Surrendering to Us

by Chelsea M. Cameron

  “I just had lunch with Violet and she told me something you need to know.” His attention immediately narrowed and snapped on me.

  I closed the door and sat down.

  “She said the Board wanted to bribe her to become friends with me and then spy on me, and you by association.” He was silent for a moment, digesting my words. They didn’t appear to be going down easy.

  “I thought as much. She’s not the first, and I don’t think she’ll be the last. This has got to stop,” he said, shaking his head.

  “Why not have them arrested? I’m pretty sure they’ve broken a law or two.” Or twelve.

  “That kind of thing is very hard to prove without recordings, or a paper trail, and they’ve been very careful to cover their tracks and never say anything outright that could incriminate them. They know the laws and how to walk along the edges and toe the line, but not cross it.” I had a whole string of words I wanted to scream, but they definitely weren’t appropriate in a work setting, or in front of my father.

  “Well, I think I have her on my side now, so we don’t have to worry about Violet. Who else have they gotten to?” Dad just shook his head at that.

  “The less you know about that, the better. Like I said, I’m handling it. You just make sure they really haven’t gotten their hooks into Miss Cooper, but just in case, play it close to the vest and always trust your gut, Rory.” His classic advice that was right for every situation.

  “I will. Sorry to be the bearer of bad news.”

  “You’re never the bearer of bad news. It’s news I already knew, and it’s always good to see my girl.” My heart got melty so I went and gave him a hug before walking at a more normal pace back to my desk and telling Lilia that everything was under control and she could go to lunch.

  I thought about calling Lucah and telling him about everything with Violet, but I decided to wait and tell him after work. I hoped he would be pleased that the two of us were friendly. He probably would not be pleased that she’d been turned into a pawn slash spy by the Board. Or maybe I shouldn’t tell him that part.

  “So Violet and I had lunch today,” I said as we hopped into a cab to avoid walking to the T station in the rain that threatened to fall from the sky at any moment. As soon as the door shut and Lucah told the driver the address, drops pattered on the windshield.

  “You did? How did that go?” He turned in his seat to face me.

  “Uh, surprisingly well. I think we’re friends now. And don’t look so skeptical,” I said.

  “What? I wasn’t skeptical. I’m just surprised that all it took was one lunch for you to bury the hatchet.” The rain started coming down harder, sheeting against the windows and blurring the world outside.

  “What is this hatchet business? I didn’t hate her.”

  “I know, I know. It was the best metaphor I could come up with. Sorry. So, what caused this sudden flowering of friendship?” I bit my lip and considered as the cabbie weaved in and out of traffic and people rushed for cover, or popped open umbrellas.

  “She was really open and honest with me about some things, and I value that, so I decided to put everything else aside. I was being petty and immature. She’s also really funny. Why didn’t you tell me she was funny?”

  My question left him floundering for a moment.

  “I didn’t want to talk about her because I didn’t want to make you upset. That might have been petty and childish on my part. So I tried to avoid ever discussing her.” I took his hand and folded our fingers together.

  “You don’t have to do that. I’m interested. I want to know what you were like back then. I’ve seen pictures but I want to know. Don’t you want to know what I was like as a teenager?”

  He squeezed my hand.

  “I most definitely want to know what you were like as a teenager. It must be much more interesting than what I was like. My adolescence was boring. Very boring. Nothing to talk about.” I rolled my eyes as the cabbie pulled up to our building.

  “This is going to suck,” I said, staring at the rain.

  “Here,” Lucah said, shucking off his jacket. We were both going to have to dash. Not that it mattered, because we were just going home. I could change once we got inside, but I disliked getting rained on, even if it was only for a minute. Lucah handed me his jacket to use as a makeshift umbrella and then got out, dashed to my door, opened it, and dragged me across the short distance to the front door of our building.

  I stayed dry, but him, not so much. His hair dripped on his face, and his shirt was nearly see-through. I wasn’t complaining. It was a good look for him.

  I couldn’t keep my hands off him in the elevator, so it was a good thing we were alone. By the time we got the door unlocked, I had one arm out of his shirt and he was working on my buttons.

  “Get a fucking hotel room,” said a voice that made us both freeze, mid-clothes tearing. Oops. I’d pretty much forgotten about Ryder. From the look on Lucah’s face, so had he.

  Lucah cleared his throat and let go of my shirt, straightening up as he put his arm back in his sleeve while I tried to re-button my shirt. Lucah had lipstick smeared on his mouth, and I’d ravaged his hair as well.

  “Look, I know you guys are all over each other, but please, do it when I’m not here.” There was just one problem. He was always here. That wasn’t his fault, because both his therapist and Lucah didn’t think a job was right for him at this point, but he needed something to do. Preferably something that got him out of the apartment so Lucah and I could fuck each other.

  “Sorry, Ryder,” I said, finally getting my buttons done, and readjusting my jacket.

  “Whatever, it’s fine. I’m going over to Sloane’s.” I happened to know she wasn’t home from work yet. She’d texted me that she wasn’t going to be able to do dinner, and to order out and start without her.

  “Do you have a key?” I asked.

  “Yeah, she gave me one and said I could hang out there any time.” Uh, she did? That was news to me. It also seemed like something she should have discussed with Lucah at least.

  “You don’t have to leave, Ryder,” Lucah said as Ryder headed for the door.

  “No, no. Someone should be getting laid in this apartment, and if it can’t be me, then go ahead.” He walked out and shut the door.

  “I think I’m going to go deal with that,” Lucah said, brushing something off my jacket. “I will be right back.”

  I let him go and went to slump on the couch. I’d thought the Ryder thing was beginning to settle, but every time I thought that, something else happened. Plus, we had yet to tell him he was coming with us to my parents’ house. Lucah thought it was best to spring it on him at the last minute. I disagreed, but he knew Ryder better than I did.

  Maybe we could bring Sloane with us. Mom and Dad would love to see her, and she might be able to keep Ryder on a leash.

  I closed my eyes for a minute and debated about going to see if Lucah and Ryder had killed each other, but decided to stay out of it. The brother dynamic was one I wasn’t all that familiar with, not having any brothers of my own.

  The door opened a few minutes later, and I propped myself up to see who it was. Lucah. He didn’t have a black eye, so that was good. He didn’t have Ryder with him, either.

  “How did it go? Did you solve your issues by wrassling it out?” Lucah laughed at me.

  “No, we haven’t done that since we were kids. And I’m pretty sure he could take me now. We were just talking about him getting out of the house more. I’ve kind of had him under house arrest, and I think it’s time to loosen the cuffs a little.”

  I completely agreed. There was no reason why Ryder shouldn’t be allowed to leave the house every now and then. I was kind of surprised that he hadn’t already. Maybe he was trying to be good.

  “I, uh, also told him about Sunday.”

  “What was his reaction?”

  “He used ‘fuck’ as several different parts of speech.” Big shocker. “But he said he’d
come, so I think it should work out. I was thinking that maybe we could bring Sloane with us since he seems to behave the best when she’s around. Not that that’s saying much, but still.”

  I rested my arms on his shoulders.

  “This is why I love you. Because I was thinking the exact same thing.”

  “Weird. Maybe our brains are absorbing each other’s thoughts. Pretty soon, we won’t even need words. We’ll just KNOW what the other is thinking.” That prospect was both terrifying and kind of cool sounding. I didn’t think it was really possible outside of science fiction, but stranger things had happened.

  “So, are you thinking what I’m thinking?” he said, his eyes scanning slowly up and down my body.

  “I think I have an idea.”

  “Why is your fucking house so fucking big?” Ryder said on Sunday when we arrived at my house for dinner.

  “Why the fuck do you keep saying fuck?” Sloane said, smacking him on the arm. “This isn’t the kind of fucking house that you can just say fuck in whenever you want.”

  “Okay, can we pause the fuck talk for a few hours?” Lucah said. “This isn’t just my boss’ house, it’s my girlfriend’s parents’, so I would like them to not hate me when this is over.” Lucah wasn’t doing well in the stress department, but this time I didn’t think he was out of line for feeling that way. Ryder’s track record wasn’t encouraging.

  “You got it,” Ryder said, saluting Lucah. “This is the last time I will say fuck until we get in the car again. There. That was it.”

  Lucah glared at him in the rearview mirror.

  “We should probably get out and go in now,” I said, opening my door and getting out. The rest followed and I heard Ryder muttering

  under his breath. He wouldn’t stop adjusting his jacket, or putting his hands in his pockets, or doing something else to show that he was completely uncomfortable in the clothes Sloane had picked out for him. She said she just happened to have them kicking around, but I knew she was full of shit. She’d gotten them made special just for today. The simple black jacket, striped shirt and skinny tie were formal, but still suited him. He looked like a rock star that had to get dressed up for an event, but still wanted to stay true to his image. Plus, the sleeves covered up the tattoos. I had no idea what my mother’s reaction to those would be and I didn’t want to find out.

  “Hello, hello,” Mom said, sweeping into the entryway, her arms outstretched and a bright smile on her face. I almost burst out laughing, but I kept my cool.

  “Mom, this is Ryder, Lucah’s younger brother and you already know Sloane.”

  “Eva!” Sloane said, giving my mom a huge hug.

  “Oh, Sloane darling it’s been forever. I was just thinking of you the other day because I need a dress for an event, and I was hoping maybe I might commission you to make me one. I’m so bored with everything they have in the stores for women my age. I want something a little younger and hipper.” That was the first time in my entire life I’d heard my mom use any variation of the word “hip”.

  “I can absolutely hook you up. Have your measurements changed at all? I should probably take them again.” And she pulled a tape measure out of her purse. Good dependable Sloane.

  “Oh, how about after dinner? I’d rather not do it in front of everyone here.” Mom giggled and patted Sloane’s shoulder. Sloane laughed and gave my mom another hug.

  “And you must be Ryder. It’s such a pleasure to meet you. Welcome to our home. May I get you anything?” Ryder swallowed and it took a second for him to respond. I’d never seen him at a loss for words, so that was a first.

  “No, thank you, Mrs. Clarke. You have a lovely home.” Lucah breathed an audible sigh of relief that Ryder had said something normal.

  “Well, thank you. Rory, why don’t you show Ryder around? I want to have a little chat with Sloane. It’s been so long since I saw her last.” Mom grabbed onto Sloane’s arm and dragged her off, talking about what kind of dress she wanted.

  “Do you really want the tour?” I asked Ryder. He looked around and then up at the ceiling.

  “I guess. It’s interesting seeing how the one percent lives.” I knew the one percent comment was a jab at my parents being wealthy, but I ignored it. I might think the same thing if I’d grown up like Lucah and Ryder. I’d probably hate and resent me too.

  I made the tour quick, and Ryder made few comments.

  “So you grew up here?” he said, fiddling with a lamp in the den, before Lucah gave him a harsh look. I didn’t think he was going to intentionally damage anything. Hell, I’d grown up here and I wasn’t the most graceful of people. I’d broken more things than I could count. My parents never really cared about the stuff as much as I worried they would when I broke it.

  “Yeah, I did.”

  “Just you? No siblings?”

  “Just me.”

  “Huh.” He nodded and continued his inspection. Lucah watched him like a hawk, or a mother with a toddler in a museum. I kind of wished he’d say something, but he didn’t.

  “And what’s the verdict?” I said as we came back to the main room. Ryder shrugged.

  “It’s not as insane as I pictured in my head. It’s comfortable, actually.”

  I shared a glance with Lucah. That was pretty much the nicest thing Ryder had ever said to me, so I was going to count it as a victory.

  Mom and Sloane were still gabbing away, and I stopped for a minute to watch them. Mom always looked younger when she talked to Sloane. Despite the difference in their ages, they always talked and acted like they were barely a few years apart.

  Lucah cleared his throat and they paused, mid-giggle.

  “Oh, there you are. Your father is just finishing dinner, so if you all want to sit down.” She motioned toward the chairs, but then guided Sloane so she was sitting next to Mom, and then Ryder next to Sloane, with Lucah and me on the other side. It was a formal setup, with Dad at the head of the table and Mom at the other end.

  There was a completely awkward moment when Dad came in with the giant salad bowl. He must have forgotten that Ryder was coming, because he looked up and down the table and then almost dropped the salad bowl, but got it on the table in time.

  “You must be Ryder. It’s nice to finally meet another member of Lucah’s family.” He gave him a handshake, and it couldn’t have been my imagination that Dad winced when he shook Ryder’s hand. I’d have to talk to Ryder about that later.

  “It’s a honor to meet you, sir. I’ve heard great things.” Lay it on thick, why don’t you? I almost wanted to kick him under the table, but I couldn’t reach.

  “Well, I’m sorry I wasn’t out here earlier to welcome you. The dinner was proving to be a little finicky.” Mom got up to help Dad bring the rest of the plates in.

  “I thought he’d be taller,” Ryder commented as the rest of us unfolded our napkins and put them in our laps. “I always think people are going to be taller than they turn out to be.” No one commented, but Sloane nudged him to put his napkin in his lap. It was good she sat next to him. I hadn’t even thought about that part of the equation. I’d been too worried about him saying the wrong thing. It was lucky for Ryder that my parents didn’t believe in multiple forks and spoons.

  The dinner was laid out and plates and bowls were passed and silverware clinked and Mom, as per usual, kept the conversation light and constant. She talked mostly to Sloane and Ryder, and I had to hand it to him, he held his own, and the word fuck never crossed his lips.

  He also seemed to have inherited Lucah’s knack for playing the part a situation would require. Next to me, I felt Lucah relaxing and he started chatting with Dad instead of constantly watching Ryder to make sure he didn’t screw up.

  “This is one of the best meals I’ve had in a long time, Sloane’s cooking excluded,” Ryder said as the dessert, little cookie sandwiches with frosting in the middle (very out of character for my parents, but they were probably trying to do something casual to make Ryder feel comfortable) we
re passed around and coffee was poured.

  “Oh, do you have any tea? I’m trying to cut back on my caffeine intake,” I said, and Dad went to put the kettle on.

  “Could I have tea as well?” Sloane asked, and then Ryder said he wanted some, too. It was a little bit adorable.

  “So, Ryder, how do you like living with your brother again?” Mom said. Uh oh. Potential conversational land mine.

  Lucah and I waited for Ryder’s response, hoping that this would continue to go well and not burst into flames.

  “Well, at least this time I have my own room. We used to share one, so that’s an improvement.” Ryder seemed to be more open about the specifics of their childhood than Lucah.

  “I bet that was fun sometimes, though.” My mother could make a conversation with just about anyone, but I didn’t think she’d ever conversed with anyone like Ryder.

  Ryder shrugged.

  “It was at least better than that time we lived in the car. Then I didn’t have any room.” What? Lucah had never told me about that. Lucah’s eyes narrowed and I could feel him shooting daggers at Ryder.

  Mom seemed taken aback, but recovered quickly. I’d given her a rough outline about Lucah and Ryder’s childhood and that their parents were dead, so she knew not to ask about that.

  “But you have a place to stay now, and a brother that cares about you very much. There are some who don’t have anyone.” That was true. I was relieved when Dad brought the tea in and lightened things up.

  After that one little hiccup, things went smoothly. We had tea and coffee and then it was time to go. Mom and Sloane hugged with promises of dress fittings, and Dad shook Ryder’s hand and winced again while Ryder said how beautiful the house was and Dad said he was welcome back anytime.

  And then we got in the car.

  “Why the fuck did you talk about living in a car, Ryder?” Lucah said, the second all the doors closed and everyone’s seatbelt was buckled.

  “Oh, are we saying fuck again? Good. That wasn’t easy.” Ryder lay back against the seat and stretched his legs out as much as he could.