If You Kiss Me Like That

by Harper Bliss

  She had been worried when it had taken Gloria almost twelve hours to respond to her text. When her name had finally appeared on her phone screen, Ash had been utterly terrified that Gloria’s reply would be a resounding no. That she would end it there and then, hence the long radio silence beforehand. But Gloria had said yes.

  And now, here she was on her way and she came bearing gifts. She wasn’t sure yet if Gloria would like this particular gift, but she would soon find out.

  Ash turned up the collar of her coat when she walked from the station to Gloria’s house, as if it could magically hide her from view. It was a touch exciting to sneak around Murraywood like this. She mainly looked out for Adrian or Lizzie’s cars. And her parents, who could be on their way home from a visit to her brother. Gloria’s house might be conveniently located near the station, but it was dangerously close to her brother’s. What would Ash even say if Adrian drove past her now? Surprise, bro? Maybe she should have worn a hat. But her family would recognise her anywhere, as she would them.

  Murraywood was quiet at this time of the evening. The days were getting longer, but darkness had started to fall before Ash had got on the train. Ash spotted Gloria’s car in the driveway. She was home already. Waiting for Ash.

  Ash allowed herself a brief moment to imagine coming home from work, commuting to Murraywood, every evening—to Gloria, waiting for her like tonight. She shook off the thought as soon as she’d allowed it to enter her mind. One day at a time. That was her new mantra. They might not have tomorrow, but they had today.

  Her heart racing like mad from the mere prospect of seeing Gloria again, Ash knocked on the back door. It swung open immediately. Gloria must have seen her walk up to her house. She was still wearing her nurse’s uniform.

  Gloria pulled her inside. “Did anyone see you?” she asked, before taking Ash into a tight hug.

  “Not that I know of.” It was the truth, but it didn’t mean Ash hadn’t been spotted without noticing.

  Gloria nuzzled her neck, the tip of her nose moving against Ash’s skin as she shook her head. “Christ, Ash.”

  Ash didn’t know if she was sighing because she was relieved to see her or because Ash had managed to arrive at her house unseen. Maybe it was a bit of both. She threw her arms around Gloria and held her tight.

  “I just got here. I should have picked you up at the station.” Gloria’s body remained rigid in Ash’s embrace.

  Ash put some distance between them, just so she could see Gloria’s face. “Are you all right?”

  Gloria heaved a sigh. “This was a million times easier in London.”

  “Yeah.” Ash had never in her life visited Murraywood without seeing at least one member of her family. It was strange to be here for an entirely different reason. “But, look, I’m inside your house now. It’ll be just fine.”

  “I’m going to take a shower.” Gloria wriggled herself out of what was left of Ash’s embrace. “Have you eaten?”

  “You don’t always have to ask me that, you know.” She reached for Gloria’s hand. “And I quite like the look of you in that uniform.”

  This, finally, brought a smile to Gloria’s face. “Do you now?” She cocked her head. “I’m still going to shower and change.” She just stood there. Was that an invitation?

  “Do you want me to join you?”

  “Oh,” Gloria said, as though that had been the furthest thought from her mind. “Um, if you want to, but…”

  “Hey.” Ash pulled her close again. “It’s going to be okay.” It was funny that she had to be the one saying that tonight. Maybe they would have to take turns reassuring each other. “Go take your shower. Relax. Can I get you anything while you do? Do anything to make your life a little easier?”

  Gloria chuckled. “I’m not used to so much attention.”

  Ash shrugged. She wanted to say something along the lines of ‘best get used to it’, but as much as she wanted to mean it, she couldn’t. So she didn’t say anything. She had an inkling of what she would do while Gloria was in the shower, however.

  “I brought you something,” she said. “You’ll see what when you get out of the shower.”

  Gloria’s eyes lit up. “A present?”

  “Something like that.”

  “Will it help me relax?” She pushed herself further into Ash’s embrace. “I know I’m a bit on edge. It’s been a day and, well, you know…”

  “I promise it will help you relax.” Ash found Gloria’s ear and sunk her teeth into her lobe for a split second. “You have my word.”

  “I want to open it now,” Gloria said on a sigh.

  Ash shook her head. “No.” She released Gloria from her arms. “Go on.” She gave a quick tap on her behind.

  Gloria brought her hands to her side. “I’m so curious. Why are you torturing me like this?”

  “Come on, show me the way. I’m going with you,” Ash said, because this was the kind of present best opened in the bedroom.

  Chapter Thirty-Two

  Even though Gloria knew she needed to relax, she’d never taken as quick a shower in her life. She had no idea what Ash’s present was, but she had the distinct impression it was something that would satisfy her immensely. That was what the expression on Ash’s face had conveyed, anyway. Gloria enjoyed the sensation of the hot water on her tense shoulders a few seconds longer, until she couldn’t take it anymore.

  As she towelled off, she had to hand it to Ash that bringing her a surprise was an excellent way of taking Gloria’s mind off what was, basically, hiding Ash in her house. She remembered how she’d hidden from Mary the day before. How she’d flirted with the speed limit on her way home earlier so that Ash wouldn’t have to wait outside her house and risk being spotted. Seeing Ash on the sly was thrilling but also exhausting. Gloria was ready for a few thrills because the secrecy of it all was starting to get to her.

  Gloria wrapped the towel around her body and went into the bedroom. Ash was already under the covers; the lights were dimmed. There was no sign of any gift.

  “You’re not wasting any time.” Gloria walked to the bed. “Are you that tired?”

  “Come here.” Ash threw back Gloria’s side of the duvet. Her voice was different. Her glance was more solemn as well. Gloria didn’t really know what was going on. She dropped the towel and hopped into bed with Ash.

  “I was promised a present.” Gloria made her voice sound extra petulant, but she didn’t really succeed. To have Ash waiting for her like that when she got out of the shower after a long shift was a magnificent gift in its own right. Gloria didn’t need anything else.

  “Give me your hand.” Ash held out her hand. Gloria took it. Ash slid both their hands under the covers. She put the flat of Gloria’s hand on her belly, which was enough to jolt the fatigue from Gloria’s muscles. Then she gently guided it down—Ash was feeling very forward tonight. Not that Gloria would make any pretence about the real reason Ash had come to Murraywood to see her tonight. She figured they were both very much agreed on that. But they’d barely kissed and already Ash was pushing Gloria’s hand between her legs.

  Oh.

  For a brief instant, Gloria had trouble processing what she was feeling. It was too incongruous with what she was seeing—Ash’s seductive grin, her chest now uncovered.

  Gloria wrapped her hand around the contraption Ash was wearing. It felt smooth and soft. She had to see. With her other hand, she lifted the duvet. Holy hell. The dildo Ash had strapped on to her hips was soft pink and rather large.

  She glanced back at Ash, who didn’t say anything. Gloria didn’t know what to say either. This was all so new to her. New, but terribly exciting.

  “Surprise,” Ash whispered. She put her hand on Gloria’s back.

  “It is a surprise,” Gloria admitted. She still had her hand wrapped around it. Now that the first shock had subsided, heat started spreading underneath her skin.

  “Take all the time you need to get used to it.” Ash drew circles on Gloria’s ba
ck. “I can also take it off and put it back on whenever you want.”

  Gloria looked back at Ash. “Keep it on,” she said.

  Ash nodded and flicked the tip of her tongue over her lips. “Does that mean you like your present?”

  “I think so.” Gloria bent towards Ash. “We’ll know for sure in a while.” Gloria gazed deep into Ash’s eyes before kissing her. At every turn, being with Ash surprised her, made her feel more alive than the day before. She let go of the dildo—for now—and curved her arm around Ash’s back so she could pull her near. The dildo prodded against her thigh as she did, and it only spurred on the heat beneath her skin. Being with Ash was worth taking a few risks for. As she pressed herself closer to Ash, the strap-on very present between them, she easily forgot about all the reasons why they shouldn’t be doing this. They were replaced by all the reasons that they should. The main one being that Gloria—very simply—really wanted to.

  “Do you want me to fuck you?” Ash whispered in Gloria’s ear. She’d manoeuvred herself on top of Gloria. While they’d kissed and caressed each other, Gloria’s hand had steered clear of the toy, as though she wanted to save that sensation for later, but it was always there, like a constant reminder of what would inevitably happen.

  Gloria had never in her life been spoken to like that. If she had, she couldn’t remember. It was the last thing she expected Ash to say to her. Maybe that was why it was so deadly arousing when she did.

  Ash looked down at her. The lust blazing in her eyes was different from what Gloria had seen in them over the weekend. Ash was in her element, that much was clear. What she’d just asked wasn’t as much a question as it was a statement she wanted Gloria to confirm. Not that there was any chance she’d say no. Ash’s confidence, and the insistence that came with it, was another new thrill she was discovering.

  Gloria nodded and just the simple action of moving her head up and down, of acquiescing to Ash in that way, of giving her another small piece of herself, unleashed another round of flames to lick along her skin.

  Ash smiled so warmly at her, as though Gloria had just given her an unexpected present.

  “Just a second.” She rolled off Gloria and rummaged in her bag that stood next to the bed. She re-emerged with the bottle of lube she had used on Gloria over the weekend.

  “Let me.” Gloria sat up. Ash gave her the bottle. Gloria squirted a dollop into her palm and rubbed her hands together. Then, she allowed herself a long, luxurious look at the strap-on she’d felt bulge against her body as she and Ash had kissed and rolled all over each other.

  She reached for it and the softness of it against her hands surprised her again. She rubbed the lube all over it, getting well acquainted with its shape in the process. Gloria had a lot of questions about this, but they would have to wait until later—until after Ash had fucked her.

  Then, there was only the sound of the sheets rustling as Gloria lay back. As she spread her legs. As Ash found her place between them. She’d spread her legs for Ash before—so many times in the space of one weekend, Gloria could barely believe it when she thought about it—but this was different. Not only in the level of arousal it stirred in her, but in the measure of surrender Gloria so easily engaged in when it came to Ash. This woman she’d known vaguely for a long time and who had burst onto the scene of her life and had painted it, so suddenly, in such splendid colour.

  Ash’s finger brushed against Gloria’s pulsing clit as she applied more lube between her legs, and Gloria nearly burst out of her skin with want. It was the desire, the red-hot lust she had for Ash, that made her feel most alive of all. That stirring deep inside her that could so easily, like something set on fire, spread to every cell in her body. Gloria wanted Ash with everything she had, with everything she was, and right now, it was much more exciting than it was disconcerting. Because it was disconcerting. It was incongruous with whom Gloria had believed herself to be for most of her life. It didn’t fit into the path her existence had taken.

  But it was there. Pulsing hotly between her legs, where Gloria could feel the lube dripping along her inner thigh, a sensation so unexpected but, once again, so utterly beguiling, that Gloria grew even closer to Ash. Because she might be in bed with another woman, but, somehow, she knew that that woman could only ever have been Ash. She couldn’t picture any other person ever making her feel like this. She’d tried, but she’d never come close to anything like this. Her lust was completely wrapped up in her feelings for Ash and Gloria knew this wasn’t just some tryst to make menopause more bearable. She didn’t know what it was to Ash, that was impossible, and it was too hard a conversation to have for now, but to her, right now, it was everything.

  Ash’s fingers skated along her entrance, flicked along her clit again. Gloria glanced down at the glistening toy protruding from Ash’s hips.

  “Please,” she begged, because she couldn’t wait one second longer.

  Ash shuffled closer. Gloria tried to watch, but most of what was happening was hidden from her view. Ash’s fingers were replaced by the tip of the dildo. She let it skate along Gloria’s wet folds, let it slide along her clit the way her fingers had done earlier. Gloria could see Ash’s face, though. She looked so focused, so intent on only one thing: Gloria’s pleasure.

  The toy stilled against Gloria. Ash looked up, her eyes hooded and intense. She locked her gaze on Gloria as she very gently slid the tip inside.

  Gloria swallowed the emotion out of her throat. She braced herself for what was coming. The toy was warm and wet as it slipped further into her, as it brought Ash closer to her. Gloria spread her legs further. Ash’s eyes narrowed as she pushed in further and further, filling Gloria in a way she hadn’t been in years.

  Ash leaned over Gloria, their gazes still firmly locked. And yes, the sensation of the strap-on moving inside of her was utterly divine—so divine it elicited a strange noise from the back of her throat—but it was the way Ash looked at her that made her swoon the most. It was a look that said that Ash wouldn’t be walking away from this any time soon. Gloria looked back at her as best she could, between her eyes falling shut because there was too much pleasure to process, too much joy for her body to absorb. But she knew she didn’t want Ash to go anywhere. They’d find a way to see each other, to make it work, because this was too good to not pursue.

  Ash upped the ante. Her strokes went from long and slow to faster-paced and more frantic, but only for a few minutes, after which she slowed again.

  Gloria had cried in this bedroom. At times, she’d thought she might very well die in it, that was how little strength she’d had to get up in the morning, to face another day of being a young widow. The bed had been replaced years ago, but the memories of this room would always remain, the good and the bad ones. By no means could what she and Ash were doing erase any of them; they could only add to them. What a welcome addition they were. For years now, Gloria had only ever been on her own in this room. What once was their room had become her room, and her room alone. Until now. Because after tonight, after this, a piece of Ash would always linger here.

  Ash brought her lips to Gloria’s ear, and whispered, “Sit on top of me.”

  Gloria’s eyes went wide. What? She didn’t want to stop now. She knew it was unlikely she would reach orgasm in this position, but it didn’t matter one bit. Just the sensation of what Ash was doing, of what they were doing together, was more than enough for now.

  “Come on.” Ash was insistent—a quality Gloria liked about her. If it hadn’t been for Ash’s insistence, this wouldn’t be happening at all. Ash had asked her to dance. Ash had invited Gloria to dinner. Ash had invited herself into Gloria’s house. Ash had kissed her first, although Gloria had wanted to kiss her just as much at the time. Ash didn’t wait for Gloria’s reply. She softly retreated, leaving what felt like a vast empty space inside Gloria for an instant.

  Ash lay on her back and Gloria, who only wanted that void inside her filled again as quickly as possible, followed Ash’s inst
ruction. In the end, Ash was the woman with the most experience when it came to any of this. And it was an area in which Gloria gladly relinquished control.

  She sunk her teeth into her bottom lip as she positioned herself on top of Ash. It was easy to slide herself down, the strap-on filling her so deliciously now.

  “I want you to come,” Ash said.

  Who was Gloria to argue with that? She shifted backwards slightly. Ash slid her hands up Gloria’s thighs, until her thumb came to rest near Gloria’s clit. She positioned it so that every time Gloria slid back and forth on the toy, it brushed against her there, and flared up the heat that was now building inside her at a ferocious pace.

  Gloria looked down at Ash. What was she feeling now? Her lips were slightly parted. Tiny pearls of sweat beaded between her eyebrows. She was grinding along with Gloria. They hooked onto a rhythm. Gloria couldn’t feel it, but she could guess that every time she rocked forwards, it must cause some friction around Ash’s clit. She glanced down to see what Ash’s other hand was doing, but she couldn’t see. What she could see was the look an Ash’s face. The contorted expression. The narrowing of the eyes. Her breath that became more ragged.

  Ash hadn’t only wanted to make Gloria come.

  “Oh, fuck.” The thought of Ash coming like this spurred on the rolling wave of heat inside Gloria. To be able to look into Ash’s eyes at a moment like this. To see her in this uncontrolled state of utter bliss.

  The heat inside her got the better of her and with a sequence of loud screams, Gloria came.

  Underneath her, Ash screamed and came with her.

  Chapter Thirty-Three

  “What ever shall I bring you next time?” Ash asked. “I feel like I’ve played my biggest trump card already.” She looked at Gloria over the rim of a steaming mug of coffee.

  Gloria was only wearing a robe, which she hadn’t bothered to close properly. She leaned against the kitchen counter and fixed her gaze right back on Ash. “You strike me as very resourceful. I’m sure you’ll figure something out.” She grinned and Ash could tell it was one of those involuntary grins that were impossible to hold back, no matter how hard you tried. Ash had been suffering from the same affliction since she’d arrived last night—apart from the times Gloria had made her come. A slice of bread popped out of the toaster. “Are you sure you don’t want breakfast?”