by Harper Bliss
Gloria’s hand rested on the waist of Ash’s jeans. “Can I?”
Ash wasn’t sure she’d be able to articulate anything else, so she just nodded eagerly.
Gloria flicked open the button and pushed Ash’s jeans down. Ash tried to heel off her shoes without falling over, but she had the fridge against her back for support, and Gloria in front of her. Now that her trousers had come off, the thumping between her legs was quickly transforming into the familiar liquid heat, a want that originated deep inside of her.
Gloria kissed her again. The back of Ash’s head was pushed against the fridge, such was the force of Gloria’s kiss—of her need for Ash. All Ash could do in response was claw at Gloria’s hair. Tug her as close to herself as she could get. Maybe this would be the very last time they did this. Even though Ash didn’t want to believe that, it was always a possibility. But the Gloria whose hands and body and skin were all over her right now didn’t strike her as a woman who would come to her senses any time soon—quite the opposite.
Gloria’s fingers slipped inside Ash’s underwear—exactly where Ash wanted them. She was throbbing for Gloria, reaching towards her touch.
Gloria pulled away from their kiss just as her fingertip reached Ash’s clit.
Ash gasped. Gloria gazed at her with even more intensity than before. Ash expected Gloria to push her fingers deep inside her wetness next. She’d anticipated the move already. She was more than ready for it.
Instead, Gloria’s face disappeared from her view. When Ash looked down, she saw only the dark exuberance of Gloria’s hair. On her way down, Gloria had taken Ash’s knickers with her. They rested at her ankles and Ash quickly stepped out of them.
The next, sublime sensation was the hot sweep of Gloria’s tongue against her clit. Ash’s knees buckled a fraction. She held onto Gloria’s shoulders for support—she needed it. All the desire Ash had shoved aside the past two weeks now came unleashed—unbuckled, like her knees. It ravaged her from the inside and pooled between her legs, where it met the generous strokes of Gloria’s tongue. There was no stopping this, just like there was no stopping how Ash felt about Gloria. How, at the pub, there was no stopping Ash from going after her when she saw Gloria go to the bathroom. So, of course, Ash came mere minutes later, uttering Gloria’s name with the breath she could manage, digging her fingertips deep into her flesh.
“Oh, fuck.” Ash sank to her knees and joined Gloria on the floor. “Jesus, Gloria.” She cleared her throat because her voice sounded croaky.
“I know.” Gloria dragged the back of her hand across her mouth. “It’s utter madness with you. Like I’m someone else.”
“A big old lesbian,” Ash joked, even though she wasn’t sure the current moment could sustain it. But Gloria smiled at her.
Then, they were both startled by an insistent knock on the back door—the one Gloria had forcefully closed only a very short while ago.
“Gloria.” A woman’s voice came from behind the door.
“Oh, God. It’s Sindhu,” Gloria pushed herself up. She looked around wild-eyed.
Ash scrambled to her feet and grabbed her jeans and underwear off the floor.
Gloria gazed at the unlocked the door. “I’ll try to get rid of her,” she whispered. “You can get dressed in the downstairs bathroom.”
Ash tiptoed out of the room, not knowing if she was allowed to come back in once she’d got dressed.
Chapter Thirty-Eight
Gloria opened the door and, in the short moment she was obscured from Sindhu’s view, tried to make herself look presentable.
“Where is she?” Sindhu said. “Where’s my favourite goddaughter?”
“They’re both out. Some big party at Craig’s, apparently.” Gloria stepped into view. She didn’t have a mirror. She already didn’t feel like herself, not after what had just happened with Ash, so she knew there was a good chance she didn’t look the way her friend was used to seeing her either. She tried to remember if Sindhu had told her she would stop by. She could have forgotten because after seeing Ash at the pub, Gloria had only been able to think of one thing.
“Are you all right?” Sindhu took a step towards her. “You look feverish. Your cheeks are all red.” She shook her head. “You never blush, Gloria.”
A bang came from the direction of the bathroom, loud enough to make them both look up.
“Is someone here? You just said the girls are out. If Janey were here, surely she wouldn’t hide from her godmother?” Sindhu’s eyes widened. “Wait.” She clasped a hand to her mouth. “Did I interrupt something?” Her dark gaze on Gloria was relentless. “Is it… Ash?”
“She’s just, um, in the bathroom.” Gloria tried to take a deep breath. This was Sindhu. It wasn’t one of her children who had come home early, nor was it someone who didn’t know anything about what had happened between her and Ash.
“Are you going to introduce me?” Sindhu was smiling now. Maybe, to her, this was funny. Gloria was mortified. Thank goodness she’d at least had the wherewithal to close the back door.
Gloria put both her hands on the kitchen table and took a deep breath. “Just a second.”
“Did I catch you in flagrante?” This idea seemed to amuse Sindhu greatly. “Maybe I should go.”
Gloria wasn’t going to admit that to her friend. It was bad enough that she’d asked Ash to hide in the bathroom. “Stay. Sit. I’ll put the kettle on.” Gloria walked to the hallway door and called for Ash.
She filled the kettle and tried to steady her nerves while she waited for Ash to appear. If this was what they would both end up wanting in the end, to be together out in the open, it was a good test for Ash to meet Sindhu.
“Hi.” Ash walked into the kitchen all smiles. She dragged a hand through her un-styled hair. She looked a million times better than she had at the pub earlier today. As if the orgasm Gloria had just given her had also returned her vitality. Even the circles under her eyes seemed to have shrunk.
“Ash, this is Sindhu,” Gloria said. Was that a hint of pride in her voice?
Hand outstretched, smile and gait confident, Ash headed towards Sindhu. It was an entirely new sensation for Gloria to introduce Ash to Sindhu. In the past, she had brought men to meet her friends, but it hadn’t felt like this. And not only because it was much more conventional for her friends to meet the new man in Gloria’s life. She knew that for a fact. Although she couldn’t just dismiss the thrill of having her female lover stand in front of her best friend. This new sensation, however, which Gloria identified as a blend of pride and relief and, yes, something akin to love, was entirely due to Ash being Ash.
Ashley Cooper was not the kind of person you hid away in your bathroom when your friend stopped by for an unexpected visit.
“Lovely to meet you.” Sindhu rose and Ash gave her two friendly pecks on the cheeks. To Gloria’s surprise, there was nothing awkward about the exchange.
The water boiled and Ash said she’d take care of it, leaving Gloria to sit with Sindhu, who shot her a look Gloria wanted to read as ‘Wow, girlfriend’ but of course she couldn’t be sure of what Sindhu was trying to convey.
Ash poured tea and mugs were distributed. As though she’d lived at Gloria’s for weeks, she took the biscuit tin from the cupboard and arranged shortbread on a plate. Maybe Ash was occupying herself so she could compose herself.
“So,” Sindhu said. “Is this back on, then?”
Gloria chuckled nervously. Sindhu never was one to beat around the bush.
“I think it’s fair to say that we don’t know yet.” Gloria looked at Ash for confirmation. “I ran into Ash earlier in the pub and…”
Sindhu nodded as though she knew exactly what Gloria meant by not finishing her sentence.
“For the record.” Sindhu looked squarely at Ash now. “I’m all for this. You have my unconditional support.”
Gloria felt an altogether different warmth surge in her chest. Sindhu had always boldly claimed she would have Gloria’s back, but t
o see her sit here with Ash and be so frank about it made it much more real for Gloria.
“Thank you,” Gloria said. “For now, though, the best way you can help us is by not telling anyone Ash was here.”
“Of course I’m not going to tell anyone.” Sindhu all but rolled her eyes. “I just… want to encourage you. Weren’t you on a break?”
Gloria sneaked a quick glance at Ash again. It was weird to have this conversation with her friend while Ash was sitting next to them. She felt double the pressure to say the right thing.
“We were,” Ash said. “But, um, well… I’m not sure the break is working for us very well.” She grinned at Gloria.
“Honestly,” Sindhu said, “Gloria, if you could see yourself through my eyes now, you’d know how crazy it was to fight this. You look so… utterly content, albeit a touch nervous, perhaps.” She sipped from her tea and took a biscuit.
“That may well be,” Gloria said, “but in a few hours, Sally and Janey will walk through that door, and that changes everything. Again.”
“They’re at university,” Sindhu said. “I’m not saying they don’t care, because I’m pretty sure they want nothing more than for their mother to be happy, Gloria. But they’re discovering this whole new world. Sally’s graduating in a few months.”
“Which may very well mean she’ll move back home for a while, until she finds her feet.” Sally had been very vague about her future plans. Either she had them and didn’t want to share them with her mother yet; or she simply had no clue what to do with her life after obtaining her degree. Both were a strong possibility with Gloria’s eldest daughter. She made a mental note to talk to her about this as soon as possible.
“How about I take Janey out this week for some goddaughter/godmother bonding and I put out some feelers?” Sindhu looked at Gloria expectantly. “Don’t worry, I won’t give anything away.”
“That would be great. She’s looking forward to seeing you.”
From the corner of her eye, Gloria spotted Ash checking her watch.
“I have to go soon,” Ash said.
“Oh, gosh,” Sindhu pushed her chair back. “I’m impeding on your time together. I’m really sorry. I’ll leave you to it.”
Ash was the first to get up. “It’s fine. I can’t stay. I was only meant to be here for five minutes.” Ash shot Gloria a quick wink.
Gloria stood as well. The heat that wink had produced beneath her skin was already making way for the sense of impending doom that Ash’s departure created in her. She had no idea when she would see her again.
“I’ll call you,” Ash said.
“I’ll, um, just go wash my hands.” Sindhu excused herself.
As soon as she was out of the room, Ash’s face broke into a huge grin. “I like her.”
Gloria expelled a loud sigh. “I think she likes you too.” She pulled Ash close. “Not as much as I like you, though.” She kissed Ash on the lips.
“We should talk,” Ash whispered, her words hot clouds against the skin of Gloria’s neck. “Any time this week that you can talk to me on the phone, text me and I’ll call you back as soon as I can.”
“God, I wish you didn’t have to go.” Gloria wanted to stay in Ash’s embrace for hours instead of the few minutes they were afforded.
“We’re on a break. Remember?” Ash followed up with a small chuckle.
“Sod that.” Gloria nipped at Ash’s earlobe.
“Thanks for the you-know-what, by the way. I owe you.” Ash hugged her more tightly.
“You don’t owe me anything, Ash.” Gloria inhaled deeply so she could commit Ash’s scent to memory again.
“I really should go now.” Ash freed herself from Gloria’s embrace.
Gloria watched her collect her bike and round the corner of the house. This time, their goodbye wasn’t nearly as fraught as the last time. Sindhu’s sudden arrival, which was by no means ordinary, but still had a reassuring normality about it, had made sure of that.
“Is she off?” Sindhu returned.
Gloria nodded.
Sindhu walked over to Gloria and put a hand on her shoulder. “It’s going to be all right, you know,” she said. “I can just tell by looking at the two of you together. There’s so much there, Gloria.”
“I hope you’re right.”
“What happened today?” Sindhu sat back down.
Gloria poured them more tea and told Sindhu all about running into Ash and what had happened after, leaving out the more intimate details—those memories she would savour in private.
Chapter Thirty-Nine
Ash parked her mother’s bike in the shed and took a deep breath. It was one thing to be rudely interrupted by Gloria’s friend—if she’d knocked on that door a few minutes earlier, Ash would have been in the very midst of coming—but now she had to spend time with her parents while keeping a straight face. She’d had no idea Gloria was going to react the way she did. She’d expected them to talk—another one of those difficult conversations with no easy conclusion. She hadn’t expected Gloria to come for her like that, to be all over her, to show her emotions so nakedly to Ash.
Ash tried hard to suppress a very persistent smile as she entered the living room.
“Must have been quite the bike ride, sweetheart,” her mum said, barely looking up from the magazine she was reading.
“Hm.” Ash thought it better not to say much at all. She hated lying, especially to her parents. She made for the stairs. “I’m going to get my stuff together.” She checked the time. “Can you or Dad give me a ride to the station in an hour?”
“Your dad still isn’t back from the pub.” Ash’s mum gave her a look. “He’ll be in no fit state to drive you. I’ll take you, darling.”
“Thanks, Mum.” Ash headed up the stairs.
“Ashley.”
The tone of her mother’s voice made Ash stop in her tracks. She hung her head over the railing. “Yes?”
“Can I ask you something?”
“Sure.” Instantly, all sorts of thoughts spiralled in Ash’s head. Had her mum heard something? Or worse, seen something? Did mothers really have such a strong intuition when it came to their children?
Ash’s mum put down that week’s issue of The Economist. Even before she had retired, she had always taken the time, every single week, to read it cover to cover. “I’ve been thinking about what you asked me last weekend when I was in London.”
Ash was starting to feel awkward with her body half-bent over the railing like that. She went downstairs again and sat on the ottoman near her mum’s favourite armchair.
“What’s that?” Ash had said many things to her mum that weekend.
“That very theoretical hypothesis you put to me about you—hypothetically, of course—getting involved with someone like Joanne or Sandra.” She cocked her head. “I hadn’t given it any more thought. We’d both had a fair amount to drink by then. But I had Sandra on the phone the other day and that made the thought pop right back into my head. It made me wonder… Or no, I’m putting it wrongly. It made me realise that when you asked me, I was too tipsy to inquire about it further, while perhaps I should have.”
Oh, shit.
“Were you trying to tell me something at the time?” Ash knew very well her mother wasn’t born yesterday. She also knew that she wouldn’t be questioning Ash if she didn’t have strong suspicions about Ash seeing someone. But she had no idea how she could know about her and Gloria. She probably didn’t. “Because, for the life of me, I haven’t been able to figure out why you would ask me such a thing.”
“I was just… fishing,” Ash said. Like you are doing now.
“Fishing for what? I’m your mother. I know you’ve gone through hell and back with the divorce. I’m here for you, no matter what. I really need you to know that.”
“I do know, Mum. You and Dad have been so supportive, even though I know it was hard for you as well.”
“The hardest thing was seeing you like that. So defeated and hurt.
” She put her hand on her chest. “Honestly, Ash, we just want you to be happy. If that means you being with someone that might shock us at first, then so be it. As long as this person makes you happy, that’s truly all that matters.”
Ash squinted at her mother. She did know something. Had Adrian finally run his mouth? But if he had, wouldn’t he have warned Ash before she came home this weekend? She’d just seen him at lunch and he hadn’t said a word about it.
“It’s still early days,” Ash said, and it felt so damn good to tell her mother something. “I have met someone, but…” She shook her head. “I can’t tell you about it yet, Mum. I just can’t.”
“Why not, darling?”
“You say that all you want is for me to be happy and I believe you, but, well, let’s just say reality might be a bit more complicated than that.”
“You’re making me awfully curious and worried now.”
“I know, which is why I didn’t want to say anything in the first place.” Quite frankly, Ash was bursting to tell her mother, to just get it off her chest. “Besides, we’re taking things very slowly and it may not work out. If that’s the case, I wouldn’t want to have created a fuss over nothing.”
“Over nothing? How can it be nothing if you like her so much?”
“How do you know how much I like her?”
Her mother briefly pursed her lips. “I have known you your entire life, Ashley. It might sound like a dreadful cliché but I know you better than you know yourself. The way you just walked in here, with your eyes sparkling and trying so hard to wipe that grin off your lips, that’s not the same person who left this house an hour ago. That’s not the same person who came back from the pub looking so lost, all I wanted to do was hug you and tell you everything would be okay, even though I didn’t know what the hell was going on.”
“Really?” Ash had thought she was hiding it so well. It must have been what Gloria did to her.
“Yes, darling. Really.” Her mother paused. “Look… full disclosure. I have an idea of whom it might be. Your father called me from the pub earlier and told me who you ran into.”
