The Academy of Underachievers: Year One

by Alex Dafney

  Stepping outside onto the top of the stairs, he pauses, lifting his hand and pointing up.

  My eyes follow his finger, looking up to the gargoyle that taunted me before even stepping foot inside the building. The gargoyle scowls down at us, exaggeratedly rolling his eyes.

  “That’s Rufus. Don’t mind him. He’s a total ass.”

  I giggle as Rufus lifts his paw, giving Jet the best middle finger he can. Glancing over as he chuckles, I find an adorable smile on his face as he waves up to the gargoyle, pointedly antagonizing the creature.

  His eyes meet mine, giving me a charming smile as he holds out his arm bent at the elbow. Without hesitation, I hook my arm through his, walking down the steps side by side.

  “This is known as disappointment drop-off drive. It started as a joke about the parent’s facial expressions on moving day, but the all too appropriate name has stuck around for years.”

  I frown at his statement, instantly remembering the look on my dad’s face as he dropped me off at this very curb earlier today.

  Jet places his hand on my arm that is linked through his, giving a gentle pat. “Chin up, Briar. Not everyone here is a disappointment to their family, and I have a strong suspicion you landed here accidentally.”

  I shrug my shoulder, looking up at him as he smiles down at me. “I thought I sent my applications into the prestigious academies, only to realize a short week ago they had fallen between the seat of my car. This was my only option on such short notice.”

  He urges us forward, not commenting on my mistake. We walk along the sidewalk that spans the front of the building.

  “I come from a long line of Underachievers.”

  Looking over to him, I detect a slight scowl as we continue on our trek. I follow his hand as he lifts it, pointing upward.

  Narrowing my eyes, I stare at the woman on the roof who wears a long purple cape.

  “That’s Mistress Penelope. She’s a witch who offered to teach here instead of being detained by the PEA.”

  He looks over to me, a smirk on his lips. “That stands for Paranormal Enforcement Agency, in case you weren’t aware.”

  I scoff as I pull my arm from his. My parents have been grooming me for this position since I was five years old, and I’m confident I know more about the ins and outs of the Agency than he ever will. “I know what it stands for.”

  He chuckles lightly as he bumps his shoulder into mine. “I know.” His eyes move back to the roof, me following his gaze.

  I come to a stop as I watch Mistress Penelope tilt a vast cauldron over the side of the roof, the contents spilling along the weathered shingles and bubbling as it turns to a bright pink goo that clings to the building.

  “Penelope is a wonderful teacher, but she’s a little, uh, spell happy, shall we say?”

  Moving my eyes back to Jet’s, I find a playful smirk on his face.

  Just as I open my mouth to question what he means, my eyes widen as the pink gooey concoction begins to rain down around us, bouncing off the pavement and shooting straight back to the sky. Covering my head, I run from the front of the building toward a wooded area to seek cover. I halt as Jet grips my arm firmly, stopping me from entering the woods.

  His brows draw together as he points toward the forest, keeping the firm grip on my arm. “You never go in these woods alone. Understand?”

  I nod my head quickly, although I’m unsure of why. He turns his head back toward the school, my gaze following his as we watch Mistress Penelope dancing along the roof, catching the balls of goo in a baseball mitt.

  “What the hell?” I mumble as I shake my head, utterly confused.

  Jet moves his eyes to mine, giving a good-hearted laugh as he removes his hand from my arm. “What can I say? She’s bat shit crazy, and she loves slime as much as any small child.”

  He turns from me, stepping toward the wooded area he just warned me not to enter.

  “What are you doing?”

  Glancing over his shoulder, he gives me a coy grin, holding his hand back for me. “You can’t enter the woods alone.”

  I glance from his outstretched hand to his charcoal eyes, mentally debating what my next move should be. Gingerly, I lift my hand, placing it in his.

  We start down a narrow trail into the dark forest, me gripping his hand tightly and moving into his personal space as my wide eyes dart around nervously. Just waiting for something big and scary to come and gobble me up. My shoulder rests against his arm as we move further into the wooded area, him chuckling lightly as he squeezes my hand.

  “Nothing is going to jump out at you.”

  I let out a small sigh as I try to pull my hand from his, but he grips my hand, refusing to let go.

  “Don’t let go of my hand. Otherwise, they’ll think we’ve come to speak with them.”

  Just as I turn my head, looking up to him to question who he’s speaking of, a ghostly figure materializes before us on the small path.

  “Hi! How are you? What are you doing? Is this your girlfriend? She’s pretty.”

  Another figure appears next to the small girl who continues to babble.

  “Hey! Have you had dinner? What’d you have? I miss food. Did you have spaghetti and meatballs? I love spaghetti and meatballs!”

  My eyes dart back and forth between the shadowy figures as more join them at a rapid pace. The questions are beginning to sound like a hum as they all speak at once, causing my ears to ring.

  “We’re not here to socialize today, merely passing through.” I look up to Jet, who has his hand up, palm facing the crowd that has formed before us.

  They all mumble quietly as they begin to dissipate.

  Jet tugs my hand, pulling me forward along the trail. “That’s why you don’t come in here alone. The ghosts are lonely. They’ve been talking to each other for the last few decades, and when a newcomer comes along, they can’t wait to find out what’s going on in the current world.”

  He laughs lightheartedly. “Luckily, they do have manners, and us seeming like we’re on a romantic stroll through the woods halts the questioning.”

  My cheeks burn with a blush as I keep my eyes on the ground.

  “And that’s the end of the haunted ghost trail.”

  I lift my eyes to see sunlight breaking through the thick limbs above us as we step out the other side of the forest.

  Jet instantly releases my hand, lifting his and pointing to something in the distance. “That’s the bar where the students who are of legal age go and drink on the weekends. Also, the same place the students with fake identification go.”

  I nod as my gaze rests on a large metal building that sits on a hill a measurable distance from us.

  Jet begins to walk along the edge of the wooded area, me jogging to fall back into step with him.

  “If you need identification, Robbie, in 207, should be able to help for a small price.”

  His steps begin to quicken as he glances down at the watch on his wrist. Lifting his hand, he starts pointing to areas as my eyes and ears try to keep up.

  “That’s the back quadrant where the Pep Rally’s are held if there is one. Over there is where the not so annual bonfire will or will not take place. Student parking is located in the underground parking facilities, just to the left of the main entrance, and over that hill is where we sacrifice the student with the highest GPA at the end of each semester.”

  My eyes widen as I stop abruptly.

  He pauses, looking over his shoulder to me with a snarky smile. “I’m kidding, just wanted to see if you were listening.”

  I roll my eyes as I start forward, us falling into step next to each other again. As we round the edge of the tree line, the back of the school comes into view.

  Jet stops suddenly, turning his body toward me fully as he smiles down at me. “I hate to cut your tour short, but I had already made prior plans since I didn’t expect anyone to show up.”

  I wave a hand toward him nonchalantly. “No problem. Maybe I’ll see you a
round if you show up to classes.”

  He chuckles lowly before looking over to the stairs that lead down to the back quad. “Yeah. Maybe.”

  I follow his gaze, finding a young woman with beautiful flowing dark hair standing on the top step, tapping her foot impatiently with her arms folded over her chest as she glares in our direction.

  I move my eyes back to him, understanding the situation instantly. “Thanks for showing me around.” I rush away from him, following the edge of the tree line toward the front of the building so I don’t have to pass by his girlfriend on my way inside the building.

  “Room 303 if you ever need it.”

  I glance over my shoulder, not breaking my stride as I give him a puzzled look.

  Jet holds up his hand, displaying three fingers, then forming an ‘o,’ then three fingers again before breaking into a jog toward the back of the building where the dark-haired beauty waits for him.

  Facing forward, I quicken my stride, shaking my head at myself for thinking the cute upperclassman could possibly be interested in me.

  Chapter Two

  Standing in front of the broken mirror in my bathroom, I attempt to apply my makeup correctly in the small sliver of glass in the corner. I’ve been here three days, and my room seems to become worse by the day.

  The sink in the bathroom leaks, the string I hung across the bathroom to hang my clothes keeps falling, the shower doesn’t know what hot water is, and the constant banging of pipes has me averaging a few short hours of sleep a night.

  Still, I smile at my reflection as I place the wand in my tube of mascara.

  Today is the first official day of school, and I plan to be the best student possible at the Academy of Underachievers. I glance down at my outfit, a pair of skinny jeans, spaghetti strap shirt, and a pair of wedges adorn my feet.

  After looking at the school handbook, which is basically a blank pamphlet, I decided on my go-to outfit for a confidence boost. The dress code doesn’t specify any violations, other than streaking through the back quad, so I figure I’m safe with this.

  Tossing the mascara to the sink counter, I turn, striding into my bedroom. Grabbing my bag from its place on the edge of my wonky desk, I sling it over my shoulder before marching toward the dorm door.

  Stepping out into the hallway, I yank the door closed behind me. Yet another issue with room one hundred is the faulty door. Sighing, I hoist my bag on my shoulder, making my way toward the spiral staircase in search of my first class.

  I quickly make my way up the stairs, stepping off on the fourth floor, and moving through the empty hallway toward the room number on the simple sheet of paper of my class schedule that was slipped under my door last night.

  Stopping at 402, I place a bright smile on my face as I put my hand on the doorknob, turning it and pushing the door open. My smile falters as I find a dark, empty room. Running my hand along the wall inside the door, I flip the light switch upward, illuminating the large room. One table sits in the center of the room, a few chairs surrounding it.

  I walk inside, dropping my bag to one of the chairs as I slide out the one next to it, sitting and facing the front of the room. I stare at the chalkboard as the minutes tick by on the clock that sits above it. Introductory to Investigation is scrawled in intricate font along the top of the board.

  After twenty minutes, I fold my arms on the desk, dropping my head down with a groan. No one is going to be teaching this class, and no one is going to be showing up to be taught.

  “Are you lost?”

  I jerk my head upward, my eyes wide as I stare at the man who strides into the room, a satchel hung on his shoulder and a cup of coffee in hand.

  “Uh, no sir. I’m here for class.”

  He draws his brows together tightly as he places his bag behind the table that faces me. “You realize you’re at the school for underachievers?”

  I nod as I rise from my chair, walking toward him with an outstretched hand.

  He grips my hand firmly, giving a gentle shake.

  “Yes, sir. I may be your only student, but I’m eager to learn.”

  He gives me a confused look as we drop hands.

  “I’m Briar Knotwood. Freshman.”

  He nods his head slowly, gesturing his hand toward the table behind me where I previously was seated. Turning, I stride back to my seat, pulling a notebook and pen from my bag.

  “Briar, you say?”

  I nod eagerly.

  He lifts his paper coffee cup, bringing it to his mouth and tilting it back, draining the contents. Lowering the cup, he looks over to me with a small smile on his lips as he tosses the container toward the bin next to his desk. “I’m Ryan. The teacher of Introductory to Investigation, although I probably shouldn’t hold the title of teacher since I’ve never had a student at this place.”

  He walks over to his desk, propping back on it, his arms extended behind him. “You do realize you’re not required to be here? Grades mean nothing, attendance as well.”

  I nod at him as I hold my pen above my paper, ready to take notes.

  He chuckles as he pushes himself off the desk, walking toward the chalkboard. “Welcome to Introductory to Investigation. In this class, you will learn the basic skills of investigating paranormal crimes.”

  I quickly write everything he says as I glance from my notebook to the chalkboard.

  An hour later, Ryan places the piece of chalk on the bar that rests below the board. “That’s all for today.”

  I close my notebook that sits on the table, rising from my chair and grabbing my bag.

  “Are you planning to come to class every day?”

  I glance over to him with a puzzled look on my face. “Um, yes, sir.”

  He shakes his head slowly as he stares at me with a puzzled look. “Why did you apply to this school if you truly want to learn about the field?”

  Hoisting my bag on my shoulder, I let out a low sigh, beginning to explain my mishap with my college applications.

  He nods his head. “Well, welcome to the Academy. I’ll do my best to be on time for our next class.”

  I give him a small smile as I stride by him toward the door. Entering the hallway, I find it once again deserted. Pulling my schedule from the side pocket of my bag, I glance down at it as I walk toward the stairwell.

  “Oomph.”

  I stumble back as I collide into an immovable object. A hand grips my arm to steady me as I look up to find what, or who, I’ve ran into while distracted.

  Jet gives me a kind smile as he looks down at me, removing his hand from my arm. “Good morning.”

  I give him a small smile as I nod my head in a cursory manner. “Hi.” I begin to step around him to search for my next class, but he steps in front of me.

  “Why are you in the classroom hall?”

  I let out a sigh, already tired of being questioned for wanting to attend classes. Looking up to him, I arch one eyebrow up in annoyance. “I’m going to class. I know it’s hard for everyone at this school to understand, but if I’m going to be able to transfer out of here come spring, I need to learn what I can.”

  His lip quirks up to one side. “You don’t sound like an Underachiever.”

  I scoff as I move around him, stalking toward the stairwell. “That’s because I’m not,” I reply without looking back to him. I place my hand on the railing, moving up the stairs toward the fifth floor.

  “Are you going to the bonfire tonight?”

  Pausing in the middle of the staircase, I glance over my shoulder, giving a small shrug. “Is there actually going to be a bonfire? Or will the students around here blow it off just like class?”

  He chuckles lightly, lifting his hands to his side and giving an exaggerated shrug. “You never know. We are talking about a bunch of underperformers after all.”

  I roll my eyes as I begin to move up the stairs. “I may.”

  As I take the last step, turning right toward my next class, I contemplate attending the bonfire. It may
be an excellent way to make a few friends since I’m surely not going to be making any in classes.

  Stepping in the doorway of room 516, my eyes widen as I see the students all sitting in beanbag chairs scattered around the room. My brows draw together as I make my way toward one, noticing all the students are males. Dropping my bag to the ground, I sink into the seat, wiggling to get comfortable. Looking over to the boy who sits closest to me, I give him a small smile. “Hi, I’m Briar.”

  He thrusts his hand toward me. I lift my own, placing it in his large hand and giving a small shake.

  “Colton Price. What are you doing in this class?”

  I sigh as I pull my hand away from his. “Why does anyone go to class? I’m here to learn the material.”

  He laughs lowly. “No one in this room is here to learn.”

  I give him a puzzled look, opening my mouth to question his statement.

  “Good morning, my harem!”

  I turn my eyes toward the front of the room at the sound of the alluring voice, my eyes widening as I take the woman in. She’s very tall, even taller in her black platform stilettos with silver spikes adorning the front. Her corset-style top leaves little to the imagination with her breasts pushed upward, and her bright red shorts can be described as none other than booty shorts.

  Her eyes lock with mine, a scowl coming to her beautiful face. “What are you doing in my classroom?”

  I open my mouth, but she waves a hand toward me, dismissing me before I can even begin.

  “Never mind. I simply don’t care.”

  She strides over to the desk that faces the room, hopping up on the top and resting back with one hand outstretched behind her. Lifting her legs, she places them up in a seductive pose as she smirks at us.

  “Welcome to Introductory to Avoiding the Temptation of Witches. I’m Mistress Aurelia, and I’ll be your witch this semester.”

  She drops her legs to the ground, rising on the high shoes and stalking toward us, stopping in front of Colton, who sits next to me. Bending at the waist, she gives him a flirty smile as she lifts her hand, trailing her long, black fingernail over his jawline.