Untitled

by Jackie Chanel

  We’re not actually shopping. We haven’t done any real shopping yet. We’ve been to every Target, Wal-mart, Best Buy, and Circuit City that we can find in Atlanta and in each store, my sisters have had the same reaction when we spot my CD on the shelves. Their silly screams start a shit storm of epic proportions by fans wanting pictures and autographs.

  Roxy is not thrilled with our impromptu meet and greets.

  She likes to keep things well planned and says “it may be chaotic but at least it’s organized”.

  Forget that. This is fun. I don’t want to sit behind a table signing CDs for fan after fan. I like the interaction. I like when a girl look likes she’s about to faint just because I touched her hand. I love when I see someone that saw me perform at Rabbit’s or Eddie’s and now they’re buying my CD.

  Best of all, I love that I can share this experience with Sara and Delilah.

  My parents declined my invitation to come to Atlanta for my release party. However, they didn’t object to my sisters coming, which is a good sign. Usually Delilah and Sara have to sneak to Atlanta to see me.

  Aiden, will you sign my CD? Yes.

  Aiden, will you a take a picture with me? Yes

  Aiden, can I come to your album release party tonight? Sure.

  Roxy keeps blowing up my phone. I know that there are a lot of things that she would rather have me doing such as interviews and promo gigs, but forget it. Today is my day and damn it, I’m going to enjoy it. I’ve been doing promo for this album for months and I’ll be doing it for many more months. I’m going to enjoy this moment. I’m going to do whatever I want – with my sisters – in the city of Atlanta today.

  ****

  Hours later, we returned to my new apartment. My apartment is great. People said I shouldn’t use my advance money on frivolous purchases, but I’m a musician with a record deal. I have the number one song in the country. It made sense to move me and Sunny into a nicer place, nowhere near the projects.

  As much as I wanted to just hang out for awhile, I can’t. I have a party to get ready for and the girls are almost finished.

  I stared down at the outfit that Sara, Sunny, and Delilah had picked out for me to wear tonight. Black slacks, deep blue and shiny Versace button down shirt, and black Stacy Adams boots.

  What the hell?

  This is not the jeans and t-shirt combo I had planned in my mind.

  “Sara! Dee-Lee! Get in here!”

  There was an excited giggle followed by the clicking of high heels on the hardwood floors as my sisters ran into my room.

  “What’s up?” Sara asked.

  Internally, I groaned. Both of my sisters looked stunning, thanks to Sunny. I really can’t tell them what to wear anymore, but tomorrow, I’ll talk to Sunny about the kinds of dresses that she gives my sisters to wear. I don’t want them showing their boobs in public! In the mean time, there’s the issue of my outfit to discuss.

  “What’s this?” I pointed to the clothes on the bed.

  “Oh come on, Aiden,” Delilah whined. “It’s not that bad! You’re always wearing jeans and t-shirts. At least dress up tonight. Tonight is special.”

  “Yeah, Aiden. It’s just for a few hours,” Sara added.

  “Next thing I know, you two are going to be putting shit in my hair and telling me I need to wear lip gloss.”

  “Well,” Delilah laughed, “you could use a haircut. But you’re a star, Aiden. You should start dressing like one.”

  “I’m not a star yet,” I grinned and picked up the shoes. “I’m not wearing these. I’ll wear the pants and the silly looking shiny shirt but not the shoes.”

  “You can’t wear sneakers!” Delilah wailed.

  “Yes he can,” Sara admonished. “As long as they’re clean.”

  “Fine,” my little sister huffed. “Hurry up and get dressed. Sunny’s going to finish our makeup and then we’ll be ready to go.”

  “This is going to be so much fun,” I heard Delilah giggle excitedly as they made their way down the hallway to Sunny’s room. “Sunny said that Kelly Clarkson, Justin Timberlake, and Nelly all RSVP’d.”

  “I can’t believe my younger brother is a celebrity,” Sara uttered. “This is so unreal.”

  “I know right.”

  When I think about how excited and happy my sisters are for me, I can’t help but think that my parents must be feeling some sort of way. Even though they’re not coming to Atlanta, they did allow my sisters to come. Maybe they’re so embarrassed for doubting me that they can’t make the first move.

  So I’ll make it for them.

  I pulled my cell phone out of my pocket and sat on the bed. My mother answered on the third ring.

  “Hey Mom, it’s Aiden.”

  “Hello,” she said.

  “Um, I just called to say thanks for letting Dee-Lee and Sara come down here for my album release. That means a lot to me,” I told her.

  “You’re welcome, Aiden.”

  “I really wish you and Dad could have come too,” I pressed. “Did you get the CDs I sent?”

  “Yes, thank you.”

  “What do you think?” I asked anxiously.

  “I haven’t listened to it yet,” my mother replied.

  “What? Why not?”

  “Don’t get me wrong, Aiden,” she said, “I think you’re talented, but I’m not a big fan of the kind of music that you sing.”

  “So!” I yelled. “I’m your son! Why wouldn’t you just listen to it? It’s my first album!”

  “What do you want from me, Aiden?” my mother asked wearily.

  “What more do you want from me is the question,” I replied. “I have a record deal. I have the number one song in the country. And I’m about to have the number one album in the country. What more is it going to take?”

  “Aiden, do not yell at me,” my mother stated. “I am still your mother.”

  “Then act like it!”

  “What would you like me to do?” she asked. “You have openly defied my and your father’s wishes for you. You dropped out of college. You lied to us. Your choices aren’t easily forgiven, Aiden. Now you expect me to burst out in a song and dance because you have a record deal? Why?” she questioned.

  “I don’t want this kind of life for you. I don’t want my children to be a part of that trap. But you have given no regard as to what is best for this family. In turn, you have gotten your sisters caught up in this thing you’ve got going on. Delilah’s always on the Internet looking at celebrity websites to see what they’re saying about you. The other day, I caught Sara buying a People magazine. She’s in medical school! She doesn’t need to be reading that garbage. We are not happy with you, Aiden.”

  “Fine,” I yelled. “Don’t be happy for me. Just continue to act like I don’t exist!” I hung up the phone angrily.

  There’s nothing I can do about my parents. They’ll come around. I’m sure of it. I’ll die if they don’t.

  All of a sudden, I didn’t feel like going to a party. My mother had sucked all of the joy out of my night with her harsh cold words.

  We are not happy with you, Aiden.

  Her words echoed in my head as I got dressed and during the entire car ride to The Velvet Room.

  Your choices aren’t easily forgiven.

  What did she mean by that? Are they ever going to accept that I made the right choice for me? Or am I going to be that kid who never talks to his parents once he’s made it?

  “Hey, young blood!” Joey greeted me at the car.

  The Velvet Room is one of Atlanta’s hottest nightclubs and it was already packed with people. The line outside looked like it was a mile long. A loud cheer came from the line of people when someone pointed out that I’d arrived.

  My sisters were oozing excitement as we walked towards the entrance with Joey, Mike, Erica, Eddie, Paulie, and Sunny behind us. This party, from the decorations to the people, is the result of Roxy’s diligence and creative ideas. Everything from the lights in the fountain to
the ice sculpture is a part of her vision for this day. She and Sunny had the time of their lives planning this huge party.

  I stopped to say hello to some of the fans that I met at Target. When security wasn’t looking, Delilah and I unhooked the rope keeping them away and let them walk into the party with us. It’s pretty cocky of me to think that I can get away with doing something like that. Then again, this is my album release party. They are here to party with me anyway. I can do what I want.

  “Aiden!” Roxy shouted when she spotted me. “Thank God! I didn’t think you’d ever get here!”

  “I’m not late,” I pointed out. “I promised to be here by ten.”

  She grabbed my hand and started pulling me away from my friends towards a group of people that she’d been talking to.

  “Who are they?” I directed Roxy’s attention back to the group.

  “The lady in the red dress is one of the vice presidents at Clear Channel. The two guys are senior VPs at Viacom.”

  I don’t know the people but I know their companies. What are they doing here?

  “By the way, you look great,” Roxy added. “Thank God for Sunny.”

  That was how the next couple of hours went by, with Roxy or Dre ushering me from person to person making introductions. As long as I had a drink in my hand I didn’t care. I’m not going to remember most of the people they introduced me to anyway.

  You have given no regard as to what is best for this family.

  There was nothing I could do to get my mother’s irritating and disappointing voice out of my head. The gin and tonic didn’t do it. Neither did the endless stream of Coronas and lime. The party looked like it was a successful event and it looked like people were having a good time.

  Am I the only one at my party not having a good time?

  It appears so.

  Even as I sat in the VIP lounge, drinking with my friends, the grin plastered on my face is just a front. No one else seems to notice. I’ve gotten pretty good at masking my own pain.

  I stood up with my drink in my hand.

  “Where are you headed?” Roxy asked. “There’s someone I want you to meet.”

  “I’ll be right back,” I told her.

  I walked out of the room and instantly it felt like a weight had been lifted from my shoulders. I scanned the packed club. This is where the real fun is. The real people are always in the main room of the club having a good time.

  I located Delilah on the dance floor with a guy who looked too much like a gangster for my liking. I had to stop myself from going over there and breaking up her party. They’re just dancing.

  Sara was at the bar, flirting with the bartender. I decided to join her.

  “What’s up, big sis?” I slid into the barstool next to her. The girls on the other side watched me carefully with immediate recognition.

  “You having fun?”

  “Oh my God, Aiden, this is amazing! We met Justin Timberlake! He is so cute in person!” she squealed. “Plus, we met Usher. Did you know that he bought your CD today? All these people here love you. This one girl actually came up to me and Delilah just to say that your music has changed her life.”

  “Really?” I was shocked. I hadn’t expected that kind of reaction from my first CD.

  “I’m going out to have a smoke,” I said. “Come with me.”

  “And leave Delilah unattended?”

  I saw Paulie exit the VIP lounge and make a beeline for Delilah.

  “She’s in good hands,” I commented. “Let’s go.”

  The cool air was a welcome relief from the hot stuffy club. I didn’t even want a cigarette once I got outside and the cool air filled my lungs. I took a few deep breaths and exhaled loudly. Sara watched me closely.

  “This is kind of overwhelming for you, isn’t it? You didn’t expect things would happen so fast, did you?”

  “In a way, it doesn’t seem fast. I’ve been playing guitar since I was fifteen.”

  “Yeah, but it hasn’t been that long since you moved to Atlanta. It’s fast. And a major change for you.”

  “Why do you say that?”

  Sara laughed. “Come on! You’ve been the reigning king of irresponsibility since you could talk. Now you have a record deal at a label that is depending on you to take them in another direction. You have a band behind you that’s depending on your success so they can be successful. You have people who listen to your music just to get through the day. That’s a lot of people to have depending on you to do the right thing.”

  “I can handle it,” I said confidently.

  “So, what’s that worried look in your eyes about? You’ve had it since we left your apartment. What’s bothering you?”

  I decided to tell her the truth. If I can’t confide in my older sister, who can I talk to?

  “I talked to Mom right before we left.”

  “Oh, Aiden. What did she say?”

  I told her and Sara’s eyes filled with angry tears.

  “I’m so sick of the way they treat you! Mom and Dad need to get over themselves!” Sara yelled.

  “You’ve done nothing wrong. They are the ones who are wrong. They aren’t pissed at our little sister for choosing to forego a full scholarship to USC just so she can try out for the Dallas Cowboy Cheerleaders, so they have no right to be mad at you.”

  “It doesn’t matter that you dropped out of school. You are a successful musician. If Mom and Dad can’t get over that, then fuck them. That’s their issue and they are going to have to deal with. Don’t let their bullshit affect you.”

  She took a deep breath and stared up at the stars.

  “Just remember that Mom and Dad aren’t living the life that they wanted. Mom resents Dad for getting her pregnant in college and having to give up her acting dream. Dad resents Mom for not having an abortion and making him give up his NFL dream. They have their own issues. Don’t let their shit become yours. You gotta love them because they’re our parents, but that’s it.”

  I wrapped my arms around my sister and hugged her tightly. Her words jarred something in me. She’s right. My parents have ruined enough shit for me. I’m not going to let them ruin this.

  Chapter 28

  “Do you want the girls to go back to the Westin or come back to the apartment?” Sunny asked me as we were leaving the club.

  I watched both of my sisters stumble towards the cars that Roxy had waiting for us outside of The Velvet Room. Smart idea.

  Everyone is hammered. Not just a little tipsy, but fall right on your ass as you leave the club drunk. Driving home is not an option. Walking home through downtown Atlanta would have been safer than any of us getting behind the wheel of a car.

  “Let them go back to the hotel,” I slurred. “I didn’t spend all that money on a hotel room so they could sleep on our couch.”

  “Okay, I’ll be back,” Sunny said. She’s drunk but apparently not as bad as the rest of us. She’s still handling business.

  I watched as she told a driver which hotel to take my sisters to and then I started checking out the crowd leaving the club. Watching people leave a nightclub is very fascinating to me. Some are tired and their feet hurt. They just want to get to their cars. Some are really drunk, loud, and still way too excited about being out. It’s fun to watch.

  “Aiden, we love you!” a group of tipsy girls screamed as they passed our car. I let down the window and poked my head out.

  “I love you too!”

  They broke out in hysterical giggles and ran away laughing. A few minutes later, Sunny got into the car and slipped off her three inch stilettos. She sighed as the driver pulled off.

  “That was truly a great party,” she commented. “I can’t believe so many people showed up. How’d you get so many black people to come to your album release party?”

  “I’m sure Rayshawn and Dre called in some favors.”

  “Yup, that’s probably it.” Then Sunny burst out laughing. “Oh my God, you should have seen Roxy’s face when you started pl
aying your guitar and the stampede started. Everyone was trying to get from the back of the club to the main room and she couldn’t figure out why until some girl screamed that you were playing. You’re impromptu performances are a nightmare for her.”

  “I don’t care. What kind of musician would I be if I didn’t play something at my own album release party?”

  “Good luck explaining that logic to Roxy tomorrow.” She paused and sighed again.

  The ride from The Velvet Room to our Buckhead apartment felt like it took forever. The cool air and golden silence did a lot to sober us up. By the time we pulled in front of the building, both of us were sober enough to walk in a straight line to our apartment, even though Sunny was barefoot.

  I adore this apartment! The moment Roxy told me that she had a musician friend who wanted someone to take over his lease; I knew it would be perfect. At night, the view from the balcony is inspiring. There’s a small room that has the same view.

  I set it up as my music room. It’s definitely not a studio but there’s more than enough room for all of my equipment. It’s perfect for writing music. Usually it’s the first place I go when I come into the apartment, besides the kitchen. Tonight is no exception.

  I propped my guitar case against the wall with the rest of them and turned on my computer. As I was sorting through the hundreds of emails I get on a daily basis – the number had tripled after I inadvertently gave out my email address during a radio interview – Sunny stood in the doorway. She’d washed her face and changed into a pair of gym shorts and a tank top.

  “Thought you were going to bed?”

  “I am. I just came in here to say goodnight.”

  When I looked at Sunny, there was something in her eyes that was saying a hell of a lot more than goodnight. She wants something. I don’t know what it is or if she wants something from me or someone else. All I know is that there is a deep longing in her naturally sparkling hazel eyes.

  “Come here,” I said and turned away from the computer. I opened my guitar case and pulled out Dee-Dee. Sunny’s eyes sparkled as she sat at my feet. She knows when I’m going to play her something special.