Home to Me

by Bybee, Catherine

“I’ll tell the others you’re tired.” He headed for the door. “Unless you’re up to—”

  “I’d appreciate that,” she interrupted him.

  He opened the door to leave.

  “Thank you,” she said before he could walk away.

  “Anytime.”

  CHAPTER SIX

  The memory of Erin’s face draining of color, her blue eyes losing focus, and the rise and fall of her chest as she gasped for air kept reoccurring in Matt’s head like a boomerang photo placed on social media to capture your attention. He replayed the entire time he was alone with her to figure out what had happened to bring on her reaction. It was the second time he’d seen her completely tune out. The first had been months before, when he’d raised his arm suddenly and she’d pulled back like a hand-shy dog waiting for a blow from its owner. Parker had been there and blamed Erin’s reaction on low blood sugar . . . but Matt wasn’t fooled. It didn’t take a rocket scientist to realize that Erin had some serious baggage from her past. A past she wasn’t open about.

  At first he thought she was just shy, an introvert that would just as soon be alone than with others. Only she wasn’t at a loss for words in a group of people. She joined the conversation, asked questions. And if he thought long and hard about it, she was great at skirting any personal questions and changing the subject. Since most of the times he was around her, Parker was there as well . . . and women stuck together. Parker did her fair share of steering the conversation away from Erin’s history.

  Someone had hurt her. And since she didn’t talk about a family, Matt wasn’t sure if it was a parent, relative, or past boyfriend. Hand shy was hand shy, and one didn’t get that way without repeated hits. Hits one couldn’t avoid or escape from easily.

  It pissed him off.

  Matt had seen his share of the seedy side of humanity as a firefighter. The number of medical calls he assisted on over the years and the homes and other people’s lives he’d walked into woke him up early to the fact that some people sucked. They abused children, women, and the elderly. And abuse came in many forms, from the physical to neglect. It gutted him to see a hurt child, and to know it was done intentionally spiked a “get even” bone he had to work hard to push down.

  He was a protector. Had been since he was ten.

  Matt wanted nothing more than to protect Erin. Although he felt like her immediate danger was only in her head, he still had the desire to fight her demons.

  He ran the paces on his home treadmill until he racked up five miles. Then he jumped off and laid waste to the punching bag hanging from his ceiling.

  The desire to push his body to the limit, and erase the image of Erin damn near doing a face-plant, fueled him.

  With his workout and shower behind him, he headed into his garage and turned on his sound system. Before long, he was elbow deep in repairing the engine on his dad’s lawn mower that he’d promised to get to. He’d put it off for a couple of days, but was going into a busy workweek that wouldn’t give him any downtime at home. So with a country station playing some of his favorite tracks in the space, Matt enjoyed the occasional breeze that drifted in from the open garage door. Neighbors would drive by, a few would yell out his name and wave, and some of the kids would ride their bikes up and down the street. He liked his neighborhood and his single-story home. It was only him, and since his brother’s place was bigger, family dinners that weren’t at his parents’ home were always at Colin’s. Only now Matt was pretty sure that would be moved over to Parker’s. It was hard to compete with all that property, complete with a pool and a yard you could host your own Woodstock in.

  He was singing the lyrics to a man getting drunk on a plane after being jilted on his wedding day when he heard his name being called.

  He looked up to a completely unexpected visitor. “Erin?”

  “Hi.” She wore capri pants and a short-sleeved shirt that danced as the wind blew against it. Her hair was pulled back at the nape of her neck, and the large-rimmed sunglasses she often wore hid her eyes. “I hope you don’t mind me stopping by.”

  Mind? Hell no. “Of course not. Anytime.” He picked up a shop towel and wiped the grease and oil from his hands. “Come in.”

  She stepped out of the glaring sun in his driveway and into the shade of the garage. It was then he noticed the dish in her hands. She held it with one hand and removed her sunglasses with the other. “Parker told me where you lived. I wanted to bring these by.”

  Matt tossed the towel to the side and reached for her offering.

  “My way of saying thank you for all your help yesterday.”

  He looked down. “Brownies?”

  “Hard to go wrong with chocolate.”

  “My favorite.”

  She smiled. “I like to bake, even in the heat.”

  He set the dish aside and turned down the volume on the speaker. “You didn’t have to.”

  “I know. I wanted to.” Her eyes drifted around his garage and landed on a calendar above his workbench. A swimsuit edition kind that defined his man space. He suddenly felt odd for having half-naked women wearing tiny straps of material that passed as swimwear displayed on his wall.

  “Come inside. Milk will go perfect with these.”

  “No, that’s okay—”

  “I insist.” Now that he had her in his space, he wanted to keep her there. And not in the garage where she stuck out like a fish on shore.

  “Only for a minute. I don’t want to interrupt.”

  He ignored her words and led her inside. Years of working in the fire department equated to him always keeping his space tidy. Leaving a mess for anyone at the station wasn’t tolerated. There were times they would be called out and leave on the fly, but once they were back, picking up the place was top priority. Only in the thick of a fire were messes left. He was thankful for his clean habits now when he was showing a woman he wanted to impress his home.

  His kitchen was small, but more than enough space for him. Matt pulled out a chair at the dinette set for four and offered Erin a seat. “Milk? Or I can make some coffee.”

  “Milk would be fine.”

  Matt washed his hands in the sink before pulling down two glasses and small plates for their brownies.

  “Have you lived here long?” Erin asked.

  “About five years. I wanted a place that had enough room for RV parking. Do you camp?”

  She shook her head. “I’m fond of running water.”

  He brought the milk to the table where she sat with her hands in her lap. He caught her scanning the room with a slight smile on her lips.

  “My RV has a fifty-gallon tank. There’s always running water.”

  She removed the plastic wrap from the brownies that had already been cut up and placed one on each plate.

  “I didn’t camp as a kid and can’t say I’ve had much of an opportunity as an adult.”

  Matt took the seat opposite her, remembered napkins, and jumped up to retrieve them. “Then it isn’t so much you don’t camp, it’s that you haven’t tried.”

  She laughed. “I guess you could say that.”

  “You should try it sometime. I drag Colin out as often as he gives me a chance. We drive to Rincon a couple times a summer.”

  “What’s Rincon?”

  “It’s a stretch of beach where you can park an RV and enjoy the ocean for a couple of days.” He picked up the brownie and brought it to his mouth. “Mmmm, still warm.” She watched as he bit in.

  He would have told her it was the best thing in the world even if it sucked, but he had a hard time not moaning once his taste buds caught up with his mouth. Decadent, mouth-watering chocolate on his tongue the consistency of melted butter. “Oh my God.”

  He opened his eyes to find her smiling.

  “You like it?” she asked.

  He took his time chewing, savoring every bit before letting it slip down his throat. “Wow. That did not come out of a box.”

  She offered a quick shake of the head. “No.
If you’re going to take the time to bake, do it properly.”

  The next bite hovered over his lips. “You bake properly and I’ll eat properly. I’m glad you brought these here and not the station. I do not want to share.”

  She took a small bite of her portion and smiled. “Not bad.”

  They took the next bite in silence, and he washed the last of it down before reaching for another one.

  “I need to make sure the first one wasn’t a fluke.” The second brownie met the first in the bottom of his stomach. “Nope. Just as good as the first.”

  Hers sat unfinished. “I’m glad you enjoy them. I really appreciate your help yesterday.”

  “If this is my reward for helping, let me know when you need your trash taken out, or your car fixed . . . or whatever.”

  She pushed her chair back. “I don’t want to keep you.”

  “You haven’t finished your brownie.”

  “I might have eaten one while I was cutting them up.”

  He struggled to find a reason to keep her there. Anything to spend more time with her. Especially while she smiled at him the way she was now. “I have to work the next couple days but I’m free on Thursday. Any chance I can convince you to join me for dinner?”

  And her smile was gone. “Matt . . .”

  “We don’t have to call it a date. Just dinner. Or maybe lunch . . . coffee?” Anything.

  “I don’t . . . I’m not really in the right place right now.”

  He knew her rejection was an automatic response. And in reality it wasn’t a rejection directed at him. Not an I’m not interested in you. More of an I’m not ready myself. Which was the only refusal he could actually work with.

  “Another time, then?”

  “Matt . . .”

  He waved her off. “Don’t answer now. If you get hungry and don’t know where to go, I’ll help you out. Consider me your 911 for emergency meals.”

  Now she was grinning. “Emergency meals?”

  “I’m good at spider removal, too.”

  “That comes in handy.” She stood.

  He directed her through his living room and out the front door.

  “This doesn’t look like a bachelor pad,” she said, looking around the room. “Did an old girlfriend help you decorate?”

  He placed a hand on his chest and winced. “I did this myself.” With help from his sister, but he wasn’t going to admit that freely. “Do you want to see the rest of the place?”

  “No. I need to get home. I have some work to do.”

  He didn’t push. Instead he walked her out the door and down his driveway. She unlocked her door with a remote key and he opened it for her. “Thanks for the brownies.”

  “Thanks for yesterday.”

  She slid behind the wheel, started the car, and rolled her window down.

  He leaned a hand on the hood of her car. “Remember, 911 food emergencies . . . I’m your man.”

  She was smiling and not saying no. “Bye, Matt.”

  He stood tall and stepped away as she drove off.

  Back in his kitchen he realized she’d left her sunglasses behind. Which guaranteed he’d see her again soon. And the dish the brownies were delivered in. He’d milk that for two visits.

  With a plan in place, he popped the remainder of her brownie between his lips and headed back to his garage.

  Life was good.

  “I can’t believe I’m leaving in the morning.” It was Wednesday and Parker stood over an open suitcase with a dozen outfits tossed around it. Scout placed his head in his paws at the foot of the bed as if bored with the whole process.

  Erin brought a sundress out from inside the massive walk-in closet and held it up. “What about this one?”

  Parker’s eyes lit up as she reached for the white cotton backless sundress. “I forgot I had that.” She held it up to her body and looked in the full-length mirror. “I bought it when I lived in San Diego at this cute little shop in Point Loma.” She sighed as if stuck in a thought.

  “You went to college there, right?”

  Parker snapped out of her frozen gaze and took the dress to her suitcase. “Yes. And if I’d had my act together, I would have graduated in the time I was there. Unfortunately, I was busy buying sundresses and finding a reason to wear them.”

  Erin knew that Parker hadn’t gotten her degree and was considering going back to college to finish now that her younger brother was graduating from high school. “Regret is a wasted emotion.”

  Erin’s comment brought Parker’s head up and eyes in direct line with hers. “You don’t regret your ex?”

  Just the mention of his existence made her heart rate jump. “Touché.”

  Parker turned back around and started rolling up the outfits she’d picked out to wear. “Since we’re on the subject, do you mind telling me about this ex being a one-time husband? Or are we going to forever ignore the fact that I stumbled upon that information?”

  The desire to change the subject with a distraction pulled Erin’s gaze in the opposite direction. “Do you have shoes to go with that dress?”

  Parker stopped packing, dipped her chin, and looked at her from across the room. “I don’t know why it’s a big secret. Lots of people get married too young. It’s obvious you had a reason to leave the jerk, so you can’t blame yourself for that.”

  Rooted in place, Erin stared forward and remembered the words the counselor had told her before she left everything to start a new life in California. “It’s a lot harder to be a person who doesn’t have a past than one who does. When people get too close to the truth, it’s almost impossible to keep it to yourself. Every person you confide in makes it easier for him to find you.”

  “I can see by your face you want to talk about shoes instead,” Parker said.

  “Yes, please.” She hated the desperation in her voice.

  Parker sat on the edge of the bed and lowered her voice. “How about this. I’ll tell you what I think I know, and you can confirm or deny if I’m off.”

  She offered a noncommittal shrug.

  “You married the wrong guy, who beat you up.”

  Erin blinked several times but said nothing.

  “He did it more than once. In fact, I’m guessing it happened a lot.”

  More blinking.

  “I’ll bet this trip to Cabo that you’re scared to death he will come after you here. Which explains the security system and the double-checking the locks on the doors. And the lack of friends you have around or even a regular job that makes you leave the house every day.”

  Erin started rolling her index finger on the pad of her thumb and kept her lips shut.

  “Anything I’m leaving out?”

  She heard the screech of tires and the feel of glass against her face. “Nope. That about covers it.”

  Parker offered a half-baked smile. “That was a little too quick, Erin.”

  Instead of a lie, she told her the truth. “He’s a dangerous man. If he finds me, he will kill me.”

  The smile on her friend’s face fell. “The more people you have around you, who love you, the easier it is to protect you.”

  “You of all people know you can’t always count on that,” Erin told her. “I’m learning to protect myself.”

  They were both quiet for several seconds.

  “I’m really sorry you live with that fear,” Parker told her.

  She sighed, and forced her hands to relax. “Me too. But at least it’s not a daily reality any longer.”

  “How long were you married?” she asked.

  Nope . . . not going there. “Let’s play another game, okay? Truth or Dare is getting old.”

  Parker jumped up and nodded. “Got it. Sorry. I don’t want to pry.”

  “You’re curious. I get it. I would be, too.”

  She tucked the cotton dress in her suitcase. “I have a pair of brown sandals that will work with almost everything.”

  Shoes were a much safer subject.

  Erin
watched Parker walk into the closet and return with the sandals.

  “Please keep this between us,” she told her.

  Parker stopped packing and looked her dead in the eye. “I told you I won’t say anything, and I haven’t. Colin flat-out asked me once what your story was, and I told him that secrets are sacred.”

  That was a relief. “Thank you.”

  Another shirt went into the suitcase. “But if I figured it out, it probably isn’t going to be long before others do, too. Although I didn’t see the ex-husband thing coming.”

  “No one else will either.” At least she hoped. Erin scanned the clothes on the bed and started to count. “I thought you said this was a five-day trip. Six if you count your travel day.”

  “It is.”

  She started to count. “So you’re going to change clothes three times a day?”

  Undaunted, Parker rolled up another outfit. “I haven’t taken a break in three years. I want choices.”

  “I bet you wear three outfits and one sundress. The rest of the time you’ll be in a bathing suit or naked in bed.”

  Parker smiled. “Options!”

  CHAPTER SEVEN

  Erin stood in the driveway alongside Matt, who had been roped into driving Colin and Parker to LAX for their noon flight.

  While Colin put their bags into the back of Matt’s truck, Parker ran through a list of things that needed to happen, or not happen, while she was away.

  “I already told Austin no parties.”

  “I was there. I know.”

  “And since you’re staying in the guest room, make sure Scout goes out before you go to bed. Otherwise he’s up the second the sun comes out and whines to be let outside to pee.”

  “Got it.”

  “And Mallory said she was coming over on Saturday with Jase to use the pool. They’ll probably stay the night.”

  Yeah, Erin had already been told that, too.

  “Oh, and I told Austin that if he’s going to stay with friends at all while I’m away, to let you know. And if he’s late coming home, to let you know . . . so you won’t be startled by the gate opening and closing at all hours.” That was helpful. The house alarm system told everyone inside every time the gate opened and closed. A necessary evil when the gate was five acres away from the front door.