East of Eden

by John Steinbeck

  Adam leaned his elbows on the table. He felt a garrulousness coming on him and he was frightened at the impulse. His voice did not sound like his voice, and his words amazed him.

  "I don't get up here much," he said. "Do you know a place called Kate's?"

  "Jesus! That rum is better than I thought," Mr. Lapierre said, and he went on sternly, "You live on a ranch?"

  "Yes. Got a place near King City. My name's Trask."

  "Glad to meet you. Married?"

  "No. Not now."

  "Widower?"

  "Yes."

  "You go to Jenny's. Let Kate alone. That's not good for you. Jenny's is right next door. You go there and you'll get everything you need."

  "Right next door?"

  "Sure, you go east a block and a half and turn right. Anybody'll tell you where the Line is."

  Adam's tongue was getting thick. "What's the matter with Kate's?"

  "You go to Jenny's," said Mr. Lapierre.

  3

  It was a dirty gusty evening. Castroville Street was deep in sticky mud, and Chinatown was so flooded that its inhabitants had laid planks across the narrow street that separated their hutches. The clouds against the evening sky were the gray of rats, and the air was not damp but dank. I guess the difference is that dampness comes down but dankness rises up out of rot and fermentation. The afternoon wind had dropped away and left the air raw and wounded. It was cold enough to shake out the curtains of rum in Adam's head without restoring his timidity. He walked quickly down the unpaved sidewalks, his eyes on the ground to avoid stepping in puddles. The row was dimly lit by the warning lantern where the railroad crossed the street and by one small carbon-filamented globe that burned on the porch of Jenny's.

  Adam had his instructions. He counted two houses and nearly missed the third, so high and unbridled were the dark bushes in front of it. He looked in through the gateway at the dark porch, slowly opened the gate, and went up the overgrown path. In the half-darkness he could see the sagging dilapidated porch and the shaky steps.

  The paint had long disappeared from the clapboard walls and no work had ever been done on the garden. If it had not been for the vein of light around the edges of the drawn shades he would have passed on, thinking the house deserted. The stair treads seemed to crumple under his weight and the porch planks squealed as he crossed them.

  The front door opened, and he could see a dim figure holding the knob.

  A soft voice said, "Won't you come in?"

  The reception room was dimly lighted by small globes set under rose-colored shades. Adam could feel a thick carpet under his feet. He could see the shine of polished furniture and the gleam of gold picture frames. He got a quick impression of richness and order.

  The soft voice said, "You should have worn a raincoat. Do we know you?"

  "No, you don't," said Adam.

  "Who sent you?"

  "A man at the hotel." Adam peered at the girl before him. She was dressed in black and wore no ornaments. Her face was sharp--pretty and sharp. He tried to think of what animal, what night prowler, she reminded him. It was some secret and predatory animal.

  The girl said, "I'll move nearer to a lamp if you like."

  "No."

  She laughed. "Sit down--over here. You did come here for something, didn't you? If you'll tell me what you want I'll call the proper girl." The low voice had a precise and husky power. And she picked her words as one picks flowers in a mixed garden and took her time choosing.

  She made Adam seem clumsy to himself. He blurted out, "I want to see Kate."

  "Miss Kate is busy now. Does she expect you?"

  "No."

  "I can take care of you, you know."

  "I want to see Kate."

  "Can you tell me what you want to see her about?"

  "No."

  The girl's voice took on the edge of a blade sharpened on a stone. "You can't see her. She's busy. If you don't want a girl or something else, you'd better go away."

  "Well, will you tell her I'm here?"

  "Does she know you?"

  "I don't know." He felt his courage going. This was a remembered cold. "I don't know. But will you tell her that Adam Trask would like to see her? She'll know then whether I know her or not."

  "I see. Well, I'll tell her." She moved silently to a door on the right and opened it. Adam heard a few muffled words and a man looked through the door. The girl left the door open so that Adam would know he was not alone. On one side of the room heavy dark portieres hung over a doorway. The girl parted the deep folds and disappeared. Adam sat back in his chair. Out of the side of his eyes he saw the man's head thrust in and then withdrawn.

  Kate's private room was comfort and efficiency. It did not look at all like the room where Faye had lived. The walls were clad in saffron silk and the drapes were apple green. It was a silken room--deep chairs with silk-upholstered cushions, lamps with silken shades, a broad bed at the far end of the room with a gleaming white satin cover on which were piled gigantic pillows. There was no picture on the wall, no photograph or personal thing of any kind. A dressing table near the bed had no bottle or vial on its ebony top, and its sheen was reflected in triple mirrors. The rug was old and deep and Chinese, an apple-green dragon on saffron. One end of the room was bedroom, the center was social, and the other end was office--filing cabinets of golden oak, a large safe, black with gold lettering, and a rolltop desk with a green-hooded double lamp over it, a swivel chair behind it and a straight chair beside it.

  Kate sat in the swivel chair behind the desk. She was still pretty. Her hair was blond again. Her mouth was little and firm and turned up at the corners as always. But her outlines were not sharp anywhere. Her shoulders had become plump while her hands grew lean and wrinkled. Her cheeks were chubby and the skin under her chin was crepe. Her breasts were still tiny, but a padding of fat protruded her stomach a little. Her hips were slender, but her legs and feet had thickened so that a bulge hung over her low shoes. And through her stockings, faintly, could be seen the wrappings of elastic bandage to support the veins.

  Still, she was pretty and neat. Only her hands had really aged, the palms and fingerpads shining and tight, the backs wrinkled and splotched with brown. She was dressed severely in a dark dress with long sleeves, and the only contrast was billowing white lace at her wrists and throat.

  The work of the years had been subtle. If one had been near by it is probable that no change at all would have been noticed. Kate's cheeks were unlined, her eyes sharp and shallow, her nose delicate, and her lips thin and firm. The scar on her forehead was barely visible. It was covered with a powder tinted to match Kate's skin.

  Kate inspected a sheaf of photographs on her rolltop desk, all the same size, all taken by the same camera and bright with flash powder. And although the characters were different in each picture, there was a dreary similarity about their postures. The faces of the women were never toward the camera.

  Kate arranged the pictures in four piles and slipped each pile into a heavy manila envelope. When the knock came on her door she put the envelopes in a pigeonhole of her desk. "Come in. Oh, come in, Eva. Is he here?"

  The girl came to the desk before she replied. In the increased light her face showed tight and her eyes were shiny. "It's a new one, a stranger. He says he wants to see you."

  "Well, he can't, Eva. You know who's coming."

  "I told him you couldn't see him. He said he thought he knew you."

  "Well, who is he, Eva?"

  "He's a big gangly man, a little bit drunk. He says his name is Adam Trask."

  Although Kate made no movement or sound Eva knew something had struck home. The fingers of Kate's right hand slowly curled around the palm while the left hand crept like a lean cat toward the edge of the desk. Kate sat still as though she held her breath. Eva was jittery. Her mind went to the box in her dresser drawer where her hypodermic needle lay.

  Kate said at last, "Sit over there in that big chair, Eva. Just sit still a
minute." When the girl did not move Kate whipped one word at her. "Sit!" Eva cringed and went to the big chair.

  "Don't pick your nails," said Kate.

  Eva's hands separated, and each one clung to an arm of the chair.

  Kate stared straight ahead at the green glass shades of her desk lamp. Then she moved so suddenly that Eva jumped and her lips quivered. Kate opened the desk drawer and took out a folded paper. "Here! Go to your room and fix yourself up. Don't take it all--no, I won't trust you." Kate tapped the paper and tore it in two; a little white powder spilled before she folded the ends and passed one to Eva. "Now hurry up! When you come downstairs, tell Ralph I want him in the hall close enough to hear the bell but not the voices. Watch him to see he doesn't creep up. If he hears the bell--no, tell him--no, let him do it his own way. After that bring Mr. Adam Trask to me."

  "Will you be all right, Miss Kate?"

  Kate looked at her until she turned away. Kate called after her, "You can have the other half as soon as he goes. Now hurry up."

  After the door had closed Kate opened the right-hand drawer of her desk and took out a revolver with a short barrel. She swung the cylinder sideways and looked at the cartridges, snapped it shut and put it on her desk, and laid a sheet of paper over it. She turned off one of the lights and settled back in her chair. She clasped her hands on the desk in front of her.

  When the knock came on the door she called, "Come in," hardly moving her lips.

  Eva's eyes were wet, and she was relaxed. "Here he is," she said and closed the door behind Adam.

  He glanced quickly about before he saw Kate sitting so quietly behind the desk. He stared at her, and then he moved slowly toward her.

  Her hands unclasped and her right hand moved toward the paper. Her eyes, cold and expressionless, remained on his eyes.

  Adam saw her hair, her scar, her lips, her creping throat, her arms and shoulders and flat breasts. He sighed deeply.

  Kate's hand shook a little. She said, "What do you want?"

  Adam sat down in the straight chair beside the desk. He wanted to shout with relief, but he said, "Nothing now. I just wanted to see you. Sam Hamilton told me you were here."

  The moment he sat down the shake went out of her hand. "Hadn't you heard before?"

  "No," he said. "I hadn't heard. It made me a little crazy at first, but now I'm all right."

  Kate relaxed and her mouth smiled and her little teeth showed, the long canines sharp and white. She said, "You frightened me."

  "Why?"

  "Well, I didn't know what you'd do."

  "Neither did I," said Adam, and he continued to stare at her as though she were not alive.

  "I expected you for a long time, and when you didn't come I guess I forgot you."

  "I didn't forget you," he said. "But now I can."

  "What do you mean?"

  He laughed pleasantly. "Now I see you, I mean. You know, I guess it was Samuel said I'd never seen you, and it's true. I remember your face but I had never seen it. Now I can forget it."

  Her lips closed and straightened and her wide-set eyes narrowed with cruelty. "You think you can?"

  "I know I can."

  She changed her manner. "Maybe you won't have to," she said. "If you feel all right about everything, maybe we could get together."

  "I don't think so," said Adam.

  "You were such a fool," she said. "Like a child. You didn't know what things to do with yourself. I can teach you now. You seem to be a man."

  "You have taught me," he said. "It was a pretty sharp lesson."

  "Would you like a drink?"

  "Yes," he said.

  "I can smell your breath--you've been drinking rum." She got up and went to a cabinet for a bottle and two glasses, and when she turned back she noticed that he was looking at her fattened ankles. Her quick rage did not change the little smile on her lips.

  She carried the bottle to the round table in the middle of the room and filled the two small glasses with rum. "Come, sit over here," she said. "It's more comfortable." As he moved to a big chair she saw that his eyes were on her protruding stomach. She handed him a glass, sat down, and folded her hands across her middle.

  He sat holding his glass, and she said, "Drink it. It's very good rum." He smiled at her, a smile she had never seen. She said, "When Eva told me you were here I thought at first I would have you thrown out."

  "I would have come back," he said. "I had to see you--not that I mistrusted Samuel, but just to prove it to myself."

  "Drink your rum," she said.

  He glanced at her glass.

  "You don't think I'd poison you--" She stopped and was angry that she had said it.

  Smiling, he still gazed at her glass. Her anger came through to her face. She picked up her glass and touched her lips to it. "Liquor makes me sick," she said. "I never drink it. It poisons me." She shut her mouth tight and her sharp teeth bit down on her lower lip.

  Adam continued to smile at her.

  Her rage was rising beyond her control. She tossed the rum down her throat and coughed, and her eyes watered and she wiped her tears away with the back of her hand. "You don't trust me very much," she said.

  "No, I don't." He raised his glass and drank his rum, then got up and filled both glasses.

  "I will not drink any more," she said in panic.

  "You don't have to," Adam said. "I'll just finish this and go along."

  The biting alcohol burned in her throat and she felt the stirring in her that frightened her. "I'm not afraid of you or anyone else," she said, and she drank off her second glass.

  "You haven't any reason to be afraid of me," said Adam. "You can forget me now. But you said you had already." He felt gloriously warm and safe, better than he had for many years. "I came up to Sam Hamilton's funeral," he said. "That was a fine man. I'll miss him. Do you remember, Cathy, he helped you with the twins?"

  In Kate the liquor raged. She fought and the strain of the fight showed on her face.

  "What's the matter?" Adam asked.

  "I told you it poisoned me. I told you it made me sick."

  "I couldn't take the chance," he calmly said. "You shot me once. I don't know what else you've done."

  "What do you mean?"

  "I've heard some scandal," he said. "Just dirty scandal."

  For the moment she had forgotten her will-fight against the cruising alcohol, and now she had lost the battle. The redness was up in her brain and her fear was gone and in its place was cruelty without caution. She snatched the bottle and filled her glass.

  Adam had to get up to pour his own. A feeling completely foreign to him had arisen. He was enjoying what he saw in her. He liked to see her struggling. He felt good about punishing her, but he was also watchful. "Now I must be careful," he told himself. "Don't talk, don't talk."

  He said aloud, "Sam Hamilton has been a good friend to me all the years. I'll miss him."

  She had spilled some rum, and it moistened the corners of her mouth. "I hated him," she said. "I would have killed him if I could."

  "Why? He was kind to us."

  "He looked--he looked into me."

  "Why not? He looked into me too, and he helped me."

  "I hate him," she said. "I'm glad he's dead."

  "Might have been good if I had looked into you," Adam said.

  Her lip curled. "You are a fool," she said. "I don't hate you. You're just a weak fool."

  As her tension built up, a warm calm settled on Adam.

  "Sit there and grin," she cried. "You think you're free, don't you? A few drinks and you think you're a man! I could crook my little finger and you'd come back slobbering, crawling on your knees." Her sense of power was loose and her vixen carefulness abandoned. "I know you," she said. "I know your cowardly heart."

  Adam went on smiling. He tasted his drink, and that reminded her to pour another for herself. The bottle neck chattered against her glass.

  "When I was hurt I needed you," she said. "But you were
slop. And when I didn't need you any more you tried to stop me. Take that ugly smirk off your face."

  "I wonder what it is you hate so much."

  "You wonder, do you?" Her caution was almost entirely gone. "It isn't hatred, it's contempt. When I was a little girl I knew what stupid lying fools they were--my own mother and father pretending goodness. And they weren't good. I knew them. I could make them do whatever I wanted. I could always make people do what I wanted. When I was half-grown I made a man kill himself. He pretended to be good too, and all he wanted was to go to bed with me--a little girl."

  "But you say he killed himself. He must have been very sorry about something."

  "He was a fool," said Kate. "I heard him come to the door and beg. I laughed all night."

  Adam said, "I wouldn't like to think I'd driven anybody out of the world."

  "You're a fool too. I remember how they talked. 'Isn't she a pretty little thing, so sweet, so dainty?' And no one knew me. I made them jump through hoops, and they never knew it."

  Adam drained his glass. He felt remote and inspective. He thought he could see her impulses crawling like ants and could read them. The sense of deep understanding that alcohol sometimes gives was on him. He said, "It doesn't matter whether you liked Sam Hamilton. I found him wise. I remember he said one time that a woman who knows all about men usually knows one part very well and can't conceive the other parts, but that doesn't mean they aren't there."

  "He was a liar and a hypocrite too." Kate spat out her words. "That's what I hate, the liars, and they're all liars. That's what it is. I love to show them up. I love to rub their noses in their own nastiness."

  Adam's brows went up. "Do you mean that in the whole world there's only evil and folly?"

  "That's exactly what I mean."

  "I don't believe it," Adam said quietly.

  "You don't believe it! You don't believe it!" She mimicked him. "Would you like me to prove it?"

  "You can't," he said.

  She jumped up, ran to her desk, and brought the brown envelopes to the table. "Take a look at those," she said.

  "I don't want to."

  "I'll show you anyway." She took out a photograph. "Look there. That's a state senator. He thinks he's going to run for Congress. Look at his fat stomach. He's got bubs like a woman. He likes whips. That streak there--that's a whip mark. Look at the expression on his face! He's got a wife and four kids and he's going to run for Congress. You don't believe! Look at this! This piece of white blubber is a councilman; this big red Swede has a ranch out near Blanco. Look here! This is a professor at Berkeley. Comes all the way down here to have the toilet splashed in his face--professor of philosophy. And look at this! This is a minister of the Gospel, a little brother of Jesus. He used to burn a house down to get what he wanted. We give it to him now another way. See that lighted match under his skinny flank?"