Until Next Time

by Claudia Burgoa

  I’m tempted to say yes. It might be his touch that distracts me and makes me say stupid things like yes, let’s go steady. Plus, I like to go to open houses. Imagine what I could do if I could buy a lot and build my own place. That’s ridiculous, Autumn; think with your head. “No.”

  “No?”

  As lovely as it’d be to go with him, I have to set some boundaries before things get out of hand and our secret becomes the talk of everyone we know. “I work.”

  “No, you don’t. Matilda told me that’s your free day.”

  I shake my head. Of course, my kid told him my schedule. If I’m not careful, she’s going to go back to playing matchmaker. “You and my child shouldn’t be left alone. But thank you for keeping an eye on her. You literally saved my life.”

  “I doubt your life was in any danger, but I’m glad I was able to help. If you ever need me, I can be here right away. Actually, add me to your roster of babysitters.”

  “You want to be added to the roster?” I repeat the last part to make sure I heard him right. It’s crazy, isn’t it? “Why?”

  “We had fun. It’ll be easier than driving her to your mom’s. Which, by the way, she doesn’t like much,” he whispers the last sentence as if it’s a conspiratorial secret.

  Though his offer sounds amazing, I’m not sure if he realizes what he’s trying to sign up for. “Are you sure you want to be part of the team?”

  “It’d be my pleasure. We could do Saturday night so that we can spend Sundays together.”

  All of a sudden, things feel too serious or too comfortable. Probably both. I’ve dreamt of a guy who’d be here for us. Spending the weekends together, being my partner-in-crime as he helps me raise Matilda. But that guy died years ago. I have to remind myself that my chance is over, and I shouldn’t look for flying unicorns when I know they don’t exist.

  Noticing his blue nails, I find a safer subject. “Did you use my nail polish? I have a lipstick that matches it.”

  He chuckles. “Teddy said it’d be a good activity to do with a seven-year-old girl.”

  Does his sister know about us? Afraid of the answer, I focus on my kid. “Did Matilda paint her nails?”

  “No. She said that blue wasn’t her color, and you wouldn’t let her paint her nails until the end of the month.”

  I raise an eyebrow. “Impressive. She broke only a few rules.”

  “You seem surprised.”

  I chuckle. “She outsmarts a lot of people.”

  “I can see that. I let her get away with stuff because, as she said, I’m still new. I want her to trust me.”

  My child and her logic. She’s trying to see how far she can go with Zach. Hopefully, he’ll be smart enough to put a stop to her world domination plans while I’m not around. We talked about their evening. Even though I don’t plan to have Zach around for long, I’m glad that he and Matilda are getting to know each other.

  After I finish eating, I say, “Let me go and take a shower.”

  He gives me a mischievous smile. “Can I join you? I’m good at lathering skin.”

  “As long as you’re quiet.”

  “I’ll be as silent as a monk.”

  On Monday morning, I got a call from Aiden. “Hey, I’m sorry about yesterday.”

  “I’m just glad you guys are safe, but next time, call. I was worried about you guys.”

  “Sorry.” He exhales. “It was a nightmare. We couldn’t even call you.”

  “It’s okay. The important thing is that you’re safe and…Did you have fun?”

  He lets out a loud breath. “I think we did. Our marriage survived this trip. Well, yesterday, to be precise. It was a fucking nightmare. She didn’t kill me or leave me. That has to mean something, right?”

  “You two are adorable.”

  “She is adorable. I’m just her plus-one. So, what happened last night? Mom said you didn’t drop the pumpkin with her or call her to watch Matilda. Do you need me to pay for the tips you lost or something? I feel awful.”

  “It’s okay.” I don’t plan on telling him anything, except if I don’t do it, Matilda will, and I’m afraid of her story. “Zach helped me.”

  He growls. “Zach again?”

  “Is there a problem with that? Are people not allowed to help your sister because you have issues with them?”

  “No, it’s just strange. He’s been out of our lives for a long time.”

  “Your friendship with him is an issue between the two of you. He’s a good friend of mine.”

  More than a friend, but I’m not going to tell you about that, big brother.

  “How so?”

  “We have a lot in common.”

  And, of course, that’s not enough for him. “What can you possibly have in common with him? He’s a St. James. A wealthy playboy asshole, just like his brothers. The fact that he lived in Boston for the past twelve years doesn’t change anything.”

  He’s wrong, and I don’t like that he’s judging Zach. I get that after what happened with Dad, he resented all his friends. However, he forgets how much the St. Jameses and the Bradleys did for us.

  “Did you know he lost his wife?”

  “No?” I’m not sure why that word sounds like a question.

  “Well, he’s my grief buddy.”

  Aiden goes quiet. There’s nothing he can say that will top that statement. There’s no such thing as a grief buddy, but he backs off if I mention grief or anything related to Pax’s passing. My brother is so easy. Too easy.

  “Well, I’m glad you have someone. Just be careful.”

  “Why?”

  “You know the St. Jameses are trouble. They don’t have long-lasting relationships.”

  “Did you hear me when I said his wife died?”

  He groans.

  “Hey, I have to get Matilda ready for school. I’m glad you two are back and safe.”

  I don’t have the energy to discuss Zach, Aiden’s issues, or any other problem that might arise while I dodge his questions. So what if I found a temporary happiness? I might’ve lost the love of my life, but it’s okay to have someone playful who likes to steal kisses and holds me at night while I fall asleep. It’s going to last for a few moments, but they might be the best moments I’ve had in a long time.

  Chapter Twenty-Eight

  Monday, February 14th

  Zach: Happy Valentine’s Day. How was Matilda’s day?

  Autumn: It was good. She brought a lot of candy and cookies. I feel like every holiday at school is just an excuse to load the children with sugar. How was yours?

  Zach: It was busy. Mondays are always busy.

  Zach: As I was selling mugs to those who forgot to buy presents for their significant others, it occurred to me that you owe me some designs.

  Autumn: I do?

  Zach: Yes. And now, I’m wondering if you can also design seasonal products like fall mugs, summer cups, Valentine’s Day paraphernalia…

  Autumn: Sounds like an ambitious project. Why?

  Zach: I want to sell knick-knacks for every occasion, so my customers don’t look like idiots who drop by to get straws because they forgot to buy a present.

  Autumn: I can’t stop laughing about the straws. Please tell me that didn’t happen.

  Zach: It did. A guy just said, “Sell me whatever you have. I’ll even take a bendy straw.”

  Autumn: That’s pretty funny. I can do it, but I’m expensive.

  Zach: I can meet your hourly rate.

  Autumn: Let me play with some ideas. Send me your email address.

  Zach: When can I see you?

  Autumn: If you can be as quiet as last night…tonight.

  Zach: At what time do you want me there?

  Autumn: Ten?

  Zach: See you then.

  Tuesday, February 15th

  Autumn: At what time did you leave?

  Zach: Early enough that no one realized I was there.

  Autumn: Thank you for the wine and the chocolates.

&nbs
p; Zach: Thank you for inviting me to hang out with you.

  Autumn: Are you busy tonight?

  Zach: For you, never.

  Autumn: Let’s meet at ten.

  Zach: It’s a date.

  Wednesday, February 16th

  Zach: I received your ideas. Can we discuss them in person?

  Autumn: Are you trying to invite yourself to my place, Mr. St. James?

  Zach: I wish. I have to fly to Portland. The house search is a no-go. We’re having problems with the new branch, and I won’t be home until Friday.

  Autumn:: sad face emoji:

  Zach: I’m going to miss you too.

  Autumn: I never said I was going to miss you.

  Zach: You don’t have to, I know.

  Autumn: I’ll see you on Saturday then.

  Zach: Are you cutting me off?

  Zach: You can’t just ignore me for hours.

  Zach: Well, you can, but don’t do it, please.

  Autumn: Did you send a massage therapist to my place?

  Zach: Yes, I totally forgot. Did you enjoy your two-hour massage?

  Autumn: That was amazing. You’re the best.

  Zach: So, you enjoyed it?

  Autumn: Yes. It’s almost noon, and I’m so relaxed I could take a nap. Where are you?

  Zach: I’m on the plane.

  Autumn: We could have sexplane. I think you deserve it.

  Zach: I’m not sure what that is, but since I’m not alone, it’ll be a little hard. No pun intended.

  Autumn: Why didn’t you drive to Portland?

  Zach: Because it’s Portland, Maine.

  Autumn: That’s a long flight. Text me when you get there.

  Zach: We could FaceTime later tonight.

  Autumn: We could.

  Zach: By the way, pencil me in for Saturday. We have a full day.

  Autumn: I’m busy?

  Zach: Matilda told me you have the weekend off. Ergo, we can spend it together.

  Autumn: Matilda released too much information about my schedule. Just so you know, I have a kid.

  Zach: I know. Most of Saturday’s and Sunday’s activities are planned with her in mind. As long as I can have you at night.

  Autumn: I told you I don’t want her to get the wrong idea.

  Zach: She won’t, I promise.

  Autumn: I trust you.

  Zach: That means a lot to me.

  Autumn: Hey, I’m going to run a couple of errands. Text me when you land.

  Zach: : smiley face emoji:

  Zach: I just wanted to let you know that I landed. Text you later.

  Autumn: Hey, don’t call me tonight.

  Zach: What happened?

  Autumn: The school called me around two to inform me that my kid is sick. I think she has a bug. It’s going to be a long night.

  Zach: Do you need me there?

  Autumn: As I said, it’s just a bug, but I appreciate the offer.

  Zach: Call me if you need anything, okay?

  Autumn: You are amazing!

  Zach: I know, but why are we talking about the obvious?

  Autumn: You sent her balloons and a stuffy.

  Zach: Did she like them?

  Autumn: She loves them.

  Zach: How’s she feeling?

  Autumn: Still sick, but you brightened up her day.

  Zach: I’m glad. What do you think she’ll enjoy more? The San Diego Zoo or The Turtle Sanctuary?

  Zach: Hello!

  Zach: Everything okay?

  Zach: Babe?

  Autumn: Sorry, she threw up again. Cleaning was an epic event. :insert eye-roll emoji: I’m taking her to urgent care since she has a fever.

  Zach: Let me see if I can get a flight back home.

  Autumn: You don’t have to. I swear it’s okay.

  Autumn: Thank you for sending Teddy and a doctor to check on us, but as I said, it’s a bug.

  Zach: She told me.

  Autumn: She asked if we were dating. I told her no. Though my child said that she’d like to find a dad like you.

  Zach: She can do better than me.

  Autumn: If you’re fishing for compliments, I don’t have any for you.

  Zach: How are you doing?

  Autumn: I’m okay. I just hope this doesn’t make me sick. I have classes, work, and a lot of orders to fulfill.

  Zach: So, tonight is a definite no, huh? What if we FaceTime just so I can say good night to her?

  Autumn: Maybe another day. I might invite you to stay on Saturday.

  Zach: Saturday sounds promising.

  Thursday, February 17th

  Autumn: Thank you for the coffee and the pastries.

  Zach: How’s Matilda today?

  Autumn: She’s doing a lot better. I’m keeping her home. Mom’s coming to watch her while I go to school. She’s staying with us tonight.

  Zach: I’m glad you told me.

  Autumn: Why?

  Zach: I was planning on dropping by. I guess that’s a no.

  Autumn: I thought you said you’d be here tomorrow.

  Zach: I’m getting things done faster so I can get home tonight.

  Zach: By the way, I showed my partner your designs, and he likes them. We have a few changes and requests.

  Autumn: Send them over. I’ll work on them and invoice you. I could use the money.

  Zach: Thank you for the picture of Matilda and her new friend.

  Autumn: His name is Zach the Zebra.

  Zach: I’m glad I sent a zebra. He’s handsome. She looks happy.

  Autumn: She was up until Mom arrived. Though, I’m sure she’s better now that they’re baking a batch of chocolate chip cookies. I had no idea that there was a tub of cookie dough in my fridge. You’re sneaky.

  Zach: Honey, I’m home!

  Zach: Where are you?

  Zach: I assume you’re at work. Text me when you’re home unless you want me to pick you up.

  Autumn: Hey, I just finished my shift. I’ll text you when I arrive at my apartment.

  Zach: Are you home yet? It’s been more than an hour since you last texted me.

  Zach: Babe, I’m about to drive to your house.

  Autumn: Sorry, I was talking to Mom.

  Zach: Too late, I’m here. Any chance you can come outside?

  Autumn: Wait, you’re here?

  Zach: Yep, I was worried. I’m in the parking lot. Can you come downstairs?

  Autumn: Sorry, I’m watching a movie with Mom. I don’t want her to think that I’m going out with someone.

  Zach: My name is Zachary, not someone.

  Autumn: All the same. We agreed to keep this just between us.

  Zach: Fine. I’ll see you tomorrow. Text me when I can come by.

  Autumn: : kissing heart face emoji:

  Chapter Twenty-Nine

  Zach

  Any other time I’d say that my week was fucking awful. The branch in Portland, Maine, isn’t opening the first week of March as we planned. The pipes burst, the building is not up to code, and we must search for a new retail space. It sets us back, but it’s not important. I was more concerned about Matilda’s health than the coffee shop.

  I wish I had been able to fly across the country so that I could be with them. Thankfully, I have my brothers and sister to aid me. We got the family doctor who still does house visits to check on Matilda, and Teddy joined them just to make sure they were fine. Not knowing how she was doing and being far away from them was pure torture. Knowing that they were waiting for me when I got home meant everything to me.

  On Saturday, I’m ready to make everything better for Matilda. Myles comes through with his promise. We have a private tour at the San Diego Zoo, and he lends us his jet. Of course, we don’t say anything to Matilda until the doctor says it’s okay to travel. Even when it was just a twenty-four-hour bug, Autumn was reluctant to take her on this trip.

  We leave Seattle at five in the morning so we can arrive at the zoo by eight.

  “Can I see all the animals?” Matil
da’s energy level is too high for five o’clock in the morning. Autumn is nursing the coffee I brought her from home.

  “Yes, of course. This is a private tour. My brother explained to me that instead of seeing them from the outside like everyone else, you’d be able to watch from a different place. It’ll be closer but not too close.”

  “I want to be a zookeeper or a veterinarian. Can we meet all of them?”

  When I turn to look at Autumn, she’s asleep.

  “We might be able to meet one or two,” I say. “Why don’t we color in your zoo book?”

  Teddy prepared a traveling kit for Matilda since this was her first plane ride. So far, it’s been keeping her entertained. We arrive at the zoo ten minutes before eight. We have not one but two zookeepers answering Matilda’s questions.

  “You made her the happiest kid in the world,” Autumn says, kissing my cheek as she watches Matilda thriving. The kid is a sponge, and she loves learning. She reminds me a lot of Autumn when she was young. She was an inquisitive kid who bloomed with knowledge.

  Reaching for her hand, I pull her to me. “I just asked for a few favors. You’re raising a happy kid.”

  “Some days, I feel like I’m failing miserably.”

  I hug her tight. “You’re too harsh on yourself.”

  She moves away from me. “You have to keep your distance. She’s going to get the wrong idea.”

  I wouldn’t care if Matilda learned that I’m going out with the most amazing woman in the world. It’d be a dream if I could call them mine, but I know it’s just a pipe dream.

  Everything in the zoo is exciting. Matilda’s favorite parts are when she gets to be close to the animals. Like when she gets to play with a capuchin monkey safely. We feed lettuce leaves to the giraffes. She gets to pet a baby wallaby. Autumn feeds the wallaby with a baby bottle and special formula. We take a break to eat the lunch that Brandt prepared for us at the café. By two o’clock, we’re spent and ready to fly home.