How to Love Your Neighbor

by Sophie Sullivan

“Night, sweet girl. We’ll see you soon,” Tilly said into her ear as she gave her a hard hug.

  “Don’t see why you get to keep all the leftover crisp. Tiny thing like you will never eat all that,” Morty said, coming in for his hug.

  “Why do you keep issuing challenges you know I can crush?”

  He hugged her tight. “You can crush anything you put your mind to. Don’t forget it.”

  She held on extra hard for another beat. “Love you.”

  “You, too.”

  She watched them walk to the old Ford pickup. Morty opened the door, waited with the patience of a saint for Tilly to climb up in. He made sure she was settled and seat-belted before he shut the door and rounded the hood. He lifted his hand as he got in.

  Grace waved back, crossing her arms over her chest, breathing in the cool, nighttime, salty air. The truck rumbled to life with several loud gurgles before he backed it out of the drive way. She stood on the porch another minute, looking over at Noah’s house. The lights were on upstairs. Everything else was dark. She didn’t know what to make of that or the way he’d bailed on tonight.

  Going back into the house, she reminded herself that she was in control only of herself and her own emotions. It would do her no good to try to figure out what was going on with Noah, playing guessing games. When they saw each other, she’d ask what happened. No big deal. She didn’t need to see him every night. Didn’t need him to check in or check up. She hadn’t been waiting by her phone like she’d seen her mother do more times than she could count. Nope. She’d had a great night, a good meal with her family, and she was going to bed happy.

  Picking up her phone from the mantel, she saw there were no new messages. She drew in a shuddery breath. Yup. She was going to bed happy. And alone.

  39

  What he knew about being a good man, he learned from his brothers and grandfather. All of them were men he admired, men he wanted to learn from. Though he was learning plenty about what kind of man he didn’t want to be from his father. His father would never own up to his mistakes or make things right.

  Pride didn’t make a man; choices did. He picked up the stack of paint chips, held together on a ring, put them in his back pocket, grabbed the coffee he’d run out for, and walked over to Grace’s house. Hopefully, she wasn’t still sleeping. Though, the way she was running herself ragged lately, he doubted she would be. She was multitasking like an Olympic medalist without a complaint.

  He took a few deep breaths after knocking, hoping like hell she’d forgive him for blowing her off yesterday.

  When she opened the door, his pulse accelerated. How could she always look so good? She was dressed in yoga pants and a T-shirt that read NOT NOW.

  “Hey,” he said. Nice opening.

  “Hi.” She eyed his coffee.

  He handed it over. “This is for you.”

  Her hesitation nicked his heart. He’d hurt her, and that freaking sucked. Reaching out, she took it from him.

  “Thank you.”

  “I fucked up.”

  Her gazed widened but she shrugged. “You texted to let me know. No big deal.”

  “Don’t do that,” he said. “Don’t let me off the hook. I bailed because I was in a bad mood. That was wrong. Last time, you told me the best way to apologize was to just say it. I’m sorry, Grace. And in case the words aren’t enough…”

  He pulled the paint chips from his back pocket, a rainbow of color samples, fanned them out so the words he’d written on them would appear. Her smile brightened his soul. Jesus. This woman was going to be the end of him. He couldn’t focus on anything but her when she smiled like that.

  The paint chips read: I’m sorry Gracie.

  She pursed her lips, nodding slightly. A soft sheen filled her gaze. Noah stepped forward, cupped his hand around the back of her neck.

  “I’m sorry.”

  “It’s okay,” she whispered, looking up at him. “For the record, this beats the small garden you bought me.”

  He laughed, leaning down to kiss her. “It’d be better if I didn’t keep doing things I needed to apologize for.”

  Again, she shrugged. “Obviously, something came up. It happens. Do you want to come in?” She pointed at the paint chips. “I get to keep those?”

  “They’re all yours.” He pushed them back into a stack and handed them over but didn’t come in any farther. “I actually wondered if you’d be up for taking a drive with me. If you have time.”

  “We have things scheduled for delivery this afternoon,” she said.

  “We’ll be back by then.”

  Grace stared at him like she was trying to read him. If any woman could. He hadn’t wanted to rub his bad mood off on her and her company last night. He never considered that it could work the other way. She was like sunshine drying the rain his father had cast onto his life. It was a terrifying realization. And an incredible one.

  “Let me grab my purse.”

  * * *

  He loved that she reached for his hand when they got in his truck and headed for the highway.

  “How was dinner?”

  She looked over at him. “Delicious. You missed out on my lasagna. I’m no gourmet but I’ve got that one down.”

  “I’m an idiot.”

  “Worse than you think. You missed out on Tilly’s apple-peach crisp.”

  “Any chance you saved me some?” He gave her a quick glance and squeezed her hand.

  “Maybe.”

  “What did they think of your place? They haven’t been there since the Trading Spaces thing. They like the couch?”

  She chuckled. “Morty thought it was weird. Tilly liked it. They were really impressed with everything. What happened yesterday?”

  He liked that she didn’t let him off the hook. As he drove, he told her about the two deals he’d lost out on, then filled her in on his golf game, which yielded nothing but a headache. Those men only wanted to put their money into things that would benefit them. They didn’t think another community center was worth their time. They reminded him of his father.

  “I’m sorry. That’s a lot of lousy things in one day,” she said.

  “Yeah. I wasn’t lying about my mood. I wasn’t in a good one even after the gym. I thought I could sweat it out but all that did was give me time to think about how hard I’ve worked to separate myself from my father without getting anywhere.”

  He switched lanes, grateful that the traffic wasn’t horrendous.

  “Why do you say that?” Grace picked her coffee up from the drink holder to sip.

  “Wes got back to me after my game. The two companies that turned down my bids did so because my father undercut me.”

  She gasped. “What? Do you think he knew? Of course he knew. Does he have any other properties in California? Why would he do that?”

  There was something about the way her tone changed, hard and protective, that did something all the working out in the world couldn’t achieve: it made him feel understood. Like he might be standing on the edge of a cliff but he wasn’t alone there.

  “All good questions. I do think he knew exactly what he was doing, and he has investments everywhere but these were very targeted. He wants to show me he’s still in charge.”

  “God. What is wrong with people? Parents are supposed to support you, push you to be better by showing you the way. They’re supposed to protect you and love you, not try to screw up your life to show you who’s boss.”

  Taking the exit for Anaheim, he glanced over briefly. “We still talking about my dad?”

  Her hand twitched under his. “Doesn’t matter. It just doesn’t seem right.”

  “It does matter. You matter to me, Grace.”

  “Are we going to Disneyland?”

  He wasn’t sure what to think of her sidestepping his declaration. Hardly a declaration, man. Coffee matters. Surfing, getting a good deal, and hanging out with friends matter. She’s more than that.

  “No. But we can another day, if you’d l
ike.”

  “Never been. I’d love to.”

  He smiled, thinking that he’d like to experience a whole world of firsts with her.

  “Then we’ll make a plan. Now, back to the conversation. Were we talking about just my dad?”

  She sighed, setting her cup down. “My mom phoned Morty’s trying to find me. Sent a couple more letters. She asked for money when I first moved and she’s texted a bunch. I haven’t opened the latest letters. I’m tired. I want to move forward. I don’t want to go back.”

  Taking a detour, he turned on Katella Avenue. “I get that.” He felt the same about his father.

  “People don’t change,” she said, so quietly he almost missed it.

  Noah didn’t answer right away. If he took a long look in the mirror, he wasn’t entirely sure he agreed. “I think they can. Given the right motivation,” he said.

  She started to say something but stopped, put her hand to the window. “Disneyland!”

  The excitement in her tone thrilled him. They were definitely going there together.

  “Another day. I promise.” The words fell from his lips as easily as they had the other night. Instead of making his stomach clench, they infused him with confidence. He would follow through. He wasn’t his father. The longer he was here, the more time he spent with Grace, his brother, and even Josh, the more true it felt.

  “I’ll hold you to that.”

  They drove in silence for several more blocks, Noah taking the turns he knew well. He’d checked the lot out several times, had Josh look into zoning. He’d applied for all the permits and talked to Kyle about the build. Now he needed backing. But before he got to that, which felt far off given how badly his golf game had gone, he wanted to share this with Grace.

  He wanted to hold up a mirror so they could see all of themselves but also each other. This was letting her all the way in. He hadn’t even shared this with Chris, and Wes knew only pieces.

  He pulled up to the abandoned lot. It was partially fenced in. The neighborhood surrounding it was middle class, with modest one-and two-story homes. It was centrally located between an elementary and junior high school. Apart from the palm trees and bright yellow shrubbery, it reminded him of New York. Of strolling with his grandfather through residential areas, looking at buildings. He hadn’t realized then how special those moments were.

  They got out of the car, Grace eyeing him quizzically. It seemed so natural to meet at the front of his truck, join hands. He leaned down, kissed her, his other hand moving to her hip. She fit against him so perfectly it should scare him. It would have, even a few months ago. Now it made him want more.

  When she pulled back, she reached up, brushed her fingers through his hair. “What are we doing here?”

  He turned, put his arm around her shoulder so they were staring at the land.

  “I want to do more than buy and sell. My grandfather was more than that. I’d hoped to do something similar in New York with warehouses I’d purchased. I want to leave a positive mark.” His cheeks heated. Why the hell was he embarrassed?

  “You want to make the community better even if it costs you,” she said, looking at him like he made rainbows appear from nothing.

  “I think, whenever you have a chance to give back, you should. It’s more than that, though. It’s hard to explain in words but I think I’ve gotten more out of hanging with Rob and those boys than I’ve been able to give back.”

  “You always underestimate your impact. You’re giving them your time. That’s a powerful gift in a lot of circumstances.”

  He smiled at her, squeezing her shoulder. “You’re right but it’s helped clear the fog I feel like I’ve been walking around in professionally. I bought this land. On my own. It’s the first thing I’ve bought without my father’s or brothers’ input. I want to build a community center. I thought I could get Sergio and his band of annoying men to donate but it didn’t work out how I hoped. But I’m not giving up. The three-on-three tournament will raise money for the San Verde center but there aren’t enough places for kids to turn to. I want to create one from the ground up. I was going to pay for the land outright with the sale of my warehouses in New York but my father blocked the sale.”

  “What?” She looked outraged, and it filled him with pride.

  He smoothed her hair back. “Simmer down, tiger. I’ve already come to terms with who he is. Mostly. This isn’t going to stop me.”

  She stiffened, visibly forced herself to loosen her stance in his arms. She touched both her hands to his chest. “Damn right it isn’t. I can’t wait to watch you do this, Noah. I have not one single doubt about your ability to pull it off whether we fundraise, hold charity events, or you borrow the money.”

  His heart snagged. “We?”

  She stepped closer. “Yes. We. I want in. You need to talk to your brothers because my guess is they’ll want to take part, too.” She frowned.

  “What is it?”

  “The magazine. There’s got to be ways to raise awareness and money. You’re doing this, Noah. I’ll be right by your side every step of the way.”

  Pride filled his chest so full it was hard to breathe. There was something other than pride, too, but he wasn’t going to look too closely at those feelings just yet.

  Noah wrapped his arms around her waist and lifted her off the ground, twirling them both. “You’re the coolest, Grace.” He pressed his mouth to hers, losing himself in the unique taste and pleasure only she could give.

  “You’re pretty cool yourself. And smart. So, I’m assuming you have a plan for how to go around your father to get the money from your warehouses?”

  He nodded. “I do.”

  “What is it?” Her eyes sparkled with excitement.

  “I have to go back to New York.”

  40

  Grace could not miss him. “It’s absurd,” she told Brutus, who had gotten a solo walk today. “We’ve only been apart one day.”

  Maybe she just felt like she missed him because she knew how far away he was. Or maybe you’re weak like your mother and depend too much on Noah to bring you happiness.

  Brutus barked, making it feel like he agreed with her last thought. She glared down at him. “That’s just cold, mister.”

  He barked again. Grace laughed, crouching down to pet him. “Kind of nice without the others, isn’t it, buddy?”

  Jumping up to her knees, he tried to give her a generous kiss. “Nope. I’m taken. Keep that tongue to yourself.”

  She saw the Blundstones before she heard them. From her crouch, she tilted her head back, locking eyes with Shane.

  “You’ve probably broken his heart with that news,” Shane said, reaching out a hand to help her up.

  Grace hoped her face didn’t show the embarrassment she felt. She let him help her up before slipping her hand out of his.

  He was such a nice guy. If Rosie wasn’t so gone over Josh, she’d have tried to set them up. How do you know he’d want to be?

  “You’re looking at me oddly,” he said with a laugh.

  “Sorry. Stuck in my own head. I haven’t seen you since we did the renos. Thank you again for your help.”

  He shoved both hands into his pockets. “No problem. It was fun.”

  They stood there awkwardly for a moment, and Grace wasn’t sure if she should fill the silence.

  “You good?”

  She nodded, letting out a sharp breath. “I am. I’m dropping this guy off and heading to class. There’s a job fair today with dozens of design firms pitching to the students. It’s pretty cool because it’s a chance to check them all out.”

  His eyes brightened with his smile. “That’s awesome. With the magazine, you’ll have a lot of options I’m guessing. Even solo if you wanted it.”

  She hadn’t thought much about that. She liked being around others. Rosie often pushed her creative boundaries, made her look at things differently.

  “Something to think about. But it’s good to know all my options. Don’
t want to put all my eggs in one basket so to speak.”

  Shane laughed, gesturing for her to go first up the stairs. “That’s very true. Baskets break.”

  He was absolutely right, but she’d been working hard to look at the opposite side of things. The positive.

  “Noah left me a voice mail. Any idea what he wanted?”

  Interesting. She could guess it had something to do with the community center but it was best to let him fill Shane in. “No. He’s in New York right now, though. He might have some project ideas he wants input on.”

  “Cool. I’m game. Tell him to call me when he gets back.”

  “I will.”

  He waved as he walked away. Would her life have been easier if she could have fallen for someone uncomplicated like Shane or was love—whoa. Shut that down. Were relationships naturally emotional cardio?

  It was a bit unsettling to realize she couldn’t make herself feel something she didn’t—that she couldn’t force herself onto the safe path. It made her almost understand things about her mother. Not everything. Everything after she had me was a choice. She could have chosen differently. Even if Grace had no control over her heart belonging to Noah, she was in charge of the rest of it and that’s where her mother let her down.

  After dropping off Brutus, she decided against stopping at Morty’s. Smiling, she thought about how he’d tell her to call first. She took the beach entrance to her backyard, hurried inside to shower and change. When she came out of the bathroom, she heard her phone chirping.

  Noah’s name popped up on the screen, giving her blood an extra pump of oxygen.

  Noah

  Landed safe and sound. Thinking about you. Have fun today exploring the job fair.

  He had a lot going on, and most of it was intricately tangled up personally and professionally. The fact that he remembered warmed her heart. She did miss him, but he was missing her back. It was okay to feel. She stared at the screen a minute, thinking about how much of herself to reveal.

  That’s it. You’re done second-guessing this. Have some faith. In yourself and him. If she kept waiting for one of them to disappoint her, how could she ever be all in?