Heroes of Last Resort (The Other Guys Book 1)

by JK Galioto

  Chapter 16

  A few minutes later, Jack pulled his dagger out of the beast, cringing at the slime, blood, and guts that now coated both his arm and blade. It smelled worse than that time Grandpa ate an entire tub of Brussels sprouts while on a road trip to visit family in Cedar Rapids, Iowa. He moved over to check on Dobby, hoping against hope that the death of the basilisk would free the tiny goblin from his stone prison. Unfortunately, that was not the case.

  Letting out a long, slow sigh, he decided to skin the beast while he was already filthy, spending a few minutes to remove the grey, heavy scales and put them into his adventurer’s backpack. That done, he went over to the underground stream and cleaned his dagger and armor, then splashed the flowing water into the open cuts on his stomach and chest, wincing at the pain. It would take half a day to heal up again unless Jack could find something to speed it along.

  Returning to the statue, he once again chipped away at the pearl, glancing toward the large iron portcullis on the far side of the room and fervently hoping nothing else would bother him. A half hour and one destroyed poor-quality dagger later, the rough stone surrounding the pearl finally succumbed to his efforts and fell into his hands. He cast Analyze to confirm his hunch.

  Item: Portal pearl. Durability 50/50. Effect: These rare pearls are used to power gateways to other locations.

  Finally! Jack kissed the thumbnail-sized pearl, folded his arms in front of himself, and performed a merry jig. Getting ahold of himself a few minutes later, he stowed the pearl in his backpack. He then stared at the beautiful lady trapped in stone for a few moments before speaking. “On my word, I will be back. I will find a way to free you and Dobby.”

  Quest Offered: “Stone Prisons.” Free the Lady Latani and Dobby the goblin from their stone prisons. Reward: Increased relationship status toward Jack. 500 experience. As you made a vow, you must accept this quest. Penalty for failure: Breaking your vow can have serious consequences, including significant reputation decreases, loss of perks or titles, and permanent stat debuffs.

  He really had to watch his big mouth; he tended to speak before thinking. But he had no regrets; he would free them. Although, he had no idea how to do so; in the games he played it usually involved powerful magic that could turn stone back to flesh, but he could barely eke out the Analyze spell. Luckily, this vow didn’t seem to have a time limit.

  As if on cue, Alexa explained, “Vows in Rigara have a default duration of one year to be completed, unless otherwise specified.” Gah, my stupid tongue!

  Jack searched the rest of the room, moving between the boulders and finding several small creatures that had been turned to stone, including a few goblins and halflings. Eventually, he found what appeared to be the basilisk’s nest, a loose tumble of sticks, moss, and small, smooth stones. Scrounging through the nest, he found a few useful items, which he analyzed.

  You have discovered the spell book Burning Hands.

  Name: Burning Hands. Casting Time: 3 seconds. Spell Cost: 8. Cooldown: 20 seconds. Rank: Simple. Effect: Burning Hands shoots a small jet of flame ten feet from your outstretched fingers, doing 4-10 points of fire damage to anything it hits. Targets within the area of effect will receive an agility check to reduce the damage.

  The book was bound in red leather and had a symbol on its front cover of a hand, thumb and pinky outstretched, with lightning shooting between the two digits. Apparently, Daryl aspired to own many leather-bound books, and although Jack hated to admit it, the lair did smell faintly of mahogany.

  Name: Potion of Health Restoration. Effect: Instantly heals 3-12 hit points.

  Name: Potion of Mana Restoration. Effect: Instantly replenishes 3-12 spell points.

  He stashed the book and vials in his backpack, not sure he was up to the challenge of learning the Burning Hands spell at the moment. Readying to leave the large cavern, he pulled out his lodestone, curious to see if there was anything else of interest nearby. To Jack’s delight and horror, it tugged toward the large portcullis on the far side of the room. He would be coming back, but not before he got some help. His gamer intuition told him that going deeper underground always led to more and more ferocious mobs, and he didn’t want to press his luck any more than he had. No whammy! He knew there was a countdown clock ticking in the way of an increasing electromagnetic pulse back on Earth, but everything would be lost if he died foolishly. Although, truth be told, he couldn’t see himself dying any other way, and counted himself supremely lucky that he hadn’t already died more than once.

  Trying to be a little more circumspect, Jack dragged the basilisk corpse onto its nest, deciding to hide all the other corpses on his way back to the surface. Before he left, he stopped in front of the stone form of Dobby, who had given his life to save Jack’s. Sitting down, he pulled out his lute and thought up a fitting tune for his courageous friend.

  He brainstormed for the perfect song, not planning on stopping until he struck gold: “I Am A Rock,” “Everybody Must Get Stoned,” “Rock ’n’ Roll is Here to Stay,” “(I’m Not Your) Steppin’ Stone,” “For Those About to Rock,” “I Wanna Rock,” “Heart of Stone,” “Crocodile Rock,” and the theme to the motion picture Rocky. The idea train came crashing to an awkward halt. None of those songs encapsulated the sacrifice Dobby had made for him, and he wouldn’t cheapen it with a cheesy knockoff.

  Inspiration failing, he stood up and put his hand on Dobby’s shoulder. “I will be back, little dude. Not because some quest compels me, but because you were a friend, and you saved my life. Count on it like Shooter McGavin could count on Jaws waiting for him in the parking lot.”

  Putting the lute into his backpack, he strode from the room. He took his time coming back to the surface, hiding the goblin bodies along the way, finally emerging from the dark cavern into streaming sunlight. Only a few hours had passed since he went into the cavern, but it felt much longer. He spread his arms wide, feeling the sunlight and warm wind against his body, savoring every moment. He was sore and tired but wanted to return to the portal before daylight ran its course.

  He reviewed his notifications during the hike back.

  You have gained 1 point in stealth, small blades, dual wield, perception, acrobatics, and gathering creatures, and 1 point in Analyze.

  You have learned the trap making skill. You gain a +7 bonus to this skill based on prior experience.

  Did he just learn trap making from stumbling into a trap? I guess there is that saying about learning more from your failures than your successes. His background bonus must have been from the traps he had set with his grandpa, mostly coyote and fox traps set to protect the farm’s chickens.

  You have discovered a synergy bonus between Improved Hearing and stealth, granting a permanent onetime +5 bonus to your base stealth skill. You have attained apprentice rank in stealth and may choose one of the following perks:

  Armored Stealth 2: Decrease stealth penalty for wearing armor by an additional 50%, for a total of 75%. Normal penalties: Light armor 20%, medium armor 50%, heavy armor 100%.

  Fast Stealth 1: Increase speed of stealth by 25% per rank. Normal: Stealth reduces speed by 50%.

  Stealth Status: Gives you a real time stealth status bar that will allow you to know the status of your stealth skill when trying to stealth around others. Requirements: Danger Sense, level 4 Rogue, apprentice rank in stealth.

  The Stealth Status perk was just too good, and Jack instantly chose it before moving on to his next notification.

  You have learned the parry skill. The parry skill provides a bonus to parrying attacks directed at you. Many things affect the chance to parry, including the relative level of the two combatants and the weapon skill of the person you are trying to parry.

  You have learned the bluff skill. You gain a +14 bonus to this skill based on prior experience. You have attained beginner rank in bluff skill and may choose one of the following perks:

  Fast Talking 1: You can attempt to tell a lie to a target so quickly that it goes unquesti
oned. Doing so requires less time, but you take a 30% penalty on your bluff check. Each additional rank in Fast Talking reduces the bluff penalty.

  Feign Injury 1: Whenever you take damage, you can make a bluff check to convince foes that you have a more serious injury. Each rank in this perk increases the believability of your bluff and allows you to feign more serious injuries.

  Secret Message 1: You can convey a secret message to another person without others understanding the true meaning. The higher the rank in this perk, the harder it will be for others to understand the secret message.

  Jack had acted in high school, playing parts in both Oklahoma and My Fair Lady. He was no Meryl Streep; he wasn’t even a Mark Wahlberg, but he was apparently good enough to attain beginner rank in bluff. Before choosing a perk, he had a question for Alexa.

  “Hey Alexa, how does bluff work? How can opponents spot a bluff?”

  There was an immediate response, “Bluffing is opposed by your opponent’s insight skill. Every check has some randomness to it, but if your opponent’s insight skill is higher than your bluff skill, they will have a larger bonus to the check and an easier time spotting your lie.”

  Things were starting to make sense to Jack. The bluff vs. insight check was like his stealth vs. perception check. He assumed many skills would have a counter. Reviewing the perks, he decided on Feign Injury. Feigning an injury seemed like a natural complement to his critical strike and backstab abilities and would help make up for his low skill rating in small blades, as evidenced in the last two battles. Besides, he loved to blur the line between laziness and efficiency.

  You killed a level 4 basilisk. You receive 143 experience points. Congratulations, you have attained level 4 in the Rogue class. You gain 6 hit points, 6 stamina, and 1 spell point. You have 2 attribute points to assign, 2 skill points to assign, and must choose a class perk.

  Jack saw the same list of perks as before, except for Sense Danger, which he had taken at level two. He decided on the Linguistics perk.

  Linguistics: Special. Your natural aptitude for learning via ‘Knows No Shame’ allows you to learn the Linguistics perk. This perk gives you the ability to learn the basics of a language in a few seconds.

  His combat prowess was pitifully weak; he was nearly entirely dependent on hitting with his backstab or landing lucky critical strikes. But he was also about to bring over a friend to help him with the fighting. He decided to go with Linguistics; improving his ability to learn the languages on this world would pay dividends as he recruited allies to help him in his fight to save Earth and Rigara. He generally saw himself as someone skilled at figuratively getting the band back together.

  Closing out his notifications, he decided to assign his attribute and skill points. Looking at his attributes, he chose to place two points in charisma, moving that from thirty-three to thirty-five, or high to very high. He placed his two skill points into stealth, bringing it to twenty-seven, thirty-seven with the bonus from his boots, and began moving again.

  Chapter 17

  Jack reached the portal just before sundown. A brisk wind blew from the north, seeming to indicate colder weather to come. Shivering slightly, he pulled the deer skin tighter around himself while reluctantly moving toward the large tree that lay across the meadow. Slumping to the ground next to it, he leaned back against the tree and closed his eyes. It felt so good to just sit and do nothing. That would be his one grandmaster-ranked skill if it were a skill in this delightfully quirky world. He guessed his perks would include the ability to fart on an object and have it absorb the particles and associated smell. Scratch and Sniff was a likely name for that one. A low cough interrupted his internal monologue, and he opened his eyes to a truly surreal sight.

  “Jack! You aren’t dead!” This time MacGyver was before him, his long, righteous mullet waving slightly in the wind.

  “Can you at least pretend you’re not surprised to see me?” Jack asked, grinning tiredly. “Also, what’s with the MacGyver disguise? I made it into this world, you don’t have to use familiar memories to keep me at ease.”

  “I just thought you might want to see me make a bomb out of some duct tape, pencil lead, and paper clips—but your loss!” he quipped before reverting to his Dungeon Master form. “So, did you find a pearl?”

  Jack dug the pearl out of his bag and held it up to the diminutive figure who, after a brief inspection, nodded brightly. A notification appeared in Jack’s vision.

  You have completed the quest, “Pearls for Portal.” Repeatable. Reward: 250 experience, 250 gold. Ability to bring another Earthling through the portal.

  “Well done, Jack,” Dungeon Master said with a satisfied grin, returning the pearl to him along with a small sack of gold. “This allows you to bring another person through the portal from Earth. Choose carefully; they must survive the transition sequence, and portal pearls are as rare as words of wisdom from Alf!”

  Ignoring the quip, Jack asked, “Any tips on who I should choose? What helps someone survive the transition? Why was I able to do it where so many soldiers failed? And don’t you dare scurry your robed ass behind a boulder and disappear!”

  Shaking his head as if to pretend he didn’t just hear that, the otherworldly host responded, “Your mind is extremely adaptable, easily able to cope with the change. People that have a close connection with you will be more likely to survive the process, as your bond with them will help ease the transition. However, it will not be easy, and if they have rigid minds, they will have issues.”

  Jack took a moment to consider which of his gamer friends was most likely to survive the change. Topher and Geoe had creative minds and each in their own way really got into the roleplay of Dungeons and Dragons and could probably make the transition; besides that, Topher could cook! Gritz and Bo were engineers, which would be super helpful if he needed to create or upgrade some sort of defensive structure. However, what Jack really needed was a tank to dole out and absorb damage. Out of all his friends, Gooch fit that bill the best; he’d attended Harvard on a football scholarship and was one of the strongest and smartest people Jack knew. Joel and T were also strong in their own right with good physical backgrounds, but out of the three, he chose Gooch, who he thought would have the best chance of surviving. He had to do his best to minimize the risk his friends would be taking.

  He thought about bringing in some of his game store friends that played occasionally with him, but his bond was not as strong with those guys, and he had no desire to risk them at this point. If he brought his closest friends and still had more pearls, he would think about bringing over K-bro, Darrett, Melvin, Doug, Brent, and the others. No, the more he thought about it, Gooch was the right choice. Now, how do I go about getting Chad to send him through?

  An idea occurred to him, and Jack started a small fire near the edge of the meadow. He found bark from a nearby birch tree and peeled off a large piece of it, inwardly griping about the loss of the pen and paper he’d brought with him from Earth. After waiting for the fire to die down a bit, he used a stick and ash to write a crude message on the back of the birch bark.

  “Bro. I’m OK. Can port 1. Send Gooch.”

  Chapter 18

  Hoping desperately that his brother would have enough faith in him to send Gooch through, Jack approached the portal. There was a pearl-sized hole in the center of some intricately carved circular symbols roughly near the place where a doorknob would be. “Here goes,” he muttered, placing the pearl on the indentation and watching it vanish as the portal hummed to life, activating for the first time since Jack had come through, which felt like a lifetime ago.

  “You can send one inanimate object through the portal without using the charge, and only from this side,” Dungeon Master said, appearing at his elbow. Jumping in surprise, Jack shook his head, then pushed the bark through the doorway. Now it was time to be patient; not a virtue of his.

  “If and when Gooch comes through, let me talk to him first. Maybe I can help smooth the transition.”
After seeing a nod from Dungeon Master, he continued, “Something has been on my mind. How did the Ravanan Empire plan to attack Earth if this portal runs out of energy?”

  “There are other, more permanent ways to power the portal. Powerful magics that are well beyond your ken,” he replied mysteriously.

  “But not beyond your knowledge,” Jack responded, pleading with Dungeon Master. “If you helped, we could bring over all of my friends, and then we’d actually have a chance to win this war!”

  “I did what I could to help you, and that includes more than just giving you this trinket!” Dungeon Master replied testily, lifting his hand and levitating the lodestone necklace off Jack’s neck. “Do not take me for some conjurer of cheap tricks,” he boomed, his form growing into an eight-foot-tall version of Gandalf, lightning crackling behind him despite the cloudless, starry sky.

  Embarrassed, Jack sighed audibly. He eventually kneeled next to the portal, shame flushing his cheeks. “I’m sorry, Dungeon Master. I know you’ve gone out of your way to help me and my people. I’m just frustrated that I can’t do more and am worried about the size of the task ahead of me. I am not sure I can do this.”

  “Many people think that the first step is the hardest, but they are wrong. It is easy to promise yourself you will change and take the first step on the path. It is much harder to take the next step when difficulties arise. Why do you think so many people fail in their New Year’s resolutions? It is easy to form a resolution and adhere to it—for a while. When the inevitable first bump in the road materializes, it is then that we see how committed a person is to their goal. That is what I refer to as the ‘next step.’ Hold fast to your resolve. You have taken the first step; take the next one too.”