’d like. I know Tati misses you. Consider it compliments of the crown.”

  “You’re on, dude!” Jenn said, then rolled herself off the bed and the camera wobbled violently.

  Bea leant forward with a smile. “It’s been very nice to meet you, Dmitri.”

  “Likewise, Bea.”

  She ended the chat and I closed Tati’s laptop before heading down to see if there was anything I could do to help with the great-grandmother situation.

  Chapter Ten

  I had been prepared for a lot during my childhood and my adolescence. I was born to be the next ruler of a country, there was a mountain of expectations and obligations riding on my shoulders. But even with all my preparation, I was not prepared for the deluge of post-engagement interviews that hit us.

  I was not ready to have reporters cavalierly questioning my choice – to my face and in front of Tati – as though they legitimately had any right to know anything about my life.

  But that was life in the public eye. That was the life I’d been born into. I knew this. Even if I had never really had to live it before – even if I’d never had anything in my personal life worth them gossiping about – I knew this.

  “Stop fidgeting,” Tati hissed to me as she nudged me gently.

  “How much longer?” I asked her.

  She turned a smile on me. “You’re asking me?”

  I nodded. “I am asking you.”

  A small snort of laughter escaped her, then she glared at me as though it was my fault for making her laugh. “I don’t know. Annelise and Gunter are in makeup so hopefully only a few minutes.”

  I looked around, unable to stop myself frowning. We’d had seven interviews the afternoon before and the Good Morning Show was merely the next in the long line of obligations. I was beginning to realise that, even when I had what I wanted, I was still going to be
saddled with obligations.

  “Your highness. My lady. I’m told we’re on in five minutes.” Felicia hovered more awkwardly than Alaina would have but less awkwardly than she could have. “If you’ll head over to the couches, please?”

  “Of course. Which one’s for us?” Tati asked as we followed Felicia.

  It was one of those times I was inordinately pleased that I wasn’t required to wear heels to look appropriate. Tati seemed slightly more easy-going, but Felicia took about three or four steps to every one of mine.

  Tati was being polite and nice and charming to everyone so I felt I could get away with my usual face of professionalism. Mother had tutted at me the night before about how I was hardly looking like a man in the first throes of love and newly engaged, and I’d reminded her I’d spent a great deal of my life feeling one way and looking another. I knew she’d wanted to argue, but she’d been unable to come up with a reasonable argument.

  “The orange one. The blue one is for Annelise and Gunter,” Felicia answered.

  “They certainly don’t want their guests to look better than them,” I muttered under my breath as I unnecessarily straightened my jacket lapels.

  Tati looked back at me with a slight smirk as one of the staff helped her onto the set. As soon as she let go of his hand, she reached for mine. I locked eyes with her as I took it and stepped up to join her.

  For a moment, all the outside circus melted and it was just her. It was just us. I could hardly pull her to me and show her how I was feeling, but judging by the look in her eyes she understood and she agreed.

  I took a deep breath and stretched my neck, willing myself to regain my full composure. That full composure that seemed to have been missing since she’d first walked into the room back in November.

  A part of me had thought when I gave into my feelings for her that it would all be easier. I could touch her whenever I wanted, I could kiss her whenever I wanted, I could laugh with her whenever I wanted. But a larger part of me had a brilliant time berating that smaller part. Unless we were behind closed doors, we were in the public eye and anything we said or did would be media fodder.

  I had to put my faith in the hope it wouldn’t have to be like this forever.

  Felicia sighed happily beside us with a breathy, “Aw,” and the moment was broken.