Hers From The Start: A Collection of First In Series Reverse Harem

by Laura Greenwood

  No. Neither one of them could really want me. I was only sixteen with no life experience… okay, well not completely true. I did have some life experience, just not the type that they would be looking for. Who needed a girl whose mother ran out on her and whose stepmother had rigid beliefs about the evils in today’s world and how girls needed to be “ladies of old” in the worst sense?

  “Come sit down, KK.” Kris’s face lit up as our eyes connected, but his still contained a hint of shadow in them from earlier.

  They both helped me to sit facing them. My back to the water ensured I would focus on them instead of the scenery. “I’m glad you had the blanket, Kris. This is very comfortable.”

  His hand gripped the bare skin of my crossed knee. “My mom, when she managed to come to my hockey games, usually drove straight from work and ended up cold in the arenas.” He rubbed his other hand along his clean shaven jaw. “My dad and I always made sure to have one in the trunk just in case. I guess, I just carried on the tradition.”

  The instinct to comfort him, despite the casual way he stated things, rose up inside me. Placing my hand over his, I leaned forward until I could place a soft kiss on his cheek. He didn’t have to say how much he loved his mother, I knew. It also wasn’t a secret between the three of us how he wished his mother could have watched him play more. But maybe now, with him possibly playing in the big leagues, she would be able to attend more games.

  “Thanks.” He winked and I smiled, relieved to see the sparkle back in his dark eyes.

  Ryan reached for my other hand and cleared his throat. I wanted to giggle at the way he squirmed, but my nerves were stretched too tight for even an inappropriate giggle to escape. “Well, you, uh, know I’m not the best with serious stuff. Usually shoving my foot in my mouth instead.”

  At that, a little giggle escaped. Ryan did have a way of always sticking his foot in his mouth. But I needed clarity, not platitudes. “Please, tell me,” I whispered as I examined the thread count in the weave of the blanket we sat on.

  “Kayla”—my face lifted to Kris’s at the use of real name—“like I said last night, I’ve liked you for years, but with hockey and the press the way it is, I needed to wait. But I couldn’t hold back any longer.”

  “Me, either, Kitkat. I should be waiting till next year, but the one year difference in our ages is fine. Besides, I don’t care what they think.” Ryan winked at me, unable to remain serious for any length of time.

  But I knew different. I could see it in Ryan’s eyes, how he worried about what we, they, were saying. And it only confirmed my fears. I wasn’t truly good enough for either of them.

  Kris squeezed my knee, pulling my attention back to him. “Last night, we told each other that we’d kissed you, not expecting the other to have done the same. At first, we were worried, wondering how you must feel.”

  As Kris stopped to breathe, Ryan jumped in. “But we noticed that neither one of us was concerned about the other did with you.”

  My head bounced between the two of them. I still didn’t understand what they were saying, but hoped that all this background stuff would help me to make sense of it all.

  “When we realized this, KK. We had to ask ourselves why?” His eyes held onto mine, asking if I still followed them. I nodded in hopes that I would soon get an answer before my heart left my chest to run a marathon without my body.

  “What Kris is trying to say is that we want to share you.”

  What? Share me? What did he mean by that? I wanted to pull my hands away from theirs, but they wouldn’t allow it. A restless energy tore through me instead, setting all my nerves on full alert. My chest began to ache as breathing stopped. Gray spots appeared in my eyes.

  “And this is why I should do the talking, Rye. You’ve scared her again.”

  Two warm familiar hands cradled my cheeks as another warm hand rubbed soothing circles on my back. “Breathe, Kayla please. Don’t freak out just yet. Please give us a chance to explain.”

  Kris’s voice pounded in my head, but I couldn’t make sense of his words. The soothing cadence of them though broke through my haze as I gulped in a lungful of air.

  “That’s it, Kayla, sweetie. Just continue to breathe for me, okay?”

  I nodded as his thumbs wiped away something on my cheeks. Had I been crying? Why?

  “What, Rye said is true. We want to share you. That means we both want to date you and no one else. You would be my girlfriend and Ryan’s girlfriend.”

  My heart thumped, stopped and then thumped again. But this time the racing was a carefree joyous one. Could it really be true? That they both wanted to date me and were willing to allow me to date the other one as well? It was everything in my wildest dreams.

  But, there was one thing I’d learned from experience… dreams did not come true.

  “H-how would you expect this to work?” Before we went any further, I needed to know. I already felt stirrings of the green-eyed monster when other girls hung off them, so how could they reasonably not feel the same. Moving forward with this only sounded like it would make the disaster and fallout uglier and larger when it all went up in flames.

  Ryan and Kris shared a look before returning their piercing gazes back onto me.

  Ryan shrugged his shoulders. “Well, we figured we’d let you lead.”

  “Do you honestly think this could work?” I couldn’t stop myself from asking. “What about jealousy? I mean, I feel it when other girls touch you.” The heat burned my face, but I needed to wear some big girl panties. I needed to show them I wasn’t too young. Not when I wanted to experience more kisses from both of them.

  “Ahh, I like it that you get jealous, Kitkat.” Ryan pulled me against his chest and kissed the top of my head.

  The heat of his kissed warmed me from top to bottom.

  “Rye, be serious.” I looked up at Kris to find him pinching the bridge of his nose in exasperation. When his eyes discovered mine, he dropped his hand, smiled with twinkling eyes, and drew me away from Ryan’s hold.

  “Jealousy could be an issue”—my heart froze—“but Ryan and I don’t feel that way when it comes to you.”

  My nose wrinkled as I tried to make sense of his words. The look on my face must have scared Ryan, as for once, he was the one to jump in and clarify Kris’s remarks.

  “Trust me, we get jealous, too. Why do you think I wouldn’t let that guy put sunscreen on your back? Why did you think none of the guys were asking you out? We made sure that they knew you were going to be treated as if you were our sister and there would be hell to pay if they touched you.”

  Kris ground his teeth, but I didn’t care. My face could not contain the width of my smile. They liked me. They really did. It didn’t even bother me that they’d been telling guys that I was like a sister to them because they did it to keep me for them.

  For the first time since I’d understood that I’d kissed them both, I could breathe easy. The rest of it didn’t matter, so long as I knew that they really did like me.

  “Are you okay with all this, KK?” The side of Kris’s hand smoothed my hair away from my face.

  I stared into his bottomless dark eyes and nodded. This, being with both him and Ryan, was everything I ever wanted.

  Chapter Seven

  Zippering up my small suitcase, I collapsed onto my bed next to it. I couldn’t believe how quickly the previous two weeks raced by. After our little talk, nothing really changed between the three of us, except for the kisses. Lots and lots of kisses.

  My lips tingled thinking about it.

  The one thing I hadn’t done. And I didn’t know how they felt about it. But I hadn’t kissed one when the other was present.

  The green-eyed monster occasionally continued to make its presence known when we were out in a crowd, but both boys were more considerate of their actions. They quickly removed the offender’s hand and sought me out to either whisper something in my ear, or even to touch me in passing. Just something to let me know that it
was me they wanted.

  We didn’t tell anyone that the three of us were dating, preferring to keep it our little secret. This was something I was grateful for. I didn’t want someone to accidentally say something when my dad arrived to pick me up. Somehow I knew, that having one boyfriend would have meant I would have hell to pay when I arrived home, but two? I shuddered to even think about it.

  But when we were alone… well… all those secret little touches that we did before we dated now took on a whole new meaning. And if two of us were left alone, it didn’t take long for our lips to find one another.

  Before we started dating, we seemed to be always together, either in a group or just the three of us. But now, we tended to find time for just two of us to be together. I wondered briefly if they had made up some type of schedule since they appeared to trade off. But the thoughts never amounted to much. I was too busy enjoying the private time and their lips.

  For once in my life, I finally understood what all the girls were talking about in the school locker rooms. Kissing was addictive.

  Aunt Susan knocked on the white wooden door jamb leading into my bedroom. “All packed up, my sweet girl?”

  Sitting up, I nodded as I hastily wiped away my traitorous tears. I always hating leaving here, but it was worse this year. Not only was I leaving Aunt Susan and everything else behind, but I was also leaving behind my boyfriends. Every year I hated to say goodbye to them, but this was different.

  Rushing to my side, Aunt Susan pulled me into a giant hug. “It okay to cry. I cry every year as well.”

  Sniffling, I pulled back slightly to examine her eyes. Never once had she cried in front of me when I left. Sometimes, it was the only thing that kept me strong.

  “But of course I cry, sweet girl. The moment the taillights from your dad’s car can’t be seen anymore, the tears pour out of me. In fact, Julianna usually comes over with supper so that the two of us can mourn our sadness together.”

  I snuggled back into her chest, unable to express my feelings verbally, but I thought she understood as she held me tighter.

  When we finally broke apart, she smiled as she wiped away the tears on her cheeks. “Now that I started early, how about you go say goodbye to the boys. I think they are all next door waiting for you.” A soft motherly smile full of love and pride graced her face as she stood up from where she’d joined me on my bed. “Besides, it will give me a chance to clean up and remove any trace of my tears before your dad arrives.”

  “Sounds good.” I stood up to follow her even as my feet protested. The last thing I wanted to do was to say goodbye. Maybe if I waited here in my room I wouldn’t have to.

  “They’re waiting.” Aunt Susan’s voice floated down the hallway, spurring me into action.

  Walking through the front door of the Scotts’ house was the hardest thing I’d ever had to do. My feet dragged along the wooden floors, trying to prolong my few moments of denial.

  “Kayla.” Brad’s arms wrapped me from behind, lifting me off the ground. With the strength he’d gained the past two years working out with some professional football players, he easily spun me in his arms until we were face to face. “It was so good to see you. I’m glad I made it home in time. I’m going to force your dad to take you to my game. And when he does, you have to come down to the glass during warmups so I can see you. Promise me.”

  I chuckled and promised, but I knew it was empty. There was no way my dad, despite all the junior hockey games we went to, would be allowed to take me to a professional game. My stepmother would have a fit.

  He shook me slightly from side to side as he grinned. “I see your lack of faith in me, but I promise you, it will happen. You will see me sometime before next summer and not on TV.”

  “If you say so.”

  He gave me another rib cracking squeeze before placing me back on my feet. A light kiss landed on the top of my head. “I’m going to miss you, kiddo. I really wish your stepmom would allow you to communicate with us.”

  I nodded, knowing there was nothing I could say. She had her quirks, especially related to how young girls should behave, and modern communications fell into that. She believed that dating should be arranged by the parents and with chaperones. Prior to that, girls and boys shouldn’t mix. Having a cell phone, email, or social media would allow that mixing to occur without her ever watchful gaze. It was only the fact that I would have to travel further on public transport that kept her from enrolling me in an all girl high school. I’d never been so happy with mass transit as much as I was the day we discovered that fact.

  Michael strode up next to Brad and held out his hand. “Goodbye, Kayla. I’ll see you next summer.”

  I shook his hand and pulled him in for a hug. Normally, I would have never been able to pull off that maneuver due to his size, despite the fact that he was younger than me, but Brad helped with an evil gleam in his eye. As Michael blushed but continued to hug me, I wondered if secretly he hadn’t wanted a hug all along.

  “Quit hogging, Kitkat, small fry.” Ryan tackled his younger brother, giving him a noogie as Kris pulled me out of the fray. Brad pounced on them, bringing them to the floor while exclaiming he was still the king.

  Both Kris and I laughed, although our laughs sounded forced, as he dragged me into the front living room.

  Wrapping his arms around me, he gathered me to his chest, enveloping me with his warmth and safety. It didn’t matter how many times I stood like this, I couldn’t believe my good fortune. To have his arms holding me, surrounding me, making me feel safe and secure… well, I wanted to pinch myself each time.

  His breath brushed against my ear raising goosebumps. “I hate that I’m not going to see you at all this year.”

  I bit my lip to keep the tears welling up from falling. Ten months, maybe eleven, that was how long I needed to survive without him. I didn’t know if I could do it. My shoulders shook as his hands rubbed up and down my back.

  “We’ll get through it, KK. I know we can. There has to be some way that we can get messages to each other.” Kris’s lips landed on the top of my head.

  Was there a way? I didn’t think so, but the words, the phrase he used triggered a new way of examining the problem. It seemed like forever, but his heart only thumbed a few times under my cheek when I thought of something. Tilting my head back, I searched his eyes. Did he really want to keep in touch? Would he think my idea childish? There was only one way to find out.

  “Messages. That’s the solution.”

  Kris’s eyes narrowed as he stared into mine with a blank look. The side of his hand brushed the hair away from my face before his calloused thumb caressed the skin under my eye. “I don’t understand.”

  “Ryan.”

  “You called?” Ryan’s arms slid around to my hips from behind as his chest pressed against my back.

  Tilting my head back, I offered him a wobbly smile. We’d found out earlier in the week that Kris would not be returning to his junior team which meant I wouldn’t be able to watch any of Kris’s games in person, no matter which team he played for. But, I would be attending every home game that Ryan played against our local junior team. “Ryan could bring me messages from the two of you to the games. And I could give him ones for the both of you.”

  Raising his eyes above my head, I understood Kris was having one of his silent conversations with Ryan. It used to make me feel excluded, but Kris’s fingers continued to toy with my ear, allowing me to know he hadn’t forgotten me. A slow smile spread across his face even as a small twinkle broke the fathomless depths of his eyes. “That’s a great idea. I think that will work. I always knew you were the smartest of the three of us, KK.”

  His face lost his smile as his gaze dropped lower, coming to rest on my lips. The weight of his stare set my chest on fire. Slowly, giving me the chance to tell him to stop, he lowered his face towards mine.

  I licked my dry lips and a groan escaped on a rush from his chest. Suddenly, his lips were clamped on mine, lic
king and nipping as they roamed. My knees became jelly. I didn’t even care that Ryan was watching this. In fact, I was grateful. If I hadn’t been molded to his chest with his hands on my hips, I would have been sprawled out on the floor from the intensity of Kris’s kiss.

  His tongue traced the seam of my lips, and then I was the one moaning, allowing his tongue to push its way into my mouth with a single thrust. While one of Kris’s hand drew small circles on my lower back, his other hand slid down my cheek to my neck until his large hand could control my movement. But his weren’t the only hands on me.

  Ryan, not to be left out, worked his hands between Kris and me until one hand warmed the area lying between my hips and the other pressed against me below my breasts, drawing me even closer to him.

  Why, oh why, hadn’t we done this before? Why had I been worried about kissing one in front of the other? Kissing one of them was a rush I’d never experienced before. But having two of them, both with their hands on me—even though only one was kissing me—was out of this world. My heart pounded, drowning out the sounds of our ragged breathing.

  Kris stepped closer, bringing his hips in direct contact with me. The hardened bulge behind his zipper had me stiffening under them both. I knew what it was and what it represented, but… I wasn’t ready. My body may have wanted to continue and fought against me, but mentally I knew I wasn’t ready to take such a huge step even if we’d had the time.

  He pulled back immediately and broke the kiss, bring his hand back to cradle my cheek. “I’m so sorry, KK. I wasn’t trying to push. I know you’re not ready. Heck, I’m not even ready.”

  My forgotten about hands released the handfuls of his t-shirt from where I’d held on above his waist band for dear life. I slid them up onto his chest between us until my right one rested over his heart. “I’m fine, Kris.” He snorted at my comment. “Really, I am. I don’t know why I acted that way. I knew something like that could happen.”