by Amanda Cuff
“Anyway, what are you getting into today?” he asks.
Before I can reply, the doorbell rings.
“Hold that thought,” he says. He takes a long drink of his juice then sets it down before heading toward the front door.
In moments, a feminine “Surprise!” and laughter fills the air and before long, Drake is leading a tall, gorgeous brunette into the room. She stops short when her eyes land on me. Her beautiful smile falls off her face and she’s left looking stricken.
“I know, he’s the size of a horse, huh?” I joke in my typical awkward fashion.
The stunning woman just blinks her eyes at me before swiveling her entire body toward Drake.
“Addison, this is my girlfriend, Rachel. Rachel, this is my friend Addison. She’s staying with me for a while,” he says.
Rachel. Of course.
Her long legs are wrapped in designer jeans and she’s wearing a silky blue top that clings to her like a second skin. Her hair looks freshly blown out and her makeup is perfectly applied. Drake definitely has a type. Tall, thin, and drop dead gorgeous.
I note that Drake is smiling, as if unaware of the discomfort that has settled over the room, but it’s not with the same excitement one might expect from a man whose girlfriend just surprised him with a visit.
Rising from the table with a smile, I reach my right hand out to her as a peace offering. “It’s nice to meet you. I’ve heard a lot about you.”
None of it good, I think, but a lot nonetheless.
Her eyes turn from Drake over to me and then drop down to my hand. She hesitates just long enough for all of us to take notice, then finally reaches out to shake it. “A pleasure,” she says—her eyes telling me it’s anything but. “Unfortunately, I can’t say that I’ve heard anything about you, Allison.”
“It’s Addison,” Drake corrects, his normally jovial eyes narrowing on her.
“Of course,” she says, waving her hand in the air as if she can swipe me from the room.
When he reaches his hand out to her, she turns her body just enough so his hand falls uselessly to his side.
And that’s my cue to leave.
“Uh…I’m going to go take a shower. It was nice to meet you, Rachel.” I try not to walk away too quickly, the woman in me not wanting Rachel to think she’s managed to make me uncomfortable, despite her efforts.
The second my door latches, I hear her shrill voice.
“Who is she?!”
Poor Drake.
She isn’t even trying to be quiet in her quest for answers. I don’t hear his response, but it doesn’t seem to be what she wanted to hear.
“A friend? And yet you’ve never mentioned her?”
I don’t want to eavesdrop, truly, so I try my best to ignore them as I search through my suitcase for an outfit. I want something comfortable, but also eye catching. Even if my situation with Chase is all kinds of screwed up right now, I still want to look good.
“I think I deserve more of an explanation, D. Wait, is she the reason you won’t commit to me?”
I grab my phone and see a text from Olivia, sent earlier this morning.
Olivia: How are you feeling?
I type out a quick “Feeling fine” and add a heart for good measure.
“No, Rach! You’ve got this all wrong. And stop screaming, you know she can hear you!” He’s finally loud enough for me to hear, even if I’m still trying not to listen.
“Really? Because it looks like you guys just spent the night together. You’re wearing gray sweatpants!”
At this point, she’s full on shouting and when Drake laughs in response, I cringe. I don’t even know the woman, but I do know that laughing is just going to tip her special kind of crazy over the breaking point.
I’m not about to leave the room to go take a shower while they’re out there locked in a screaming match. So, I grab for the earbuds in my purse and plug them into my phone, turning on a random playlist. Standing, I stretch my arms high in the air, hoping to work out some of the kinks in my stressed out and sore body; however, instead of relief, a sharp pain shoots through my lower abdomen.
With a grimace, I fall down on the bed and rub at the pain, doubling over at the middle. After a few moments, it fades, but I can still feel a dull ache in its place. I must have gas pain from the pizza last night. Now I feel bad for judging poor Kevin so harshly.
My upbeat music suddenly shuts off as my phone vibrates in my hand and I look down to see Olivia’s contact photo pop up on my screen. I lie back on the bed and press answer.
“Seriously, Addi, you can’t leave a girl hanging for forty-eight hours and follow up with a simple I’m fine,” she says.
“I am fine. I’m sorry I wasn’t able to call yesterday.” I feel pretty terrible for leaving her hanging the night before last. She must have been pretty worried when Chase and Drake called her to try to find me.
“It’s okay, I understand there’s been a lot going on. I appreciated the text at least. Besides, Drake called me last night and told me you were going to be staying with him for a few days.”
“Huh,” is all I say, finding it interesting that he felt the need to call her after our talk last night.
Olivia is quiet, probably trying to figure out the best way to move on from that information without sounding suspicious. “I’m on my way to a meeting for CMF,” she finally says, referring to the Children’s Miracle Foundation.
Every year around Christmas, she puts on the largest fundraising event for the organization throughout the entire United States.
“I’ve got twenty minutes for you to fill me on everything,” she says.
I waste no time giving her a brief rundown of the chaos of the past few days—excluding this morning’s drama between Rachel and Drake, of course. That’s not my business to tell.
“Wow, Addi. I don’t even know how to process all of that,” she says once I’ve finished. “What the hell are you going to do?”
“I have absolutely no freaking clue,” I say honestly.
“Well, you care about Chase, right?”
“I barely know him,” I say honestly and that fact makes me a little sad. Here I am, pregnant with his child, and I feel like I know so little about him. My first time letting go and just living in the moment in years…and it comes back to bite me in the ass.
“Well, you know he’s kind and thoughtful,” she says.
Yes, he’s both of those things.
“You know there’s obviously nothing he wouldn’t do for the people he loves. You know he’s great in bed.”
“Olivia!” I exclaim, cracking up with her. As always, she’s able to take a stressful situation and erase the negative, allowing me to see the humor and beauty in it too. And she’s definitely not wrong about Chase’s skills in the bedroom.
“Sorry, I had to. Anyway, you don’t need to know everything about him to know he’s the father of your child. And from what you’ve said about him so far, he’s probably going to be a damn good one too. Everything else you need to know about him will come. Besides, you didn’t go there just to tell him about the baby and then run back to LA without him, did you?”
I’m quiet, contemplating her question. “I don’t know. I never really planned on staying.”
“Yes, you did, Addi. You might not have realized it, but I don’t think you ever had any intention of coming back home. You don’t belong in this world. Your entire life, you’ve been searching to find your place here, but you’ve always had to compromise in order to do so. And maybe you don’t belong there either, but you’re never going to find that out unless you give it a chance.”
“Damn, when did you get so wise?”
“Um, always. But hey, I just pulled up and I have five minutes to make it inside. Listen, you’re a fucking rock star, Addi! You’ll figure out what’s best for you and that little one.”
“I love you, O.” I don’t know what I did to deserve such an incredible best friend, but I’m so thankful to have
her.
“Love you too, babe. Call me soon, please. I don’t want to have to keep badgering you to give me updates. I mean, I will, but I don’t want to, okay?”
I promise to do a better job at keeping in contact and then hang up.
Pulling out my earbuds, I try to hear if Drake and Rachel are still going at it out in the living room, but it’s quiet. I give it a few more minutes, and when I don’t hear a peep, I get up and grab my clothes and toiletries.
It’s finally time for that shower.
9
Chase
I pull up to Drake’s a few minutes before noon. I have to remind myself to slow my quick steps and take a few deep breaths to calm my wild heart before knocking. But when she opens the door, my whole being calms.
“You look gorgeous,” I say, awestruck. The smile she gives me hits me right in the chest.
Her long hair is pulled back in a braid that falls over one shoulder. She’s wearing a simple cotton T-shirt and white cardigan over jeans and she’s glowing.
I thought it was just a thing people said about pregnant ladies to make them feel better. Even Emily looked like crap for most of her pregnancy with Willow. In fact, it was rare for her to be seen without her head in a toilet bowl.
Picking my jaw up off the ground, I help Addison into the truck then walk around to my side. It’s not a date, but the butterflies in my stomach sure as hell make it feel like one.
“I was thinking about The Blue Rooster for lunch,” I tell her, referring to my parents’ little coffee shop/restaurant combination that has grown into a town staple over the past twenty-five years. It must be a good choice because she gives a wide grin and nods her head.
We listen to music during the few blocks and one stoplight it takes to get to lunch. After ordering and paying—yes, I insist on paying even though my parents own the place—I fill my soda while Addison takes her bottle of water and settles in at a table.
When I turn from the fountain, my eyes connect with Greta Ruthers’. She’s watching my every move with a look that dances between anger and curiosity. I tip my head at her, acknowledging her stare before walking back to join Addison.
“How was staying at Drake’s last night?” I ask when I take the seat opposite her.
“Well, it was nice not having to sleep alone.” She unscrews the cap from her water and doesn’t take her eyes off me as she takes a sip.
“What?!” I shout, pulling a few other sets of eyes our way. I might have even accidentally squeezed my cup a little too hard, causing the lid to pop off and soda to spill out on the table. “I’m going to kill him.”
A grin grows on her face and her eyes light with mischief. “Kevin kept me company until I had to kick him out because of his gas. Man, it’s lethal!”
Her face of disgust followed by her sweet laugh loosens my frown as I blink over at her. Plopping my soda onto the table, I fix the lid before wiping my hand with a napkin. I clear my throat, feeling my cheeks warm at my assumption.
Way to make an ass of yourself, buddy.
“Did you guys have pizza?” I ask.
She only laughs and nods in response.
I stare at the table, trying to build up the courage to ask my next question, but before I can manage to get it together, a sweet voice calls out to me.
“Well, if it isn’t Chase Prescott!”
I turn to see Indira, the manager and only person my mother would ever trust her restaurant with, carrying a tray of food. I rise from the table with a smile, grabbing the tray from her and setting it down.
“Indira, hey!” I greet her, wrapping her in a tight hug.
As one of Emily’s childhood best friends, she was one of mine too. Adult responsibilities have pulled us further apart over the years, but I still love her like a sister.
“I haven’t seen you in weeks! You’re always working when I come by the house. How you been? How’s Em?” she asks, pulling away and giving me and Addison a quick once-over.
Her look isn’t unkind, only curious, but hers aren’t the only searching eyes that have turned our way during this lunch. It won’t be long before Addison starts noticing, too.
“Good, good. I’ve just been working and chasing after Willow. And Em is well.” I don’t need to say much more. Indira checks up on Emily once a week, no matter how busy her life seems to get. In fact, I’d be willing to bet that Emily is more honest with her about how she’s feeling than she is with me. “What about you? My mom says you’ve been kicking some major ass around here.”
She holds her hands up in a shrug and smiles but doesn’t make a move to downplay her achievements.
Indira is a brilliant businesswoman and she knows it. She does the work of at least two around here and it’s only a matter of time before she realizes she’s too good for this small town and leaves Gamble Springs—and The Blue Rooster—behind.
“Business has been good!” she agrees. “Your mom brought Willow in the other day. I seriously can’t believe how big she’s getting.”
“You’re telling me.” I shake my head. “The other day she asked me if she could start shaving.”
Her eyes go wide and I laugh, turning to look down at my lunch date.
“Hey, this is Addison. She’s new to town.” It feels good to speak that out loud—new to town. To pretend that her staying is a real possibility. “Addison, this is Indira. She keeps this lovely place running.”
“Addison,” Indira greets, reaching out to shake her hand. “I think I saw you here the other day with Emily, yeah? What brings you to Gamble Springs?”
“Oh,” Addison replies, her eyes flitting between the two of us. She visibly swallows before continuing. “I’m just visiting.”
“Okay…” Indira drags out.
She’s one of the few people who knows all the intimate details of mine and Emily’s marriage, so when her eyes land on me, I don’t shy away.
“Well, I’ll leave you to it then. Addison, it was great to meet you. I hope I’ll see you around. This town could use some new faces.” She sends me a wink then turns and gets back to work.
With Indira gone and our food arriving, I don’t bother wasting any more time with small talk. I’ve spent too much time dwelling on all we have to figure out and I’m more than ready to get to it.
“How long do you think you’ll be staying at Drake’s?” My eyes don’t leave hers, even when she wiggles under my intense gaze and takes a sip of her water.
“Actually, I wanted to talk to you about that,” she replies and my stomach plummets.
She’s leaving.
“You can’t go,” I say, not holding back a single ounce of feeling in my words.
Her eyes drag away from me and connect with the other diners in the restaurant. Each and every one of them have stared at us a little too long in the short time we’ve been here, and she must have finally noticed it.
“Ignore them,” I tell her, knowing exactly what she’s thinking about their attention.
“How long have they been staring at us?” she whispers.
“Since we walked in.” When she doesn’t reply, I continue. “They’ll find out eventually. You’re not going to be able to hide that bump for much longer.”
“Shh! Chase! Are you crazy? Someone will hear you!” She pauses, taking the time to think through her next thought. “It just doesn’t feel right to come out about this. What will people think?”
Her voice is a grieving whisper and my heart aches for her and this position I’ve put her in. She doesn’t deserve to feel guilty for carrying my child. I want her to feel nothing but elation.
Sighing, I gather our stuff and rise from the table. I walk it over to the trash can and get back to her side quickly. “Come with me,” I tell her, holding my hand out to grab hers.
“Where are we going?” Her gaze flies around the room as I lead her out of the restaurant.
I stare hard at any pair of eyes that spend too long on us.
Fuck anyone who wants to judge me.
/>
“We need to talk and you don’t seem very eager to do that here,” I tell her pointedly.
She nods her head and follows me outside. She looks around the empty sidewalk and takes a deep breath, looking down at our joined hands. She pulls hers out of mine, even though her eyes tell me she wants to get closer.
Her action hurts, but I say nothing as I start to walk, keeping quiet as she trails behind me.
We walk a few blocks in silence and I’m reminded of the cabins, of how easy it was to just be with her. I’ve never been much of a talker, which is something I’ve gotten grief about from others since I was a child. Both of my parents are outgoing, my father especially, so they took my quietness as a personal offense when I was young. It took them years to really get it and for me to see that I didn’t need to pretend to be loud and outgoing just to make others feel better. But with Addison, I’ve never felt the need to explain myself and she’s never pushed me to. She just lets me exist in the moment, without any pretense or expectations.
The street finally ends at the arboretum and I lead her over to the covered pavilion so we can sit down at a picnic table.
“This is beautiful,” she says. Her smile is bright, and it draws my eyes right to her lips.
I want to tell her that the park has nothing on the way she shines. That I’ve never seen anyone more stunning. That I want to take her back to my place and lock her away so she can’t leave me. Not now, not when I need her the most.
“I meant what I said.” My words are hushed, but heartfelt. “I don’t want to tell you what you can and can’t do. I don’t have that right. But I’m really not ready for you to go home.”
She nods her head and looks at me closely. “I’m not ready to leave, but that doesn’t mean I know how long I should stay either.”
“Okay.” I have to force the word out of me, rolling my shoulders back and clearing my throat.
It’s not okay and we both know it, but now isn’t the time to dwell on it.
She picks at her nails, pretending like she’s focused only on her task and not hesitating to say something else. I wait her out, hoping she’ll get around to it eventually.
