Nefarious Boys: A Dark High School Romance (Broken Saints Society 3)

by Leia Thorne

  Roland’s laugh is mocking. “Are you fucking serious? You’re going to use that lame-ass, busted guy logic on me?” He shakes his head. “Fuck you, Sawyer.”

  I’ve never seen her look so…ashamed. It doesn’t fit her beautiful face. She’s strong and powerful, and made unyielding. She’s not meant to appear so vulnerable. Yet that’s exactly what she is in this moment.

  I inch backward toward the stairs. That’s when Gage seems to notice me for the first time. He draws up his slacks and turns his hard gaze on me. “Where are you going?”

  I grab hold of the wood railing. “You told me that it wasn’t like this between you two,” I say. I hate how pathetic my voice sounds. I swore an oath to him, and jealousy wasn’t a part of the deal. But how can I not feel this betrayal? I’m fucking human.

  He walks toward me, and I try not to notice his erection tenting his pants or the sexy body that does bad things to me and drives me crazy. I hold my place as he reaches out and tucks a loose strand of hair behind my ear.

  “I told you that I didn’t have romantic feelings for Sawyer,” he clarifies, and I try not to inhale his scent. “We’ve gone over this, Remi. I thought you understood. Fucking has nothing to do with romance.”

  Roland scoffs. “Don’t try to twist her head with your manipulative bullshit.”

  I swallow. The feel of Gage’s touch grounds me to this spot, and I’m terrified to leave…or to stay.

  “What do you want, Remi?” Gage asks me.

  I look at Sawyer. Despite her rare vulnerability—or maybe because of it—she’s still stunning. She’s the epitome of what every girl at Brighton longs to be. She’s what I wanted to be. In control of my own destiny. The one who makes the rules.

  Sawyer would have never accepted the fate that took my life away. That stole my mother and changed my course forever.

  Even now, she holds her head high as she looks at Roland. She will win him in the end. Because that’s who she is. She will have Gage and Roland and anyone else she wants.

  I clear my throat. “I want to be in control,” I say.

  Gage’s eyebrows hike in surprise. He palms my face with both hands, tilting my gaze up toward him as he towers over me. “No pain. No fear. No limitations to hold you back. Isn’t that what I promised you?”

  I nod against his hands.

  “Then you have to completely let go of all those reservations, Remi.”

  “God, this is such utter shit,” Roland interrupts. “Remi, do you hear him? You can’t buy into this crap.”

  My gaze snaps his way. “What are you going to do?” I ask him. “Walk away from Sawyer and never talk to her again? Why are we here, Roland? Why did you come after her? What…” I trail off, my voice breaking. I’m not sure what to do or say. All I know is that I can’t walk away and pretend that I don’t want to be a part of the elite’s world.

  “He’s angry because he’s hurt,” Gage says, his eyes staring into mine. “That’s the very reason why we have to let go of primitive sentiments. Emotions control us. Manipulate us. We have to be in control and dominate every aspect of ourselves.”

  “Right,” Roland cuts in. “Let’s test this theory.” He stalks toward us and forcefully removes Gage’s hands from me. Turning me to face him, Roland grasps the back of my neck. His heated gaze rakes over me in one angry sweep before his mouth crashes against mine.

  Stunned, my reaction is delayed. I plant my hands against his chest and try to back him away, but his mouth is firm as it slants over mine. I yield to the kiss. I open up to him and taste his fury as his lips osculate against mine in a brutal kiss meant to inflict pain.

  I’m not the intended target, however. The harm done here is meant to exact injury on Sawyer.

  I should feel used—but there’s a deep, dark voice inside me that yearns to punish Gage just as savagely. I wrap my arms around Roland’s shoulders, press my body to his, and kiss him back with equal intensity.

  I have no idea if the intended effect is working, or if I’m just making a fool out of myself. Kissing Roland—my friend—in the middle of a darkened bell tower in front of the guy I’ve fallen for and the girl he was just fucking…

  My thoughts slice through me like a blade, and I pull away to sever the kiss. Roland’s breaths are ragged, his slate gaze nearly black as he stares intently at my features. There’s a question in his eyes, maybe a touch of remorse. But instead of voicing his concern, he conceals his emotions and turns a lethal glare on Sawyer.

  “So, do you agree with your stepbrother?” he asks her. “Are we all just carnal vehicles for lust and debauchery? Or do you feel something in that black heart of yours?”

  “Roland…” Sawyer takes another step toward him, her voice trailing off. “Of course I feel,” she pleads.

  He crosses his arm, defensive. “What?” he demands, his voice rising. “What do you feel?”

  Naked and exposed, Sawyer matches his stance, using her arms to cover her breasts. It’s so out of character for her to shield herself from anyone. She drops her gaze to the floor. “Why did you have to come here—?”

  Roland doesn’t answer her. A heavy beat of silence descends around us. It forces me to face my own suspicions of why I came to this bell tower. What did witnessing the proof with my own eyes earn me? What do I do now?

  As if answering my unspoken question, Gage moves in behind Sawyer, like he’s making his choice. In this instance, I realize I’ll never be enough for him. Sawyer is his queen. I may have won the crown, but it has always belonged to her.

  A hollow ache carves out my chest, and I take measured breaths to keep the tears from welling. Don’t do this. Don’t feel this.

  Roland stands beside me, anchored to this place just as I am. Wanting, needing to leave—but knowing there’s nowhere to run. We’re seeing this through to the twisted end. Our hearts betraying us.

  Gage sweeps Sawyer’s blond layers from her shoulder, his fingertips trail her exposed skin. He whispers something near her ear before he directs his gaze on Roland. “What would you do, Masters? Put her in a box? Keep her all to yourself? How long do you think that would work for our beautiful bird?”

  Roland sneers. “This has nothing to do with clipping Sawyer’s wings, you douchebag. But I sure as shit don’t want to share her with a sick fuck like you.”

  Gage shrugs, indifferent. “But you’ll share her with Remi?”

  All eyes suddenly land on me. I cross my arms. “What do I have to do with any of this?”

  Gage’s hand roams down Sawyer’s belly as his gaze watches me closely. Heat blooms across my face, my body responding to his touch as if his hands were touching me. I hate my body for deceiving me like this. I glance at the floor, unable to hold his stare.

  “You have everything to do with this, Remi,” Gage says, pulling my eyes toward him once more. “If not for you, none of us would be here right now. Sawyer would still be denying her desire to be with me, and Roland would still be pining after the girl he’ll never be good enough for.” He laughs. “Oh, sorry. That one still counts.”

  Roland lunges toward Gage, his hand clenched in a fist. “You’re a piece of shit, Astor.”

  “And you’ve had a vendetta against me ever since I first stuck my cock in sweet little Lesley, Masters.”

  Gage’s words stop Roland from advancing any further. He turns toward the wall and slams his fist against the stone.

  “That’s why you’re the one who aired that fucking video tonight,” Gage says.

  Sawyer’s face pales. “That’s not true,” she says to Gage. “He wouldn’t do that.”

  Gage sends her a side glance. “Why? Because he’s in love with you? He wouldn’t hurt you?” He chuckles. “I can’t believe how weak you’ve become.”

  Anger flares inside me. For some reason, I want to speak out, to side with Sawyer on this one. I know Roland. But as I’m mentally going over it, Roland’s comment from earlier today comes back to me, about the possibility of there being surveillance at t
he penthouse. Only…he wouldn’t have enough time to find the video and stage the whole thing. Even if he did, he wouldn’t really want to hurt Sawyer just to get back at Gage, would he?

  Roland clasps his injured hand, his knuckles red with fresh scrapes. “I wouldn’t do that to you, Sawyer,” he says, meeting her eyes across the room. “I’m not like you, or him.” He glances around. “I’m not like any of you.”

  He has every right to feel betrayed, to judge us.

  A sick feeling coats my stomach. The night of the initiation comes back clearly. The look in Gage’s eyes as he fucked me, as he stared across at Sawyer. It was all a game, some clever chess match, and Gage has won.

  He used me to…what? Make Sawyer jealous? My thoughts tunnel as I watch Gage’s hand cup Sawyer’s sex. Her eyes drift closed at the sensation, allowing Gage to slide his fingers between her thighs and caress her.

  He fondles her like a prized trophy. Dangling his horded candy in front of the other kids’ faces in a ruthless taunt. He pushes his fingers inside her, and she lets him.

  I’m wet. I’m ashamed that I’m turned on…but it’s as if my body has been conditioned. I know what pleasure comes from Gage’s touch. I know how far that high can climb during an orgasm. I can loathe everyone in this room, but hate, love…? It has nothing to do with physical craving.

  And just like that, the pieces come together. A light dawns. Gage’s practices that, to anyone outside of his society, are considered crude and even wicked. Yet here, in this room, he’s his own god. His teachings praised, his touch worshiped.

  We are his broken, ruined saints.

  Disgusted, Roland drives a hand through his hair and turns his back to Sawyer. “I’m done with this shit.”

  Sawyer’s green eyes land on me and widen, imploring me to stop him. I narrow a confused look her way: why should I help her case with Roland—why should I do anything at all for her? She once told me that she would never be with Gage…and look where we are.

  Sawyer used me just like Gage did. I knew I was a pawn in their twisted game…I knew this and still I thought… I almost laugh. How crazy would I look if I just cracked up right here? God, I have half a mind just to follow Roland out of this whole crazy scene.

  One thing stops me: an utterance from earlier tonight; a reminder that change is coming.

  I lift my chin, defiance infusing my bloodstream. I’m not the same weak-willed virgin with a shameful past that first walked through the arches of Brighton Saints. In a matter of months, I’ve experienced more than I have my entire high school career. My skin is thicker, tougher. I’ve learned to compartmentalize.

  Whatever is behind Sawyer’s eyes, her actions here tonight, there’s a reason she’s here. I want that reason.

  I walk hurriedly toward Roland and grasp his forearm, preventing him from descending the staircase. “It’s just sex,” I say.

  He mock laughs, a flash of anger in his dark eyes. “It’s not just sex, Remi. That’s what I’ve been trying to explain to you this whole time. Don’t you get it?”

  I glance at Sawyer, at Gage’s mouth tasting her shoulder, his hand touching her so intimately. He’s high from his conquest. Nothing can stop him or hold him back. He’s taking what he wants from all of us.

  He’s the devil tempting us with forbidden fruit. And still, I’m aroused by him, by the prospect of going up against him. Of making him suffer, even just a little bit, and bringing him to his knees.

  I look into Roland’s eyes, mine pleading with him. “It’s just sex tonight,” I stress. “Do you trust me at all? Do you trust Sawyer?”

  He physically deflates before me. “I have no fucking idea who I trust anymore.”

  With a fortifying breath, I grip the hem of my hoodie and lift it over my head. The cool air of the tower sends gooseflesh over my bare skin, my nipples tightening against my pink bra. I move closer to Roland and take his hands, placing them on my waist.

  “You cared about Lesley,” I whisper close to his ear, letting my body mold against his. “And a very bad thing happened to her. Don’t you want the answer? Even if that answer means you have to go down the rabbit hole to find it?”

  “Yes,” he says simply.

  I swallow hard. Then I grip the hem of Roland’s T-shirt and drag it up, exposing his abs. I let my fingers roam over the warm, chiseled flesh of his abdomen. He’s built differently than Gage; the tattoos that scatter his skin define the muscles, showcasing his tight, defined strength.

  His hands band around my biceps as I lift onto my toes and press my mouth to his, feeling the cool silver ring against my tender lips. This time, I open my eyes and watch Gage as I kiss Roland, a challenge buried in my gaze. I wonder if he’s proud of me, his obedient disciple. Seducing Roland, guiding another member into his fold for him to control.

  I swivel my wrist along Roland’s shoulder blade, the diamond bracelet in clear view. Gage’s ice-blue eyes cut through me. There’s a spark there for just a fraction of a second—a hint of his jealous nature. It may only be contributed to his need to dominate and own, and nothing at all specific to me…but I’ll take it. I’ll use what I can.

  I close my eyes and give in to the action, the kiss becoming urgent. I can feel Roland’s desperation to disappear in the moment. His need to lose himself tugs at my heart, but he needs to be present. I can’t be responsible for taking advantage of a broken boy and using him.

  I unclasp the snap of his jeans, my breath heavy as I say, “Can you want me?”

  His expression is pained. He doesn’t respond.

  I remove my hands from his pants and instead undo my bra. I push the straps off my shoulders and let the garment fall to the floor. His gaze takes me in, watching my hands as I unfasten my own jeans and lower them to my ankles before stepping out.

  “Can you want me?” I ask him again.

  He touches my belly delicately, his fingers probing upward, feeling my body. “Any guy would be a fool not to want you, Remi.”

  But that’s not what I asked. I tug the waist of his jeans, forcing him closer and undoing the snap. Lowering the zipper, I ease my hand beneath his boxers and grab hold of his hard cock. He hisses out a strained breath.

  “That first day,” I say, between strokes, “at the lockers, when you saw me. Did you want to fuck me?”

  His forehead rests against mine, his eyes pinched closed. “Yes,” he admits.

  Because I looked like Lesley. He had to have thought about it at least once. I had no idea at the time that he and Sawyer were together…in some way. Maybe he even wanted to fuck me in spite of her. Doesn’t matter.

  “I want you to fuck me, Roland,” I say, my voice a throaty rasp. I stroke his cock all the way to the base and feel his hips rebound against the action. And his instincts take over.

  There’s no thought of Sawyer or Gage or this tower as Roland drops his head to my breasts. He cups one, taking my nipple into his mouth, his teeth nipping the bud hard. I gasp at the feel, my fingers sinking into his dark hair. His other hand searches for the apex of my thighs. A moment later he has my panties pulled aside and his fingers probing, circling my clit.

  A rush seizes me; my body heated and alive, my head light with the adrenaline. Is this the way Gage feels all the time? Is control this intoxicating?

  As Roland’s finger enters me, I become so wet with the thought of tackling him right here and now and riding him in front of Gage and Sawyer… My eyes snap open. The duo is watching us with bated interest. Sawyer’s expression harbors a layer of mortification, and I can’t lie—I feel a tingle of satisfaction.

  I straddle Roland’s lap, seating myself right up against his cock, where I grind against him and feel the moment his anguish becomes consuming. He’s right there, so close to entering me…

  “Wait…” Roland holds my shoulders as he inhales a deep breath. “We can’t.”

  I undulate my hips, sliding my pussy along his hard shaft. “Why can’t we?”

  His eyes seek mine. “Because we’l
l regret this tomorrow.”

  Will we? My chest feels tight. I feel like I’ve lost something…but I’m not sure what. Lost to Sawyer, or to Gage? Or just lost a piece of myself.

  “God, I want to…” He nuzzles my breasts, grinding his cock up between the soaking slit of my pussy as he mutters a curse. “Fuck. I want nothing more than to bury myself inside you and get lost, to just forget…everything. But that won’t fix this, Remi. Pain for pain will only cause more hurt.”

  I cover my breasts with my arms. I nod once, allowing him to remove me from his lap. My eyes feel swollen and my chest aches, hollow. My skin is raw. I watch him zip up his pants. He grabs his shirt from the dirty floor, tossing a glance Sawyer’s way. Then he leaves the bell tower.

  Sawyer takes a step away from Gage. She looks at me, then back at him. She’s torn; I can feel her desire to chase after Roland, to try to make things right. But how can she? I can’t pretend to understand her reasoning as to why she chose tonight of all nights to be with Gage. The girl I know would never give him that power over her. What changed?

  “If you go…” Gage says, his voice breaking the tense silence. He doesn’t finish his statement, but there’s a clear threat implied.

  Everything she sacrificed to gain that measure of control over Gage… if she walks away now, if she leaves, it will all be for nothing. What deal did they strike?

  Sawyer glares at Gage, making a choice. She snatches her destroyed dress off the floor, grabs her clutch from the railing, and saunters my way. Tucking a loose wisp of hair behind my ear, she says, “He knows something about you. Be careful.”

  My heart plunges to my stomach. I want to demand to know what she’s talking about, but instead, I simply watch her descend the tower steps, my words failing. I feel Gage nearing me from behind, and I raise my defenses, emboldening myself to turn and face him.

  Gage takes me by the wrist. As he lifts my arm, his thumb slides the bracelet aside and he places a tender kiss to my inner wrist. His eyes peek down at me. “You were amazing tonight,” he says, his warm breath whispers across my skin. “You truly impressed me.”