Shattered Dawn (Fallen Guardians Book 5)

by Georgia Lyn Hunter

“But—”

  “No buts, Shadow. This is it.” He didn’t want to hear about the crap still hanging over them. The universe knew it wasn’t going to disappear easily, like some bad dream.

  And no damn spell his mother cast would get in his way. How he felt about Shadow, this connection with her, nothing else mattered. Nothing and no one.

  Shadow shifted on his lap, and his semi-erect cock inside her hardened. Hell, he wanted her again, but she had to be sore. He pressed his lips to her brow and gently moved her away, his dick slipping free from her snug warmth. She grimaced.

  Nik grabbed the towel he’d used earlier from the side of the bed and gently cleaned her.

  “Wait-wait, I can do that.”

  “So can I.”

  Faint color seeped into her cheeks. She rolled her eyes, got hold of the towel end, and wiped his dick.

  Nik snorted—but hell, her touch was stirring him damn bad. “Not helping there, moró.”

  She laughed, the sound enfolding him like a hug.

  He tossed the towel down and lay back, settling her in the crook of his arm. Her warm, feminine body aligned against his side. “You okay?”

  She lifted those gorgeous eyes to him and smiled. “Yes…”

  Then she rested her cheek on his chest again. Her fingers absently caressed the barbell piercing on his nipple before trailing along his pecs to the tonal runes sweeping over his shoulder.

  “Shadow,” he said quietly. “How did you not know you were a virgin?” She’d seemed more surprised than he’d been at finding out something so fundamental.

  She lifted a shoulder. “Because I don’t remember my life before five years ago.”

  “What?” Nik grasped her face, making her look at him. “What do you mean?”

  A sigh escaped her. “I only know what Aba told me. He said he found me hiding out in the back alley of their garage behind the huge dumpster, and that there were men chasing me. He helped conceal me. A few days later, the horrible attack by the blood demons occurred.” Her fingers stopped their exploring. “Nate said it was probably the trauma of the assault that caused my memory loss. It seems I never told them why I was running, and I had nothing on me. No identification, just the clothes I wore…”

  Anger rolled through him that someone would hunt her. “Those men never came back looking for you?”

  “I don’t know. I never left the garage. I was struggling to adapt to what I’d changed into…” She swallowed. “In the early days, those demons I fed off, they would follow me. Staying at the garage wasn’t safe anymore.”

  Nik gently stroked her back, pulling his fury deep into his gut. “So Shadow isn’t your real name?”

  Her brow creased. “I think it is. It’s what Nate and Aba called me.”

  “How long did you stay with…Nate?”

  He knew he shouldn’t dislike the male, but he hated hearing the devotion in her voice every time she mentioned his name. Yeah, he was a possessive bastard, and he didn’t care.

  “Nate wasn’t always around. He’d stay for a while, then leave and repeat the pattern.” Her brow scrunched. “Aba called him a restless soul… Anyway, I lived at the garage for a couple of months before I left. Aba wasn’t happy, but he understood why I couldn’t stay on. Nate was…upset, I guess. But he didn’t say anything. Being underground was safer…” Her voice hitched, and a sliver of pain darted through him—hers. And Nik knew why. Eddi.

  “We’ll find who’s responsible for Eddi’s death, moró,” he said quietly, dragging the covers over them and mentally shutting the window against the early morning breeze. “I am sorry for what you went through, but you have me now.”

  She pressed her lips to his pecs, didn’t say anything, her fingers back to tracing over his chest again. This time, she followed the slight ridges of the multiple scars he’d hidden beneath the ink, evidence of his time in Tartarus. Nik gently drew her hand away from the hated reminder.

  “Nik?” She suddenly pushed up, eyes dark and anxious. “I’m sorry about earlier, for getting upset—for hurting you.”

  He sat, too, the covers pooling around his waist. “Never apologize for how you had to survive. You didn’t ask for what happened to you. I admit I did not react well when you told me about your symbionts’ needs.”

  “I guess you’re a better person than me.” A wry smile curved her mouth. She pushed back her heavy fall of hair. “Because I sure as heck would have wanted to kill the woman had you been the one who needed to feed.”

  “Shadow…” He shut his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose, then he laid it all out. “I’m not good with sharing, and I don’t know what will happen when the time comes. But we’ll talk about this later.” He drew her down to the bed, settling her against him once more. Unable to stop touching her, he stroked her back. “You’ve been through a helluva lot these past few days. Get some rest.” He pressed his mouth to her crown.

  Out of habit, he threw his arm over his eyes, and instead of the constant battering in his head and the ever-present darkness and pain inside him, only a quiet remained.

  Nik inhaled deeply and savored this peace, one only she gave him.

  Chapter 17

  The odd stillness within him jolted Nik awake. Midday sunlight flooded his bedroom. He frowned, taking stock of himself…no rioting in his head, just unending quietness. Memories stirred, and what occurred last night flood him. Shadow. But her warm body wasn’t next to his.

  His gaze rushed to the other side of his huge bed. He found her there, asleep, and almost hanging off the edge, legs and torso uncovered, a corner of the sheet barely concealing her delectable bottom.

  His heart bumped hard in gratitude that he had her. He reached across and gently drew her back to him.

  A sigh escaped her, then she mumbled something that sounded like “too hot.” But she snuggled closer anyway, her palm moving over his abs, her right leg sliding over his as if searching for every inch of coolness on his skin. “Mmm, you feel so good.”

  And his dick rose to attention. Hell.

  A brush of angelic power scraped his senses and grew stronger. No, not Michael. He never played the asshole and intruded. Damn Lore.

  “What is that sensation?” Shadow murmured, burrowing her face in his chest.

  “A pest. Go back to sleep.” Pressing a kiss to her head, Nik eased away from her and got up. He grabbed the used towel from the floor and headed for the bathroom. Lore could wait a moment longer.

  After a quick shower, he dried off and pulled on black sweats. Feet bare, he walked out of the bedroom, heading to the stairwell leading downstairs.

  “You sleep like the dead.” Lore’s voice reached him as Nik reached the last few steps to the ground floor. “I could have robbed you blind in the time it took you to get here.”

  Nik stopped in his tracks. Sleep. The angel’s words hit him with the impact of a sledgehammer to the head.

  He’d slept.

  In all his millennia on this realm, after being freed from Tartarus, he’d never slumbered, not with the dark souls’ ruckus inside him. His chest tightened, and he rubbed a hand over his sternum. Shadow gave him this freedom.

  He wanted to go back to her and not deal with whatever had Lore demanding his presence.

  His mind racing a mile a minute, Nik jogged down the last three steps into the circular, sunken seating area where the angel stood, and faltered to a halt, blinded by the dazzling pink that had taken over what used to be the living room—

  “What the hell is this?” Nik swept his arm over the pink couches, armchairs…even the new glass coffee table sported pink freakin’ legs.

  Lore shrugged. “Your female did not approve the white I chose. Michael suggested something called Google for assistance.” He waved a new cell. “Pink is supposedly a female color. Did you know just how informative this Google is about most things?”

  Theós. Nik dragged his gaze away from the garish pink and glared at Lore. “I don’t care, just change it back.”

/>   Barely suppressing a growl, he strode for the kitchen, shoved the door open, and made straight for the espresso machine. To deal with Lore, he needed the caffeine boost. The aroma of fresh coffee brewing permeated the air. He poured some into a mug, and as he sipped the rich, dark beverage, his gaze fell on a plastic container with something freshly baked, the aroma mouthwatering. It had a sticky note on the lid. Now, the fresh coffee made sense.

  He picked up the message.

  Brought food and stocked the fridge.

  Left Shadow’s backpack on the chair.

  -H

  “You do not approve of the change in décor?” Lore asked, entering the kitchen.

  Nik swallowed more espresso and expelled a weary breath. He far preferred being in bed with Shadow, taking a little time for themselves before life got in their way, over having to deal with a frustrating, by-the-book angel.

  “No, I don’t.” Nik rubbed his temple and faced Lore, who seemed determined to bug the hell out of him. The angel lounged on one of the mismatched wooden chairs near the wall. “Shadow can make any changes she wants.”

  “As you prefer.” Lore folded his arms over his chest as if settling in for an extended stay, watching Nik contemplatively. “Why a mortal?” he asked. “You and the other Guardians seem to gravitate toward a frail species. Do you not have goddesses in your pantheon to choose from?”

  This was why he disturbed him?

  Nik narrowed his eyes. “Watch it. That’s my mate you’re disparaging.” The urge to shatter the angel’s complacency took hold. “Can’t wait until some human female shoots you down on your ass.” Yeah, he was a dick, he didn’t care.

  Lore cocked his head, faint lines creasing his brow. “Why would that happen? I’m in service to my Heavenly Father. Humans hold no interest for me except for the duties I must perform.”

  Father… The word left a sour taste in Nik’s mouth. While the human God was all benevolent, Eros was no father to him. But he’d work with what he had since it suited him. “You do know who my sire is, right?”

  “The gods don’t interest me.”

  The sanctimonious prick. “Oh, you should be interested in this particular deity,” Nik drawled, taking a sip of coffee and making the angel wait. “He’s an old one, the God of Love. An arrow—a touch from him— and you’re a goner for some mortal female.”

  Lore glided to his feet, still stoic as ever, all six feet span of wings rustling open as if to emphasize precisely what he was. “I will take my leave,” he said coolly, but his eyes flashed like green stones. “I have a tutoring session at the castle with the Empyrean’s mate. I shall be back at sundown…” In a silver swirl of sparks, he vanished.

  The door opened, and Shadow ambled inside, swamped in one of his t-shirts, revealing a glimpse of her short skirt and a tempting expanse of thighs. Hell, he wanted them wrapped around him again, his hips, around his head—his gaze met hers.

  Her little smile lit up his heart. “Hi…” she said softly, faint pink tinging her cheeks. “I, um, don’t have any clothes.” She fingered the hem of his gray tee. “I borrowed another shirt.”

  She looked too damn seductive in it. “It suits you.”

  Her smile broke into laughter. “Sure, they do. It’s only so you can see my legs.”

  “There is that.” His mouth twitched. Nik set his mug down and drew her into his arms, her body cool from her shower, and she smelled of his soap. Her loose, damp hair brushed his bare chest like a million stroking fingers as she hugged him. His entire being settled by just holding her. Hell, somehow between the hours of him finally making love to her and claiming her as his, it felt as if she’d seeped into the very heart of him.

  He pressed his lips to her neck. “You didn’t have to get up.”

  “I wanted to see this place during daylight.” She eased back and took his mug from the counter and sipped. “Ugh.” She scrunched her nose, setting it down again. “This thing tastes worse than the potion you gave me.”

  At her grumble, he shook his head. “I’ll get some tame coffee going for you.”

  She huffed out a laugh. “Nah, water will do for now.”

  Frowning, Nik crossed to the fridge near the door. With the kind of life she lived, he knew she put eating last on her list. Yeah, that would change. He got out the orange juice and poured some into a glass, then handed her the tumbler. “We have food, and there’s cake, too—so eat. Here.” He opened the container.

  She peeked at the cupcakes and muffins, then selected the latter. As she bit into the crumbly blueberry cake, he drawled, “You’ll need your strength.”

  Color suffused her face as his meaning sank in. She scrunched her nose and drank some juice. Smiling, he leaned against the counter and sipped his coffee.

  Muffin finished, she drank more of her juice and set the glass down. She stepped to him and placed one palm on his chest. He could sense the gentle pull of her symbionts now that he was aware of them, and he covered her hand with his.

  “You’re okay now.” She cast him a soft smile. “I don’t sense any darkness in you. If you need me, let me know.”

  His entire being tensed, and he had to force out the words. “I won’t. Not anymore. Those souls in me were from my time in Tartarus. It seems they attracted the souls of the scourges I killed in this world…” He exhaled roughly, then added, “You’ve stopped the cycle completely by removing the malignant ones.”

  Shadow’s heart sank, the hope she harbored dying. Despite everything, she’d prayed he’d be all she needed, and she wouldn’t have to stalk clubs again.

  God. She wanted to shut her eyes in despair when what he said had her frowning. “Tartarus?” she repeated, remembering something Aba had mentioned long ago. “Is that the place where immortals are imprisoned?”

  His mouth tightened, his expression morphing to stone as if isolating himself from whatever it was.

  A chill stole over her. “Nik, how did you end up having those souls trapped inside you?” she asked him again.

  He leaned against the counter, clenching the granite edge with fingers gone bone-white. “Tartarus is where I, along with the other Guardians, except for Aethan, were incarcerated for five centuries.”

  “Why?” The word burst free, her brain whooshing inside her skull as if all the blood had drained free.

  “It was our punishment for failing in our duties,” he said, tone flat. “We didn’t protect the Goddess of Life as we were charged to. Inara was young and powerful, and she had to be shielded at all costs. We messed up. The bastard, Lucifer, and his horde abducted her, leaving behind a bloody massacre.”

  Shadow stared wide-eyed at him. “Lucifer, the fallen angel?”

  “Yeah.” His lips thinned. “After judgment was given at the Gates of the Gods, we were found guilty of negligence and stripped of our powers, our godhood, and we fell through a portal…”

  As if unable to remain still, he grabbed his mug from the table, crossed to the espresso machine, and poured more coffee. “When I came to in that subterranean hellhole, I found myself alone in a place of eternal darkness, mist, and unrelenting cold,” he said so softly Shadow was grateful for her heightened hearing. Still, she took a step closer as he continued.

  “Unseen entities flung me into raids for souls to feed their endless appetite. Whatever those things had done to me, the dark souls slammed into me the moment I appeared amidst them—there was no escaping that shit.”

  Shadow frowned and knew it wasn’t as straightforward as he made it sound. She’d seen images of it down in that monk’s cell. “So you released them after?”

  Hollow laughter. “You don’t release them. Those entities are always after the gore, the brutality, and the pain they could get before consuming the souls. I was nothing but a vessel…” His gaze lowered to his mug. “Weak and powerless. They could do whatever the hell they wanted. It was all about the torment.”

  “But why?” she breathed. “You did what they demanded.”

  “That�
�s not how it works in Tartarus. Only with suffering is the end more satisfying.” A nerve pulsed furiously on his jaw. “Those entities either sucked them out from my mouth—and it felt as if my entire insides were being yanked from my gullet—or, they simply tore me open and fed. Death was a short-lived respite.”

  Death? Oh, dear God. “I saw,” she whispered, feeling as if her own sternum had been split open. “Last night. I saw them leave you. Your chest ripped open. Blood everywhere.”

  He shook his head. “It wasn’t real.”

  “Don’t brush it off, Nik. I saw those ghostly images, and I felt your agony.”

  When he remained silent, she asked softly, “How did you escape?”

  “No one escapes that hellhole once condemned there.” Haunted eyes finally met hers. “There was a shift in its planes or something, and I was in the midst of absorbing souls when, for whatever reason, I was thrown out of there—”

  “And the souls remained in you through the millennia?”

  His mouth thinned. “I know your symbionts fed on them, but the sensation of it, the memory of it, it’s all too fresh in my mind—especially when you lived with a fucking curse like that for nearly four thousand years!”

  Her mouth dropped open in shock. “Four—”

  “I need to get outta here.” He dropped his mug on the counter, coffee spilling.

  “Nik—” She hastily grasped his forearm, heart pounding, praying he wouldn’t storm off. He didn’t. He just stood there like a statue, a tic working his jaw. “I’m so sorry,” she whispered, her soul hurting for him, for what he’d endured. Just because she’d removed those dark souls, it didn’t mean the horror was over for him. “No one should have to endure that kind of punishment. Not even for a second.”

  God, she recalled the pain—the torment he’d suffered last night while locked in that cell—an agony he’d experienced for thousands of years. An imprisonment he never entirely escaped until she consumed those insidious souls.

  Silence reigned for several seconds. His chest rose and fell, then his callused hand covered hers, and he drew her to him. Shadow slid her palms up his chest, finally understanding the scars hidden beneath his many tattoos. And she thought it was because of his job. She pressed her lips to them.