The ideas my friends kept putting in my head at dinner were still with me. What if I did end up meeting someone amazing? Maybe that was in the cards for me. I was just sappy enough and hopelessly romantic enough to buy that, but it would not be with a player. Such a thing would very quickly get me fired and ruin my reputation and good name. My career would be over. And I’d heard about this sort of thing happening in our field. It was natural in some ways. You tended to become attracted to the people you worked with since you spent so much time with them.
But I couldn’t let this happen with one of the players, no matter how hot some of them most likely were. And besides, I wasn’t actually looking for anything right now. No, romance was not something I was even remotely interested in at the moment. I just wanted to settle in and do a good job while getting familiar with my surroundings.
I eventually laid down after finishing the glass of wine. I was tired. But I was so wired that I wasn’t sure I would sleep at all. Tomorrow I hit the open road heading towards something totally new and hopefully amazing.
But what if it wasn’t? I tried to keep that kind of negativity out of my head, but it kept pecking at me, forcing me to take a listen. I just didn’t know what I was getting myself into, but I supposed that was normal. I was not the only person who felt this way at my age, right? I was joining crop of fresh-faced professionals who had just left school and were moving wherever we had been called to do the work we hoped we wanted to do for the rest of our lives. It was a lot of pressure. And it was scary.
But as I drifted off to sleep I couldn’t help but think about all of the amazing opportunities and the new things I was going to discover about myself as I embarked on this brand-new journey. And if the arrow of Cupid did manage to strike me at some time during this new phase of my life, I would gladly welcome it. I wasn’t expecting much, but I did have dreams of eventually finding the right man and settling down with a family.
I just had no idea who that man might be.
Chapter Three
Jacob
I grabbed a couple beers from the fridge and then sat down at the kitchen table beside Shelley Webster. Shelly was my lab partner in Biology. For some reason, I was being forced to take a science class. I settled on Biology because I had always been a little fascinated with the human body. I was not exactly a great student of science, though to tell you the truth. In fact, I hated this type of stuff. I never really could focus enough on what I was supposed to be learning to actually make it worth my time.
But thankfully Shelley was one of the smartest girls in the class. She was fairly cute also with a sweet, yet very shy personality. I suspected she had a bit of a thing for me, which was probably why she had asked me to be her lab partner in the first place. I was trying to do my share of the work, but so much of it bored me to tears that I found it difficult to stay motivated.
Shelley laughed as I sat down. “What?” I asked.
“You are drinking while we are working?”
“Yeah, it helps me relax and when I relax, I can focus better. Don’t worry, I’m not planning on operating any heavy machinery today. Drink up.”
“I probably shouldn’t,” she said with a wondrous look in her eye. She was sweet.
“Why not?”
“I don’t know. I just feel weird about it when we are supposed to be working.”
“Ok,” I said. “Suit yourself, but that just means I’m going to drink twice as much. Once that beer is out of the fridge, it has to be drunk by somebody.”
She giggled and popped the top of the beer before taking a big swig. “That a girl!” I cheered her on.
She laughed, spilling a little bit on her shirt. This enabled me to notice (and not for the first time either) that Shelley had a nice rack on her. She was packing some beautiful breasts under that button up shirt and sweater vest that she always wore. She was way cuter than she had ever imagined she could be. She was sweet and shy, which actually added to her appeal in some ways.
I was tempted to make a move at some point and see if she was interested back, but I was still with Irene. We’d patched things up since our last fight and the past few days things had seemed a little bit better. Maybe I’d finally succeeded in talking some sense into her. But I still had my reservations.
“Ok, so what part of the report do you need me to do this week?” I asked.
Shelley smiled. “I need you to try to compile all of our data into a printable table for the lab report. And you said you are good with putting together the computer program?”
“Right,” I said. I’d always been pretty good with computers. I sucked at research though. That was going to be Shelley’s thing. It was an odd partnership, but it would work.
“Great,” she replied. “So, you ready for the big game?”
I was a bit knocked off course by her question. “Sure. I think so. I didn’t know you followed the team? Of course, it’s not a big game. It’s just a preseason scrimmage. But I think the team is coming together nicely.”
“Good. Yeah, I follow. I’m a bit of a sports nerd, which is shocking to some people.”
“Well, you don’t seem the type,” I teased. I was aware that I was being mildly insulting, but in the inflection I used and the goofy grin I gave her, she was able to easily see that I was joking.
She hit me playfully on the arm and said, “Not nice.”
“I know. I have a problem with that. I think I got a bad grade in manners as a kid.”
“But yeah, I love watching the team. You are really talented. A lot of people assume that because I’m a science major and kind of nerdy that I can’t be into football. That is totally not the case. I love being a spectator. It’s a huge event, always a good time. I go to the games, drink my beer, eat my hot dogs and nachos, and scream just like everybody else.”
I smiled. “That’s good. You should come out of your shell a little bit more often.”
“I might,” she replied. “I can’t help it if I’m kind of shy.”
“There isn’t anything wrong with that. You don’t have to be the life of the party. Sometimes I love to just relax at home and chill out, too.”
Suddenly, I heard the key in the lock. I felt a bit weird for a second. It was as if I knew instinctively what was going to happen next. This was not going to end well. I could see exactly how all of this would look to Irene. She was going to be super pissed. But, I suddenly didn’t really care.
Irene walked through the door and saw us at the table drinking beer and joking around with each other. I could see the color draining from her face as the rage took over. The anger in her eyes and the actual crack of her mind happened in front of us in about two seconds time. She was beyond livid.
“What the hell is this?” Irene demanded as she slammed the door shut behind her.
“Hey, Irene,” I said with my best jovial voice. I could see this was going to happen and nothing I could do would have made it any better. She was irate as could be over nothing, but her paranoid brain had cooked up the rage enough that she was incapable of reeling it back in at this point.
So, I was just going to let it happen. Because I was done. I knew right then. I had reached my breaking point with this woman. I was not going to stand for this crap anymore. She was out of her mind and she was trying to ruin my life and control every facet of it. No. That was not going to happen. No one was in charge of me.
I did feel bad for the tongue lashing that Shelley was about to receive, though. I was going to maybe have to do some damage control where she was concerned.
I saw the fear in Shelley’s eyes. Poor thing. This was not her fault or her mess. But Irene was going to try to make it that way.
“What the hell is this?” Irene shouted. “Is this where you’ve been the past few hours? I thought you were going to the library?”
“We went to the library and now we are here. This is my lab partner, Shelley Webster.”
Shelley started to say “Hi— “but was cut off by Irene’s screa
ming.
“The hell she is! I know what you are doing! Do you think I’m stupid!”
I couldn’t hold back the laughter. This was ridiculous. I just didn’t care anymore. This woman was out of her mind, completely.
“Shelley, maybe you should leave?” I asked. Shelley was already gathering her things.
“No, you should stay. You little whore! You like wrecking homes?” Irene screamed.
I stood up then and stood in front of Irene to block Shelley from her screams. “That’s enough. There is nothing going on here and you know it. You’re out of your mind. This is done.”
“What? You are the crazy one. You think I’m stupid! You can’t fool me. I know what is going on! I had a feeling you’d be here with this skank!”
Shelley was almost in tears. I gently guided her past Irene and to the door. “This has nothing to do with you. I’m so sorry. Irene has lost it and you just happened to be there. I’m so sorry.”
Shelley nodded as she left. She was speechless. I would have to talk to her later to explain. She was owed that much, I felt.
“How dare you accuse her of that?” I said. “She is innocent in all this. Hell, I’m innocent. I have done nothing wrong. But that is the final straw. Your insane jealousy has just gotten way out of control here. You have to stop acting this way. It’s going to get you in serious trouble.”
“No, you are the one in serious trouble, here!” Irene yelled. I was afraid the neighbors might call the cops if she kept on.
“This is over, now,” I said. “Nothing you say will change my mind. I’m done with this.”
I opened the door for her.
“Oh, you’d better think seriously about what you are doing!” Irene yelled.
“I’m done. No thinking. Just leave. We are done. Get out of my life.”
Irene stood there watching me for several seconds waiting to see if I was bluffing. I wasn’t. She knew it.
“Fine,” she said as she walked out the door. “You will be damn sorry!”
I closed the door, but not quite before she got that last little threat out of her throat.
I was sure I would be sorry. Irene was vengeful and vindictive. I wondered what sort of mayhem she would be cooking up hoping that I would take her back. It would be underhanded. I was sure of that. What had I gotten myself into with that psycho?
I locked the door and sat back down to finish my beer. I’d done it. I was free at last. I had officially ended it with Irene. And I was not looking back. No. There would be no apologies accepted, and there would be no making up. I was completely done with her.
As I sat there thinking about all of the trouble she’d caused me, it caused my mind to boggle a bit. Why had I stayed in it so long? What type of hold did she really have on me? And what was she going to do in retaliation? There was no way she was ever going to accept this lying down. No way.
There was nothing to do now, though. I refused to live in fear to this woman. I would not be pushed around by her. She was a bully. She had tried to bully me and I’d never really let it happen. I think that was the reason she both loved and hated me. She admired that I stood up to her, but she also hated knowing that I would never really be hers, even if we stayed together. She couldn’t control me no matter how much she tried.
I smiled as I moved to the couch and flipped on the television. It was time for a quiet evening of watching sports and drinking beer. I was free and clear of the biggest demon in my life and I was glad to be rid of her. It really did feel like the weight of the world had fallen off my shoulders and I no longer cared what happened to it. I felt light. I felt like my own person again. This dark shadow was no longer hanging over me.
I thought about calling Shelley to explain what had happened, but I figured it was too soon and she might be very shaken up still. Hopefully, Irene left her alone. She was completely innocent. There was no reason for her to be involved. Besides, I was starting to get a bit of a buzz and I didn’t want to say something to Shelley that I couldn’t take back. She was a sweet, cute girl, and I did feel a bit of a connection, but with what had just happened, it was better to not even think about pursuing her. I was in no mood to dive into anything with a woman right now, and if I did pursue something with Shelley, then it would be almost like proving Irene right. And it would make Shelley a target.
Nope, for right now I was going to stay a free agent. I had a career to think about anyway.
The next morning, I woke up early with a mild hangover. I had ended up drinking way more beer than I’d meant to. But the world waited for no man. I had to get out there and make things happen.
I rolled out of bed, grabbed my workout gear, and went for a jog. It was the best way to wake up, especially if you were hungover. Sweating it out was the best method, I’d found. My head was throbbing and I felt nauseous, but as I kicked it up into high gear I found that my mood was lifting and that my body was starting to feel a bit better. I had to keep it rolling here. That was the thing. In life, no matter what you had to keep going.
My thoughts were fairly basic, mostly focused on my headache and stomach upset, but as I lost myself in the music in my head phones pounding loudly in my ears, I began to think about Irene. It felt so weird to be out of that relationship, but was it really that easy? I just said I didn’t want to see her anymore and then it was over. Was that all there was to it? I didn’t think so. I was having trouble wrapping my head around the idea. It was just so simple. And now I felt like I almost didn’t know what to do with myself. I’d been in a relationship for a while, and now I wasn’t. I tried to stop feeling guilty for noticing all the attractive women I saw while jogging, but then I remembered that I could talk to them if I wanted to. I could date again if I chose, or I could just stay single for a bit. I knew that I should have gone with the latter, but my libido has always had more control over me than I’ve ever had over it.
I finished the jog back home and took a hot shower. Then I shaved, downed a protein shake for breakfast, and then headed to my first class of the day. I often wondered why I still had to go to classes. I had my degree pursuit as a backup, but it was a backup I never wanted to use. I had one clear goal in mind for my future, and school really had nothing to do with it. But that was the way the game was played. I had to learn all of these theories about the world so that I could run down the field carrying a football. It was crazy.
But I did it in the cheeriest voice possible. As I arrived at my first class and got settle in, I glanced around at several of the attractive girls in my class waiting to see if any of them noticed me. A few gave me the eye and seemed surprised that I was giving it right back to them.
As I toyed with the idea of flirting with some ladies and maybe even seeing if anything more might happen with this, I couldn’t help but feel in the back of my mind that I wasn’t ready for it. In a sense I felt like I’d been out of a relationship for a while. I guess that is what happens when your mind checks out of the relationship before your body and spirit really do. At that point it is just a romantic endeavor in name only. But I had been in sharp denial about it for so long.
And yet, I’d just ended things the night before. It was surreal. What was I doing? What did I want to do? I was tempted to run back into the wild and have as many anonymous and reckless hookups as I possibly could, but in the end that wouldn’t have been satisfying. I was kind of past the whole numbers game of adding notches to the bed post. Nah, I wanted a real relationship built on love, trust, and mutual respect.
But did I actually want that right now? I didn’t know. For the first time in quite a while I didn’t know what I wanted. Maybe it was better for me to just stay single and figure out what I wanted for a bit. That way when I did meet that special woman, I would be able to focus it all on her because if you don’t know what you want for yourself, you can’t know what you want in a partner.
I drifted through a few classes, had lunch, and eventually made my way to the gym to get in some lifting before our practice star
ted. I resisted looking at my phone any more than I absolutely had to, but eventually the temptation won out during lunch. I was shocked that Irene had actually sent me a text, and while I was surprised by the way she worded her message, I was not really shocked at the venom in her words.
“You son of a bitch! No one throws me away that way and makes a fool of me. THIS ISN’T OVER!”
I ignored the message and blocked her number from my phone. Then I did the same on all of my social media. I’d called the housing department that morning to have them change the locks on my door and I was going to pick up my new keys after practice. As far as I was concerned, Irene was out of my life in most ways.
But when you are on a college campus, you are in an isolated bubble. No one is really out of the reach of anyone else. And with someone as volatile as Irene, this thought made me very nervous.
Chapter Four
Maria
Ugh, this man is the biggest pig I’ve ever met. I’m going to be working with him every day? Really?
Coach Smith was abhorrent, sickening, and blatantly obvious in his thoughts about me from the moment I showed up to his office to introduce myself. The Dean would have escorted me down and made the introduction, but apparently there was some school emergency that demanded his immediate attention. It was strange working on a college campus, even though in my mind I’d prepared myself for it. I still felt odd that I had been on a school campus most of my life and now it would continue into my career. I’d never anticipated this being something that I would actually have to come to terms with.
And I hadn’t anticipated that I would have to ignore the flirty and repugnant glances and cheeky grin of the coach of this team I was now a part of. But I figured that as long as he kept it to those stupid glances, I would just have to ignore things.
“So, are you ready to meet the boys?” Coach Smith asked. He smiled widely as his eyes dropped down to my legs. I was wearing a business skirt that happened to display my legs along with a professional, but I supposed elegant looking blouse. I was trying to look as professional as possible without seeming stuffy and unapproachable given the environment that I was now working in. But I hadn’t expected that a man of the coach’s position would be unable to keep his eyes in his head. I mean, he wasn’t even trying to hide his lust for me.
Only You Page 3
