Willis the Pilot : A Sequel to the Swiss Family Robinson

by Adrien Paul

  CHAPTER XXIII.

  IN WHICH WILLIS SHOWS, THAT THE TERM PRESS-GANG MEANS SOMETHING ELSEBESIDES THE GENTLEMEN OF THE PRESS.

  "When I was a youngster, about a year or two older than you are now,Master Fritz, I slipped on board the brig _Norfolk_ as boatswain'smate. The ship at the time was short of hands, so there was noimmediate probability of her weighing anchor; but on the same day Iscratched my name on the books a despatch arrived, in consequence ofwhich we left the harbor, and proceeded out to sea under sealedorders. One day, when off the Irish coast, I was called aft by thefirst lieutenant.

  "'You know something of Cork, my man, I believe?' said he.

  "'Yes, your honor, I have been ashore there once or twice,' said I.

  "'Very good,' said he; 'get ready to go ashore there again as quick asyou like.'

  "Leave to go on shore is always agreeable to a sailor. He prefers thesea, but likes to stretch himself on land now and then, just to enjoya change of air, and look about him a bit; so it was with all possibleexpedition that I made the requisite preparations.

  "When I reappeared, I found a party of twenty men mustered on deck inpipe-clay order. A full ration of small arms was served out to them,and, under the command of the lieutenant, we embarked in the long-boatand rowed ashore. We landed at a point of the coast some miles distantfrom Cork, and it was dark before we reached the military barracks ofthat town, which, for the present, appeared to be our destination.

  "I had not the slightest idea of what we were to do on shore. From ourbeing so heavily armed, I knew it was no mere escort or parade dutythat was in question, and began to think there was work of some kindon hand. This gave me no kind of uneasiness. I only wondered whateverit could be, for there was clearly a mystery of some kind or other.Were we going to besiege Paddy, in his own peaceable city of Cork? Hadsome of the peep-o'-day boys been burning down farmer Magrath's ricksagain? or was there a private still to be routed out and demolished? Icould not tell.

  "Half an hour after our arrival, I was called into a private room bythe lieutenant, who was seated at a table with a package of clothesbeside him. The first lieutenant of the _Norfolk_, I must remark, wasa bit of an original. He had won his way up to the rank he then heldfrom before the mast. His build was rather squat, and his face wasgarnished with a pair of fiery red whiskers, so he was no beauty,added to which he was reckoned one of the most rigid martinets in theservice; yet, for all that, his crew liked him, for they knew hisheart was in the right place.

  "'See, my man,' said he, 'take this package, and rig yourself out inthe toggery it contains.'

  "I obeyed this order, and soon after stood before him, in a pair ofjack-boots, with a slouching sort of tarpauling hat on my head, sothat I might either have passed for a manner out of luck or a dustman.

  "'Well,' said the lieutenant, laughing, 'now you have quite the air ofthe hulks about you.'

  "This remark not being very complimentary, I did not feel called uponto make any reply.

  "'You know,' he continued, 'that the brig is short about a dozenhands, and I want you to pick up a few likely lads here. I understandthere are a number of able-bodied seamen skulking about thepublic-houses, where they will likely remain as long as their moneylasts. I should like to secure as many of them as possible, and thencapture a few stout landsmen to make up the number; but, in the firstplace, I want you to go and find out the best place to make a razzia.'

  "I stared when I found myself all at once promoted to the post ofpioneer for a party of kidnappers, and muttered something or otherabout honor.

  "'Honor, sir!' roared the lieutenant, 'what has honor to do with it,sir? It is duty, sir. It is the laws of the service, sir, and you mustobey them, sir.'

  "'But it is hard, your honor,' said I, 'that the laws of the serviceshould force men to do what they think is wrong.'

  "'And what right, sir, have you to think it is wrong, or to judge theacts of your superiors? If the laws of the service order you fiftylashes at the yard-arm to-morrow, you will find that you will getthem. Do you want to be handed over to the drummer, and to cultivatean acquaintance with the cat?'

  "'No, your honor,' said I, laughing.

  "The lieutenant's face by this time was as red as his whiskers, and,though he was in a towering rage, he quickly calmed down again, likeboiling milk when it is taken off the fire.

  "'Then,' said he, quietly, 'am I to understand you refuse?'

  "'No, your honor,' said I. 'If it is my duty, I must obey; but youwill pardon the liberty, when I say that it is hard to be forced todrag away a lot of poor fellows against their wills.'

  "'Look ye,' replied the lieutenant, 'I tolerate your freedom of speechfor two reasons--the first, because we are here alone, and no harm isdone; the second, because I entertain the same opinion myself; but,mind you, we are both bound by the regulations of the service, and itis mutiny for either of us to disobey.'

  "According to the moral law, the mission with which I was chargedcould scarcely be considered honorable; but, according to the laws ofthe land, or rather of the sea, it was perfectly unexceptionable.Amongst the seamen, a foray amongst the landlubbers was regarded morein the light of a spree than anything else. If, indeed, it werepossible to pick up the lazy and idle amongst the population, thismode of enlistment might be useful; but often the industrious head ofa family was seized, whilst the idle escaped. It was rare, however,that a ship's crew were employed in this sort of duty; men were moreusually obtained through the crimps on shore, who often fearfullyabused the authority with which they were invested for the purpose. Asfor myself, the lieutenant's arguments removed all my scruples, if Iever had any.

  "I then suggested a plan of operations, which was approved. The menwere to be kept ready for action, and the lieutenant himself was toawait my report at the 'Green Dragon,' one of the hotels in the town.

  "At that time there was in the outskirts of Cork a sort of tavern andlodging-house, called the 'Molly Bawn.' This establishment wasfrequented by the lowest class of seamen and 'tramps.' Thither Iwended my way. It was late when I arrived in front of the place; andwhilst hesitating whether I should venture into such a preciousmenagerie, I happened to look round, and, by the light of a dim lampthat burned at the corner of the street, I caught a glimpse of thelieutenant leaning against the wall, quietly smoking an Irish dudeen."

  "Like Rono the Great in the island of Hawai," suggested Jack.

  "Something. This, however, cut short my deliberations. I walked in.There was a crowd of men and women drinking and smoking about the bar.These, however, were not the people I sought. The regular tenants ofthe house were not amongst that lot, and it was essential for me tofind out in what part of the premises they were stowed. I commencedproceedings by ordering a noggin of whisky, and making love to thedamsel that brought it in. After having formally made her an offer ofmarriage, I asked after the landlord. She told me he was engaged withsome customers, but offered to take a message to him.

  "'Then,' said I, 'just tell him that a friend of One-eyed Dick's wouldlike to have a parley with him.'"

  "And who was One-eyed Dick?" inquired Fritz.

  "One of the crew of a piratical craft captured by one of our cruisersa few months before, and who at that time was safely lodged inPortsmouth jail.

  "The girl soon returned. She told me to walk with her, and led methrough some narrow passages into what appeared to be another house.She knocked at a door that was strongly barred and fastened inside. Aslight glance at these precautions made me aware that there was nochance of making a capture here without creating a great disturbance.So, after reflecting an instant, I decided upon adopting some othercourse.

  "When the door was opened I could see nothing distinctly; there was aturf-fire throwing a red glare out of the chimney, a dim oil-lamp hungfrom the roof, but everything was hidden in a dense cloud of tobaccosmoke, through which the light was not sufficiently powerful topenetrate."

  "The atmosphere must have been stifling," observed Fritz.

  "Yes
, it puts me in mind of your remark about the air, which, yousaid, consists of--let me see--"

  "Oxygen and hydrogen."

  "Just so; but the air a sailor breathes when he is at home consistsalmost entirely of tobacco smoke. At last, I could make out twenty orthirty rough-looking fellows seated on each side of a long deal tablecovered with bottles, glasses, and pipes. Dan Hooligan, the landlord,sat at the top--a fit president for such an assembly. He was partly asmuggler, partly a publican, and wholly a sinner. I should say thatthe liquor consumed at that table did not much good to the revenue.How Dan contrived to escape the laws, was a mystery perhaps best knownto the police."

  "So you are a pal of One-eyed Dick's, are you?' said he.

  "'Rather,' said I, adopting the slang of the place.

  "'Well,' said he, 'Dick has been a good customer of mine, and all hispals are welcome at the 'Molly.' I have not seen him lately,however--how goes it with him now?'

  "'Right as a trivet,' said I, 'and making lots of rhino.'

  "'Glad to hear it; and what latitude does he hail in now?'

  "'That,' said I, 'is private and confidential.'

  "'Oh,' said he, 'there are no outsiders here, we are all sworn friendsof Dick's, every mother's son of us.'

  "'Then,' said I, 'Dick is off the Cove in the schooner _Nancy_, ofBrest,'"

  "Holloa, Willis," cried Jack, "there was a fib!"

  "Well, I told you to look out for something of that sort when Ibegan."

  "'What!' cried the landlord, 'Dick in a schooner off the Irish coast?'

  "'Yes,' said I; 'and aboard that schooner there is as tight a cargo ofbrandy and tobacco as ever you set eyes upon.'

  "Here the landlord pricked up his ears, and the rest of the companybegan to listen attentively. The fellow that sat next me coolly toldme that both he and Dick had been lagged for horse-stealing, and hadsubsequently broken out of prison and escaped. He further told me thatmost of the gentlemen present had been all, one way or another, mixedup with Dick's doings; from which I concluded they were a rare parcelof scamps, and resolved, within myself, to try and bag the wholesquad. They were all stout fellows enough, most of them seamen. Ithought they might be able to 'do the State some service,' anddetermined to convert them into honest men, if I could.'

  "'Dick cannot come ashore,' said I; 'some one of his old pals here haspeached, and there is a warrant out against him.'

  "This information threw the assembly into a state of violentcommotion. They rose up, and swore terrible vengeance against the headof the unfortunate culprit when they caught him. The oaths ratheralarmed me at first, for they were of a most ferocious stamp.

  "'Yes,' continued I, 'Dick is aboard the schooner, but, as there aretwo or three warrants out against him, he does not care about comingashore; so said he to me, 'We want a lugger and a few hands to run thecargo ashore; and if you look in at the 'Molly,' and see my old pal,Dan, perhaps you will find some lads there willing to give us a turn.The captain said, if the thing was done clean off, he would standsomething handsome."

  "'Just the thing for us!' shouted half a dozen voices.

  "'But the lugger?' said I.

  "'Oh, Phil Doolan, at the Cove, has a craft that has landed as manycargoes as there are planks in her hull. Besides, he has stowage for afleet of East Indiamen.'

  "'Well, gentlemen," said I, 'the chaplain, One-eyed Dick, and myself,will be at Phil Doolan's to-morrow at midnight; do you agree to meetus there?'

  "This question was answered by a universal 'Yes;' and by way ofclenching the affair, I ordered a couple of gallons of the stiffestpotheen in the house. This was received with three cheers, and beforeI left the 'Molly' every man-jack of them had disappeared under thetable. Dan himself, however, kept tolerably sober, and promised, onaccount of his friendship for One-eyed Dick, to have the whole kitsafe at Phil Doolan's by twelve o'clock next night, and with thisassurance I made my exit from the premises, and steered for the'George and Dragon.'

  "The lieutenant agreed with me in thinking that it would cause toomuch uproar to attack the 'Molly Bawn.' He congratulated me on mysuccess in laying a trap for the people, and promising to meet me atthe Cove, he ordered a car, and drove off in the direction of the_Norfolk's_ boat. Early next morning I started to reconnoitre theground and organize my plan of operations. I found Phil Doolan'smansion to be a mud-built tenement, larger, and standing apart from,the houses that then constituted the village. It was ostensibly asailor's lodging-house and tavern for wayfarers, but, like the 'MollyBawn,' was in reality a rendezvous of smugglers, occasionallypatronized by fugitive poachers and patriots. It was known to itsfamiliars as 'The Crib,' but was registered by the authorities as the'Father Mahony,' who was represented on the sign-post by a full-lengthportrait of James the Second. What gave me most satisfaction was toobserve that the building was conveniently situated for a sack.

  "When night set in I marched the _Norfolk's_ men in close order,and as secretly as possible, to the Cove. Approaching Phil Doolan's inone direction, I could just catch a glimpse of the red coats of a fileof marines advancing in another, with the lieutenant at their head,and, exactly as twelve o'clock struck on the parish clock, the 'FatherMahony' was surrounded on all sides by armed men. Two or threelanterns were now lit, and dispositions made to close up every avenueof escape."

  "'There he is!' cried Willis, interrupting himself, and staring intothe air.

  "Who?" inquired Jack--"Phil Doolan?"

  "No--Bill Stubbs, late of the _Nelson_."

  "Where?"

  "That squat, broad-shouldered man there, bracing the maintops."

  "Yes, now that you point him out, I think I have seen him before,"said Fritz.

  "Holloa, Bill," cried Jack.

  "You see," said Willis, "he turned his head."

  "How d'ye do, Bill?" added Jack.

  "Are you speak'ng to me, sir?" inquired the sailor.

  "Yes, Bill."

  "Then was your honor present when I was christened? I appear to haveforgotten my name for the last six-and thirty years."

  "No use, you see," said Willis; "he is too old a bird to be caught byany of these dodges. But I have lost the thread of my discourse."

  "You had surrounded the cabin, and were lighting lamps."

  "Half a dozen men were stationed at the door, pistol in hand, ready torush in as soon as it opened. The lieutenant and I went forward andknocked, but no one answered. We knocked again, louder than before,but still no answer.

  "'Open the door, in the King's name!' thundered the lieutenant.Silence, as before.

  "Calling to the marines, he ordered them to root up Phil Doolan'ssign-post, and use it as a battering ram against the door. The firstblow of this machine nearly brought the house down, and a crackedvoice was heard calling on the saints inside.

  "'Blessed St. Patrick!' croaked the voice, 'whativer are ye kicking upsuch a shindy out there for? Whativer d'ye want wid an old woman, andniver a livin' sowl in the house 'cept meself and Kathleen in hercoffin?'

  "'Kathleen is dead, then?' said the lieutenant with a grin.

  "'Save yer honor's presence, she's off to glory, an' as dead as aherrin,' replied the voice.

  "'Really!' said the lieutenant, 'and where is Phil Doolan?'

  "'Och, yer honor? he's gone to get some potheen for the wake.'

  "'Well,' said the lieutenant, 'I should like to take a share in wakingthe defunct--what's her name?'

  "'Kathleen, yer honor.'

  "'Well, just let us in to take a last look at the worthy creature.'

  "The door then creaked on its rusty hinges, and we entered. Not asoul, however, was to be seen anywhere, save and except the old womanherself. The coffin containing the remains of Kathleen, resting on twostools, stood in the middle of the floor, with a plate of salt asusual on the lid. I fairly thought I had been done, and looked uponmyself as the laughing stock of the entire fleet."

  "So far," remarked Jack, "your story has been all right, but the lastepisode was rather negligently handled."


  "How?" inquired Willis.

  "Why, you did not make enough of the coffin scene; your description istoo meagre. You should have said, that the wind blew without in fiercegusts, the weathercocks screeched on the roofs, and caused you todread that the ghost of the defunct was coming down the chimney; largeflakes of snow were rushing through the half-open door; a solitaryrushlight dimly lit up the chamber, and cast frightful shadows uponthe wall."

  "Well; but the night was fine, and there was not a breath of wind."

  "What about that? A little wind, more or less, a weathercock or so,some drops of rain, or a few flakes of snow, do not materially detractfrom the truth, whilst they heighten the color of the picture."

  "And if some lightning tearing through the clouds were added?"

  "Yes, that would most undoubtedly increase the effect; but go on withyour story."

  "I knew Phil to be an artful dodger, and was determined not to befoiled by a mere trick, so I laid hold of a lantern and closelyexamined the walls and flooring. My investigation was successful, forjust under the coffin I detected traces of a trap-door."

  "'Well, my good woman, what have you got down there?" inquired thelieutenant.

  "'Is it underground, ye mane, yer honor? divil a hail's there, if itisn't the rats.'

  "'Well, just remove the coffin a little aside; we shall see if wecannot pepper some of the rats for you.'

  "Here the old woman appealed to a vast number of saints, and protestedagainst Kathleen's remains being disturbed. The lieutenant, however,grew tired of this farce, and ordered the coffin to be shifted. Asailor accordingly laid hold of each end.

  "'Blazes!' said one, 'here is a body that weighs.'

  "'Perhaps,' said the other, 'the coffin is lined with lead.'

  "The trap-door was drawn up, and the lieutenant, pistol in hand,descended alone.

  "'Now, my lads,' said he, addressing some invisible personages, 'weknow you are here, and I call upon you to yield in the King'sname--resistance is useless, the house is surrounded, and we are inforce, so you had better give in without more ado.'

  "No answer was returned to this exordium; but we heard the murmuringof muffled voices, as if the rapscallions were deliberating. I nowdescended with my lamp, followed by some of the seamen, and beheld myfriends of the night before either stretched on the ground or proppedup against the walls, like a lot of mummies in an Egyptian tomb.

  "They were handcuffed one by one, pushed or hauled up the stairs, andthen tied to one another in a line. When we had secured the whole lotof them in this way--

  "'Lieutenant,' said I, winking, 'will you permit me to send a ballinto that coffin?'

  "'Please yourself about that, young man,' said he.

  "Here the old woman recommenced howling again and called upon all thesaints in the calendar to punish us for my sacrilegious design.

  "'Shoot a dead body,' said I, 'where's the harm?' Besides, what isthat salt there for?'

  "'To keep away evil spirits,' was the reply.

  "'Very well,' said I, 'my pistol will scare them away as well.' Then,cocking it with a loud clink, I presented it slowly at the coffin."

  "The lid all at once flew off--the salt-was thrown on the ground witha crash--the defunct suddenly returned from the other world in perfecthealth, and sat half upright in his bier. I did not recognize theindividual at first, but, on closer inspection, found him to be mycommunicative companion of the preceding night--the horse-stealer ofthe 'Molly Bawn;' and, being a stout young fellow, he was harnessed tothe others, and we commenced our march to the boats."

  "You do not appear to have had much trouble in effecting the capture,"remarked Fritz.

  "No; the men were unarmed, and were nearly all intoxicated. You neversaw such a troop; scarcely one of them could walk straight; theyassumed all sorts of figures; the file of prisoners was just like abar of music, it was a string of quavers, crotchets, and zig-zags.Luckily, it was late at night, else we might have had the villageabout our ears, and, instead of flakes of snow and screechingweathercocks, we might have had a shower of dead cats and rotten eggs.Probably a rescue might have been attempted; at all events, we mighthave calculated on a volley of brickbats on our way to the boats.There would have been no end of commotion, uproar, confusion, andhubbub, possibly smashed noses, blackened eyes, broken beads--"

  "Holloa, Willis!"

  "You said just now that a little colouring was necessary."

  "Certainly; but the privilege ought not to be abused. Besides, brokenheads and smashed faces are the realities, and not the accessories ofthe picture."

  "Oh, I see. If it is night, the moon should be introduced; and if itis day, the sun--and so on?"

  "Of course; and, if the circumstances are of a pleasing nature, youmust leave horrors and terrors on your pallette; change gusts intozephyrs, snow into roses and violets, and the weathercocks into goldenvanes glittering in the sunshine."

  "I understand."

  "You want to color a popular outbreak, do you not?"

  "Yes."

  "Then you should introduce a tempest howling, the waves roaring, thelightning flashing, and discord raging in the air as well as on theearth."

  "Well, to continue my story. Although it was midnight, the disturbancebegan to wake up the villagers, and a crowd was collecting, so wehurried off our prisoners to the boats as speedily as we could. Somefive and twenty able bodied men were thus added to his Majesty'sfleet. The object of our visit to the Irish coast was accomplished,and the _Norfolk_ continued her voyage to the West Indies. Now youknow what is meant by the word _pressed_, and likewise the nauticalsignification of the word _press-gang_."

  "And you say that Bill Stubbs has been trapped on board this ship bysuch means?"

  "Yes, at New Orleans."

  "According to your story, then, that does not say very much in hisfavor?"

  "No, not a great deal; still, that proves nothing--the fact of hiscalling himself Bob is a worse feature. A man does not generallychange his name without having good, or rather bad, reasons for it."

  "What appears to me," remarked Fritz, "as the most singular feature ofyour press-gang adventure is, that you are alive to tell it."

  "Why so?"

  "Because I think it ought to end thus: 'The victims of the press-gangstrangled Willis a few days after,'"

  "Aye, aye, but you do not know what a sailor is; our recruits had notbeen a fortnight at sea before they entirely forgot the trick I hadplayed them."

  Just as Willis concluded his narrative, the man at the mast-headcalled out, "Sail ho!"

  "Where away?" bawled the captain.

  "Right a-head," replied the voice.

  The _Hoboken_ had hitherto pursued her voyage uninterruptedly, and theYankee captain now prepared to signalize himself by a capture.