Running Scared

by Leslie McGill

  They arrived at Cap Central, and Durand held the door open for her. “You want to grab some breakfast?” he asked, turning toward the cafeteria. A large crowd of kids was lining up to select their food.

  “Nah, I’m good,” Rainie said. “See you in math.”

  The smell of breakfast coming out of the cafeteria made her mouth water. She had to get away before she’d be tempted to eat anything. She started toward the stairs.

  “Hey, Rainie!”

  Rainie turned around and waited for Eva and Joss to catch up.

  “What’s up?” she asked.

  “You want to get some breakfast?” Joss asked.

  “Nah, I ate before I left,” Rainie lied again.

  “That what you were so mad about?” Joss said with a laugh. “Someone drink all the orange juice?”

  “Something like that,” Rainie said. “Thanks, though. That’s the second invitation to breakfast I’ve gotten today.”

  “I think we can guess who the first one was from,” Eva said, grinning. “But actually, I wanted to ask you guys something. Did you hear that Cap Central’s going to have a poms team?”

  “Poms? What are poms?” Rainie asked.

  “They’re like a dance team but with pom-poms. They perform at games, pep rallies, all sorts of events. Cardozo High School has a poms team. I saw them when we played them last year. It looks like lots of fun.”

  “I’d like that more than cheering,” Joss said. “I can’t do those flips or splits that the cheerleaders do. But shake pom-poms? I could do that!”

  “You’d have to shake more than your pom-poms, girl,” Eva said. “There’s some dancing too, so you can guess what you’d be shaking. Mrs. McArdle is the advisor. She wants to meet at lunch today with anyone who’s interested.”

  “Oh, she’s nice,” Joss said. “I had her for sophomore English.”

  “I actually have her this year,” Rainie said. “She’s teaching one junior English class.”

  “I heard she’s tough,” Eva said. “She never cuts anyone a break on grades, even if it means they get suspended from their team. You heard what she did to Marcus DiMonte, right? Kept him from playing basketball until he got his grades up. So how about you, Rainie?” Eva asked. “You in?”

  It did sound like fun. “Sure. When and where?” she asked.

  “At lunch in Mrs. McArdle’s classroom,” Eva said. “Let’s meet in the cafeteria and bring our lunches upstairs.”

  “Sounds good,” Rainie said. She knew she wouldn’t show up in the cafeteria. She’d go straight to Mrs. McArdle’s class and pretend she had misunderstood.

  The said their good-byes. Then the girls all went in opposite directions.

  At the top of the stairs, she ran into Mrs. McArdle.

  “How you coming with that Shakespeare project, Rainie?” she asked.

  “I’m working on it,” Rainie lied. She hadn’t started the project, which was worth twenty-five percent of her grade.

  “Well, don’t put it off,” Mrs. McArdle said, walking down the hall to her classroom. “You know it’s due next week. No exceptions.”

  “Right,” Rainie said, walking toward her first class. Just then her cell phone buzzed with a text message. It was from Angie Stewart, manager at FreeZees.

  “Corie needs wkend off. Can u work 2-nite, Fri, Sat, and Sun—pls?”

  Sure, she thought, why not? Anything to keep me out of the house.

  Rainie’s empty stomach tightened with tension. Her fear about Daymon was constantly on her mind. It was there when she was supposed to be studying. It was there when she was in her house. It was what made her hit the streets, running her heart out. Her grades were slipping, she was starting to look really rough, and she barely had enough energy to climb the stairs at school. But she didn’t have any other choice. There was no way out.

  CHAPTER 4

  Joss

  Joss and Eva went to the cafeteria as soon as the lunch bell rang. They got their trays and looked around for Rainie.

  “I don’t think she’s coming,” Joss said. “We’d better go or we’ll be late.”

  “Maybe she misunderstood us,” Eva said. “I’ll bet she’s already in Mrs. McArdle’s room.”

  “She may be up there, but not because she misunderstood,” Joss said. “She’s really acting odd. You know she lied to me this morning.”

  “About what?” Eva said.

  “About something stupid. She absolutely told me she had been working last night. She said that’s why she looked so rough this morning. Then when she started talking to Durand, she said she was out running late last night. I heard her tell him she runs five miles a night. You can’t do that and work each night at the yogurt shop. So she’s lying about something—either running or working.”

  “That doesn’t make any sense,” Eva said. “Why would she lie? Do you think she was trying to impress him?”

  “No, just the opposite,” Joss said. They started for the stairs. “I think she was telling him the truth. I think she lied to me about working. But I can’t figure out why.”

  “I wonder what happened to her,” Eva said. “She looked good this summer. But she looks awful now. Like she’s homeless or something. Do you think it’s because the family is broke since her dad bailed on them?”

  “It’s possible,” Joss said. “That row house they live in looks like it should be condemned. But I feel like there’s more going on. Something serious. And I’m going to figure out what it is.”

  They walked into Mrs. McArdle’s room. Rainie was sitting in the front row.

  “Hey, where were you?” Eva said. “We waited for you in the cafeteria.”

  “Oh, sorry!” Rainie said. “Is that where we were supposed to meet? I thought we were meeting up here.”

  “Really?” Joss said. Her tone made it clear that she didn’t believe her.

  Fortunately, right then Mrs. McArdle told everyone to take their seats. Besides Joss and Eva, there were eight other girls.

  “All right, let’s get started,” Mrs. McArdle said. “For some time now, I’ve been thinking that this school needs to have a poms team. Poms are just like drill teams or dance teams but they use pom-poms.”

  “So when would we perform?” Joss asked. “Like at sporting events?”

  “Right. Football games, basketball games, pep rallies. And depending on how you all feel about it, you could even compete. Competitive dance is getting to be really big, and we don’t have a dance team.”

  “What would we wear?” Eva asked, looking worried. “I just can’t see myself in a skanky little two-piece!”

  “That would be up to you,” Mrs. McArdle said. “But even if the uniform is two pieces, it doesn’t have to be skanky. Some teams wear tank tops and shorts, others wear little skirts. You’ll have to raise money for uniforms, so it might be a year or two before you have official-looking outfits. Until that time, you could just choose matching shorts and T-shirts.”

  “Will we have to try out?” asked Keisha Jackson, the student government association president.

  “I don’t see why,” Mrs. McArdle said. “There aren’t that many of you, so there’s no competition for slots—yet. In a year or two, we may have to hold tryouts. But let’s just assume you’re all in. How’s that?”

  Her announcement was met with a buzz of excitement.

  “Girls, girls! We don’t have much time,” Mrs. McArdle said, holding her hand up for silence. “I’ve made a list of things to think about before our next meeting.” She passed out photocopied lists. “Let’s get together in the small gym next Monday after school. Wear shorts and a T-shirt. Be prepared for a workout.”

  The other girls gathered up their lunch trash and threw it out on the way out of the classroom.

  Rainie continued to sit at the desk.

  “You coming?” Eva asked.

  “Actually, I have Mrs. McArdle next period, so I’m just gonna stay,” Rainie said.

  “You didn’t eat anything. You want my ch
ips?” Joss asked.

  “No, I’m good,” Rainie answered. “I ate on the way up here.”

  A suspicious look crossed Joss’s face. “Really?” she asked.

  “Yes, Joss, really,” Rainie repeated. “Something wrong?”

  “I don’t know. Running five miles a night, no breakfast, not meeting us at lunch, no chips—you training for something?” Joss asked.

  “Did eat breakfast, did eat lunch, just didn’t want the chips,” Rainie mimicked. “Not training for anything. Just keepin’ in shape.”

  Joss thought Rainie sounded more confident than she looked. She had found a small hole in her sweatpants and was poking a finger in and out of it in a nervous manner.

  “I could not go through the day without eating,” Eva confessed. She seemed oblivious to the tension between Joss and Rainie. “It is truly the highlight of my day. No wonder you’re so skinny.”

  “But I’m not!” Rainie said forcefully. “I mean, I’m still really fat.”

  Joss couldn’t believe what she was hearing. For a moment, she couldn’t even speak.

  “Where?” she finally asked incredulously.

  “You’d be surprised,” Rainie said.

  “I’ll take those chips if no one else wants them,” Eva said.

  Joss rolled her eyes and even Rainie laughed.

  “Although I shouldn’t,” Eva said. “My butt is ready to get its own zip code!”

  The bell rang, and Joss and Eva left.

  CHAPTER 5

  Rainie

  Rainie, I need you to stay after class for a few minutes so I can talk to you,” Mrs. McArdle said.

  “Sure,” Rainie answered. She was a little worried. Teachers usually didn’t ask her to stay after class.

  The door opened and the other students streamed in. Almost immediately, there was a loud crash. A desk toppled over sideways. Mrs. McArdle whirled around to see what had happened.

  Luther Ransome and Chance Ruffin were giving each other high-fives while JaQuel Rivas picked up the desk. Rainie knew that either Luther or Chance had knocked it over. They were both athletes, and other students treated them like gods. JaQuel wouldn’t tell on them, even if it meant he took the blame.

  “Who knocked over that desk? Chance? Luther?” Mrs. McArdle asked.

  “Um, sorry, Mrs. McArdle. I tripped. I’m a little clumsy,” JaQuel mumbled.

  “Okay, settle down. Take your seats please,” Mrs. McArdle said. “First of all, there are a couple of students I need to talk to after class is over. Rainie Burkette, Thomas Porter, Luther Ransome, and Chance Ruffin, please stay after class. Now, let’s get back to reading Shakespeare’s Richard III. Who wants to read the part of Richard?”

  When she heard the other students Mrs. McArdle needed to talk to, Rainie knew it wouldn’t be good news. It was a new experience to be grouped with people like them. Thomas Porter was a thug who had just transferred to Cap Central after being expelled from a neighboring school. Luther Ransome and Chance Ruffin barely kept their athletic eligibility each year.

  When class was over, the other students headed for the door. As they passed by Mrs. McArdle, she handed them their graded tests.

  “Okay, I wanted to talk to the four of you because you all seem to be struggling in this class,” Mrs. McArdle said when the rest of the students had left. She handed each of them their test. Rainie was stunned. At the top was a big red F.

  “I need to know if you don’t understand the material. Or are you just not doing the work?” Mrs. McArdle said.

  “Thomas? Let’s start with you.”

  “This sucks. I’m outta here,” Thomas said, heading for the door.

  “Thomas. You’re going to fail English if you don’t—” Mrs. McArdle stopped talking when the door slammed with a bang.

  “Luther? Chance? Anything to say?”

  Luther Ransome and Chance Ruffin were both smirking as they looked at the Fs on their tests. Neither seemed worried.

  “I know you both play sports for Cap Central. You do know that if you fail this class, you’ll lose your eligibility and not be able to play, don’t you?”

  “Yeah, well, we ain’t worried,” Luther said.

  “No? And why is that?” Mrs. McArdle asked.

  “ ’Cause it’s all good,” he said. “We got it covered.”

  Beside him, Chance laughed hard. Rainie couldn’t believe they would joke about a failing grade. Her stomach felt like it was tied in a knot. The F at the top of her paper stood out like a neon light. She was humiliated.

  “Well, I hope your plan includes doing well on the Shakespeare assignment due next week. Because I am warning you, I will not cut you a break on your grade. If you fail, you fail—and remember that you cannot graduate from high school if you don’t pass English.”

  Both boys continued to smirk. Luther got up, and Chance got to his feet as well. “It’ll be fine, Mrs. McArdle,” Luther said. “Just chill.”

  The two walked out of the room, and the door clicked behind them.

  “So that leaves you, Rainie,” Mrs. McArdle said. “I was shocked when I graded your test. So I checked out your grades in other classes. You’re barely passing. And before this year, I don’t think you’d ever seen a grade lower than a B, had you?”

  Rainie shook her head in discouragement.

  “Tell me what’s going on with you,” Mrs. McArdle asked kindly. “This isn’t like you. I don’t have a class this period. I can write you a pass to excuse you being late to your next class. Talk to me.”

  For a moment, Rainie thought about telling Mrs. McArdle about Daymon. But she knew she couldn’t. Last year, a Cap Central girl had told a school counselor that her mother’s boyfriend had touched her inappropriately. The girl was put in foster care. Rainie couldn’t risk being separated from Jesika. She shook her head slowly.

  “Okay, I understand you might not want to talk about it. But I’m wondering if you’re doing too much these days. You don’t look very healthy. Do you have a job? Sports? What’s taking up your time since I don’t think much of it is being spent studying?”

  Rainie told her about FreeZees and running, but she knew they sounded like lame excuses. Almost without being able to help herself, Rainie said, “Am I going to be able to join poms?”

  “I’d love to have you on the team. In fact, I’d hoped you would be one of the leaders,” Mrs. McArdle said. “But you need to do your part. You have to have a C-average to be eligible. When I checked your grades, they were below that. Midterm grades won’t be posted until next week. Is there anything you can do to get your grades up by then?”

  “I can try,” Rainie said. She didn’t know how. She just felt like giving up.

  “Look, Rainie, I’m not stupid,” Mrs. McArdle said. “I know there’s something you’re not telling me. You’re a different girl than you were even a couple of months ago. I really, really wish you’d trust me enough to let me try to help. You seem like a person who needs someone to talk to.”

  Rainie started gathering her books. “No, I’m fine,” she lied. “I’m just tired, that’s all.”

  Mrs. McArdle looked disappointed for a minute, but then she went back to looking all business-like. “Well, I hope you’ve got time for poms. It’s a big commitment.”

  “I can do it,” Rainie said. “And I’m sorry about the test. I’ll try to do better.”

  “I know you will,” Mrs. McArdle said as she filled out Rainie’s late pass. “Rainie, sometimes when things aren’t going well in your life, you need to take action to make them better. It’s hard to know what to do when you’re feeling scared or confused. That’s when talking to someone else can help. Remember what I said. I’m here if you need me.”

  Rainie felt tears spring to her eyes. She looked away so Mrs. McArdle couldn’t see them. “Okay,” she mumbled as she grabbed her pass and walked out of the room. “Thanks.”

  CHAPTER 6

  Joss

  When Joss got to science class, she looked around. Rainie
’s seat was empty. She wondered where she was.

  Mrs. Reed told the class to meet with their science fair partners. Joss and Eva took their usual seats at the lab table closest to the door.

  “Where do you think Rainie is?” Eva asked.

  “No clue,” Joss answered. “I wonder if she went home sick.”

  “She looked okay at the poms meeting,” Eva answered.

  Right then the door opened and Rainie walked in. She handed Mrs. Reed a pass and joined Joss and Eva at the lab table.

  “Where were you?” Joss asked.

  “I had to go over some stuff with Mrs. McArdle,” Rainie answered.

  “School stuff?” Joss pushed.

  “Of course,” Rainie said. She looked away as she said it. As if she was lying. “Anyway, you want to talk about our project?”

  The three girls were working together on a science fair project, testing whether antibacterial soap really prevented bacteria from growing.

  “Okay, here’s the progress report,” Eva said. “Really, truly disgusting scum is growing on some of our bowls of chicken soup. My mother is getting tired of having to move them out of the way in order to do the laundry. So we’d better finish this up pretty soon, or I’m afraid she’s going to dump them down the drain.”

  “Okay, end of progress report,” Joss said. “Now let’s talk about poms!”

  “I thought it sounded like fun,” Rainie said. “And I like the other girls who showed up.”

  “I thought the same thing,” Joss agreed. “I think it will be great.”

  “Hey, you guys want to sleep over on Saturday?” Eva asked. “We can work on science for a while and maybe talk about poms. But mostly we can just hang.”

  “Sounds good,” Joss answered.

  “Can’t,” Rainie said. “I have to work.”

  “Tell Angie you have to get your schoolwork done,” Joss urged her. “She’s okay about stuff like that.”