A Woman's Worth

by Nikita Lynnette Nichols

  “Monique, it’s easy for you to sit there and tell me how I should behave because it’s not your breast with the lump in it. If the shoe was on the other foot, you wouldn’t be so calm, cool, and collected.”

  Arykah was absolutely right. Thousands of women died from breast cancer every year. And if Monique was honest with herself, she knew she’d be hysterical if she were facing a biopsy. She sat on the floor next to Arykah. “You know what, sis? You’re right. If it were me, I’d be a basket case. I’ll be honest and say that I’m also afraid, but like I said, we don’t know what the test will show. It’s my job to hold your hand and encourage you to be strong when you don’t wanna be. Trials come every day, but we can’t freak out and lose our heads over them. I believe that if we pray hard enough, whatever is in your breast will be gone by Friday.”

  Arykah placed her face in her hands and cried. “I hope so. I’m so scared.”

  Monique pulled Arykah into her arms. “I know you are, but we’ll get through this, I promise.” She held Arykah tightly. Listening to Arykah cry her heart out, Monique couldn’t help but to cry herself. “We gotta stop this, Arykah. I promised Adonis that I was gonna be the strong one.”

  Arykah pulled away from Monique and looked at her. “Adonis? You told him?”

  “Please don’t be mad at me. After you called, I had to get strength to come and comfort you. He wants you to know that he’s praying, and he told me to tell you that he’s just a phone call away.”

  Arykah wiped the tears from her eyes. “So you two are getting closer, huh?”

  “Oh my God, Arykah. This man is awesome. Today, he came by the radio station and . . .” Monique stopped herself. Surely after the day Arykah had had, the last thing she wanted to hear was how great and wonderful Adonis was.

  “Yeah, and? He came by the radio station and what?”

  “I’ll tell you later,” Monique said.

  “No, you’re gonna tell me now.”

  “I don’t want you to think that I’m trying to downplay your situation by bragging on Adonis.”

  “Monique, please, I know the man is all that. Tell me, I really wanna know. Plus I can use a pick-me-upper.”

  Monique turned on the living room lamp and sat on the sofa. “Well, I told you about the roses he sent to my office and all of the phone calls just to make sure I’m all right and to find out if I needed anything. And you saw the lilies in my hotel room. Well, today he came to the radio station and got the keys to my car. He claimed he was gonna get it washed, but when he returned it to me, it was shining like new gold. He bought brand new chrome rims, new floor mats, and installed a fifteen CD changer. Girl, he even bought new windshield wipers, plus he filled my gas tank.”

  Arykah was impressed. “Does this blessing come with a house, two kids and a dog?”

  “Humph, even if it did, I couldn’t take the blessing.”

  Arykah looked at Monique like she was from another world. “Excuse me?”

  “Don’t look at me like that, Arykah. You know I can’t go there with Adonis. He’s Boris’s cousin.”

  “And that means what, Monique? I can’t believe you’re still holding on to Boris.”

  “I’m engaged to the man. What do you expect me to do?”

  “I expect you to drop him like he dropped you.”

  “Boris didn’t drop me, I moved out. Remember?”

  “Oh yeah, I remember. I also remember you telling me that you were done with him for good, but if the wedding is still on, I guess this time is no different than all the other times you left him.”

  “What are you talking about?”

  “You really had me fooled this time. Packing up all your clothes, going to a hotel, not taking Boris’s calls and having him banned from the radio station showed me that you were really gonna leave that fool alone. But I see that you’re only going through the motions. But what I wanna know is why you’re wasting your time. Why bother putting on a front for everyone else? If you’re still engaged to the man, you may as well go on back home and stop pretending like you’re teaching Boris a lesson, because he ain’t trying to learn a darn thing. Boris is gonna do what he wants to do. He always has and he always will.”

  “That’s not true, Arykah. Every time I leave Boris, he apologizes and promises to do better.”

  Arykah exhaled loudly and looked into her best friend’s eyes. “Monique, your behind is dumb all day long. Did you hear what you just said? You said ‘every time I leave Boris.’ Why should you have to keep packing your bags every six months for this fool to realize he’s messing up? Can’t you see that this is a pattern with Boris? He ain’t never gonna change because he knows you’re gonna eventually come back to him, which is saying you accept the crap he puts out. And it’s wrong for you to string Adonis along.”

  “I’m not stringing Adonis along. He knows what I’m going through, and he’s only a friend.”

  “Monique, you’re playing with his emotions. You know the man is in love with you.”

  “I can’t help that, Arykah. You act like I did something to lead Adonis on.”

  Arykah’s eyebrows raised and she cocked her head to the side. “Did you?”

  Monique became quiet. She slowly stood and walked halfway across the living room then turned around and looked at Arykah. “This is why I didn’t want to tell you what Adonis did for me today, because I know you still have a crush on him.”

  Arykah leaned back against the sofa and crossed her ankles. She’d been doing good controlling her mouth, but right then, the devil was really trying to make her curse. “You need to bring your fat, wide, black behind back on over here and sit down, because I’m getting ready to check you real fast.”

  Monique didn’t move from her spot. She kept her gaze on Arykah.

  “For the record, whatever feelings or crush, as you call it, that I may have had for Adonis went out the window the moment I learned he only had eyes for you. And just so you know, I’m for the two of you getting together because I think you’ll make a great couple. What I’m telling you ain’t got nothing to do with me having a crush on Adonis because that’s not the case. This is about you permitting him to get closer and closer to you when your every intention is to go back to Boris.

  “You’re allowing Adonis to invest his time, money, and his heart in something that you don’t want to prosper, and I’m telling you it’s the wrong thing to do. He’s gonna end up getting hurt and feeling like you used him, which is exactly what you’re doing.”

  Monique’s head snapped backward. “I’m using him? First of all, you and I wear the same size in clothes, so if I’m fat, you’re fat. And how am I using Adonis? I don’t ask him for anything. He sends flowers to my job and my hotel room. He calls me all the time. What do you want me to do?”

  “I want you to act like you got some morals and an ounce of dignity. Adonis is head over heels in love. He’s buying you things and reaching out to you because he thinks he may actually have a chance of being with you. So you need to do the right thing and set him straight before he becomes more involved than he already is.”

  After the argument over Adonis, Monique talked Arykah into putting some food in her stomach. At nine p.m., they drove to Lem’s BarB-Que on 51st and State Street. Back at Arykah’s house, they sat at the kitchen table, licked mild sauce from their fingers, and talked until the wee hours of the morning. Finally, at three in the morning, Monique announced to Arykah she was headed back to her hotel suite.

  “Girl, it’s too late and dangerous for you to be out alone. You’re gonna stay the night,” Arykah demanded.

  “I don’t have a change of clothes.”

  “I have a closet full. You can shower and go to work from here.”

  “I would rather sleep in my own bed.”

  Arykah rose from the table and threw their trash into the garbage can. “And I would rather be in a size twelve. You are not leaving my house at this hour. So come on upstairs and get in the bed with me.”

  “Ar
ykah, I can be downtown in twenty minutes. I’ll call you when I get in my room.”

  Arykah removed Monique’s car key from her key ring. “I’m gonna put this under my pillow. If you take it and leave my house before I wake up in the morning, you’ll have hell to pay.”

  As they walked upstairs to Arykah’s bedroom, Monique figured out a way to get her key back. “Well, you know I sleep naked, right?”

  “Not in my bed.”

  “That’s the only way I can get a good night’s sleep, Arykah.”

  Arykah opened her top dresser drawer and gave Monique a nightgown. “Monique, don’t play with me. Put this on, get in the bed and shut up. And I know you’re going through a drought season right now, so make sure to stay on your side of the bed and don’t try anything funny.”

  Chapter 8

  The alarm clock woke Arykah up at six a.m. Lazily, she reached over to the nightstand to shut it off. She sat up on the bed, then looked over at Monique still sleeping. Arykah silently thanked God for her. If there was ever a true friend in this world, Monique Morrison was the one. In the ten years they’d been best friends, Arykah couldn’t remember a single time when Monique hadn’t come through for her. Whether it was money, a prayer partner, advice, a shoulder to cry on, or a swift kick in the butt, Monique was there to deliver whatever Arykah needed, and for that, she was grateful. Even during the situation with her breast, it was just like Monique to come running to Arykah’s side to hold her hand. Whatever the outcome of Friday’s test, Arykah was glad she didn’t have to face it alone.

  She tapped Monique’s shoulder. “Wake up, sleepyhead.”

  Monique turned onto her side, facing away from Arykah with her eyes closed. “It can’t possibly be morning already.”

  Arykah got out of bed and went into the bathroom to brush her teeth.

  “Can you please turn the water on in the shower?” Monique asked Arykah as she walked out of the bedroom. She lay in Arykah’s bed another three minutes, then forced herself to get up. She walked into the bathroom and saw Arykah standing at the sink examining her naked left breast.

  “You wanna feel the lump?” Arykah asked Monique. Without waiting for an answer, Arykah grabbed Monique’s hand and pressed it directly beneath her left breast then rotated her hand in a circular motion. “Can you feel it?”

  “No.”

  She pressed Monique’s hand deeper into her breast and kept rotating.

  “Now I feel it. I would say it’s about the size of a golf ball.”

  “That’s what my doctor said.”

  Monique pulled the shower curtain back. She raised the gown over her head, let it fall to the floor, and stepped in the hot running water. “Well, don’t worry about it, because it’ll be gone by Friday.”

  In spite of her ungodly relationship and prior living arrangements with Boris, Arykah knew Monique had a divine and direct connection with the Lord. When it came to petitioning the throne of grace, Monique was a powerhouse in the Holy Ghost. At church, her prayers brought the house down many a day.

  “You promise?” Arykah asked.

  “Yep, I got the hook up. Me and Jesus, we’re tight. We’re here.” Monique brought two fingers up to her eyes and moved them back and forth in front of her face.

  After her shower, Monique opened Arykah’s closet door to select something to wear to work. Arykah walked up behind her. “You can’t wear anything that has a price tag on it.”

  “Why not?”

  “Because, I haven’t worn it yet.”

  Monique chose a two-piece navy pantsuit by Chanel. Arykah took it out of her hand and hung it back in the closet. “Nope, not this one. I paid fifteen hundred dollars for it.”

  Monique’s next selection was a red, silk, knee length sarong dress. Arykah grabbed it and hung it back in the closet as well. “Uh-uh. No can do. That’s a Donna Karan original.”

  Monique’s temper was on level five and slowly rising. If it got to ten, all heck was going to break loose. Since Arykah was acting funny with her dress clothes, Monique opted for something casual. She didn’t have any meetings scheduled that day, so casual wear was ideal. She chose a black cashmere sweater and a pair of black denim jeans.

  Again, Arykah hung what Monique had selected back in the closet. “You can’t wear this outfit either. It’s Tommy Hilfiger, and I only wore it once.”

  Monique stepped back and looked at her. “Why don’t you just give me a Hefty garbage bag? I’ll cut a hole in the bottom of it and slip it over my head.”

  “I think I can do a little bit better than a Hefty bag,” Arykah said.

  Monique sat on the bed and waited for Arykah to decide what she’d allow her to wear. “This is why I should’ve taken my behind to my hotel room.”

  Arykah didn’t respond. She brought Monique an A-line, plain looking, khaki colored dress that buttoned down the front.

  Monique eyed the dress in disgust. “You gotta be kidding me, Arykah. Gravy’s got a dress just like that and she’s fifty-three years old.”

  “This happens to be a Claire James, Monique.”

  “Who is Claire James?”

  Arykah shrugged her shoulders. “The heck if I know.”

  Monique had reached level ten. If Arykah wasn’t facing a biopsy on Friday, Monique would’ve gone to war with her. She snatched the dress from Arykah and laid it on the bed.

  “Oh, my God. It’s almost seven o’clock. I gotta get in the shower,” Arykah said. She gave Monique an air kiss, then rushed into the bathroom. Monique waited five minutes, then went into the bathroom and flushed the toilet. Suddenly cold water attacked Arykah’s body. She screamed, and the name she called Monique wasn’t nice, but Monique felt justified.

  Adonis came upstairs from the basement, on his way to the shower, only to find Kita standing at the stove scrambling eggs. What stunned Adonis was the pink lace bra and panty set she was modeling. She looked at Adonis standing at the top of the stairs in his pajama bottoms. In his hands were a towel, a toothbrush and a bar of soap.

  “Good morning, handsome. Can I make you some breakfast?” Kita asked Adonis seductively.

  “You can’t do nothing for me,” he responded disgustingly.

  On his way to the bathroom, Kita admired his physically fit torso. “You should let me rub baby oil on your chest to lay those hairs down.”

  Adonis made a beeline to Boris’s bedroom and saw him getting dressed. “Look, cuz, if you’re gonna have that broad up in here, the least you can do is tell her to put some clothes on. You ain’t the only one living here, and personally, I don’t wanna see her naked tail.”Adonis didn’t wait for Boris to comment or respond. He went into the bathroom and slammed the door.

  Ten minutes into his shower, Adonis heard the bathroom door open and close. He peeked from behind the shower curtain and saw Kita prepare to use the restroom. Adonis couldn’t believe the gall of her. “What the heck are you doing?” he frowned.

  “What does it look like?” She answered a question with a question.

  Adonis snatched the shower curtain closed. He heard the toilet flush, then the water turned cold and chilled him. When the door opened and closed, it dawned on him that Kita didn’t even bother to wash her hands. “Nasty broad,” he said to no one in particular.

  Monique came from her office and approached Theresa’s desk. “Theresa, I need you to pull some files for me.”

  She looked at the way Monique was dressed. “What are you wearing?”

  “I didn’t go home last night.”

  Theresa’s mouth dropped open. “Ah, sooky, sooky, now.”

  “Don’t go there. I spent the night with Arykah. This is her dress.”

  “Monique, tell that to somebody who doesn’t know any better. I know Arykah’s style. Every time she comes here, she is as sharp as a tack. She wouldn’t be caught dead in that dress.”

  Monique folded her arms across her chest and looked at her secretary. “You think you have it all figured out, don’t you?”

  “
Yep, I’ll tell you what happened,” Theresa said.

  Monique exhaled. “This should be good.”

  “You hooked up with Adonis last night. Next thing you knew, you were singing that Shirley Murdock song. It’s morning and we’ve slept the night away.” Theresa sang the lyrics and swayed in her chair.

  Although Monique didn’t want to, she had to chuckle. She shook her head from side to side, but couldn’t deny the fact that Theresa amused her. “Girl, would you please do me and the rest of the world a favor and get saved?”

  “I’m right, Monique, and I know it. You didn’t have time to go to your hotel room and change clothes this morning and you were forced to stop at Wal-Mart and buy something to wear to work because Saks, Lord & Taylor, and Macy’s weren’t open yet.”

  “You know what I’m gonna do for you, Theresa? I’m gonna recommend that you see the company’s therapist, because there is really something wrong with you.”

  “Monique, no one’s judging you. You and Adonis can do whatever you wanna do.”

  “Look, Theresa, whatever you have concocted in that twisted mind of yours ain’t happening, okay?”

  “But I bet you wouldn’t mind if it did. Monique, you ain’t fooling anybody. This is me you’re talking to. Adonis is righteously gorgeous. He’s built like his middle name should be Hercules, and he worships you. Can you honestly look into my eyes and tell me that if the opportunity presented itself, you wouldn’t jump his bones?”

  Even though Monique was dark skinned, her cheeks turned crimson red. “Theresa, I refuse to answer a ridiculous question, and this inappropriate conversation is over.”

  Theresa studied her face. “You’re blushing. I didn’t mean to get you riled up.”

  She gave Theresa a list of names. “Ain’t nobody riled up. Get me these files, and please stay out of my business.”

  When Monique sat behind her desk and picked up the telephone to call Arykah, her computer spoke to her. “You got mail”

  She placed the receiver on its base and typed in the password to open her mailbox.