He took more time than he needed in the washroom as he stared at his reflection in the mirror. There were no easy answers. She needed money, but refused to take it from him. She needed work that fed her soul, just like he did. He got that. It was one of the many reasons he loved her.
His thoughts were torturing him as he made his way back to the bed.
“What are you thinking?” she asked, shifting so she was tucked in to his side. “And don’t say nothing, Deke. I can practically hear the thoughts racing through your head.”
He’d never lie to her, so he said, “I was thinking about how we can make this work.”
She sighed as she curled her arm around his waist. “It’s so damn frustrating. I want to be with you. You know that, but—”
“You need a purpose, and a way to take care of yourself. I know.”
It would be easy if Harper was like one of the many women he’d dated over the years, content to live off his millions. But if she was like that… she wouldn’t be Harper. Strong, independent and the kind of woman he’d be proud to call his wife and the mother of his children.
“Let me ask you something,” he said, linking his hand with hers. “If we got married, everything I have would be ours, not just mine. Would you be okay with us paying off your student loans then?”
She shook her head. “No, no way. You earned that money and—”
“Dammit, Harper.”
He was trying to rein in his frustration, but she wasn’t making it easy. Money meant so little to him now that he had plenty, and he refused to allow that to be the thing that came between them. He understood her need for a career, but it was stupid for her to work her sweet ass off paying back her student loans when she didn’t have to.
She raised her head, looking him in the eye. “You really don’t get it, do you? Why this is so important to me?”
He wanted to, but he couldn’t understand how she could claim to love him so much and not let him do this for her. “Honestly? No, I don’t. If you let me pay off your student loans, that would be one less thing for you to worry about. You could move in with me, so you wouldn’t have to worry about living expenses, and you could take your time finding a job.”
Even as he suggested it, he knew that plan would never fly. Harper wasn’t looking for a knight in shining armour to rescue her. She wanted an equal partner, and that meant she had to feel she was contributing as much to their relationship as he was. Little did she know she’d already given him so much more than she realized. She’d made him happy again, and that was priceless.
“I can’t.” She closed her eyes as she fell back against her pillow. “I know you think I’m being difficult, but put yourself in my position. How would you feel about yourself if I was the one making all the money, offering to…” She cleared her throat before wincing, “Ugh, rescue you?” Her hand flew up before he could respond. “You don’t even have to say it. I already know. You’d hate it.”
When she put it like that, of course he would. But he didn’t see their situation the way she did. He’d grown up dirt poor and his real estate business gave him financial security, plain and simple. His tattoo shop satisfied his creative spirit. But Harper, she soothed his soul. She made all of the pieces in his life fit together, where before they’d just been a bunch of jagged edges, some too big, others too small. But she served as the anchor that all other pieces slid into effortlessly. He only wished he fit into her life as easily.
She rolled on to her side, facing him. “Deke, when I’m in the classroom, with those kids, I feel alive.” She smiled. “Seeing their little faces in the morning brightens my day. Their questions, their curiosity and excitement about learning…” Her smile spread, making her eyes sparkle. “It’s what I was born to do. Even the bad days are better than the best days at any other job I’ve ever had. Can you understand that?”
“Of course.” He felt the same way about his work. Seeing his work of art decorating someone’s skin, knowing it would be with them every day for the rest of their lives, gave him a sense of satisfaction that no other job ever could. Real estate made him rich, but being a tattoo artist made him who he was.
He linked his hand through hers. “I love that you’re so passionate about what you do, baby.” He leaned in, kissing her. “Seeing you with my nephew, it’s obvious that you’re amazing with kids. And I am sure that your students are crazy about you, year after year. But I’m crazy about you too.” It had been years since he’d laid it on the line with anyone, not since his last go ‘round with Harper. And it was scary as hell. “But they don’t need you. I do.”
“I need you too.” She curled her hand around his jaw, rubbing her thumb over his stubble. She sighed. “But I checked my phone when you were in the washroom just now and the interview requests have started rolling in.”
That was the last thing he wanted to hear. “Oh yeah? Don’t suppose there’s anything nearby?” Stupid question. Her eyes wouldn’t be filling with tears if she planned to stay in Carlton. “Guess not.”
“I hate to do this,” she said, swiping at the tears sliding down her cheeks. “But, um, do you think Mrs. Reynolds could watch Drew for a few days so I could go to these interviews? I wouldn’t ask if it wasn’t important, but I really do need a job come fall.”
He couldn’t hold her in Carlton against her will, as much as he might want to. “Yeah sure, don’t worry about us. I’ve got it covered.”
***
Six interviews in three days and Harper was still reeling. They’d gone well. Really well. She had no doubt she’d be getting call backs. More interviews. Probably a job offer in a few short weeks. A job offer that would take her hundreds of miles away from the man she loved. Her best friend. And the life she could have if she had the courage to stay. But what kind of life would it be if she was penniless, drowning in debt, and totally dependent on Deke for everything?
She was meeting Jude for coffee after an early morning text from her best friend demanding they meet as soon as Harper got back to town. She felt bad for not going to relieve Mrs. Reynolds right away, but after texting Deke she learned Drew was having a play date with friends.
“Thank God you’re back,” Jude said, looking stressed as she sat down across from Harper at a booth in the back of the town’s one and only diner. “I didn’t want to talk to you about this over the phone, but I have the best news!” She paused. “Well, I think it’s good news. I hope you’ll think so too. I know it’s not—”
“Would you spit it out already?” Harper didn’t mean to snap, but she was tired and confused, and already missing Deke like crazy. They hadn’t spoken since she left and she didn’t know what kind of reception to expect when he got home from work.
“Sorry.” Jude took a deep breath. “So I have a client who runs a day care centre in Lamar. It’s more of a pre-school, really. Kids aged 3-5, I think she said.”
“Go on.” Harper was trying not to get too excited, but she knew Jude would never set her up for disappointment.
“She’s a bit older. Close to retirement age, and she’s had the centre for, like, twenty years.”
“Uh huh.”
“She’s looking for someone to manage it, maybe take it over in a year or two.” Jude squeezed her hand. “Can you believe that? I told her all about you and she said you sound perfect! So, the job’s yours, if you want it?”
“But… I…” She couldn’t believe this. A job opportunity less than twenty minutes from home? Could she get that lucky?
“Don’t worry about Drew,” Jude said, holding two fingers up to order coffee from the waitress behind the counter. “I told Carolyn that you were watching your boyfriend’s nephew this summer and wouldn’t be able to start until September.” She chuckled. “And you’re not going to believe this.”
“What?”
“Deke is her landlord.” She rolled her eyes. “He owns the freaking building where she rents space for her business. Small world, huh?”
“Yeah, small world.” Harper was still tr
ying to process everything. Her best friend was giving her a way to stay, an opportunity to build a new life with the man she loved. The means to support herself and still work with kids. It almost seemed too good to be true.
“Why aren’t you excited?” Jude asked, frowning. “This means you get to stay! That is what you want, isn’t it?”
“Of course it is.” She smiled at the weary waitress who stopped by to fill their mugs. “I just, um, haven’t heard from Deke since I left, so I’m not sure where he stands.”
“Deke loves you, girl. Are you kidding me? He’s gonna be thrilled.”
Harper wanted to believe that, but there was only one way to know for sure.
***
Deke was sitting on a bench outside of his shop, taking a breather after a hectic morning, when the sun got a little brighter. Harper was standing over him, a smile curving her lips. That could only mean one thing: a job offer. Which meant the end of the road for them. He told himself he should be happy for her, but dammit, his gut was churning at the thought of letting her go again.
“Hey,” she said, sitting down beside him.
“Hey.” He wiped the scowl off his face, reminding himself not to be a selfish bastard. She’d worked hard to become a teacher and had earned the chance to put those skills to use in a classroom. “How’d the interviews go?”
“Good.” She nodded. “Really good, in fact.”
“Not surprised.” Anyone who met Harper loved her. “I’m happy for you, Harper. Really.”
He hadn’t touched her and she hadn’t reached out to him. If she planned to stick it out with Drew the rest of the summer, he had no idea how the hell he was supposed to keep his hands to himself, but he’d have to try. If they allowed their intimate relationship to continue it wouldn’t just be difficult to let her go. It would be impossible.
“So, um, you know that tenant you have in Lamar?”
He frowned. “I have a lot of tenants in Lamar. Which one?”
“A day care centre. Carolyn, the lady who runs it, has offered me a job.”
He shifted slowly, facing her, as he tried to process what she was telling him. “She offered you a job? In Lamar?” His heart started beating double-time as he wondered if it was possible for him to get that lucky.
“Yeah.” She set her hand on his thigh, looking up into his eyes. “It’s not teaching, but it is working with kids. She’s looking for a manager because she wants to cut back apparently. And in a couple of years she might be looking for someone to take over the business.”
He tried to read her expression. Was she making this sacrifice for him, for their relationship? She was over-qualified for the job she described and it probably wouldn’t pay as much in the short-term, but the future potential seemed promising. Would it be enough to make her happy… and want to stay with him?
“Say something,” she said, sounding nervous. “I want to know what you think about this.”
“It’s your decision.” He wanted to tell her it was the perfect solution, but he didn’t have the right to tell her what to do. “And your career. You’re a teacher. Are you sure this will make you happy? You won’t feel like you’re settling?”
Her eyes slipped from his. “I thought you’d be excited about this. Why do I get the feeling you don’t think I should take it?”
He swallowed, trying to find the right words. He couldn’t afford to screw this up, not with everything riding on her decision. “I think you should do whatever’s going to make you happy.”
She stared at him a long time before she said, “At the hotel you made it sound like you were looking for a solution to our problem. We have one and now you don’t seem too thrilled about it. Is that because you’re having second thoughts about us?”
“Goddammit.” He hauled her against his chest when he felt like he couldn’t breathe anymore. “Are you serious? No, hell no. Why would I be having second thoughts about us?”
She tipped her head back to look at him, her eyes brimming with tears. “I just don’t want to force—”
“Harper,” He silenced her with a kiss, “I love you, baby.” He looked into her eyes. “I. Love. You.”
She smiled, touching her forehead against his. “I love you too. So much. I just wasn’t sure where we stood. You went quiet the past few days and I thought that meant you’d already written me off.”
“I was just trying to give you some space to figure things out. I didn’t want it to seem like I was pressuring you.” Even though it was the longest seventy-two hours of his life and he slept with his cell phone clutched in his hand every night, in case she decided to call.
“I want this, Deke.” She kissed him, framing his face with her hands. “I want a life with you. But that’s not all I want.”
He brushed his cheek against hers while gripping the back of her head, taking it all in. This may be it… their chance. Finally. “What else you want, baby? Anything.”
“I was wondering if you could squeeze me in today.”
Their eyes met as understanding dawned. “You mean you want me to cover your tattoo?”
“I want his name gone,” she whispered. “And yours there. Where it should have always been.”
Damn. She was doing him in. “I can do that, if you’re sure?”
“More sure than I’ve ever been about anything,” she murmured against his lips. “But that’s not all I want.”
He smiled. “Oh yeah? What else can I do for you, beautiful?”
She traced a fingertip over his heart, outlining the general area of the tattoo bearing her name. “Can we piece this heart back together again? I hate to think of you with a broken heart, because of me. I want to see it healed and whole. Like us.” She brushed her lips across his cheek. “We may have been broken, Deke. But not beyond repair.”
“Never beyond repair,” he whispered, knowing that it would take time to mend all of the fractures that time and distance created, but this girl was his forever, so there’d be no shortage of time to heal.
Epilogue
One Year Later
Harper couldn’t believe one girl could get as lucky as she had. She was living with the love of her life, well on her way to being debt-free, planning her dream wedding, and now celebrating the grand re-opening of her very own business.
Carolyn had taught her everything she needed to know about taking over for her and Harper finally felt confident enough to pull it off. She’d even started implementing some of her own ideas to increase registration and hired two new staff members.
And her landlord had given her, uh, very favourable terms when it was time to re-negotiate her lease. She’d learned accepting help from Deke didn’t make her weak. It made her feel fierce, knowing she had a man like him to back her up, no matter what life threw at her.
And life had just thrown her an unexpected curveball.
Deke slipped his arms around her waist, kissing her neck. “I’m so proud of you, baby.” He looked around, admiring the changes they’d made to the centre while it had been closed for renovations. “The place looks great.”
She looped her arms around his neck as she kissed him. “I couldn’t have done it without you. I couldn’t imagine any of this without you.” She pulled him in close. “When I think of how different my life would have been if I’d married him—”
He growled, holding her tight. “Don’t. I can’t even stand the thought of you wearing that asshole’s ring.”
Deke had obliterated the memory of the ring she used to wear with a custom made two carat marquis that took her breath away every time she looked at it. “This,” she said, holding up her hand, “is the ring I was always meant to wear. And you,” she punctuated her point with a kiss. “Are the man I was always meant to marry. End. Of. Story.”
He grinned as he curled his arm around her waist and lifted her off the ground. “You know it, gorgeous. We may have taken the long way, but we got here eventually. That’s all that matters.”
He was right. In spite of e
verything that happened: the heartbreak and loss, failed relationships, secrets and lies, she wouldn’t trade any of it because it made them stronger as a couple.
“So, everyone’s gonna be here in a bit, huh?” he asked, setting her back on her feet and kissing her neck. “Wish we had a bit more time.”
They may not have enough time for what he had in mind, but they had more than enough for her surprise. “Everyone should start arriving soon. Jason and Jude should be here first. They’re picking up the cake and balloons on their way.” Her best friend was now engaged to her high school crush and they were moving in to their new house next week.
“Yeah, and my brother and Drew are picking up the rest of the stuff up from the party rental place, so we should be covered.”
Deke loved having his kid brother back home and Drew couldn’t get enough quality time with his daddy. That meant they had their apartment all to themselves again, except when they offered to babysit, which was often.
Deke teased her that they needed the practice, since he couldn’t wait to have one of their own.
“So, I did something,” she said, holding his hands in hers. “I hope you won’t be mad.” She prayed he’d be as happy as she was, but it would undoubtedly come as a shock.
“I could never be mad at you, gorgeous.” He smiled before kissing her, but his smile slipped when he felt the tension in her body. “Baby? What is it? What’s wrong?”
“I got a tattoo.” It was so much more than that, but he’d have to see it to believe it.
“You got a tattoo?” he repeated, looking stunned. “Why? I mean, if you wanted a tattoo, why wouldn’t you just ask me? You weren’t happy with the work I did on your other one?”
Using Rylee’s design inspiration, her tattoo had become a work of art. He’d added more flowers, enhanced the ones that were already there, and added a butterfly, concealing the name that never should have been, while weaving his own name into the design, just like she’d asked.
“I love it. It’s perfect.” She rolled forward on her toes. “But I wanted this one to be a surprise, for you. So I went to see Rylee and Nate.” Deke had introduced her to so many people in the tattoo community, but she and Rylee became fast friends, so when the time came to surprise her fiancée with a tattoo, she couldn’t think of anyone else she’d rather have design it.
Game Over (On the Wild Side #1) Page 12
