The History of Pendennis

by William Makepeace Thackeray

  CHAPTER XXVII. Contains some Ball-practising

  Under some calico draperies in the shady embrasure of a window, ArthurPendennis chose to assume a very gloomy and frowning countenance, andto watch Miss Bell dance her first quadrille with Mr. Pynsent for apartner. That gentleman was as solemn and severe as Englishmen are uponsuch occasions, and walked through the dance as he would have walkedup to his pew in church, without a smile upon his face, or allowing anyoutward circumstance to interfere with his attention to the grave dutyin which he was engaged. But Miss Laura's face was beaming with pleasureand good-nature. The lights and the crowd and music excited her. As shespread out her white robes, and performed her part of the dance, smilingand happy, her brown ringlets flowing back over her fair shoulders fromher honest rosy face, more than one gentleman in the room admired andlooked after her; and Lady Fogey, who had a house in London and gaveherself no small airs of fashion when in the country, asked of LadyRockminster who the young person was, mentioned a reigning beauty inLondon whom, in her ladyship's opinion, Laura was rather like, andpronounced that she would "do."

  Lady Rockminster would have been very much surprised if any protegee ofhers would not "do," and wondered at Lady Fogey's impudence in judgingupon the point at all. She surveyed Laura with majestic glances throughher eyeglass. She was pleased with the girl's artless looks, and gayinnocent manner. Her manner is very good, her ladyship thought. Herarms are rather red, but that is a defect of her youth. Her tone is farbetter than that of the little pert Miss Amory, who is dancing oppositeto her.

  Miss Blanche was, indeed, the vis-a-vis of Miss Laura, and smiled mostkillingly upon her dearest friend, and nodded to her and talked to her,when they met during the quadrille evolutions, and patronised her agreat deal. Her shoulders were the whitest in the whole room: and theywere never easy in her frock for one single instant: nor were her eyes,which rolled about incessantly: nor was her little figure:--it seemed tosay to all the people, "Come and look at me--not at that pink, healthy,bouncing country lass, Miss Bell, who scarcely knew how to dance tillI taught her. This is the true Parisian manner--this is the prettiestlittle foot in the room, and the prettiest little chaussure too. Look atit, Mr. Pynsent. Look at it, Mr. Pendennis, you who are scowling behindthe curtain--I know you are longing to dance with me."

  Laura went on dancing, and keeping an attentive eye upon Mr. Pen inthe embrasure of the window. He did not quit that retirement duringthe first quadrille, nor until the second, when the good-natured LadyClavering beckoned to him to come up to her to the dais or place ofhonour where the dowagers were,--and whither Pen went blushing andexceedingly awkward, as most conceited young fellows are. He performed ahaughty salutation to Lady Rockminster, who hardly acknowledged his bow,and then went and paid his respects to the widow of the late Amory,who was splendid in diamonds, velvet, lace, feathers, and all sorts ofmillinery and goldsmith's ware.

  Young Mr. Fogey, then in the fifth form at Eton, and ardently expectinghis beard and his commission in a dragoon regiment, was the secondpartner who was honoured with Miss Bell's hand. He was rapt inadmiration of that young lady. He thought he had never seen so charminga creature. "I like you much better than the French girl" (for thisyoung gentleman had been dancing with Miss Amory before), he candidlysaid to her. Laura laughed, and looked more good-humoured than ever;and in the midst of her laughter caught a sight of Pen, and continued tolaugh as he, on his side, continued to look absurdly pompous and sulky.The next dance was a waltz, and young Fogey thought, with a sigh, thathe did not know how to waltz, and vowed he would have a master the nextholidays.

  Mr. Pynsent again claimed Miss Bell's hand for this dance; and Penbeheld her, in a fury, twirling round the room, her waist encircled bythe arm of that gentleman. He never used to be angry before when, onsummer evenings, the chairs and tables being removed, and the governesscalled downstairs to play the piano, he and the Chevalier Strong (whowas a splendid performer, and could dance a British hornpipe, a Germanwaltz, or a Spanish fandango, if need were), and the two young ladies,Blanche and Laura, improvised little balls at Clavering Park. Lauraenjoyed this dancing so much, and was so animated, that she evenanimated Mr. Pynsent. Blanche, who could dance beautifully, had anunlucky partner, Captain Broadfoot, of the Dragoons, then stationed atChatteris. For Captain Broadfoot, though devoting himself with greatenergy to the object in view, could not get round in time: and, nothaving the least ear for music, was unaware that his movements were tooslow.

  So, in the waltz as in the quadrille, Miss Blanche saw that her dearfriend Laura had the honours of the dance, and was by no means pleasedwith the latter's success. After a couple of turns with the heavydragoon, she pleaded fatigue, and requested to be led back to her place,near her mamma, to whom Pen was talking; and she asked him why he hadnot asked her to waltz, and had left her for the mercies of that greatodious man in spurs and a red coat?

  "I thought spurs and scarlet were the most fascinating objects in theworld to young ladies," Pen answered. "I never should have dared to putmy black coat in competition with that splendid red jacket."

  "You are very unkind and cruel and sulky and naughty," said Miss Amory,with another shrug of the shoulders. "You had better go away. Yourcousin is looking at us over Mr. Pynsent's shoulder."

  "Will you waltz with me?" said Pen.

  "Not this waltz. I can't, having just sent away that good CaptainBroadfoot. Look at Mr. Pynsent, did you ever see such a creature? ButI will dance the next waltz with you, and the quadrille too. I ampromised, but I will tell Mr. Poole that I had forgotten my engagementto you."

  "Women forget very readily," Pendennis said.

  "But they always come back, and are very repentant and sorry for whatthey've done," Blanche said. "See, here comes the Poker, and dear Lauraleaning on him. How pretty she looks!"

  Laura came up, and put out her hand to Pen, to whom Pynsent made asort of bow, appearing to be not much more graceful than that domesticinstrument to which Miss Amory compared him.

  But Laura's face was full of kindness. "I am so glad to have come, dearPen," she said. "I can speak to you now. How is mamma? The three dancesare over, and I am engaged to you for the next, Pen."

  "I have just engaged myself to Miss Amory," said Pen; and Miss Amorynodded her head, and made her usual little curtsey. "I don't intend togive him up, dearest Laura," she said.

  "Well, then, he'll waltz with me, dear Blanche," said the other. "Won'tyou, Pen?"

  "I promised to waltz with Miss Amory."

  "Provoking!" said Laura, and making a curtsey in her turn she went andplaced herself under the ample wing of Lady Rockminster.

  Pen was delighted with his mischief. The two prettiest girls in the roomwere quarrelling about him. He flattered himself he had punished MissLaura. He leaned in a dandified air, with his elbow over the wall, andtalked to Blanche: he quizzed unmercifully all the men in the room--theheavy dragoons in their tight jackets--the country dandies in theirqueer attire--the strange toilettes of the ladies. One seemed to have abird's nest in her head; another had six pounds of grapes in her hair,besides her false pearls. "It's a coiffure of almonds and raisins," saidPen "and might be served up for dessert." In a word, he was exceedinglysatirical and amusing.

  During the quadrille he carried on this kind of conversation withunflinching bitterness and vivacity, and kept Blanche continuallylaughing, both at his wickedness and jokes, which were good, and alsobecause Laura was again their vis-a-vis, and could see and hear howmerry and confidential they were.

  "Arthur is charming to-night," she whispered to Laura, across CornetPerch's shell-jacket, as Pen was performing cavalier seul beforethem, drawling through that figure with a thumb in the pocket of eachwaistcoat.

  "Who?" said Laura.

  "Arthur," answered Blanche, in French. "Oh, it's such a pretty name!"And now the young ladies went over to Pen's side, and Cornet Perchperformed a pas seul in his turn. He had no waistcoat pocket to put hishands into, and they looked large and swollen as they hun
g before himdepending from the tight arms in the jacket.

  During the interval between the quadrille and the succeeding waltz, Pendid not take any notice of Laura, except to ask her whether her partner,Cornet Perch, was an amusing youth, and whether she liked him so wellas her other partner, Mr. Pynsent. Having planted which two daggers inLaura's gentle bosom, Mr. Pendennis proceeded to rattle on with BlancheAmory, and to make jokes good or bad, but which were always loud. Laurawas at a loss to account for her cousin's sulky behaviour, and ignorantin what she had offended him; however, she was not angry in her turn atPen's splenetic mood, for she was the most good-natured and forgivingof women, and besides, an exhibition of jealousy on a man's part is notalways disagreeable to a lady.

  As Pen would not dance with her, she was glad to take up with the activeChevalier Strong, who was a still better performer than Pen; and beingvery fond of dancing, as every brisk and innocent young girl should be,when the waltz music began she set off, and chose to enjoy herself withall her heart. Captain Broadfoot on this occasion occupied the floorin conjunction with a lady of proportions scarcely inferior to his own;Miss Roundle, a large young woman in a strawberry-ice coloured crapedress, the daughter of the lady with the grapes in her head, whosebunches Pen had admired.

  And now taking his time, and with his fair partner Blanche hanginglovingly on the arm which encircled her, Mr. Arthur Pendennis set outupon his waltzing career, and felt, as he whirled round to the music,that he and Blanche were performing very brilliantly indeed. Very likelyhe looked to see if Miss Bell thought so too; but she did not or wouldnot see him, and was always engaged with her partner Captain Strong. ButPen's triumph was not destined to last long; and it was doomed that poorBlanche was to have yet another discomfiture on that unfortunate night.While she and Pen were whirling round as light and brisk as a couple ofopera-dancers, honest Captain Broadfoot and the lady round whose largewaist he was clinging, were twisting round very leisurely according totheir natures, and indeed were in everybody's way. But they were morein Pendennis's way than in anybody's else, for he and Blanche, whilstexecuting their rapid gyrations, came bolt up against the heavy dragoonand his lady, and with such force that the centre of gravity was lost byall four of the circumvolving bodies; Captain Broadfoot and Miss Roundlewere fairly upset, as was Pen himself, who was less lucky than hispartner Miss Amory, who was only thrown upon a bench against a wall.

  But Pendennis came fairly down upon the floor, sprawling in the generalruin with Broadfoot and Miss Roundle. The Captain, though heavy, wasgood-natured, and was the first to burst out into a loud laugh at hisown misfortune, which nobody therefore heeded. But Miss Amory was savageat her mishap; Miss Roundle placed on her seant, and looking pitifullyround, presented an object which very few people could see withoutlaughing; and Pen was furious when he heard the people giggling abouthim. He was one of those sarcastic young fellows that did not bear alaugh at his own expense, and of all things in the world feared ridiculemost.

  As he got up Laura and Strong were laughing at him; everybody waslaughing; Pynsent and his partner were laughing; and Pen boiled withwrath against the pair, and could have stabbed them both on the spot. Heturned away in a fury from them, and began blundering out apologies toMiss Amory. It was the other couple's fault--the woman in pink had doneit--Pen hoped Miss Amory was not hurt--would she not have the courage totake another turn?

  Miss Amory in a pet said she was very much hurt indeed, and she wouldnot take another turn; and she accepted with great thanks a glass ofwater which a cavalier, who wore a blue ribbon and a three-pointed star,rushed to fetch for her when he had seen the deplorable accident. Shedrank the water, smiled upon the bringer gracefully, and turningher white shoulder at Mr. Pen in the most marked and haughty manner,besought the gentleman with the star to conduct her to her mamma; andshe held out her hand in order to take his arm.

  The man with the star trembled with delight at this mark of her favour;he bowed over her hand, pressed it to his coat fervidly, and lookedround him with triumph.

  It was no other than the happy Mirobolant whom Blanche had selected asan escort. But the truth is, that the young lady had never fairly lookedin the artist's face since he had been employed in her mother's family,and had no idea but it was a foreign nobleman on whose arm she wasleaning. As she went off, Pen forgot his humiliation in his surprise,and cried out, "By Jove, it's the cook!"

  The instant he had uttered the words, he was sorry for having spokenthem--for it was Blanche who had herself invited Mirobolant to escorther, nor could the artist do otherwise than comply with a lady'scommand. Blanche in her flutter did not hear what Arthur said; butMirobolant heard him, and cast a furious glance at him over hisshoulder, which rather amused Mr. Pen. He was in a mischievous and sulkyhumour; wanting perhaps to pick a quarrel with somebody; but the ideaof having insulted a cook, or that such an individual should have anyfeeling of honour at all, did not much enter into the mind of this loftyyoung aristocrat, the apothecary's son.

  It had never entered that poor artist's head, that he as a man was notequal to any other mortal, or that there was anything in his position sodegrading as to prevent him from giving his arm to a lady who askedfor it. He had seen in the fetes in his own country fine ladies, notcertainly demoiselles (but the demoiselle Anglaise he knew was a greatdeal more free than the spinster in France), join in the dance withBlaise or Pierre; and he would have taken Blanche up to LadyClavering, and possibly have asked her to dance too, but he heardPen's exclamation, which struck him as if it had shot him, and cruellyhumiliated and angered him. She did not know what caused him to start,and to grind a Gascon oath between his teeth.

  But Strong, who was acquainted with the poor fellow's state of mind,having had the interesting information from our friend Madame Fribsby,was luckily in the way when wanted, and saying something rapidly inSpanish, which the other understood, the Chevalier begged Miss Amory tocome and take an ice before she went back to Lady Clavering. Upon whichthe unhappy Mirobolant relinquished the arm which he had held for aminute, and with a most profound and piteous bow, fell back. "Don't youknow who it is?" Strong asked of Miss Amory, as he led her away. "It isthe chef Mirobolant."

  "How should I know?" asked Blanche. "He has a croix; he is verydistingue; he has beautiful eyes."

  "The poor fellow is mad for your beaux yeux, I believe," Strong said."He is a very good cook, but he is not quite right in the head."

  "What did you say to him in the unknown tongue?" asked Miss Blanche.

  "He is a Gascon, and comes from the borders of Spain," Strong answered."I told him he would lose his place if he walked with you."

  "Poor Monsieur Mirobolant!" said Blanche.

  "Did you see the look he gave Pendennis?"--Strong asked, enjoying theidea of the mischief--"I think he would like to run little Pen throughwith one of his spits."

  "He is an odious, conceited, clumsy creature, that Mr. Pen," saidBlanche.

  "Broadfoot looked as if he would like to kill him too, so did Pynsent,"Strong said. "What ice will you have--water ice or cream ice?"

  "Water ice. Who is that odd man staring at me--he is decore too."

  "That is my friend Colonel Altamont, a very queer character, in theservice of the Nawaub of Lucknow. Hallo! what's that noise? I'll be backin an instant," said the Chevalier, and sprang out of the room to theballroom, where a scuffle and a noise of high voices was heard.

  The refreshment-room, in which Miss Amory now found herself, was a roomset apart for the purposes of supper, which Mr. Rincer the landlord hadprovided for those who chose to partake, at the rate of five shillingsper head. Also, refreshments of a superior class were here ready for theladies and gentlemen of the county families who came to the ball; butthe commoner sort of persons were kept out of the room by a waiterwho stood at the portal, and who said that was a select room for LadyClavering and Lady Rockminster's parties, and not to be opened tothe public till supper-time, which was not to be until past midnight.Pynsent, who danced with his constituent
s' daughters, took them andtheir mammas in for their refreshment there. Strong, who was manager andmaster of the revels wherever he went, had of course the entree--and theonly person who was now occupying the room was the gentleman with theblack wig and the orders in his button--hole; the officer in the serviceof his Highness the Nawaub of Lucknow.

  This gentleman had established himself very early in the evening in thisapartment, where, saying he was confoundedly thirsty, he called for abottle of champagne. At this order the waiter instantly supposed that hehad to do with a grandee, and the Colonel sate down and began to eat hissupper and absorb his drink, and enter affably into conversation withanybody who entered the room.

  Sir Francis Clavering and Mr. Wagg found him there, when they left theballroom, which they did pretty early--Sir Francis to go and smokea cigar, and look at the people gathered outside the ballroom on theshore, which he declared was much better fun than to remain within; Mr.Wagg to hang on to a Baronet's arm, as he was always pleased to do onthe arm of the greatest man in the company. Colonel Altamont had staredat these gentlemen in so odd a manner, as they passed through the'Select' room, that Clavering made inquiries of the landlord who he was,and hinted a strong opinion that the officer of the Nawaub's service wasdrunk.

  Mr. Pynsent, too, had had the honour of a conversation with the servantof the Indian potentate. It was Pynsent's cue to speak to everybody(which he did, to do him justice, in the most ungracious manner); and hetook the gentleman in the black wig for some constituent, some merchantcaptain, or other outlandish man of the place. Mr. Pynsent, then, cominginto the refreshment-room with a lady, the wife of a constituent, on hisarm, the Colonel asked him if he would try a glass of Sham? Pynsenttook it with great gravity, bowed, tasted the wine, and pronouncedit excellent, and with the utmost politeness retreated before ColonelAltamont. This gravity and decorum routed and surprised the Colonel morethan any other kind of behaviour probably would: he stared after Pynsentstupidly, and pronounced to the landlord over the counter that he wasa rum one. Mr. Rincer blushed, and hardly knew what to say. Mr. Pynsentwas a county Earl's grandson, going to set up as a Parliament man.Colonel Altamont on the other hand, wore orders and diamonds, jingledsovereigns constantly in his pocket, and paid his way like a man; so notknowing what to say, Mr. Rincer said, "Yes, Colonel--yes, ma'am, didyou say tea? Cup a tea for Mr. Jones, Mrs. R.," and so got off thatdiscussion regarding Mr. Pynsent's qualities, into which the Nizam'sofficer appeared inclined to enter.

  In fact, if the truth must be told, Mr. Altamont, having remained atthe buffet almost all night, and employed himself very actively whilstthere, had considerably flushed his brain by drinking, and he was stillgoing on drinking, when Mr. Strong and Miss Amory entered the room.

  When the Chevalier ran out of the apartment, attracted by the noise inthe dancing-room, the Colonel rose from his chair with his little redeyes glowing like coals, and, with rather an unsteady gait advancedtowards Blanche, who was sipping her ice. She was absorbed in absorbingit, for it was very fresh and good; or she was not curious to know whatwas going on in the adjoining room, although the waiters were, who ranafter Chevalier Strong. So that when she looked up from her glass, shebeheld this strange man staring at her out of his little red eyes. "Whowas he? It was quite exciting."

  "And so you're Betsy Amory," said he, after gazing at her. "Betsy Amory,by Jove!"

  "Who--who speaks to me?" said Betsy, alias Blanche.

  But the noise in the ballroom is really becoming so loud, that we mustrush back thither, and see what is the cause of the disturbance.