The Newcomer

by Laura Elizabeth Woollett

  They kissed again, her gloved hands floating in the warmth like bath toys.

  ‘I used to see you walking, you know,’ Rabbit confessed. ‘I started riding my bike that way to work, so I could see you. I never thought I’d be so lucky.’

  ‘You noticed me?’ Paulina’s cheeks glowed. ‘You should’ve talked to me, hey.’

  ‘Darling … I should warn you.’ Rabbit turned away to dry the cutlery. ‘I haven’t lived with a woman since Bunny’s mother. Tatiana. Almost ten years ago.’

  ‘Yeah?’ Paulina went back to her scrubbing. ‘Time to give it another go, I reckon.’

  ‘She wasn’t an easy woman to live with,’ Rabbit continued. ‘She was bored by Fairfolk, by me. Too quiet for her.’

  ‘I like the quiet.’ Paulina passed him the chopping board. ‘I don’t get bored easy.’

  Rabbit set down the board, took her gloved hands in his. ‘What would your mother say about you moving in with a man my age?’

  Paulina laughed.

  ‘Probably the same thing she said about me moving to Fairfolk: “I don’t feel good about this, Paulina!”’

  TROPHY

  Bunny was folding the washing after school, like Rita had asked her to, when she found it. In the pocket of her dad’s jeans. Right away, she knew it was hers.

  ‘Ugh!’ She flung the skimpy piece of black fabric across the room. ‘Urghhhh!’

  Anastasia stirred from where she’d been sleeping, curled up like a snail by the pillow. Bunny looked at her pleadingly.

  ‘How could he, Anastasia?’ She sniffed. ‘Oh, Anastasia! What do I do?’

  Anastasia blinked her green eyes, then stared at the wall, not helpful. Slowly, like Anastasia sneaking up on a bird, Bunny inched over to the g-string, pinched it between her fingertips.

  It was hers. Definitely hers. But why was it in his pocket?

  She scrunched it up quickly, stuffed it inside the junior girl’s archery trophy on the shelf above her bed, then dug her diary out from under her mattress.

  Dear diary, she wrote. I don’t know how to tell you this, but I think my dad might be a murderer! Verly, a MURDERER! Oh diary, give me guidance in this moment of turmoile! What do I do, what do I do???

  She kept quiet all day at school, even though her chest felt like it was full of bugs, and even though she almost cried during her maths test, and even though Hine asked why she was being so weird at lunchtime, picking at her tuna-salad sandwich under the banyan tree. After school, she met Hine like usual for the walk home, and Hine asked if she wanted to get ice cream at Jellyfish Fuel, and Bunny said, ‘Bes’ not,’ and Hine said it again:

  ‘Why’re you being so weird today?’

  ‘I’m not weird.’ Bunny’s eyes prickled. ‘I’m always like this.’

  ‘You are so weird! Are you on a diet or something?’

  ‘Aye.’ Bunny shrugged. ‘Maybe.’

  ‘Well, I’m getting ice cream.’

  Hine took ages at the freezer, deciding between a Hava Heart and a chocolate Paddle Pop. She took ages paying, too; she only had silver coins.

  ‘You’re so annoying!’ Bunny whined. ‘Don’t you ever have proper money?’

  ‘I can’t help that my dad’s not as rich as your dad!’

  ‘My dad’s not rich! He just owns lots of land. It’s like, verly expensive to maintain.’

  ‘Can I have two dollars?’

  Bunny rolled her eyes. ‘Aye.’

  Outside Jelly’s, Hine grabbed Bunny’s arm, put her index finger to her lips, and started jumping up and down, pointing at Jesse Camilleri filling up his red Commodore. ‘It’s him! The serial killer!’

  ‘It’s not “serial” if there’s only one victim!’ Bunny hissed. ‘Duh, Hine!’

  ‘There’ll be more, eh.’ Hine unpeeled her Paddle Pop and sucked on the tip. ‘Look how dark he is.’

  ‘Hine! That’s verly racist, eh!’

  Jesse glanced back at them, and Hine shrieked, pulled Bunny’s arm, and dragged her away. They ran all the way from Jelly’s up to Missionary Road.

  ‘Thanks a lot, Bun! Now he knows us,’ Hine fretted, when they ran out of breath. ‘We’ll have to lock our windows every night!’

  ‘Duh, he knows us anyway! We’ve only been buying meat from Camilleri’s since we were born.’

  ‘But now he knows us, knows us. He knows we know !’ Hine examined the dribble of ice cream down her hand. ‘Ohhhh, Bunny, it’s melting ! This is the worst day of my life!’

  ‘Don’t waste it! I paid good money for that!’

  They walked on, Hine lapping at her ice cream. A couple of guys in a truck honked at them as they walked, and a little after that, Kristian King pulled up in his Bongo ute and asked if they wanted a lift. Hine looked at Bunny hopefully. Bunny shook her head. ‘No thank you.’

  ‘You sure?’ Kristian asked. ‘It’s a long way, girls.’

  ‘No thank you,’ Bunny repeated.

  Hine followed her lead. ‘No thank you.’

  Kristian shook his head like he thought they were stupid, and drove off.

  ‘I would’ve said yes,’ Hine griped, trudging uphill. ‘It’s not like he’s the killer.’

  ‘You would’ve said yes even if he was.’

  ‘Yeah, but only for, like, information.’ Hine finished her Paddle Pop, chucked the popstick into a field of grazing cows. ‘And to look at his arms. He has really good arms, eh? And … Bun, are you crying?’

  ‘No!’

  ‘You are so!’

  ‘The sun’s in my eyes!’

  ‘Why’re you being so weird?’

  ‘Shut up!’

  ‘Tell me!’

  ‘It’s a secret!’

  Hine stopped in her tracks. ‘Best friends don’t keep secrets!’

  ‘I’m not allowed to tell.’

  ‘Then we can’t be friends, sorry.’

  Bunny wiped her eyes. ‘You have to promise not to tell anyone.’

  ‘I know how secrets work.’

  ‘Pinky promise?’

  ‘Pinky promise.’

  They linked pinky fingers and, weeping, Bunny told her everything she knew about the g-string.

  ‘It’s so small,’ Hine marvelled. ‘How does it even cover her notties?’

  ‘She shaves them, I think.’ Bunny felt sick. ‘Shaved, I mean.’

  ‘Like, all of them? That’s so slutty!’

  ‘Soooo slutty!’ Bunny agreed. ‘That’s how I knew it belonged to Loony Lina! Rita never wears undies like this.’

  ‘Ew! I can’t believe you just made me picture Rita in a g-string!’

  ‘I can’t believe it was in his pocket! Why would Dad put it in his pocket?’

  ‘It’s probably a trophy, eh. To remember her by. When he’s wanking and stuff.’

  ‘Nay!’

  ‘At least it’s been through the wash.’ Hine inspected the crotch. ‘Do you think DNA comes out in the wash?’

  Bunny snivelled, shrugged. ‘I wish they taught us this in school.’

  ‘Remember in the news when Monica Lewinsky had the president’s seed on her dress? Did she wash her dress?’

  ‘I don’t know. Dad always changed the channel when that story came on.’

  Hine giggled, stretched the g-string. ‘I wish I had the body for these, eh!’

  ‘Ugh! You’d wear that? It’s so slutty!’

  ‘Boys like it, but.’

  ‘But, imagine a string between your bum cheeks! How does it not get kuka on it?’

  ‘You wipe after you go, duh! Don’t you wipe?’

  ‘I wipe!’ Bunny started crying all over again. ‘You’re not even helping, Hine!’

  ‘I’ll help!’ Hine’s hand flew to her heart. ‘I swear on our friendship, I’ll help you, Elena White! Even if it makes m
e an accessory to murder. That’s what best friends are for.’

  ‘I can’t keep it in my room. It’s giving me nightmares.’

  ‘Why don’t you just put it back in your dad’s pocket?’

  ‘Because! It’s gross.’

  ‘Or you could put it with Rita’s things?’

  ‘She’ll lyme him!’

  ‘I know! Why don’t we sneak into Jesse’s place when he’s at work and hide it there?’

  ‘Nay, Hine! He’s innocent. And he’s verly cute, eh.’

  ‘Or someone else? Yooey Turner! He’s a perv.’

  ‘Nay, Hine.’ Bunny dashed a tear. ‘It doesn’t matter if Yooey’s a perv. If they test for DNA, they’ll know he’s not the culprit.’

  ‘Then there’s only one solution,’ Hine said solemnly. ‘We need to destroy the evidence.’

  They were sitting in front of the fireplace, whispering to each other, when Rabbit got home, wearing his bike gear.

  ‘Hello, girls,’ he said. ‘What’s with the fire? It’s twenty degrees out.’

  ‘Sorry, Dad.’ Bunny shivered. ‘We got cold.’

  Hine shivered too. ‘Brrrr!’

  ‘You might think to put a jumper on, next time.’ Rabbit frowned at their bare arms and legs. ‘You didn’t think to put your jumpers on?’

  ‘Sorry, Dad. Want me to chop more wood?’

  ‘Nay, I’ll do it. It’ll be good stress-relief, after the day I’ve had.’

  When Rabbit said that, Hine gasped and clutched Bunny’s arm, terror-struck. Rabbit looked concerned. ‘Is … everything alright, Hine?’

  ‘Yes Mr White,’ Hine squeaked. ‘I’m good, thank you.’

  ‘Are you staying for dinner? I’m making seafood mornay.’

  ‘Aye. If that’s not too much trouble, Mr White.’

  ‘Nay trouble.’ Rabbit smiled. ‘There’s always room for you at our table.’

  Then he moseyed out of the room, whistling a tune.

  ‘No offence,’ Hine whispered, once he was gone. ‘But your dad’s verly creepy, eh.’

  Bunny was offended.

  Two days later, Bunny and Hine were buying ice cream after school when they found themselves standing in line behind that podgy old detective from Canberra with the Polish name and the big round head like a soccer ball.

  ‘Elena White, isn’t it?’ he greeted her.

  ‘Aye,’ Bunny mumbled. ‘Nobody calls me “Elena”, but.’

  ‘Don’t you get hot, wearing that suit?’ Hine blurted out.

  ‘A bit, yes,’ said Detective Wozniak. ‘But I like to look professional.’

  Hine smirked. ‘You look like a mainie.’

  ‘Well, the cat’s out of the bag, now.’ Wozniak looked at Bunny’s ice cream. ‘Cornetto. Good choice.’

  Bunny burst into tears.

  ‘I don’t know anything, okay! Leave me alone!’

  OFF THE ROCK

  ‘Being a mother is hard,’ Paulina moaned. ‘I see what you meant, all those years.’

  ‘You’re not a mother!’ Judy scoffed. ‘Sounds to me like you enjoy fighting with the girl more than you enjoy that old bloke’s company.’

  Judy always found a way to bring it back to how boring Rabbit was. ‘I don’t! I’m a calm person, essentially. Bunny just shits me.’

  ‘Yes, child. You’re calm … like a boiling kettle.’

  Judy chuckled at her own joke, way more than it deserved. All at once, Paulina was filled with an envy as white-hot as the bulb of the reading lamp she was quietly burning her hand on.

  ‘Muuuum. Are you drunk?’

  ‘What? No!’ Judy chuckled again. ‘Oh, I had a couple of wines with the girls from work. Renee turned in her thesis on Georges Bataille! Just a couple, though. I didn’t want to cramp their style.’

  ‘You don’t seem to mind cramping mine.’

  ‘You called me.’ Concern edged into Judy’s voice. ‘Are you really that bored?’

  ‘I’m not bored!’ Paulina cried, so loud that Rabbit stirred in the reading chair where he’d dozed off with The Charterhouse of Parma in his lap. ‘Just … shitty. Bunny shits me.’

  ‘Darling, are you getting your period soon? You always get so moody before.’

  ‘Ugh. I dunno.’ Paulina cooled her hand on the windowpane. ‘It’s hard keeping track. They’re so irregular.’

  ‘If you gained a bit of weight—’

  ‘I’m eating! Gawd, all I do is eat.’ Paulina lifted her shirt to examine her after-dinner bloat. ‘I ate so much of this pesto pasta Ric made tonight. I look gross.’

  ‘Oh, come off it.’

  ‘You can’t see me. I reckon this is the fattest I’ve ever been in my life.’

  ‘I’d like to see you, Paulina. Any time you want to visit, just say the word. Have you thought any more about Christmas?’

  ‘Yeah,’ she spat. ‘I’m spending it with Ric.’

  ‘Well … I’ll miss you,’ Judy murmured. ‘And not just me. Aunt Caro. Uncle Tim. Bronson. Even Wyatt’s flying over from the States with his girlfriend. Look, you can even bring—’

  ‘I’m not bringing Ric. Bloody hell. I’m not putting him through that.’

  ‘I’ll be nice. I’ll make Caro be nice,’ Judy bargained. ‘I know it’s awkward, but if you’re serious about this old man — and it sounds like you are — I’ll have to meet him eventually.’

  ‘We don’t need your passive-aggressive bullshit. We’re happy on our little island.’

  ‘Oh yes. Just like Blue Lagoon.’

  ‘Gawd, you’re a cow!’

  ‘Oh, Paulina.’ Judy sighed. ‘I worry about you.’

  ‘I worry about you. You need to get a life.’

  ‘You have nothing in common with that man.’

  ‘Racist!’

  ‘Come off it. You know that’s not what I mean.’ Judy softened her tone. ‘Whoever he is, he’s not worth isolating yourself for. He’s not worth changing for.’

  ‘Bloody hell, one minute you’re saying I need to drink less and get my life sorted, next minute you’re on at me for changing? I can’t do anything right!’

  ‘That’s not what I’m saying. I just mean … it doesn’t have to be all or nothing. You don’t have to stay in every night for months on end pretending to read Anna Karenina. Why don’t you have some beers with your workmate at that new surfer bar?’

  ‘I don’t wanna go to Wetties with Flick. She’s a dumbarse.’ Paulina examined the pink mark on her hand. ‘And I like staying in with Ric. I feel sad when we’re apart … like I’m not me.’

  ‘You’re you. You’re more you than anyone I know.’

  ‘What do you know? Stupid receptionist.’

  ‘I’ve been there, Paulina. I know.’

  ‘I’m not you.’

  ‘I know. You’re brighter, and bubblier, and funnier. Which is why I hate the thought of you changing for a man.’

  ‘He’s not just any man. I love him.’

  ‘Love isn’t everything.’ Judy sighed again. ‘Gawd help you, Paulina. If this is the man you marry. If you’re not bored yet, you will be. You’ll cheat. It’s in your nature.’

  ‘Bitch!’ Paulina’s voice cracked. ‘Have some faith in me!’

  ‘I have faith in you, darling … I just don’t have faith that he’s enough.’

  ‘Fuck you! Get a life! Goodnight!’

  Paulina slammed down the phone, huddled up in a brittle ball of tears. When she looked up, Rabbit was wide awake. ‘Another fight with your mother?’

  Nodding, Paulina sprung from her chair and curled up in his lap.

  ‘She wants me to go back to the mainland for Christmas.’

  Rabbit parted her fringe, planted a dry kiss on her forehead.

  ‘That’s not such a bad idea. It might do you go
od to get off the rock for a bit.’

  ‘Are you sure you don’t want anything from the mainland, Bun?’ Paulina burbled from the suicide-seat. ‘Maybe I can buy you a sense of fashion while I’m there.’

  ‘Maybe you can buy Dad a less annoying girlfriend.’

  ‘Bunny!’ Rabbit warned.

  ‘Nah, he likes them annoying.’ Paulina caressed Rabbit’s leg. ‘Howabout I buy you a diary that actually locks?’

  ‘Daaad. You said you’d tell her to stop—’

  ‘Lina,’ Rabbit chastised her mildly. ‘Have you been reading Bunny’s diary again?’

  ‘Course not! I’m just teasing.’

  Paulina smiled at him and he smiled back, squeezed her thigh, and turned into the airport carpark. ‘I’ll get your bag, gorgeous.’

  ‘Thanks, babe!’ Paulina sang. She waited until he’d closed the door behind him before leaning over the back of her seat and smirking at Bunny. ‘Dear Diary: Hayden didn’t say ‘hi’ to me today. Why doesn’t he like me? ’

  ‘Dear Diary,’ Bunny retorted. ‘I only ate salad today. Why am I so fat? ’

  ‘Dear Diary! Maybe Hayden doesn’t like me cos I’m a brace-faced little cow! ’

  ‘Dear Diary! Maybe Ric doesn’t wanna marry me cos I’m an anorexic bitch! ’

  ‘The plane’s refuelling.’ Rabbit opened her door. He had her suitcase on his shoulder. ‘Looks like we’ve got time for a coffee!’

  ‘You know that suitcase has wheels?’ Paulina chirped, getting out of the car.

  ‘I’ve got it.’ Rabbit hoisted it further up his shoulder. ‘Bunny, are you coming out?’

  Paulina giggled. ‘Crack a window, she’ll be right!’

  Bunny got out and trailed after them toward the terminal. ‘Can I get a Coke, Dad?’

  ‘I suppose so.’ Rabbit fished for his wallet. ‘Get me a long black. And something for Lina.’

  ‘Diet Coke!’

  There was hardly any line for check-in. Paulina clung to Rabbit while she waited, announcing between kisses, ‘I’m gonna miss you soooo much, babe!’

  ‘I’ll miss you too.’ Rabbit looked around self-consciously. ‘But it’s only a week.’

  ‘A week without this.’

  She slipped her hands in his back pockets, kissed his neck. The bloke ahead of them in line turned around, eyebrows raised.