Heart's Darkness

by H D A Roberts

  "Good eye!" Jones replied, "Yes, that took nine years to grow to its current state. We use it to make antidotes to the immortal conditions, Vampirism, Lycanthropy, things like that."

  "Really?" That was actually quite amazing.

  "Absolutely! I can even show you how. Though you might have trouble getting some of these reagents."

  That led to a discussion about potions that I won't bore you with. Potion making was yet another sub-skill of Crafting, and thus wasn't something I knew a lot about. Magic potions were hard to make, hard to store and uneven in effectiveness, but they had been known to be quite effective as curatives, and even for healing purposes, though that last one was often a bad idea. Healing potions tended to cause rampant, uncontrollable cell growth, which could repair damage, but could just as easily cause horrific tumours and lethal mutations.

  Flesh Magic was the better way to go.

  However, potion making could also lead to some interesting discoveries, assuming you could come up with the necessary volunteers to test your results. This was another reason Witches had a bad reputation; historically, they weren't too scrupulous about things like 'informed consent'.

  These ones seemed nice, though.

  "So, what do you need?" I asked, my mind packed full of new possibilities that would likely have to wait years for any sort of resolution.

  "What all Witches want, power," she said bluntly, "Oh, don't worry, we don't want anyone's body parts. What we need is research materials. Texts, rare herbs, some hard to come by reagents. But especially the texts."

  She had a list. A very long list.

  "I haven't even heard of these books. I'd imagine the Archive has them, though."

  "Of course. On Level five, where no Witch has ever been allowed."

  "Fair enough," I said, knowing how prejudiced the Archive could be, "I can't get you in, and they won't sell a copy of anything below Level Four for security reasons. I'll have to see if I can get it from a private collector."

  "We'll happily pay for anything you can get. Money's not the problem, it's the contacts. Nobody will sell to a Witch."

  I grimaced at that. Magicians did like to talk about equality, and they were pretty good at that, generally speaking, but sometimes they could be a rather unpleasant lot.

  "I will see what I can do."

  "Thank you! One of the most valuable parts of that book is a formula for making a potion that will rapidly replenish someone's Magical powers, using simple reagents, just certain plants and flowers. With that, we can stand alongside other Magicians as equals."

  That sounded fine to me, she just wanted the same chances as anyone else with a Well. Goodness knew I'd had my own problems with Magical Society, if there was something I could do to help these people make a better life for themselves, then I would.

  "And with more power available, we'll need someone to train us in more advanced Magic. Most of our powers are devoted to infusing solutions and simple projections of energy. We want to do more!"

  There was a flash of something like hunger in her eyes for a moment, but then it was gone. I dismissed it, thinking I must have imagined it. I was likely projecting my own desire for acceptance onto her.

  "Well, your best bet will be the standard texts. They're designed to provide a comprehensive education."

  "We don't want that simple crap! We want to learn. To understand real Magic."

  "Then read the government books. That's how I learnt, and they provide the foundation you'll need."

  She scowled, and again there was a flash of emotion that left as quickly as it came.

  "Look, I know it's tempting to use short-cuts. Magic is good at providing them, after all, but if you really want to learn Magic, as you claim, then you should do it properly."

  Her eye twitched for a moment, but she nodded.

  "I'll bring the first five levels' worth for you next time.

  "And the book from the list, as well, right?" she asked, almost desperately. I wondered if I was getting through to her...

  "If I can," I agreed, doing my best not to sigh.

  "Good. Then we can talk more in a week or so?"

  "Again, if I can. People don't necessarily like to sell to Shadowborn, either."

  Not that they would be, they'd be selling to Tethys and her band of stealthy lackeys, but the Witch didn't need to know that. I may have been willing to help, but that didn't mean that I trusted her with my secrets.

  "Good," she said, standing up.

  "Would you like me to start with some basic instruction? I've largely memorised the texts I've read, and I could start passing that on to your people."

  "Um... would you mind waiting until next time? If we have the formula, we can do this properly, but until we have an easy access to Magic, we need to hoard what we have, in case... well, in case, you understand?"

  I did.

  "Of course."

  "I'll introduce you around, though."

  And that was my evening. The Witches were a little stand-offish, not that you could blame them. Their experience with Magicians hadn't been great, and I hadn't been especially nice to the two I'd met...

  They seemed a reasonable, peaceful lot; very tight-knit, very loyal to one another. The stronger ones stood in front of the weaker or smaller when I came in, instinctively protective. I could respect that.

  I left feeling quite happy about my new contacts. The knowledge of potions and ingredients could be very useful to me some time down the road, and they'd promised to provide specifics later on, as well as the finished potions themselves and some rare plants when they could be spared.

  I was a little worried about Jones. I just got an odd impression from her. Perhaps she was just tired of her lot, and that of her sisters, but she just seemed a little... I don't know, desperate, perhaps is the right word.

  I hoped to be able to change that, in time.

  It would actually be a few weeks before I could get what she wanted, and she refused my offers to come around and do some preliminary teaching in the meantime. I thought that was a shame, but it wasn't like I could push the issue.

  When I finally arrived back at Naiad, I was lost in thought. That happened when I discovered a new branch of knowledge I wanted to play around with.

  Jocelyn had to touch my arm to snap me out of my reverie.

  "Hi!" I said smiling at her.

  "Hi yourself! I was wondering if you were in a daze!"

  "Sorry, just thinking. What brings you by?"

  "I have tickets to the Brighton Chocolate Festival on Sunday," she said, actually blushing.

  I smiled.

  "Would you like to come with me?"

  Beautiful girl, gigantic room full of chocolate...

  "Absolutely!"

  Chapter 19

  Even with everything that happened later, I still view that weekend as one of the best I'd ever had. Saturday was spent with Maggie, watching movies and arguing about the correct way to eat popcorn. I had quite a few female friends, most of the important people in my life, actually, but only with Cassandra did I feel that sort of... innocence, if that makes sense. There was such a complete lack of sexual tension, or any other sort, for that matter, that I could feel completely comfortable with her, talking freely with her about a thousand different things as we walked and ate between screenings.

  She finally told me a little about herself, how she'd been raised in Greece, sent to schools all over the world, learning a dozen languages and twice as many ways of fighting. She spoke of how she'd met Solomon, how he'd recruited her into his Champions.

  Even if the Champions had ended up a little evil, she'd done a lot of good in her time with them, fighting monsters on every continent, human and inhuman alike.

  She was a hero in every way, and I admired the hell out of her. She was what Cassandra would have been, if she hadn't had such a hard start in life. Maggie was a much... gentler soul, in her way. She was softer inside, sweeter (when she wasn't armed). It made me feel protective of her,
which was ridiculous, as Maggie could have bent me in half without breaking a sweat.

  She'd started having doubts about Solomon in the last two years, though. He'd started taking jobs against people whose evil was far from certain. Bringing the big Vampire into their group had very nearly been the last straw for her, but she'd trusted him, believed in him, even when he started including Hyde mercenaries against the larger targets.

  Even then, she couldn't leave, it wasn't her way. Her people attached themselves to causes or warriors; they gave their lives to them. She couldn't leave until I'd had given her an opening. And then she'd started to think back, to really examine what she'd been helping the Champions to do... and she didn't like what she'd become.

  She'd tried to attach herself to me, in that same way, but found me quite inadequate to the task. That meant that, for perhaps the first time in her life, she'd found herself with a choice, and she'd decided that she wanted to see the other side of the world, the side she'd been fighting for, but had always been separate from; the side with chocolate and movies and friendships that didn't involve blood and death.

  So, I suppose, in a way, she did attach herself to me. I'm all about that side of life. When I suggested that to her, she pushed me into a fountain, but she helped me out again. I took that as a win.

  When we eventually came to the end of our day, she gave me a hug, and wouldn't let go for a long time before promising to pick something fun for next time, and vanishing. Again, without handing me a phone number.

  The contrast between the simple friendship and pleasure of Maggie's company, and the innuendo and tension of the time I spent with Jocelyn, was quite jarring. But that was also a terrific day. We ate a light breakfast at the Compass Point Eater before making our way to the festival, where we stuffed ourselves to the point of immobility. And if you think that being stuffed and slightly bloated made that girl any less attractive, then you're dreaming.

  We laughed and held hands as we wondered around, trying sweets and combinations from all over the world. It was... truly wonderful, a day-long date with a girl I never thought I'd be able to look at that way again.

  It was so easy to slip back into old and comfortable ways with her, that simple back and forth that we'd had back before... well, before she'd saved my soul in the worst possible way.

  As we walked from the festival, I found that I didn't want the date to end, and it seemed that neither did she, so we went for a walk along the waterfront and ended up sitting on the sand, with a shield around us to keep us warm.

  We talked as we watched the sun set, and then we weren't talking anymore, just staring at one another. We kissed. It was sweet and wonderful, she still tasted like chocolate.

  We spent the night right there, staring up at the stars, talking, laughing and kissing until we fell asleep under my shield, cuddled up together, more peaceful than I'd been in months.

  We made our way back to the university the next day. Both of us were late for class, but neither of us cared even a little bit. We made arrangements to meet for lunch and had a lingering goodbye that left me very happy.

  But not in a good state for learning, I doubt if I remembered a quarter of what I was taught that day.

  The days that followed were... amazing.

  Mary and Jocelyn, now firm friends, spent vast amounts of time together and there was frequent giggling and the occasional squeal when I came into view, which made me blush horrifically (which was the point). Spending time with those two was always fun, even if Mary did tend to... prevent the more amorous activity Jocelyn and I would have preferred to get up to.

  I had dropped the High Magic class, as Killian had suggested. In its place, Hopkins had agreed (with what I'm fairly certain was feigned reluctance) to teach me properly. It had taken a while for her to clear her schedule, but we eventually met at Blackhold, first thing in the morning on the second Wednesday after my big date with Jocelyn.

  After saying hello, we adjourned to the garden, the quietest and most peaceful place in the house, where she sat me down under my favourite oak tree.

  "Before we start, could I have a word? I'd ask Tethys, but she'd only make a sex joke."

  "Ah... this is about a girl," Hopkins said with a smirk.

  "Jocelyn," I replied.

  She frowned, "Go on."

  I explained how we'd started to grow closer again, and then I asked the big question.

  "Can I trust her?"

  She leant back against the oak. Hopkins had been the one to arrange all that... Jocelyn-Des stuff. Something I was still a little mad at her over, by the way.

  "She's loyal to the Archons, I suppose."

  "That's not helpful."

  "No, I suppose it's not. Look, I can't really answer this question for you, Matty. You'll have to decide for yourself if you can trust her with your heart. Listen to your instincts, what are they telling you?"

  "That I suppose I can."

  "Suppose? That's not good."

  "I really like her. I loved her before, and I can see myself heading that way again, it's just..."

  "If she betrayed you once, she could betray you again."

  "She didn't betray me, though, did she?"

  "Again, that's for you to decide."

  "You're being very helpful today."

  "It's what I do," she said with a smile, "But feelings like this don't come along every day, and Archons, especially, have trouble with these things as we generally out-live everyone we love."

  I winced at that.

  "Sorry. Just keep an open mind. She's a good girl, from a good family, she could be great for you. But be careful, many Magicians would find the idea of dating an Archon... difficult."

  "How did you handle it?"

  "Oh, I made all the classic mistakes. I tried not telling them, I tried being up-front... I've done a bit of everything. In the end, you have to find what works for you."

  I sighed and she patted my arm.

  "Don't worry, push comes to shove, she'll only live three hundred years, you can get out of it then."

  "Damn it, Jen, too dark!"

  She laughed and nudged me.

  "You'll find someone. I did; I have three live-in boyfriends at my home right now, each one faithful and wonderful and a joy to me."

  "Damn, Jen, you dog!"

  "Right? And they're pretty, too."

  "I don't think I'm grown up enough for that, yet."

  She laughed, "Said no other man, ever."

  I laughed with her.

  "Thanks, Jen."

  "Any time, little brother. Now shall we get started?"

  "You said that in a manner that makes me fear for my sanity."

  "Don't be such a baby! Now get settled, this is going to take a while. Don't worry if you don't get it right away, you're not supposed to."

  Eight hours passed. I didn't think I'd made much progress, but Hopkins was pleased enough. She stayed for dinner, and hugged me before leaving. Tethys was at my side before the door was even closed properly.

  "You smell magnificent," she said, sniffing heavily at my neck, "carnal shame with just a hint of crushing guilt, I love it when you smell like that."

  I chuckled and turned to receive the hug. I felt better for it, calmer.

  "I am not feeling guilty."

  Well, maybe I was feeling a bit bad about that 'outlive her' thing Hopkins had mentioned...

  "Yes you are. And I detect the faint whiff of imminent consummation."

  "There is no way you can smell that!"

  "Come on," she said, ignoring me, "you can tell me all about it. I'm fairly certain I'm smelling more than one girl on you."

  We settled in my library, in front of the fire, her legs on my lap and her head on my shoulder. I laid out what I'd been up to for her and she trembled, rubbing gently at my belly and chest while I massaged her feet. And I hadn't told her anything spicy at all. Goodness knows what she'd have done to me if I'd had dirt to share.

  "The redhead. Of course," she said w
ith a sigh, "How is a poor raven-haired supposed to compete?"

  "You do just fine," I said, tickling her sides, making her laugh.

  "And so do you. Not quite there yet, with the redhead, but you're managing."

  "Ha, ha."

  "And that Maggie girl! She likes you?"

  "And I like her. I wish I could do more to help her into the world."

  "You are. Believe me, you're good at that," she said softly, very meaningfully.

  I hugged her a bit tighter.

  "Does Jocelyn know I sleep in your bed?"

  "It hasn't come up."

  She chuckled, "Record it when it does, I want to hear how loud she screams."

  "Not funny, Tethys."

  "Yes it is!"

  I frowned.

  "Imagine the noise she'll make when I show her the pictures," Tethys whispered.

  "What pictures?"

  "Shh, just relax..."

  I should have known better than to ask.

  "You'll be alright. And I'm sure things will go better this time. Or maybe they won't. It doesn't really matter, anyway. You're mine in the end."

  I laughed and held her close, feeling immeasurably better, and I didn't know why. Well, I did, but we're not going there.

  "I'm not kidding," she said, nuzzling my neck happily.

  "I know," I said softly, linking my fingers with hers, "and I pity any girl I bring home to meet you."

  "Yes, just imagine all the dirty things I might do to the sweet and innocent girls that are your usual choices," she purred into my ear, making me shiver.

  "You were perfectly civil to Cathy," I said.

  "Please, like I could have done anything about that. That mess had to run its own course."

  "That sounds suspiciously like you have plans to do things to my other relationships."

  "Does it?" she asked a little too innocently.

  I just smiled.