My Pear-Shaped Life: The most gripping and heartfelt page-turner of 2020!

by Harrington, Carmel

  But tonight Ray was determined to get her to talk to him. He’d waited years for this, and he wasn’t going to let her go again. He suggested a drink, just the two of them, before Greta and Dylan joined them for dinner. He went down to the bar ahead of her while she finished getting ready. He’d ordered them both a martini cocktail, and with the pianist playing a few feet from them, it couldn’t have been more perfect.

  ‘Hello you,’ Billie said, walking up to him.

  ‘Wow.’ He struggled to find words. Billie was wearing a blue dress, the colour of cornflowers. He was glad he’d worn the shirt Greta had talked him into at the beginning of the trip. A classic white that she said looked good on every man when worn with a pair of blue jeans and a jacket.

  ‘Wow yourself.’ And she smiled that beautiful smile of hers and made his heart hammer in time to the Billy Joel number being played on the piano.

  ‘I wanted to talk to you—’ Ray said.

  But Billie’s phone rang, cutting him off. ‘It’s Lucy. I’ve got to take this. Sorry.’ She kissed his cheek and walked out of the bar.

  When Billie didn’t return in fifteen minutes, he went looking for her. She wasn’t in the lobby, so he went upstairs to their room, feeling dread begin to prick at him. She wouldn’t leave him on his own unless something were wrong.

  As soon as he walked into their room and saw her packing her bag, her face hard once more, he knew he’d lost her.

  ‘Mama is dead. While I was here with you, driving across the bloody I70, she had a massive heart attack. And she died on her own.’

  ‘Oh my god, Billie, I’m so sorry.’

  ‘Stop it. Don’t you dare say you’re sorry. If you hadn’t arrived on my doorstep – something I never asked for – I would have been at home with her.’ She pushed past him, her bag in hand. ‘I’m going home.’

  ‘Let me drive you. Just give me five minutes to get my things together,’ Ray said.

  ‘I’m on my way to the airport. I’ll get the next flight out of here. It’s over, whatever this was. Go home, Ray.’

  ‘You can’t mean that. Not after everything we’ve been through this week.’

  ‘I mean every word. Don’t follow me or I swear I won’t be responsible for my actions.’ She paused at the door for a moment, and her face softened. And for one moment he thought she was going to change her mind. ‘Just promise me one thing. Don’t go back to that world you created that was so small. Get out, have adventures. A guy like you is a catch. I keep telling you that. The right woman for you is out there somewhere. But know this for sure. It’s never going to be me.’

  And she walked out of his life for the second and final time.

  Chapter 38

  And so the duo, that became a trio, then a quartet, was back to being a trio again.

  Greta called Billie and begged her to reconsider her decision. ‘Let us help you bury your mama. That’s what friends do. I liked her so much, I’d really like to be there, to say goodbye and to help you.’

  But Billie was adamant that they should stay away, no matter how hard Greta tried to get through to her. Greta sobbed for Billie’s loss. Not just her mama. But for Ray too.

  Ray, Greta and Dylan had no choice but to fly home a few days later, each changed by their time on the road trip. Emily and Stephen were waiting in arrivals for them.

  ‘Oh my goodness Stephen, look at our girl. She’s smiling!’ Emily shouted, waving frantically to her daughter. She ducked under the steel barrier and ran to Greta, pulling her into her arms.

  ‘I’ve only been gone ten days!’ Greta said, laughing, hugging her back hard.

  ‘You look fantastic. There’s a glow about you, isn’t there Stephen?’

  Greta looked at her dad, who was standing back, shuffling his feet. ‘Hey, Dad.’

  ‘Hello. Are you OK? You look OK. You look more than OK,’ Stephen said.

  ‘I’m really good. Honestly. Do I get a hug?’

  ‘I wasn’t sure you wanted one from me,’ Stephen said. ‘I’ve been too heavy-handed with you. I can see that now.’

  Greta’s reply was to move into his embrace and snuggle in close. ‘I’m lucky to have you on my side, Dad. I haven’t forgotten that.’

  ‘So we’re OK? You’ve forgiven me?’ Stephen asked.

  ‘There’s nothing to forgive,’ Greta said, and realized that this was true. She’d learnt a lot on the road trip from her friends. Not least of which was that Greta was lucky to have both her parents alive. When she thought about Billie and Dylan’s pain at losing their fathers, it made her want to weep.

  Stephen looked over his daughter’s head to his brother Ray. ‘Thank you.’

  ‘For what?’

  ‘For taking such good care of my girl.’

  ‘My pleasure,’ Ray said.

  ‘Are you going to introduce us to this handsome man?’ Emily said, looking Dylan up and down.

  ‘Yes of course! Mam, Dad, this is my … my Dylan,’ Greta said.

  ‘Dylan, from work? Well now. You’d better come over for Sunday lunch next week, we’ve got Ciaran’s new girlfriend coming, we might as well have you too,’ Emily said to him. ‘Besides which, I feel like I know you, seeing as I’ve been looking at your picture for the past few days.’

  Stephen jumped in to explain. ‘Your mother has had that picture of you all with Dr Greta Gale blown up and framed.’

  ‘Oh the excitement in my slimming class when I told them that my Greta and Ray were best friends with Dr Greta Gale. And when I told Amanda, she was green!’

  ‘I’m not sure we’re best friends,’ Ray began, but was shushed by Emily.

  ‘Tttthank you for the invite, Mrs Gale,’ Dylan said.

  ‘Oh, what a lovely polite young man,’ Emily said, charmed. ‘Maybe some of your manners will rub off on my two bowsies at home.’

  ‘Oh I missed you, Mam,’ Greta said, going in for another hug.

  ‘See you tomorrow?’ Dylan said to Greta, over Emily’s shoulder.

  ‘Absolutely.’ And as she watched him walk away, her heart fluttered with happiness.

  Later that evening, Dylan messaged her to tell her that Greta could have her slot back with the Murder Mystery Crew. While they’d been away, Donna had taken off on a cruise ship for the season, leaving a broken-hearted Jimmy behind. Greta knew that she’d let her cast mates down in the past couple of months. But she was ready to work hard. They all welcomed her back, with nothing but open arms – and a lot of slagging when they found out about the new romance between her and ‘the boss’.

  With Greta’s encouragement, Dylan began to write his own songs. Now that he’d started to sing, he couldn’t seem to stop. His mother told him that his father would be so proud of him. He was finally a righteous man in every sense, as his father always wanted for him.

  And Greta found the courage to call her agent, Michelle. She hoped in this case her journey wasn’t coming to an abrupt end. It took her a few attempts to get a word in edgeways with an irate Michelle, who was determined to have her say about Greta’s absence. But once Greta explained about her addiction, her time in rehab and how strong she was feeling now, Michelle was surprisingly understanding.

  ‘Do I have a future with you?’ Greta asked. She wanted to know. No more hiding away from truths that she didn’t like.

  ‘Do you want to continue doing auditions, hoping for that break? Or is it time for a switch in direction?’ Michelle asked.

  ‘I don’t want to quit the business. But maybe the business is quitting on me.’

  ‘Here’s what I think, for what it’s worth. Maybe all this time, something has been holding you back. You’ve been numbing yourself with drugs. Even so, you’ve been good, nailing every audition. It’s just been bad luck that you’ve not got your big break yet. Imagine what you can do now that you have your head straight. Maybe now that you are truly alive, you will start to see results. How’s that for something to think about?’

  Greta was astounded at Michelle’s words. ‘S
o you are not firing me then?’

  ‘Of course not. I have faith in you. I keep telling you, Greta. We only need one casting director to say yes.’

  She suggested that Greta take a break for a few more weeks, then they could have a chat about the future.

  Days became weeks as each of them slotted back into their lives at home in Dublin. At first, Ray found it hard to settle down. He missed Billie, and he wasn’t sure he would ever be able to forget her. He sent her a text message every day. But she never answered him. Both Greta and Dylan tried to get her too, but she had disappeared again.

  Greta and Dylan spent a lot of time at Ray’s house, watching movies with him and reminiscing about their trip. Both of them were worried about Ray. Their care and support kept him going. And he remembered the last thing that Billie had said to him before they said goodbye. Don’t go back to that world you created that was so small. Get out, have adventures. He had every intention of doing just that.

  Greta spoke to Noreen about her relationship with Dylan. There wasn’t an express rule against dating in your first year of sobriety, contrary to popular understanding. It was suggested that it was better not to date, as it often took focus off recovery. Noreen told Greta that only she could decide whether it was the right time or not.

  ‘Would you want to date you right now? Have you learned to love yourself yet? Because it is only then that you can truly love Dylan and be loved in return.’ Noreen had asked.

  Greta thought about that a lot. Recovery for her came one day at a time. But she felt stronger, more sure of herself than she had in years. And being with Dylan made sense when a lot in her life didn’t. Her relationship with Dylan was healthy and his support was endless. She felt safe when she was with him and she was her true self, with no smoke or mirrors. And as Uncle Ray said, love couldn’t be penciled in at a specific time. When it called, you had to answer it or regret it for the rest of your life.

  Greta continued going to NA meetings in the city once a week again, and afterwards she would call to meet Ray for lunch. Today, she had a plan. She was determined to get his profile up on Tinder. She wouldn’t take no for an answer. As she walked down the quays towards his office, a man ran out of the local betting shop. He crashed into Greta, almost knocking her off her feet.

  ‘Hey watch it,’ Greta said, then froze when she realized who was standing there. ‘Oh my god. Sam! Hi!’

  Their eyes locked. He looked panicked then resigned.

  ‘Are you OK?’ Greta asked. She glanced upwards to the neon green betting shop sign. ‘Oh, Sam.’

  ‘You were right. It wasn’t just Monday that sucked. It was every day.’

  ‘Have you time for a coffee? We can catch up,’ Greta suggested.

  He shook his head. Then he pulled his collar up around his neck and walked at speed in the opposite direction. She wanted to cry for him.

  ‘You OK?’ Ray asked when she got to his office.

  ‘Do you remember me talking about a guy called Sam from Hope Crossing?’

  He nodded.

  ‘He’s back gambling. I just saw him come out of the betting shop up the road.’

  ‘Ah, I’m sorry to hear that.’

  ‘So am I. I liked him. I bet his wife didn’t take him back. Or maybe she did, and he still gambled. Uncle Ray, don’t ever let me relapse.’

  ‘You don’t need me to watch over you, Greta. You’re doing just fine on your own. But I’ll always have your back, of that you can be guaranteed.’

  They walked to a nearby bar and ordered soup and sandwiches. ‘It’s a bit surreal being home, isn’t it?’ Greta said.

  ‘It is.’

  ‘How are you doing? I don’t suppose you-know-who has answered your messages yet.’

  ‘You can say her name. I won’t fall to pieces. But I won’t lie either. I’ve had better times. I miss her.’

  ‘I know.’ Greta reached over and squeezed his hand. ‘I’m so sorry it didn’t work out. I miss her too. I thought we were friends. All four of us.’

  ‘I thought we had found our way back to each other … She kept telling me not to make it into something it wasn’t, but …’

  ‘You thought she’d change her mind? I did too, for what it’s worth, Uncle Ray. You were good together.’

  ‘It’s time I accepted the fact that this wasn’t meant to be. I gave it a good shot. At least I can always say that. Let’s change the subject and talk about nicer things. Like, for example, how’s lover boy?’

  Greta beamed.

  ‘That good?’ Ray laughed. ‘Being happy suits you.’

  ‘He asked me to be his girlfriend. Formally. He said he didn’t want any misunderstandings.’

  ‘I take it you said yes.’

  ‘Of course I said yes. I’ve never had a boyfriend before. I’ll probably mess it up.’

  ‘Probably,’ Ray agreed laughing. ‘Have you been sleeping OK?’

  ‘I seem to be a solid six-hours-a-night gal these days. Who’d have thought it? And this morning Michelle called. My agent. Remember Louise, that casting director I auditioned for in London, just before I free-falled in spectacular fashion?’

  ‘Yeah …’

  ‘Well, she rang Michelle and specifically asked for me. There’s a part she has in mind that I’m perfect for. She said, and I quote, it’s mine to lose.’

  ‘No pressure then.’

  ‘I know! I’m meeting them both for a chat about it all tomorrow.’

  Ray leaned over and kissed his niece on her forehead. ‘You’re creating a nice world for yourself. That makes me very proud.’

  ‘Thank you. Oh and I called the Dogs Trust up, by the way.’

  ‘To check up on your little stray black dog?’

  ‘Yeah. Every time I walk down our street, I half expect to see him. I can’t get him out of my head. Which is ridiculous because I barely knew him. So I thought, maybe I’ll adopt him. Give him a home. I asked Mam and Dad; they said it was OK with them, as long as I was in charge of any poop situations. And Dad didn’t even bang on about the exercise opportunities that walking a dog would give me. I could see him practically holding his hand across his mouth to hold in the lecture!’

  ‘Poor Stephen! But that’s great news!’

  ‘Not really. Another couple have already fostered him, with a view to adopting last week. I should have called before we went away. I left it too late.’

  ‘Ah, that’s a pity. Will you get another dog, do you think?’

  ‘Dunno. It was him I wanted. What about you, Uncle Ray? Have you been still eating the specials every day? Mixing it up a bit?’

  ‘I had a Thai chicken curry yesterday, I’ll have you know. Had heartburn for the night. But don’t worry, I’m not going back to the way things were.’

  Greta grabbed his phone and started to swipe through the apps. ‘Well, first things first, I’m going to get you loaded onto Tinder.’

  ‘That’s never going to happen.’ He grabbed his phone back. ‘But I have a plan. One of the lads in work told me about this friendship club he’s in. A place where singles can get together with other singles. They go to the cinema, or for a drink, do a table quiz, that kind of thing. You probably think it’s lame.’

  ‘I don’t think it’s lame at all. I actually think it’s very cool. And if I were going onto a table quiz, I’d want you on my team every time. Nobody knows more useless information than you do. And that’s surprisingly helpful in a table quiz.’

  ‘Well, as it happens, I’ve agreed to go with him to a table quiz on Friday night. The way I see it, it’s better than sitting in on my own.’

  ‘Brilliant. Jeepers, look at the time. I’d better go. I’m meeting Dylan in a bit. He’s got this idea for a song he wants to run by me.’

  ‘My boyfriend is so talented, I really love him …’ Ray teased. ‘Go, live, love, have fun. I’ll see you at the weekend.’

  As Ray watched his niece run out the door of the pub, he could hardly recognize her from the woman she was only a f
ew months ago. She was going to be OK, he was confident of it. He made his way back to the office and found himself humming ‘Pure Imagination’ once more. But this time, it didn’t irritate him. He wasn’t going to stop until he had created a world for himself that he wanted to live in.

  And just when he stopped looking for her, she was there, standing outside his office. ‘Billie.’

  ‘I’ve been waiting for you.’ She moved closer to him, and he breathed in her scent. He held her in his arms, and she clung to him.

  ‘Thank you for your messages. And for the flowers you sent for Mama’s funeral. I’m sorry I didn’t answer sooner.’

  ‘How did it go? Sorry, stupid question. I’m sure it was horrendous.’

  ‘It was, as all funerals are, sad. Horrifically sad. She’s back with Dad again now. Buried side by side.’

  ‘Did Piper go to the funeral?’

  ‘She did, and announced that she is getting married again.’

  ‘Number four?’

  ‘I think so. It’s hard to keep track, to be honest.’

  Despite the ordeal of the previous few weeks, Billie looked well. And Ray felt his heart flutter in the way it always did whenever he was near this woman. ‘Why are you here, Billie?’

  ‘To apologize for being so horrible to you.’

  ‘You were in shock over your mama, so no apologies necessary.’

  ‘Even so, you deserved better. I figured I owed you an explanation. I realized something after we lowered Mama into the ground. I lost you twenty-four years ago because I was lost myself. And when you came looking for me, I thought, this is it. A second chance. And you helped me navigate my way back. Our time together on that road trip was the best time of my life. It was life-changing.’

  ‘For me too,’ Ray said. ‘For all of us.’

  ‘I know that I kept saying to you that I wasn’t the same girl you used to know. But over the week, I began to think that maybe we could go back to that time and find a new “us” again. But Ray, I’m so sorry, I love you, I really do, but I don’t want to be with you.’