Begin Again

by Nicole Pyland

  Chris sighed and said, “I don’t know.”

  Cheyanne wiped a tear from her cheek with a shaky hand and said, “I thought I could leave. I thought I could come here and learn about my daughter and her family. I knew it would take time. I thought we could try, though. I thought I’d have a family again. You have pity on me now, but the moment I’m healed, I’ll never hear from you again. Wesley will go to college soon. He’ll want nothing to do with me. I can only afford this apartment for another month. I will be on the street. They will take me back to the church where I’ll have shelter and food.”

  “And indoctrination,” Chris reminded. “What they do there is illegal; you know that.”

  “It’s not to them,” Cheyenne argued.

  “Is it to you?” Chris asked with tears in her own eyes now. “Is what they did to your daughter okay, Cheyanne? Is what they would have done to me okay? Would they have allowed me to marry another woman? Would they have forced me to marry a man I could never love? Would they have forced Wes to marry multiple women and have children with them even if he didn’t want that for himself?” Chris’s tears streamed down her face. “You had a choice. You joined them. You took my mother’s choice away from her. She had to flee to survive. You show up on my doorstep one day and just expect me to have no problem with you being a part of my life? Are you kidding?! You thought it would take a couple of months, and I’d be okay with you cooking us dinner or talking about your life there? Cheyanne, I’m not even sure if that’s possible. But I know it’s not possible in the amount of time you gave me before you called them.” She pointed toward the closed door.

  “What am I supposed to do, Christina? I have nothing here.”

  “You have a choice,” Chris replied, wiping the tears away. “You have the choice that you never gave her.”

  “I have no choice. I have no money. I’ll have no home soon. I–”

  “She had no money. She had no home. She made the choice to leave because she was brave. She tried, Cheyanne. She tried until she wasn’t trying anymore. She was living the life she wanted. You could have that.”

  “How?” Cheyanne asked softly through tears.

  “I don’t know. But I think you owe it to yourself to at least try to figure it out. Hell, you owe it to Wes, who actually seems to like you,” Chris said. “He wants to get to know you, Cheyanne. If you leave, he won’t get the chance. You’ll find a job somewhere. You might not be able to live here, but you’ll find a place. You’ll do it because you have to do it. Trust me, I know all about that. It’s hard out there, but at least it’ll be your choice and your life. You won’t just be going back to a place you left because you’re scared. You said it yourself: you don’t like the direction they’ve taken the cult. It’s gotten worse since your husband died. I can’t even imagine what that means, but if that’s true, you can’t go back there.”

  “They’d leave me in peace. I’d be respected as a wife of the former prophet,” Cheyanne replied.

  “You’d still be alone.” Chris shrugged. “At least if you’re here, you’d have Wes. You’d have a chance at, maybe, having some kind of a relationship with me and those cousins you keep mentioning someday.”

  “Someday?”

  “I won’t promise you anything.” Chris gulped. “But if you, I don’t know, come by once a month for dinner or something, I’d be civil. That’s what I can offer you right now.”

  “And with Wes?”

  “I won’t stop you from being in his life. It’s his life; he can make his own choices. If you do anything to hurt him though, I–”

  “I wouldn’t.”

  “We’ll see,” Chris said. “Listen, you still need help at least for another few days. Those dressings need changing every day, and your knee isn’t 100% yet. Just come back to the house for the next few days. Wes can maybe help you with the job search. He’s not playing tennis right now.”

  “Because of me,” Cheyanne said. “I am very sorry about that.”

  “The doctor told me it was an anxiety attack,” Chris replied. “I guess I can’t exactly blame you for that now, given everything you’ve been worrying about lately.” She paused. “He’s got some time on his hands, and I know he’d like to help.”

  “I can’t ask that of you.”

  “You didn’t. I offered. I’m also offering to get rid of the two guys out there, but you have to do something for me; for her.”

  “What?”

  “What they’re doing is wrong, Cheyanne. It may have been a church to you, but it’s a cult. They brainwash people, they abuse them, they detain them, and it’s all wrong.”

  “You want me to do something about it? What could I even do?”

  “You can talk to the police. Mom never could because you were there. She loved you in spite of everything. You can tell them what happens, what you’ve seen, and who’s involved. They can decide what to do from there.”

  “That place was my home for–”

  “There are two men standing right outside this door, who are more than willing to take you back.” Chris hooked her thumb back at the door. “Like I said, you have a choice.”

  ◆◆◆

  “I am so glad you’re home,” Chris said, wrapping her arms around Paxton’s neck.

  “Me too.” Paxton kissed her the moment they pulled back enough for their lips to connect. “I thought I’d come by your place, though.”

  “Wes and Cheyanne are having a movie night tonight. I have the night off caretaker duty,” Chris explained with a wide smile.

  “Really? You have the whole night off? You can stay over?”

  “I am staying over, yes.” Chris kissed her again. “And I want to hear all about your trip and the decision about the office. I’m making you dinner, too.”

  “You are?” Paxton pulled back to give her a once-over. “What’s gotten into you? You seem different.”

  “I’m happy, Pax. You make me happy.”

  “I’m glad. You make me happy, too. But Adler and Morgan invited us over to dinner tonight. I got the text on the way here from the airport. I accepted on our behalf. Should I tell them no now, because I make you so happy, you want to cook me dinner?” Paxton teased. “And what happened with Cheyanne? Is everything okay there? You’ve hardly mentioned her the whole time I was away.”

  “It can wait,” Chris replied. “This can’t.” She leaned back into Paxton, wrapping her arms around her girlfriend’s waist. “I love you.”

  “I love you, too,” Paxton said back with a slight confusion in her tone.

  “What time do we have to be there?” Chris asked.

  “For dinner? They said drinks are at seven. It’s only five now, so I think we have some…” Paxton trailed off.

  Chris had pulled back the moment Paxton had started speaking. She’d removed her own shirt, unbuttoned and unzipped her jeans, and revealed a black lacy bra and panty set that Paxton had never seen her wear. Her nipples were visible, and they were hard. Paxton lowered her eyes to look through the see-through panties before she lifted her eyes back to meet Chris’s. She gulped audibly at the look of desire in her girlfriend’s eyes.

  “I believe I promised you I’d take care of you when you got back,” Chris said, reaching for Paxton’s button-down.

  “Well, this is a very nice homecoming,” Paxton replied as Chris unbuttoned her shirt. “I missed you. I’m so happy to be home.”

  Chris smiled. Paxton knew why. Every time Paxton used the word home, referring to South Lake Tahoe, it made Chris believe that she was staying just a little more. Chris removed Paxton’s shirt, dropping it to the floor of Paxton’s living room. Then, she kissed Paxton’s neck and shoulders, removing her girlfriend’s bra, and dropping it to the floor, too. Paxton smiled when Chris fumbled with the zipper at the back of her pencil skirt. She’d had one final meeting with her attorney before she had to catch the flight. She hadn’t bothered changing. Now, Chris was watching the skirt as it fell to the floor. Paxton was watching her. Chris mov
ed her in the direction of the bedroom. Paxton was happy then that she’d given Chris a key to the place, because Chris had dimmed the lights, lit some candles, and pulled back the comforter and sheets before Paxton had gotten home.

  “Chris, this…”

  “Just lie down, okay?” Chris asked softly.

  “I will do whatever you want me to do right now.” Paxton lied down on the bed and watched as Chris removed her own bra, leaving those sexy panties on, and climbed on top of her. “Not taking those off?”

  Chris only smirked in response as she pressed her center into Paxton, who still had her own underwear on, though a much less sexy pair. Paxton spread her legs to allow Chris to rock slowly against her. The feel of the lace against her body turned her on like crazy. Chris must have realized that. She lifted up, pulled at Paxton’s underwear, and tossed them onto the floor beside the bed. Then, she climbed back on top of her and repeated her ministrations. She rolled slowly, pressing the lace against Paxton’s center. Paxton gasped. Her breathing picked up in pace. Her hands went to Chris’s ass and cupped it. Chris reached behind her to take one of Paxton’s hands. She moved it between their legs and slid it inside her own panties. Paxton cupped her sex immediately. Chris bucked into Paxton’s center at the touch. They’d been without one another this way for too long.

  Paxton slid her fingers into Chris’s wetness, moving them slowly up and down as Chris continued to rock her hips into Paxton’s wetness. She moved her own finger just enough so that with each movement of Chris’s hips, Paxton’s finger would press down into her own clit. Paxton watched Chris’s breasts as she moved against her. She thought she’d come from the sight of them until Chris moved her hand between their legs and stroked Paxton.

  “Jesus!”

  “I missed you,” Chris whispered against Paxton’s lips before kissing her.

  Paxton felt Chris drift lower before she entered her. Paxton definitely missed Chris, too. She stroked Chris with the tips of her fingers at the same time Chris thrust slowly inside her. Paxton came when Chris’s hips started moving too erratically for her to keep stroking the spot she knew Chris liked. It didn’t seem to matter, though, because Chris came right after her.

  “That was…” Paxton couldn’t finish the sentence because Chris kissed her long and slow at the same time she pulled out of her.

  Then, Chris lowered herself and rested against Paxton’s thigh as she used fingers to spread Paxton. She moved her mouth to Paxton’s sex and sucked her girlfriend’s clit fully into her own mouth.

  “Wow. I need to go on business trips more often.”

  “Pax?” Chris stopped and looked up at her.

  “Why’d you stop?” Paxton ran her hand through Chris’s hair.

  “All your business is here,” she said. “I want you here.”

  “I am here, Chris. I was only kidding.”

  “I mean, I want you here forever.” She kissed Paxton just below her belly button, lifting herself up slightly to do so before lowering herself back down to lick Paxton from her entrance to the very tip of her clit. “I want what you want, Pax.”

  “Another orgasm?” Paxton lifted an eyebrow.

  “A lifetime together.”

  CHAPTER 32

  “You said drinks were at seven,” Paxton said to Adler a few minutes after they arrived. “We’re only five minutes late. Who starts drinks that late, anyway? I mean, it’s not like we’re all in our twenties here. I’d like to be back in my own bed with my girlfriend by nine.”

  “I’m so sorry to inconvenience you.” Adler chuckled at her sister as she pulled back from the hug they’d just shared. “And please tell me you showered after Chris gave you that hickey on your neck that your sweater doesn’t quite cover all the way up.”

  “I did, yes.” Paxton smiled at her. “Well, we did. That’s actually where she gave it to me.”

  Adler laughed and pulled on Paxton’s hand to take her into the kitchen where Morgan, Chris, Kinsley, Riley, Reese, and Kellan were all in conversation and in various stages of drink-pouring. Kinsley passed Riley a glass of red wine and then picked up her own to take a sip. Reese and Kellan were laughing with Morgan about something. Morgan had one hand on her wine glass and the other wrapped around Adler’s waist when Adler moved in next to her. When Paxton approached Chris’s side, she snaked an arm around her waist and pulled her closer. Chris passed her a glass of wine but took a sip from it herself first. Paxton smiled as she looked around the room. She had this amazing group of friends and an even more amazing girlfriend, who’d just told her she wanted to share her life with Paxton. It really couldn’t get any better than this in her mind.

  “So, Pax, how’s the business?” Kinsley asked her.

  “Not mine anymore,” Paxton replied. “It belongs to someone else now.”

  Chris kissed her cheek and whispered, “Are you okay?”

  Paxton winked at her and turned back to the others to say, “It was the right call. I can’t give it the focus it needs. The business needs someone in charge of it full-time, and my heart is here now. It’s in good hands, though, and I’m ready to focus on the hotel and living in South Lake.”

  “That’s great news, Pax.” Riley smiled at her. “Now, will one of you tell us why we had to drop everything with no notice and join you for dinner?” She glanced in Adler and Morgan’s direction.

  “Oh, no reason.” Morgan shrugged both shoulders.

  “No reason? Really?” Adler’s eyes were huge as they stared at Morgan. “We’re only getting married.”

  Morgan smiled a huge smile at Adler before both women lifted their left hands into the air to show off their shiny and new engagement rings. Paxton met Adler’s eyes and gave her the biggest smile. For so long, Adler had struggled to find the balance between work and love. She’d dated man after man; none of them were good enough for her or understood her drive. Morgan did, though. Morgan loved Adler more than anything. And Adler loved her back. Paxton moved around the kitchen island to hug her sister again. She hugged Morgan after, and welcomed her into the family. Then, she made her way back to Chris while everyone else gave the happy couple their well wishes and embraces. Paxton pulled Chris into herself and kissed her neck.

  “I love you,” she said into Chris’s ear.

  “I know you do.” Chris kissed Paxton on the lips. “Let’s celebrate with our friends now. Later, we can celebrate us, though.”

  “Us, huh?”

  “Yes, we have lots to celebrate, Champ.” Chris kissed her again.

  “We do?”

  “The love of my life is home.” Chris gave Paxton another kiss. “And she makes me so happy. She’s incredibly selfless, though, which means so many of our conversations and the things we do have been about me lately. I want to show her that, as giving as she is sometimes, it’s okay to take a little, too.” She kissed Paxton on the cheek and pulled her in for a hug.

  They all sat at the big dining room table. Adler and Morgan sat at each end and could hardly keep their eyes off of each other. It would have been something Paxton would have mocked them for before; but now, she had Christina Florence sitting next to her. Paxton had a hard time keeping her hands off the woman’s thigh, knowing that Chris had on nothing beneath those black jeans she’d donned at Paxton’s place when they’d been running late for dinner. Riley and Kinsley were happy and in love, and they would also be getting married soon. Reese and Kellan would likely bring a kid into the world in the coming months or years. Adler and Morgan would be getting married. She’d be her sister’s maid of honor. She wasn’t worried about being too much for Chris anymore. Chris wanted all the same things she did. They’d have them together.

  ◆◆◆

  “Tell me about Cheyanne. I know something had happened. Wes texted me, like, three times today alone.”

  “Pax, tonight is about you. Will you calm the hell down and just let me give you a damn back massage?” Chris chuckled from her position, straddling Paxton.

  “Is everything oka
y, though?”

  “Yes. You are a good person, and you got through to me. Cheyanne is staying with us until she’s fully healed, okay? We can talk about it this weekend if you want, while we go house-hunting. There’s this one Kinsley showed me on her phone tonight that I think we should check out. It has four bedrooms, and a basement with a fifth one in it that I think would be great for Wes. It’s on a bigger lot, too, and already has one of those swing sets on it that the owners left behind.”

  Paxton smiled from her position on her stomach as Chris ran her hands up and down her back.

  “Swing set?”

  “I’d say, we could use it one day for the kids, but you basically are a kid. My guess is you’ll take it for a spin this weekend, and then find some way to update the damn thing so that adults can use it.”

  “Adults can’t use it now?” Paxton asked through the soft laughter.

  “I knew it!”

  “Hey, can I ask you something?”

  “It better not be about my grandmother while I’m straddling you naked and applying massage oil to your skin, Pax.”

  Paxton laughed again, deciding that now wasn’t the time to bring up the fact that Chris had just called Cheyanne her grandmother.

  “My parents want to come here for Christmas this year. The hotel should be finished by then, and I’m hoping to be in a house and out of this place.”

  “What’s the question, Champ?” Chris stopped the massage.

  “Will you join us and meet my parents? Bring Wes, too. It’ll be Adler and Morgan, and the three of us.”

  “A family,” Chris said so softly, Paxton almost didn’t hear her.

  Paxton rolled over onto her back and gave Chris a moment to resettle on top of her.

  “Yes, a family. I thought it would be a nice start for all of us.” She ran her hands up and down Chris’s back.

  “What are they going to think of your less than successful, former waitress of a girlfriend?” Chris asked.

  “You always act like waiting tables is somehow beneath me; beneath all of us. It’s not, Chris. It’s a job, and it’s a damn hard one, sometimes. You put food on the table for you and your kid brother when no one else could or would. You put a roof over his head, got him a car, made sure he earned good grades and got to participate in a sport that, I know, isn’t cheap. You’ve done all that on your own, babe. So, when my parents asked about you when I saw them the other day, that’s what I told them. I told them you’re the hardest worker I know; that you inspired me to build this hotel and start a new life here, where I’m incredibly happy; that you gave me a relationship with a kick-ass kid in Wes; and that you love me, even though I stole your parking spot and ditched you that night at Donoto’s.”