A Cowboy's Homecoming
Page 19
“Not for your sake,” she said to Noah.
Cody didn’t react to her obvious displeasure. “Next week, if the ground isn’t hard as rock, our builders should start on the new house.”
“The barn too,” Willow said, “but the outdoor ring will have to wait until spring.”
“It’s been a hard winter so far.” Noah gestured at the snow on the ground. He heard a bellow from the pasture, where the WB’s best bull made some protest. One of the horses whinnied in answer. “Mom tells me you two have already started your own training business.”
That had been Willow’s dream since she was indeed a kid. Cody’s, too, he supposed. Their first bond had been over horses. “We’ve been using the WB’s facilities so far.” Cody glanced toward the house. “Zach here yet?”
“Haven’t seen him since the day I arrived.”
“Finally,” Willow murmured.
Okay. This was his cue to apologize when Noah, who’d struggled to find the necessary words for Margot, didn’t know how to start again. What he’d done to Willow was basically unforgivable. What could he say that might heal the breach between him and the baby sister he adored?
Noah would have preferred to do this with just the two of them here, but she obviously needed her husband’s support.
“Willow, I’m sorry I missed out on the best day of your life. If I could, I’d turn back the clock, do it all different.” He tried to gauge her expression but failed there too. Cody had pulled her closer, his lips against her hair.
Noah’s voice cracked. “I should have been home to walk you down the aisle with Zach on your other side, but instead I was on a plane to London when you said your vows with Cody. With the time change, and the mess with the new branch office there, I only realized what the date was when your wedding was already over.”
He heard tears in her voice. “You didn’t even phone.”
Later that night—or rather, the next morning—when he’d landed overseas, Noah had tried but failed to get a good-enough signal for the call, and when he tried again later, she hadn’t answered. Perhaps she’d been on her flight to New York by then, but the damage had been done. Their few brief texts while she was on her honeymoon hadn’t broken the ice.
“Tell me what I can do to make this better.”
She rolled her eyes. “Really? You snap your fingers, and everything will be fine again? Noah, you hurt me.”
“Believe me, I didn’t mean to, and if it takes the rest of my life, I’ll do anything—give anything—to make that up to you.”
As a child, Willow had worshipped him, and whenever her world went wrong, she’d come to Noah, taking shelter in his arms from a breakup with her best friend or from their father’s wrath. Now she leaned against Cody in silence.
“I know. I really am the prodigal son.” Noah deserved whatever punishment she chose. “Let me have it, Willow. Give me your worst.”
“Right now, I’d like to brain you with an iron skillet for missing my big show.” She moved a little, glanced up at him, then down again. “That is, after I remember my manners. Thank you for the gifts you sent,” she said stiffly. “You were too generous.”
“Never that,” he said. Noah had given them a full set of the sterling silver flatware pattern she’d chosen and a large check.
“It may be a while before I actually send out thank-you notes.” Then she surprised him. “But after another whole year, my goodness, you’re actually here again.”
Cody laughed a little. “Man, you’re in for it. I almost pity you.” Then he sobered. “Just for the record, Noah, don’t ever hurt her like that again.”
Willow gazed at Cody, her love for him in her eyes. “That’s my man.” The tense set of her shoulders had relaxed, but she didn’t smile. “You’re not off the hook,” she told Noah, adding, as Cody had said, “Just for the record.”
“I don’t expect to be.”
He also didn’t expect what happened next. Willow suddenly moved, Cody’s arm slipped from her shoulders and she slid into Noah’s embrace as if she’d never left. “Welcome home.”
He swallowed, hard. “I should be saying that to you.” And he repeated those very words.
“I do love you, Noah,” Willow murmured. “You big dummy.”
While he was digesting that, grateful that she would save any further punishment for later, the front door opened, and with a glad cry, their mother charged down the porch steps, then flung herself at him and Willow in a three-way hug. Cody stood back, grinning.
Noah’s sister was home. He was free to go.
Which didn’t please him as much as he’d thought it would.
* * *
THE NEXT NIGHT, under a leaden sky that matched her spirits, Kate drove toward the WB. She couldn’t say Noah’s invitation had come as a surprise, but she hadn’t expected to dread what was surely ahead and had been from the day he’d stepped off the plane in Kansas City.
Teddie drummed his legs against his car seat, looking out as she turned in at the gates. “Mommy, are we going to the WB?”
“We’re having dinner with Mr. Bodine and his family.” Kate hadn’t told him earlier what the occasion was, or his excitement would have been off the charts before a big letdown.
“Yay!”
“Be on your best behavior, Bunny.” There was no way to prepare him for what would happen later. Maybe she should have come alone, yet the invitation had included Teddie.
He made a face that Kate saw in her rearview mirror. “I hope I don’t have to eat stuff like mushy peas or ’sparagus.”
“You will eat what’s put on your plate.”
Teddie heaved a sigh. “Did you bring me a snack—I could eat in the barn.”
“Maybe you could not.”
Her smile was forced as she parked the truck. Tonight, she felt sure, would be goodbye. Willow was home, Noah had told her on the phone. There was no further reason for him to stay, and after they’d managed to make their peace over Rob’s death, for her to want him to. Even to consider friendship again themselves. And she worried about Teddie. Better to keep things light and hope for the best.
They left the pickup and went up the porch steps. Noah answered the door, his smile looking as tight as Kate’s had been.
He put a hand on her shoulder, and Kate had a flash memory of his touch in the spare room’s bathroom, the taste of his mouth. Just friendship? “Come on in. Hope you brought ear plugs—things are noisy.” He bent down to Teddie’s level. “Hey, short stuff. You up for a nice steak?”
They exchanged a complex series of hand signals in greeting. “Did the cow live on the WB?” Teddie wanted to know.
Noah shot Kate a look that said, Did I just make a mistake here? “Yeah, it did. Finest beef in Kansas except for Sweetheart Ranch.”
That didn’t bother Teddie who was a ranch kid, as Kate had been—and after that she didn’t have time to worry about anything else. Like honored guests, they were drawn into the circle of the Bodine family, plunged into the noisy atmosphere Noah had warned her about. She couldn’t help but feel at home. Jean was famous for her hospitality, and dinner was delicious. So was dessert, and Teddie had two helpings of apple pie. Kate had little appetite.
The conversation later in the living room flowed, mostly about Willow and Cody’s honeymoon. The newlyweds showed pictures of their side trips to Savannah, Charleston and Hilton Head, and Kate, without wanting to, envied their happiness.
“You’re off to a great start,” she told Willow. “That honeymoon, the new house, your business...”
“Pretty exciting. I keep pinching myself. How did I ever land this guy after all?” She sat close to Cody on the sofa, her head on his shoulder. They were holding hands.
Kate’s first days with Rob had been idyllic, too, and she’d thought that was forever. Now, instead of wrestling with his father on the rug, Te
ddie was playing chess with Noah, their heads close together. She knew better than to wish for anything more.
“Booked my tickets to LaGuardia,” he’d said in an aside during a rare quiet moment before dinner. “Leaving first thing tomorrow.” Then he hadn’t continued, as if he, too, was reluctant to have his interlude at the WB end.
He glanced up now from the game and caught Kate’s eye. Her son had never played before but had quickly caught on to the strategy as he had once with Gabe about some video game. “Teddie, you’re a tough opponent.” The two shook hands, and Teddie crowed about his victory. Noah said, “Mom, there must be a reward of some kind for this boy—hot cocoa? With marshmallows?”
Jean rose to take Teddie’s hand. “Come with me. I may have a cookie or two left.”
Willow and Cody stood too. “Think we’ll wander down to the barn, say goodnight to the horses. Those few that were here when we left on our honeymoon. I’m afraid they will have gotten lazy but with Zach away too they haven’t had training.” Their ploy seemed so obvious that Kate guessed Noah had asked for time alone with her earlier. Kate hugged Willow. She had missed her friend.
“It’s good to have you home. Let’s get together soon.”
Willow looked astonished. Kate didn’t often leave home to socialize. “Oh, and I imagine the Girls will be after me about the next meeting.”
“Count on it, Willow.”
Cody leaned down to kiss Kate’s cheek. “Thanks for coming tonight.”
“’Night, Cody. Congratulations again. You’ve got a great woman.”
“Don’t I know it.” He and Willow went out the door, hand in hand, and Kate’s throat tightened. She knew what Noah was going to say.
“Not much time left,” he began, then moved to sit beside her on the sofa.
“You must be eager to get back to your business. The real one, I mean.”
His gaze held hers. “Hasn’t been a hardship, though, here at the WB.”
Kate attempted another smile. “What am I hearing? A cowboy after all?”
“Not really but being back here has shown me what I’ve missed.” He reached for her hand. “Kate, that includes you, and about that friendship... I can’t leave without telling you what else I already feel.” He paused. “I wouldn’t be honest if I didn’t let you know that I’ve had...feelings for you for a long time. Before you even started seeing Rob. Way back you were too young for me to do anything about that, and later, because he and I were friends, I sure couldn’t poach on his territory. So I let that go—you—and I wish I hadn’t.”
“Don’t say any more, Noah.”
“I have to. I think...we could actually make this thing work. See where it goes beyond friendship if—when—the time is right.”
“I can hardly say I don’t care about you, too, after that kiss we shared. But I never imagined how you felt...and I did marry Rob. You’d already moved east then while our lives remained here.”
He said it for her: “Until I made him that offer he didn’t refuse.” She had forgiven him for the attack but not for that.
“Yes, and nothing was ever the same between Rob and me.”
“I’m sorry, Kate, but he grabbed that chance with both hands and didn’t regret his choice.” Noah hesitated. “He wasn’t happy at Sweetheart Ranch. Surely you knew that.”
“I didn’t know.”
“Or didn’t want to admit you did?” Noah pushed on. “The money worries I mentioned before were only part of that. By nature, Rob wasn’t a cowboy any more than I am.”
She withdrew her hand from his. “He certainly gave a good impression of one.”
“He did a good job, but he’d grown up in town, and he stayed on that ranch for you until—for his own well-being, his future and your family’s—he couldn’t stay any longer.”
“That’s untrue.”
“Is it? Think. Why else would he change his whole life from country to city? That was an enormous shift. His greatest regret was that you refused to join him in New York, to bring Teddie there. That tore Rob apart. In fact, the night of the attack, we touched on his quitting because he couldn’t see any way to keep you otherwise.”
A chill ran down Kate’s spine. “I hope you’re not saying it’s my fault he left for New York. I was blindsided by his decision. I needed time to adjust—to decide—and when I did, I couldn’t make that move. Goodness, if I needed proof that my life is here, there’s that wedding I attended in Manhattan. I couldn’t wait to get back to Sweetheart Ranch.”
“Which you haven’t left since. I don’t think it’s that simple.” He held her gaze. “Kate, you can’t hide there forever. There’s a larger world—”
“Your world. Look what that did to Rob.”
His eyes darkened. “Look at Teddie now. You’re doing him a disservice by holding him back from those bigger adventures we talked about. Someday he won’t thank you for that. He won’t be four years old forever.”
Kate went rigid. “I accused you once of co-opting my son. It seems I wasn’t wrong. You’re trying to do that now.”
“I’m not. But I do care about him. I care about you. What are you so afraid of?”
That was easy, but she wasn’t about to share. Rob’s death, she’d vowed, would be the last tragedy in their lives. She couldn’t risk Teddie’s safety, her own peace or either of their hearts. “I’m not willing to gamble on Teddie’s security.”
“How does our relationship affect that?”
Kate waved one hand. “Your ‘larger’ life isn’t ours. You’ll keep on flying to London, or wherever, just like Meg’s ex does, expanding your business with J&B, but we belong here—and this is where we’ll stay. I can’t see any other path, Noah.”
“I didn’t ask you to move to New York.” Not yet. “But in the meantime—”
Teddie burst back into the room with Jean. “Mom! I had six marshmallows in my hot chocolate! Big ones!”
She could barely respond except to hold him close. “He’ll probably be up all night,” she told Jean.
Noah’s mother glanced between Kate and Noah. Her expression clearly said, Is something wrong?
Kate looked around for their jackets. “It’s going to snow again. Nothing new, but I was just telling Noah I’d like to get home before the storm moves in.” With that small lie, she made her quick goodbyes, blinked as Teddie hugged Jean, then turned toward the door with his hand in hers. Noah was right behind them.
“I’ll walk you out.” At her truck, Teddie climbed into his car seat, his attention focused on the complex series of restraints. “Kate, we haven’t finished—”
“I’m afraid we have.”
He waited while she checked the seat, as she always did. “Before you go, I need to speak to him. I wouldn’t want to leave tomorrow without letting Teddie know.”
“When we get home, I can tell him.” After you’re out of his life.
“I think that should come from me. He trusts me and that’s important.”
Kate had to admire Noah. Not every man would be as sensitive to a child’s needs. If he didn’t say the words himself, Teddie might resent him. Surely, no matter who told him, he would grieve. She’d always known that.
“All right, then. Please keep it simple.”
She stepped back while Noah spoke quietly to Teddie. She watched her son’s face begin to crumple, watched Noah lean in over the car seat to awkwardly embrace him. Teddie gripped Noah’s shoulders. When Noah pulled away, he looked broken, as he had the night they’d talked about angels. His voice was tight. “See you soon, short stuff.”
As Noah gently closed the door, Teddie was crying. “You can’t go!”
Kate had no words. She merely shook her head at Noah, who did the same.
“I made things worse, didn’t I?”
“No, you were right, Noah. He did need to hear that from you.�
�� She watched her breath frost in the cold air and huddled deeper into her parka. More snow was coming, all right. She should thank him for all he’d done, for his kindness to Teddie, for the way he’d treated her. She couldn’t speak. With her throat shut, Teddie still sobbing and maternal guilt twisting her insides, she got into the truck and drove off.
“He doesn’t have to go, Mommy!” Teddie wailed. “I won’t let him!”
“Yes, he does, Bunny. I’m sorry too.”
In her rearview mirror Noah watched them until she reached the gate and turned toward Sweetheart Ranch.
CHAPTER NINETEEN
IN THE MIDDLE of the night, Noah jolted awake. He’d only been dozing, wishing he hadn’t made Teddie cry, but someone was pounding now on the WB’s door downstairs. His heart racing, he jumped out of bed, fumbled into his clothes, then ran down the steps. His mother, wearing a fleecy robe, followed after him. “What’s happened, Noah?”
“I don’t know. No good news comes at two a.m.”
Expecting to see the sheriff—had something happened to Cass and Zach?—he flung open the door. Instead, Kate stood there, wild eyed, her face bluish-white in the overhead porch light. Snow sifted down on her shoulders. “Noah, is Teddie with you?”
“No.”
Her face fell. “I went to check on him, and his bed was empty. I looked all over the house, but he wasn’t anywhere.” She gulped in a breath. “I—I didn’t know where else to turn.”
“I’m glad you chose me.” Noah drew her inside. She was trembling, not merely from the cold. Jean hugged her, then rushed toward the kitchen to put on a pot of coffee. No one was going to sleep until Teddie was found.
“Earlier, when I put him to bed, he was still crying. I sat with him until I thought he’d finally fallen asleep. Then a few minutes ago...” Kate couldn’t go on. “I prayed he might be here—although how would he cross our land by himself in this storm?—but obviously he’s not.”
“He can’t have gone far.” Noah called up the stairs. “Cody! Willow! Get up. We need you down here.”