Fatal Flashback

by Kellie VanHorn

  Her voice dwindled away as images flung themselves into her conscious mind. A phone call and a broken drinking glass, crystal splinters scattered across the tile of her apartment floor... Her mother clutching her father and weeping like her heart had split in two... A closed wooden casket and a church full of people dressed in black...

  She pressed her hand to her mouth, stifling the sob trying to choke her. Her throat burned, tears stinging her eyes.

  “I’m sorry.” Logan wrapped his good arm around her back, pulling her to his chest. “I’m so sorry. Those aren’t the good memories to get back.”

  “I don’t...” She swallowed but the lump wouldn’t go away. Burying her face into Logan’s shirt didn’t help. “I don’t know what happened. How could I forget?”

  He stroked her hair, his touch gentle and soothing. “It was only three months ago, Ashley. Your brain is still healing.”

  “What...what happened to him?” So hard to breathe. As if someone had dropped a heavy rock on her chest.

  “He didn’t come back from patrol. We sent out a search-and-rescue team, and...” His voice trailed away, his eyes full of raw emotion. Whatever had happened, he hadn’t recovered from it yet.

  “And?” she prompted softly.

  “We...” He swallowed. “I...found the body a half mile off the trail. He didn’t have any water with him. He’d wandered off the trail, gotten lost without proper supplies...and...we were too late.” Logan’s voice cracked.

  Ashley dug her forehead back into his shirt, shaking her head. It shouldn’t be true and yet... His words struck a chord of truth deep inside her. Hadn’t she felt sick to her stomach every time she looked at pictures of Sam?

  Latent memories of him trickled into her mind. His laughter. All the lame jokes he used to tell. His insistence on going to church every week. His love of camping and the outdoors... Suddenly she could picture him in a ranger’s uniform. Maybe he had worked here. But—

  “No,” she insisted. “That couldn’t have been Sam. It must have been someone else. He was an expert outdoorsman. He never would’ve gone out unprepared.”

  “Maybe it wasn’t your brother. I don’t know. But I do know the desert is a harsh place and even experts have underestimated it before.”

  “But wasn’t he trained? I mean, you all wouldn’t have sent him out alone if he didn’t know the trails or know how much water to carry, right?”

  Logan didn’t meet her eyes as he answered. “No, we wouldn’t have. A rookie ranger can’t go on patrol alone until their trainer verifies they’re ready.”

  “So...what, then?” Ashley asked sharply. Anger felt so much better than the misery of grief. “Someone sent him out too soon? Who trained him?”

  Logan stared straight ahead down the road, a muscle twitching in his jaw.

  After a long time he turned to her and Ashley’s breath caught at the storm of sorrow and self-reproach in his eyes.

  “I did.”

  FOURTEEN

  “Oh, Logan.” All the anger had melted out of her voice. She pulled away from his chest and laid a hand on his arm. Logan had to resist the overwhelming urge to pull away from the touch meant to comfort. He didn’t deserve comfort. “It couldn’t have been your fault. You’re excellent at what you do.”

  “Would you still say that if you knew for sure it was your brother?”

  She looked down at the dirt. “I have his picture at home, in Panther Junction. I’ll show it to you when we get back.”

  If we get back, Logan thought. Sometimes no amount of knowing about a place was enough to guarantee survival. He and Ashley might end up meeting the same fate as Sam—dehydration and heat stroke.

  He hadn’t said anything to Ashley, but he was feeling worse the longer they walked. There might come a point where he would have to send her on alone, without his help—a terrifying thought. Whether the Big Bend Sam had been her brother or not, Logan didn’t think he could take losing another ranger that way.

  And the closer the sun got to the horizon, the more their chances of spending the night out here increased.

  When he stumbled over a rock in the path, Ashley glanced up at him, a crease forming between her brows. “How much farther is it to the main road?”

  “Longer than I’d like,” he admitted. “Maybe two or three miles. But the hot spring site is closer, maybe a mile from here.”

  “Will anyone be there this time of day?”

  He sighed. “Hit or miss. It’s popular with tourists, but it’s also right on the river. We might run into the shooters.”

  “I think it’s a chance we’ll have to take.” She took his good arm in hers. “Let me help you.”

  They didn’t talk much over the next half hour. Logan concentrated on each step, one foot in front of the other, and the steady support of the woman beside him.

  The sun had become a giant orange ball dipping behind the Chisos Mountains by the time Logan caught sight of the low buildings that marked the hot spring. The natural spring of hot water, located right next to the Rio Grande, had been discovered and used by early European settlers hundreds of years ago. A small town had sprung up at one point, complete with a general store and post office. But, like most small towns in so remote an area, its lifetime had been short-lived and now only a few ramshackle, abandoned buildings remained.

  The park service had built a parking lot near the old town and a trail to the hot spring itself, a few hundred yards away near the river. It was a favorite swimming hole for park visitors, but not usually this late in the day.

  He hadn’t expected anyone to be there, but that didn’t prevent the disappointment that washed over him anyway as they walked past the hot spring and up to the trail leading to the parking lot.

  “It’ll be another two miles from here to the main road.” He struggled to keep his voice even.

  “We can do it.” Ashley smiled encouragingly, but the creases lingered between her eyes.

  They rounded the bend leading past the old post office. Suddenly slamming car doors broke the silence. Two engines started, one after the other. One of the vehicles pulled away immediately, but the other idled for one precious moment.

  Ashley’s gaze darted to his.

  Logan pulled his arm away. “Run.”

  She raced up the slope toward the paved lot, waving her arms and yelling so loudly they’d certainly be shot if their pursuers were anywhere nearby.

  But then he crested the hill behind her and saw a truck. And—oh, thank You, Lord—it was the dark green of the park service. But it was almost out of the parking lot.

  “Stop!” Ashley yelled, waving her arms and chasing it from behind.

  The truck slammed into Reverse and pulled to a stop a short distance away. The door opened.

  Ed Chambers. Logan’s legs went weak as relief flooded his insides. He sank to his knees and waited as Ashley and the chief ranger ran over to him.

  “Ed...”

  “Hey, brother.” Ed knelt. “Looks like you got yourself into a bit of a tussle. I can’t wait to hear the story.”

  Logan arched his eyebrows. “It’s pretty exciting...”

  “I’m sure it is. You can tell me about it on the way to the clinic. Ashley, help me get him to the truck.”

  Ashley slid into the center of the truck’s single bench seat and helped Logan into the passenger seat. Ed climbed in behind the wheel.

  The distance to Terlingua was excruciatingly long: an hour up past Panther Junction, plus another out to the west entrance.

  As they drew near to Panther Junction, Ed glanced at Ashley. “I imagine you’ll want to come to Terlingua, too. Otherwise, I can drop you off here.”

  Logan could swear red tinted Ashley’s cheeks. Ed did have a knack for reading the human heart.

  Graciously, Ed continued, “You might need to get looked at, too. Seems like
you’ve had quite a day out there.”

  His friend had no idea.

  * * *

  Ashley and Ed had been sitting in the waiting room at the Terlingua medical center for a good hour. A nurse had examined Ashley and, after painfully removing at least a dozen cactus spines and cleaning out several cuts, she’d offered some ibuprofen and released her. Now, as they waited for Logan, Ashley shared as many details as she could. Ed already knew she was with the FBI and searching for Jimenez, but she didn’t tell him about the map or her real motive for being undercover.

  “So, what did they want from you?” Ed scratched his forehead.

  Ashley shrugged. She hated lying to him, almost as much as she had hated lying to Logan. But she still didn’t know whom she could trust, and she certainly didn’t want to put anyone else in danger. “Somehow they knew we were with the park service. I think they wanted to find out how much we knew. If we were on to them or not.”

  Ed nodded. “This is bad news for us, for the park. If word leaks out that a cartel is operating through here, we’ll lose our tourists, even after Jimenez is long gone.”

  “We don’t have any proof yet,” Ashley cautioned. The last thing she wanted was to scare Jimenez off before she and Logan found the mine. She hoped today’s escape wouldn’t be enough to do so.

  “But you have the tips that brought you here in the first place. And your contact. Did he give you any details on where Jimenez is operating?”

  Nothing she could share. Especially before she figured out who the insider was in the park service. “Nothing we can act on quite yet. I need to discuss this with my supervisor at the Bureau before we do anything.”

  “All right,” Ed agreed. “But if we find those gunmen on this side of the Rio Grande, I’m arresting them.”

  “Fair enough.”

  “How much does Logan know about you?”

  Ashley got the feeling the question pertained as much to his friend’s well-being as it did to the safety of her mission. “Everything.” Finally, something she didn’t have to lie about. “I couldn’t keep it a secret anymore.”

  He stared at the empty plastic chairs across the room for a moment, his expression thoughtful. But then his features relaxed into a grin. “Well, you chose wisely. I’d trust that man with my life.”

  “I know.” She studied her hands. If only things could be different. If only she and Logan could have met under normal circumstances, not in this web of intrigue and danger.

  “He’s had his heart broken before.” Ed’s soft words pulled her out of her reverie. “He’s a good man, but you have to be patient with him.”

  “Why are you telling me this?” She cocked her head to the side.

  “Because I can see something’s there, between the two of you. It’s taken him a long time to get over the past.”

  “I...” She started to deny it but gave up. If it was so obvious Ed could see it, there wasn’t any point in lying to him. Or to herself, for that matter.

  Ed smiled. “He’d probably kill me if he knew I told you that.”

  “Told her what?” Logan stood at the entrance to the waiting room. His arm was bandaged and secured in a proper sling, and his face had some of its regular color back. A smile played on his lips, at odds with his narrowed eyes.

  “That you are the most stubborn, toughest ranger I’ve ever had the pleasure of working with.” Ed rose to his feet and clapped Logan on his good arm.

  “They say I’ll live. And they didn’t even have to amputate.” Logan shot them a lopsided grin. “Thanks to you two.”

  “I’m just grateful Ed was at the hot spring,” Ashley said.

  “God was very merciful to us.” Logan shook his head.

  As much as Ashley wanted to leave God out of the equation, she had to agree the timing had been downright providential. Another minute later and they would’ve missed Ed entirely.

  “What were you doing there, anyway, Ed?” Logan asked as they headed for the exit.

  He shrugged. “I had a meeting with Adam Smith to talk about opening up the old post office and general store for visitors.” Glancing at Ashley, he added, “He’s the chief of resource management.”

  Ed turned back to Logan. “I was there all afternoon. Your girl here caught me seconds before I drove off. I’m glad you weren’t any later.”

  Ashley frowned as she thought about what could have happened. Catching Ed’s reference to her, she glanced up to see Logan’s eyes go wide. For one moment she imagined what it would be like to be with someone like him—respected, loved, secure. An equal, valued partner. She’d put her career first for so long, she’d never realized what she was missing.

  Her heart hurt. Maybe someday.

  Right now, she had a case to solve.

  She cleared her throat. “It’s late. We’d better get back to headquarters.”

  The heat of the day had faded into a cool desert night by the time they arrived at Panther Junction.

  “I’ll talk to the superintendent about what happened,” Ed said. “You two get some rest. I don’t want to see either of your faces skulking around the park tomorrow, got it? Logan, you need to give that arm a chance to heal, so I want you to take off a couple of days, at least. I’m sure the superintendent will agree with me.”

  “Maybe a day or two,” Logan said begrudgingly. “But I don’t want to be left out of the loop.”

  “Don’t worry, I’ll keep you informed.” Ed waved good-night.

  “He’s right, you know.” The first stars glittered above as Ashley and Logan strolled toward his house. “You do need time to recover.” She tapped her temple. “Especially with the head injury.”

  “I can’t let you go looking for that mine alone and, if I know you, that’s exactly what you’ll do while I’m lying around on my couch resting.”

  “I guess you know me pretty well.” She grinned. “But if it makes you feel any better, I don’t know where to look yet. All I’ve got is the trail name.”

  “How about if we try to track down some pictures in the archives? I’m not so incapacitated I can’t at least do that.”

  She nodded. “All right. But sleep in tomorrow. I won’t do anything stupid.”

  “Promise?”

  “Pinky swear.”

  Logan held out his good hand and she hooked her little finger with his, sending a jolt of warmth up her arm. “I’m going to hold you to that.”

  They reached his house but Logan didn’t turn toward his door. “I’m taking you home.”

  “You don’t need to,” Ashley protested, facing him. His sandy-brown hair stuck out at odd angles after the chaos of their day, and she was filled with the sudden urge to touch it. Absolutely not.

  “I know. I want to.” His eyes were gentle. Caring. But then he stared down at the sidewalk. “And I want to see your brother’s picture.”

  Of course. Of course. She was letting her personal feelings get in the way of work again. Logan wanted to help her catch Jimenez and get her memories back. He had never communicated an interest in anything more—not with words, anyway—and even if he did... She wasn’t interested. She couldn’t be interested. The job came first.

  Her front door was still locked. She exhaled slowly as she dug her key out of her pocket. Apparently whoever had tried to break in the first time hadn’t gained the courage to try again. Either that or they were extremely good at replacing everything the way she had left it.

  “Where is the map, anyway?” Logan sat on her sofa.

  “I’ve been carrying it with me.” She glanced down at her waist.

  “I’m glad they didn’t search you.”

  “Me, too.” She stepped inside her bedroom, pulling the cloth pouch out of the place where it had rubbed against her skin all day, and brought the map and the picture of Sam back to the living room. “At least I put it in a plastic bag
, so it wouldn’t get wet. Learned my lesson after the Jeep incident.”

  She handed the picture to Logan. “I found it in my wallet. It took me too long to remember who he was.”

  “It’s not because you didn’t love him,” he said softly, taking the picture from her. She could scarcely breathe as she waited for him to say something.

  He stared at the snapshot for a long moment before looking up, his eyes glistening in the lamplight. “I’m so, so sorry, Ashley.” His voice broke. “Sam told me he had a sister who lived in DC, but I never made the connection until I heard your real last name. He never gave us any details about you.”

  She bit her lip, letting out a painful laugh. “He knew better than to divulge any of my secrets.” Probably the only reason she managed to convince Morton to let her come here undercover. Nobody knew they were related.

  “We had a memorial service here, so none of us traveled to the funeral.”

  Her eyes burned, and Ashley impatiently wiped the tears away as she took the picture back. “He wasn’t very old, was he? Younger than me.”

  “Twenty-three.” Logan pressed his lips together.

  “Just out of college, then.” She tried to keep the bitterness out of her voice, but there was so much of it filling her heart. It wasn’t fair.

  “It should never have happened.” He dragged his hand over his face, through his hair. “I never should have sent him out there alone.”

  She dropped onto the cushion beside him. “It wasn’t your fault. I know you well enough to know you wouldn’t have let Sam go unless you thought he was ready. And, like I said, Sam knew his way around the outdoors.” She wiped again at her cheeks. “Whatever happened wasn’t your fault.”

  “Thank you for saying that. I still feel like I failed him. Like I should have gotten there or found him sooner. There must’ve been something I could’ve done differently.”

  “You’re not all-powerful, Logan. You can’t hold yourself to that standard.” She looked down at her lap. “But Someone else is and He could have saved my brother. He just...didn’t care.” She pursed her lips, clenching her teeth before any more of the ugliness inside spilled out. Logan didn’t deserve it.