Mine Until Moonrise

by Jennifer Bernard

  Sure enough, the little otter, with its soulful eyes and curious twitching whiskers had vanished. There was no sign of a kayak either, or a little girl.

  Megan let out a hiss of disappointment. “Damn it. I was so sure she’d be here.”

  He shot her a cautious look as he throttled down to a near-idle. Was she going to have another meltdown like the one earlier?

  But one glance told him that wasn’t going to happen. Her expression was steely, her jaw set in determination. Her feet were braced apart on the rolling deck. If a pirate had boarded just then, she’d be ready. “What next?”

  “Well, we’re out on the water, might as well keep searching. Maybe she got caught in a current.” She put the binoculars back to her face. “Oh!”

  She flung her arm up to point past the green can buoy. “I see something. Go that way.”

  He translated “that way” into south-southwest about fifteen points, and aimed the bow of the Jack Hammer in that direction. As he brought the boat around the green can, he caught sight of what she was referring to. A spot of red rising and falling with the waves.

  “Kayak?” he asked her.

  “Could be. Maybe she got caught by the tide.”

  “Yup, happens all the time.” Hope flooded through him, and he realized in that moment just how worried he’d been about Ruby’s disappearance. By God—this was what being a parent must feel like—sheer terror that something might happen to your child. How did people like Megan—parents—do it?

  The closer they got, the more the dot of red resolved into a definite kayak shape. And then a head appeared. Dark hair.

  “It’s her!” Megan finally cried. “It’s Ruby. She’s waving at me. Ruby!” She jumped up and down on the deck and waved back like a maniac. Tears ran down her face. She still didn’t look his way.

  Lucas throttled down so they didn’t rock the little kayak with their wake. At a slow chug, they glided across the water toward her. The girl waved both hands at them and he realized the problem. She’d lost her paddle.

  When they got close enough, he backed the engine to bring them to a standstill.

  “Come take the helm,” he called to Megan.

  “Why?” Still, she didn’t meet his eyes.

  “I’ll get her onboard. I’ve done this many times before. Just keep us steady.”

  Reluctantly, she came toward him and took his place at the wheel. “Be careful,” she told him, as if he were a stranger. “She’s probably exhausted.”

  “Don’t you worry. I got this.”

  He lowered a ladder off the side and climbed down. Every time the boat rocked to that side, icy water lapped at his legs. One glance at Ruby’s face told him Megan was right, she was completely wiped out. Don’t let her fall into the water.

  “Okay, honey, I’m going to reach out my hand and all you have to do is grab it and hold on. Got it?”

  She nodded. Such a smart girl and yet for some reason she’d taken a kayak out alone. She ought to know better than that.

  When he had a tight grip on her wrist, he pulled the kayak right up close to the side of the Jack Hammer. Reaching down, he unfastened the spray skirt that anchored her to the kayak. When she was free from that, he put both hands under her armpits and hauled her out of the cockpit. She wrapped her arms around his neck. Her thin body was shuddering with cold.

  “That’s it. Hold on tight, we’re going up the ladder.”

  “But the kayak…”

  “I’ll get it next. You first.”

  Getting her up the ladder was a little awkward, but Megan helped from above. She gave a sob of joy when Ruby tumbled into her arms.

  “I was so worried, Rubes. Are you okay? You’re freezing.”

  Ruby nodded, teeth chattering.

  Megan lifted her off the deck, her arms wrapped tightly around her bundle of shivering child.

  “You need a blanket. Lucas, can she use your bed? Come on, sweetie, we need to get you warmed up. What were you thinking? No, don’t answer that, we’ll talk about all that later.”

  The two of them disappeared in the direction of the bunk. As he fished the kayak out of the ocean, he heard the low murmur of Megan’s voice as she tucked Ruby into his bed. So cozy together. Such a tight little family of two.

  He stowed the kayak on the deck, where it dripped onto the floorboards, and went back to the wheelhouse. His phone buzzed. Dev had texted him.

  Did you find Ruby? Megan won’t answer.

  A chill shot through him as he put it all together. Megan knew he’d called Dev. That was why she wouldn’t meet his eyes or talk to him normally.

  Maybe their other arguments and quarrels had been like foreplay. This—felt very different.

  Megan barely held it together as they cruised back to the harbor. She couldn’t bring herself to look Lucas in the face. She was too furious with him. Embarrassed, too. That was her personal business Dev had spilled. Lucas probably thought she was just as irresponsible as Dev did.

  But she didn’t want to talk about any of that in front of Ruby. All that mattered right now was getting her daughter home.

  Ruby finally told them what she’d done as Megan and Lucas carried the kayak back to its rack. “The baby otter just needed some help to get to her mother.”

  “But her mother’s probably dead,” Megan said as gently as she could. Her heart was still pounding from the adrenaline of the scare.

  “No, she isn’t. She was injured and scared of all the boats so she couldn’t come close.”

  “How do you know all this, baby?” Megan adjusted her grip on the kayak. Lucas paused to give her time. Thoughtful—but he couldn’t be trusted. Never again.

  “Because I saw her. Hunter helped me take the kayak down to the ocean. He promised not to tell anyone so don’t blame him.”

  Oh, she was definitely going to have a talk with Hunter, if his parents hadn’t already. Grace had sent her a flurry of horrified and apologetic texts once word had spread.

  “I paddled out to the baby otter. She was scared of me at first, but I just played with her until she wasn’t anymore. I brought her some mussels from the rocks and opened them up for her. Then I told her to follow me. And she did! She kind of flip-flopped over to the water and jumped in. I paddled away from all the boats because that’s what was scaring her so much. She stayed right behind me.”

  Ruby’s pride shone in her wide smile. Megan didn’t have the heart to scold her about all the things she shouldn’t have done.

  “And then another otter came swimming over. An adult otter with a scab across her face, like she’d been hurt. I know it was her mother, because right away the baby went paddling over to her. The mama sniffed at her and kind of nuzzled her face. It was so cute. And then they both swam away. They were happy to be back together.”

  They reached the top of the ramp. Megan put down her end of the kayak to take a breath. Lucas did the same and they rested for a brief moment while she tried to take in this story.

  “You broke the rules, Ruby. There are going to be consequences. You went out on the water alone.” She shuddered as she pictured what could have happened.

  “I’m sorry, Mommy. I’m sorry! I just had to help her.” When Ruby was dug in like this, it could be hard to get through to her.

  “But…where did you get the idea that she needed your help?”

  “I don’t know.”

  Megan felt her patience snap. “Ruby. Where? What made you break so many rules and put yourself in danger?”

  “I don’t know! Every time we passed that buoy I thought about her and what if her mom was hurt and couldn’t get to her and…”

  Ruby choked on a sob and every ounce of Megan’s anger vanished into the ether.

  She crouched down and wrapped her arms around her sobbing daughter. “It’s okay, sweetie. Everything’s okay. I’m here. I’m okay. Your little baby otter is okay. I love you so much, honey. I’m right here. Not going anywhere.”

  With Ruby’s trembling body press
ed against her, she dug deep for every reassuring word she could find. You’re safe. You’re loved. I’m here. I’m okay.

  But inside, a dark hole had opened up in her soul. This was her fault.

  Of course Ruby feared for her mother after the shooting. The terrible incident had shattered her sense of safety too. That was why she’d gone off to help the otter. Because from her perspective, what could be more disastrous than being ripped away from your mother?

  Worst of all—Megan herself had made it worse. She’d never talked about the shooting with Ruby, aside from the basic details that were common knowledge. Ruby hadn’t asked about it, and she hadn’t wanted to talk about it. She’d come here to Alaska to start new. To escape. To fill her life with new sights and experiences and never have to think about the shooting again.

  But some things couldn’t be escaped. She shouldn’t have tried.

  Once Ruby was settled into her car under a pile of blankets, she turned to Lucas. The evening sun turned his face a warm gold and picked out the evergreen flecks in his eyes. He’d never looked more handsome. And she knew that she did love him.

  But it was over now.

  “You’re angry that I called Dev,” he said in a low voice.

  “You were spying on me for him.”

  “No. He wanted me to, but I told him to fuck off.”

  Empty words. He’d called Dev, hadn’t he? She couldn’t fall for his excuses. “You called him.”

  “Yeah. I still had his card in my pocket and when I saw you like that—I remembered what he said about your panic attacks. I didn’t know what to do. I didn’t know how long it would last. I didn’t know anything. You’ve never told me anything.”

  She wanted to scream and cry and yell at the heavens. But she couldn’t get her jaw to unhinge.

  “You’ve never talked to me about the shooting.”

  “It’s…it’s over,” she managed.

  “I’ve rescued enough victims to know it doesn’t work like that,” he said gently. “It’s not over.”

  “Not that. This.” She waved a hand between them and choked out the words. “This is over. I can’t trust you. Dev’s going to…he thinks I’m…” The words tumbled out of her now. “You should have told me before you called him! You should have told me he wanted you to be his spy! This is…it’s over. I should never have come here. It was a big mistake.” Her voice cracked at the end, but she refused to give into any more emotion. She had to get through this, then she’d break down.

  Lucas’ face turned stony. He held her gaze for a long moment, as if measuring her sincerity. Then he gave a curt nod, turned on his heel and strode away.

  Over.

  Chapter Thirty-Three

  “Sorry, the Forget Me Not is on hiatus and no, I don’t know when it will be operating again. You can write down your name and number if you want.”

  Lucas shoved a pad of paper across the counter to the Japanese couple with field glasses dangling from their necks.

  Since when had he become Megan Miller’s receptionist? Easy question. Since she’d whisked Ruby back to San Francisco with barely a word to anyone in Lost Harbor.

  Megan hadn’t disappeared completely. Zoe was watering her plants. Ben was checking on the Forget Me Not between fishing trips. Carla was answering her calls—when she felt like it.

  Lucas? Not a word since that scene in the parking lot.

  “Are you birders?” he asked the couple, indicating their binoculars.

  They nodded eagerly. “From Japan. We always want to see puffins. We have many friends who also want to come here.”

  He suppressed a sigh. An endless flow of Japanese birders would be a godsend for Megan—if only she hadn’t skipped town. If she lost this opportunity, what did it matter to him? This was her business, not his.

  “I can take you on a fishing trip. We often see puffins.”

  “Is expensive?”

  “I’ll give you a special birder’s rate. Same as the Forget Me Not.”

  They eagerly accepted his offer and he passed them the paperwork to fill out.

  He couldn’t let Megan’s clientele slip away, could he?

  “Stealing Megan’s customers?” Ralphie lounged against the wall, nursing a soda. They’d only stopped in for a second to pick up a new shipment of life jackets that had been delivered to the office.

  Stealing her customers? Megan would probably see it that way too. Let the feuding continue. “They came to me, what am I supposed to do?”

  “When the fish are running…”

  “Exactly.” They each grabbed a box of life jackets and headed toward Ramp Two. He avoided the sight of the Forget Me Not bobbing sadly in the slip next to his. He and Megan were like…ships in the night. And the day, and that back corner of the office, and the Jack Hammer, and…

  He shook off those distracting memories as they neared the Jack Hammer. Someone was waiting there. Boris. Without his bicycle, for once. The man shrank into his hoodie when he saw the two of them.

  “Ralphie, go grab us some coffee, would you? I’ll take it from here.”

  When Ralphie was gone, Lucas stepped cautiously toward his visitor. “Hi Boris, are you looking for me?”

  “Yeah. Where’s Megan?”

  Oh. That was what he wanted. Well, Lucas could relate. “She’s taking care of some things in California. Do you miss her? I do.”

  That frank admission pulled Boris’ gaze to his face. “Yeah.”

  “She’s nice, isn’t she?”

  “Yeah.” He fiddled with the strings of his “Get Wrecked at the Olde Salt Saloon” sweatshirt.

  “Where’s Anushka? She okay?”

  Miraculously, he’d stumbled onto the right words. The fear cleared from Boris’ face. “She’s home. I came to talk to you. About Mean Jack.”

  Mean Jack…Lucas’ father. Well, he couldn’t really disagree with that nickname. “Do you mean about that night? What happened?”

  “Yeah. What I saw. It was stupid.”

  “Stupid?”

  “Ayup. Stupid. He was…” Boris walked with his hitching stride to the stern of the Jack Hammer and gestured to a spot on the gunwales. “Right there. He had a suitcase. He was laughing a lot. Like this.” He mimicked Jack Holt’s cackling laugh with eerie accuracy.

  A nearby seagull took flight, flapping across the harbor with a startled caw. Maybe the seagulls remembered Jack Holt and how he’d toss beer cans at them when he was drunk.

  “What was in the suitcase? Was he going somewhere?”

  “Nah. He wasn’t going nowhere. It was a dumb prank. It was full of lead weights, like for fishing lines. But they were painted like eyeballs.”

  “What? Jesus.” Lucas scrubbed a hand through his hair. Jack Holt had always loved a mean prank and he could absolutely imagine him in his shop with a pile of lead balls and some paint.

  “He was muttering stuff. He didn’t know I was there.”

  “Where were you?”

  “Up there.” He pointed to a bench on the boardwalk. Next to it an industrial telescope anchored to a concrete block was aimed toward the glaciers on the other side of the bay. “On the bench. But I could hear. I hear everything.”

  “What was he muttering? Can you remember?”

  “He was talking about Old Crow. How he was going to scare the smile off him. Old Crow smiles a lot. Maybe Jack didn’t like that.”

  “Jack and Old Crow had a forty-year feud, you know that.”

  “That’s what they say.” Boris jittered back and forth on his feet. This was the longest conversation they’d ever had. Megan said he could only handle short talks.

  “Thanks for telling me, Boris.”

  “Ain’t done yet.”

  Okay then. Apparently the guy had more gas in his tank. “Go on. I’m listening.”

  “He was back here at the stern pulling the dinghy around. It was tied up behind. I couldn’t see how it happened, but I think he was trying to get the suitcase into the dinghy.”

&n
bsp; “Oh god.” Lucas cringed as he imagined the scene. “Drunk, right?”

  “I think. I wasn’t so close to know for sure.”

  “Well, it’s a safe bet. So he was trying to get the suitcase loaded with lead weights into the dinghy—Lord only knows how he got it onboard in the first place.”

  “Maybe a deckhand?”

  “Yup, that’s probably it. Good thinking, Boris. For a strong young kid it wouldn’t be hard. For my dad…”

  “It was too heavy. I think his hand got stuck in the handle and it pulled him overboard.”

  “Probably hit his head on the railing. Or inhaled water because he was too drunk to think right.” Anything could have happened at that point. Once you were immersed in Alaska ocean water, the clock was ticking. Had he fought to the surface? Had a current come to save him? Or the opposite—maybe a swift current had claimed him in a final watery embrace.

  Boris twisted his hands together. “I didn’t go down because Anushka was sick—too far—so I called from the phone—”

  Lucas stopped him with a hand in the air. “Forget it.”

  Once his father had gone overboard, his chances were slim. Maybe someone close by could have saved him. But not Boris from the boardwalk.

  “My dad died the way he lived. Being an ass and pulling a stupid drunken prank on his longtime feuding buddy. You couldn’t come up with a better end for him.”

  Boris shoved his hands deep in his pockets. “You’re not mad?”

  “That’s why you never said anything, because you thought I’d be mad? No, Boris. I’m not mad. I’m—” He shook his head and rubbed the back of his neck. He wasn’t sure exactly what he was. Many emotions were coursing through him, but “mad” wasn’t one of them. “I’m glad you told me. Thank you. I owe you one.”

  “One what?”

  “It’s a figure of speech. You need anything, ever, you come to me and I’ll help you out. That’s what I mean.”

  Boris sniffed and swiped a hand across his nose. “Okay.”

  Lucas took a chance and squeezed him gently on the upper arm. He sensed the man’s fear and dropped his hand immediately. “Friends?”