Begin Again

by Nicole Pyland

  Her second problem was that she missed her big sister terribly. They’d always lived in Seattle. They’d been best friends even when they were kids, when people generally hated their siblings. When Paxton had come out as a teenager, Adler had been so supportive of her. Little did they know that Adler would later find her – not so straight, as it turned out – self, loving a woman named Morgan Burns, who lived and loved Lake Tahoe. Now that Adler was there permanently, Paxton’s life in Seattle didn’t seem all that great to her.

  Adding to all this was, of course, the fact that she was still single. Her straight older sister had managed to find and fall in love with a beautiful woman, but Paxton, who had always known she was gay, had zero luck in that department. Her third problem, though, was perhaps the one she needed to fix the most. With Adler gone now, and most of her friends married or seeing someone seriously, Paxton was kind of on her own.

  When she made her way outside the airport, Adler was standing there, waving wildly at her. Paxton rolled her eyes. They’d seen each other only a month prior. Paxton had to admit to herself, though, that she missed her sister. Did that make her co-dependent? She didn’t care if it did. She loved her sister. She missed having her stop by her apartment at night or on the weekends. She missed stopping by Adler’s very nice apartment that she’d had to sell for her when she left the city.

  “Hey, big sis.”

  “Hey, little sis. I missed you.” Adler reached for her and hugged her hard.

  “Missed you, too,” Paxton replied, hugging her back just as hard. “I can’t believe I’ve never been to Tahoe.”

  “I know. It’s crazy; right? It’s not all that far away from Seattle, and it’s beautiful here. We should have visited long before I met Morgan.” Adler smiled at the sound of herself saying Morgan’s name.

  “God, when’s the wedding?” Paxton replied sarcastically.

  “I don’t know. One day.” Adler shrugged and took Paxton’s roller bag.

  “Really?”

  “Is that surprising? I moved here to move in with her,” Adler asked as they walked. “We’ve been together for over a year now.”

  “I know. It’s just weird to think of you married.”

  “Why?” Adler laughed.

  “Because you never really seemed interested in it before,” Paxton replied as Adler placed her roller into the trunk.

  “I wasn’t until Morgan. I mean, we haven’t talked about those steps like we’re about to take them or anything, but we both want the same things whenever they happen.”

  “I think that’s great,” Paxton replied, sitting in the passenger’s seat of Adler’s car. “Are those hiking boots behind your seat?”

  “Morgan’s are behind your seat. We keep them in the car in case we get the urge to go hiking or something,” Adler said.

  Paxton shook her head and replied, “How are you even still my sister?”

  “It’s fun. I didn’t use to like it, obviously, but that’s how Morgan and I met. It’s like our thing now. It’s also easy since we work at an outdoors store. We have extra hiking boots in her car and at home, too.”

  Paxton rolled her eyes at her changed sister. Then, she watched as Adler pulled out into traffic and they began the drive back to Adler and Morgan’s house. The ride wasn’t a long one. The view was pretty standard from what she could see at first. Then, Adler pulled them onto a different road that was lined with thick, tall trees. She couldn’t see the lake from the road, but she could somehow sense that it was present.

  They pulled into the driveway. Adler turned off the car. When they got out, Adler walked to the front door, leaving Paxton to retrieve her luggage. She was a guest in their home, but she was also the little sister. Adler gave her the quick tour of the whole house she and Morgan now shared. Technically, Morgan owned the place, but it was their home. She dropped her bag in the guest room and made her way back downstairs, where Adler had opened a bottle of red and poured out two glasses.

  “Morgan just texted. She’s still at the store. I was thinking, we could do something simple tonight for dinner, since I’m too lazy to cook, Morgan will probably be too tired, and I don’t trust you with cooking,” Adler said before sipping her wine.

  “One time, I almost burned the down the kitchen,” Paxton replied with a wink.

  “What do you want? Want to order a pizza?” Adler asked.

  “From that pizza place you guys go to all the time?”

  “Donoto’s? We do usually go there instead of getting it delivered. That’s mainly because their delivery isn’t always fast. Happens in a town like this, apparently. Plus, Chris is there.”

  “Chris again?”

  “She’s a friend of Morgan’s. Everyone’s, I guess. I’ve only ever seen her at the restaurant, but she’s very nice.”

  “Does she, like, own the place or something?”

  “No, she just works there, but she’s been there forever. We’re regulars. How about that? I’m a regular somewhere now.” Adler lifted her eyebrows.

  “You really have changed, huh?” Paxton took a sip of her drink. “I think it’s good. You needed a change. You seem happier.”

  “Now, I just have to work on you,” Adler said.

  “What do you mean?”

  “Come on, Pax. I know you. Something’s up.”

  “Nothing’s up.”

  “Liar.”

  “I’m not lying, Adler.”

  “Fine. Whatever you say,” Adler replied. “But you’re lying.”

  “When is your girlfriend getting home, so I have a sane person to talk to?” Paxton fired back.

  CHAPTER 3

  Chris really only had an hour. She needed to have time to run home and change into her uniform before the start of her shift at four. She knew these people had all seen her in her uniform before. Some of them had only seen her in uniform. There was still no way she was showing up to a backyard barbeque in her black and red checked shirt, black pants, black apron, and black non-slip shoes. She was also not going to change for work at Morgan’s, and management frowned on them changing at the restaurant for some reason she’d never attempted to dive into further.

  She was planning to ring the doorbell but heard chatter out back and decided to take a chance. She headed around the side of the house, wondering just how it was people around her age were able to afford a place like this when she was barely scraping by. She wasn’t envious. She’d worked hard for what she and Wes had; in the same way that these women had worked hard for what they had. She admired Morgan and Adler for how much and how hard they worked. She just wondered how life managed to throw so many curveballs her way when everyone else seemed to get those fastballs right down the middle.

  “Chris, glad you could make it,” Morgan said the moment Chris rounded the corner into the backyard.

  “Thanks for the invite. I brought this.” She held up a six-pack of beer. It was domestic and on sale. “I didn’t know what else to bring.”

  “This is great. You didn’t have to bring anything,” Morgan replied, taking the beer, and placing it onto a folding table they’d set out back. “We’re still picking out our patio furniture. This will do for today, though.” She motioned toward the table. “You know pretty much everyone, I think. We invited a few people from work, obviously, but I think you know the rest.”

  “Right,” Chris said, feeling completely out of place among friends.

  “Addie’s over there.” Morgan pointed at her girlfriend, who was talking to Riley.

  “I’ll go say hello.”

  “Great. I’m going inside to grab the burgers. We’ll get cooking soon, but there are snacks and stuff. Make yourself at home.”

  Morgan ran off into her house. Chris looked around. She knew most of the people as Morgan had said, but she didn’t know exactly how to approach them. Everyone she knew was talking to someone else. She didn’t want to interrupt their conversations, but she also didn’t want to stand around looking like the loser kid at a high school danc
e. She’d been that kid. It wasn’t fun the first time.

  Chris checked her phone. She had exactly fifty-four minutes before she had to leave. She approached one of the tables where chips, dip, veggies, and other snacks had been laid out. She stacked a few things on a paper plate with blue and green flowers around the edges; their throwaway dishes were nicer than her real ones. She grabbed a bottle of water and sat in a folding lawn chair off to the side of the rest of the group. There were probably about twenty or so people there. She knew about half of them. She decided she’d sit and eat. If someone wanted to talk to her, they’d come over. If they didn’t, no big deal. She’d have some good food and head off to work.

  “Anyone sitting here?”

  “No,” Chris replied, looking up from her plate at a woman she hadn’t met before.

  “Cool. Thanks.”

  The woman grabbed the other folding chair, carried it across the yard, and placed it next to two other women.

  “What the fuck?” Chris muttered under her breath.

  “Hey, Chris.” Adler approached, blocking her view of the woman who’d just been completely rude to her for no reason. “How are you?”

  “I’m okay,” Chris replied. She shook her head a little, trying to get the woman’s strange move out of her mind. “Who’s that?” She nodded toward the woman.

  “Oh, that’s Pax. That’s my sister,” Adler said with a smile.

  “Pax?”

  “Paxton. Our parents picked weird names. I was named after Irene Adler, and Paxton was named after a city in Massachusetts. My parents got stuck there once during a snowstorm. Guess what they did to pass the time.” She lifted an eyebrow at Chris. “I got a little sister out of the deal. She’s in town for the week.”

  “Oh, I just didn’t recognize her. She looks like you a little, I guess, though.”

  “Same hair. Light brown runs in the family. But she has green eyes. I got the gray ones. She got the better nose, though, I think. I’m okay with it.” She turned to see Morgan coming out of the house, carrying a plate of uncooked hamburgers. “I should go help Morgan. Do you want me to introduce you around to any of the people you don’t know?”

  “No, I’m okay. You take care of your guests,” Chris said.

  “You are our guest, Chris,” Adler reminded. “Kinsley and Riley are over there. Reese and Kellan went inside for a few minutes.”

  “Okay. Thanks.”

  Adler left her in her chair off to the side of the rest of the people. She and Morgan stood at the grill, taking turns flipping the burgers and talking to their guests. Kellan and Reese made their way outside a few minutes later, came over and chatted with Chris before they moved along to talk to their friend Stacy and her husband. Riley and Kinsley stopped by, too. They pulled up chairs, talked with her for a few minutes, and then left to go inside the house. Chris stayed sitting in the chair, holding her plate of half-eaten food, and stealing glances at the rude girl she couldn’t call rude because she was the hostess’s sister. Then, she stood up, tossed out her trash, waved goodbye to a few people, and got in her car.

  The party had been a mistake. She’d spent so little time with these people outside of the restaurant. Today only proved to her that she wasn’t meant for this crowd. She was better off in her checkered uniform shirt with her nametag. She fit in at Donoto’s. She fit in with her kid brother. That was enough for her. She’d make it enough.

  ◆◆◆

  By eight, Chris was tired. It would be a long night, since it was a typical busy Saturday in the tourist-friendly and family-friendly restaurant. She’d be there until at least midnight, and she wasn’t even closing tonight. She grabbed the check off the table and saw the twenty percent tip. That was helpful. It had been a party of eight. They’d ordered two appetizer platters, four pizzas, three rounds of drinks, and four shared desserts. This was the kind of tip that helped her make rent. They’d been a fun table, too. Exhausting, but fun. Now that the party had left, she helped Max, the busboy, move the two four-top tables apart. Just as she finished putting the chairs back in place, she noticed Paxton enter the restaurant. She appeared to be alone and was giving the hostess her name or, perhaps, asking where to place a to-go order. Chris couldn’t tell due to the chattering guests and loud overhead music. She made her way to one of her other tables to refill a Diet Coke. When she returned, Paxton was sitting at one of her empty tables, with a menu in hand. This was just what Chris needed. She took a deep breath, made her way over to the table, and looked down.

  “Welcome to Donoto’s. My name is Chris. I’ll be taking care of you tonight.”

  Paxton looked up at her and replied, “I know you.” She squinted at her. “How do–”

  “I was at Adler and Morgan’s today. You borrowed a chair.”

  “Oh, right.” Paxton leaned back in the dark wood chair. “You’re Chris. Adler mentioned you worked here.”

  “I do.” She shrugged. “Are you waiting on Morgan and Adler?”

  “No, I’m here by myself,” she said.

  “Oh.” She tapped her pen to her tiny notebook. “Can I get you something to drink?”

  “Just water with lemon. Can I get it with no ice, though?”

  “No problem.” Chris walked off, grabbed the water with no ice, put the lemon wedge on the edge of the glass, headed back to the table, and placed it in front of Paxton. “Do you need a few more minutes?”

  “What’s the best pizza here? My sister and Morgan won’t stop raving about this place.”

  “Depends on what you’re into, I guess.”

  “Pizza?” Paxton shrugged, and – God help her – Chris thought it was adorable when Paxton combined it with a scrunched-up nose.

  “I meant: are you a vegetarian or anything?”

  “No, I pretty much eat anything.” Paxton’s eyes got big. “That sounded bad.”

  “Why?” Chris asked.

  “No reason.”

  “No reason?”

  “Just the lesbian in me thinking a comment about me eating anything being inappropriate for this conversation,” Paxton replied with smile. “Sorry. My jokes are so lame, I have to explain them.”

  Okay. She wasn’t all that bad then. She was kind of funny. She was definitely cute. She was also a lesbian.

  “We’re known for our deep-dish pizzas here, but we have all the other crusts, too.”

  “Can I get the special that’s on here, with the thin crust?”

  “What size?”

  “It’s just me; small will do.”

  “I’ll put the order in.” Chris turned and walked off.

  Why was this weird? She’d waited on Morgan and her friends countless times. It hadn’t ever felt this weird. Paxton was just sitting alone at the table, doing something on her phone. Chris normally walked over to the table and sat down when people she knew came in. She’d join in on the conversation if she could. Sometimes, she’d just use it as a chance to take a load off her feet for a few minutes. With this stranger, though, she couldn’t bring herself to sit down at her table.

  “Thanks,” Paxton said when Chris brought over her pizza.

  “Sure. Can I get you anything else?”

  “I’m good for now. I might need dessert later, though. I’m killing time.”

  “Killing time? Aren’t you here to visit Adler?” Chris asked.

  “I am. But Adler is currently visiting Morgan very loudly in their bedroom, which shares a wall with the room I’m staying in.”

  “Oh,” Chris replied with wide eyes.

  Paxton laughed and replied, “I know. It’s gross. It started with giggling. I thought someone must have said something funny. Then, I heard a couple of moans and got out of there. I tried hanging out in the living room, but just knowing my sister was upstairs getting laid was enough to make me leave the house. I borrowed her car and came here.”

  “That sucks.”

  “Yes, it does.” Paxton looked down at the pizza. “This looks great. Thanks.”

  “Oh, s
ure.”

  That was the end of the conversation. Paxton said her food looked good, dove into the pizza, and looked back down at her phone, which appeared to be constantly buzzing. She was done talking to Chris.

  Chris walked off to the kitchen, where she grabbed another order for a different table. The next time she looked over at the table, Paxton was gone. Did she dine and ditch? Chris hadn’t even brought her check.

  “Hey, where did table fourteen go?” she asked her manager.

  “Oh, she grabbed me and asked for her check. Said she had to go.” He passed Chris the check with some cash. “She said for you to keep the change.”

  When the guy walked back toward the kitchen, Chris looked at the check, which had come to under twenty dollars. Paxton had left a fifty. While Chris normally loved big tips, she didn’t like them coming from a woman who had few moments of polite conversation mixed with a rude and dismissive attitude.

  How was Adler Williams even related to this woman?

  CHAPTER 4

  “I cannot believe you two got it on last night. I was in the other room,” Paxton said to Adler while she poured milk into her cereal.

  “Sorry.” Adler sat down at the kitchen table. “She was – I don’t know – in the mood. And I like when she’s in the mood. I am powerless to resist her. I tried to keep it quiet.”

  “You failed.” Paxton sat down next to her sister. “I went to that pizza place just to get out of here.”

  “I know. Morgan told me before she left this morning to go hiking with Reese.”

  “She’s hiking without you? I thought that was your thing.”

  “It was, technically, their thing before it became our thing.”

  “And it doesn’t bother you that your girlfriend is out with her ex-girlfriend?”

  “Reese is married, Pax. Besides, Morgan loves me. She and Reese are friends.”

  “I know, but still. I think it would’ve bothered me a little,” Paxton said.