Her Forgotten Cowboy

by Deb Kastner

  Looking back on it with fresh insight, the idea to stay with Dawn had been a very foolish choice on her part, because from the very first day she was there, Dawn had encouraged a permanent separation from Tanner, had insisted Rebecca was better off without him.

  That had never been Rebecca’s intention.

  When she’d made her vows to Tanner, they had been forever. She just needed some time apart to heal her heart after losing Faith, and then she’d return and work things out with her marriage. It was too overwhelming to do both at once.

  Except that’s not what had happened. She’d made the decision to return to Tanner and had even packed her suitcases. She was on a final run to the store for a few last-minute items when she’d been sideswiped by a drunk driver and had lost her memory. Thank God her son had been cocooned in her womb and had somehow not suffered from the accident.

  But Rebecca had. She’d lost every memory, every moment of time going back to her high school years. She’d been shocked to see her driver’s license listed her as Rebecca Hamilton and not Rebecca Foster.

  Rebecca had to press on Dawn to tell her the whole truth, but at length she’d learned she had a husband, and a life, in Serendipity, Texas, where she’d grown up.

  From that moment on, her focus had been on discovering her past and finding her memories. Yet that wasn’t all that had happened while she explored her old/new world at the ranch.

  She’d made new memories, and a new life, with Tanner and Mackenzie, in a beautiful, happy home. Even better, their son was due any day now, which would be a blessing beyond compare.

  And now Tanner was asking her if she wanted to leave.

  “Why would you ask that?” she whispered, her voice dry and husky. She dropped her eyes, unable to meet his gaze.

  “Because it has to be your choice. I need to hear those words, Rebecca. We’ve been through so much together and I—I need to know you aren’t going to run away again.”

  Was that what he thought? That she’d run away every time things got rough? What about all the time they’d spent together recently, the way their relationship had bloomed from newfound friendship into love—at least on her side.

  Did that count for nothing?

  Did he still not trust her?

  “Please don’t,” she begged, squeezing her eyes shut against the tears flowing down her face. She’d meant to say, Please don’t worry, but her throat had closed around the last word and she hadn’t been able to get it out.

  Tanner dropped his arms to his sides, his hands in fists, and stepped back. “If that’s what you want, Rebecca. I won’t pressure you to make a decision.”

  Her gaze widened.

  “No. No! That’s not what I meant at all.”

  His gaze narrowed. “What, then?”

  “What I meant to say,” she said, focusing on enunciating every word, “is don’t worry. I have all my memories back, and I can assure you I’m not the same woman I was when I separated from you.”

  “No. You’re not.”

  “And you are not the same man. We’ve both suffered, but we’ve also found joy, and we have a lot to look forward to together.”

  “Together?” His voice was so full of hope Rebecca thought her heart might burst. She could no longer wait to tell him what was in her heart.

  She gazed up at him and caressed his cheek. “I love you, Tanner. I never stopped, not even when things were at their worst. There’s nothing more important than what we’ve built together here, as a couple and as a family. I am committed to that, and I am committed to you. Now and forever.”

  “Now and forever,” he echoed, his lips mere inches above hers. She placed her palm on his chest, over his heart, delighting in the way it pounded in rhythm with hers. She closed her eyes, feeling the warmth of his breath on her cheek, and inhaled the outdoor scent that was distinctly Tanner.

  Finally, she was right where she belonged.

  Home.

  Chapter Fourteen

  Tanner kissed her for the longest time, completely immersed in the love he felt for his wife. His beautiful, talented, wonderful wife.

  He reached for both of her hands and squeezed them and then ran his palms up to her shoulders, locking their gazes.

  “This moment is so significant, I feel like I ought to be down on one knee offering you a ring along with my heart.”

  “I already have a ring.”

  “Yes, but you don’t wear it.”

  “Only because my left hand had been in a splint all this time and my fingers were too swollen for me to wear a ring. But that doesn’t mean I don’t carry it with me everywhere I go.”

  She reached up to her neck and revealed a silver chain, on which was looped her engagement solitaire and her marriage band. She released the clasp on the necklace and slid the rings into her palm.

  Tanner’s heart was so large he thought it might explode. “How are your fingers now? Do you think the rings will fit?”

  “There’s one way to find out.” She reached for his hand and carefully transferred the rings from her grasp to his.

  He grinned and dropped to one knee. “I’ve never been one to pass up a good opportunity. Rebecca Constance Foster Hamilton, would you do me the very great honor of consenting to—to continue being my beloved wife? Will you embrace Mackenzie into our family just as you do now and love her as I do? Will you rejoice with me at the birth of our son? Will you be mine now and forever?”

  Rebecca held out her left hand, her eyes glimmering with tears as a smile spread across her face. “I can think of nothing I would like more in this whole wide world.”

  They both gave an audible sigh when the rings slid on easily.

  “Whew. I was a little worried about that,” he admitted, rising to his feet. “What if I had made that huge declaration and then the rings didn’t fit? That would have been rather anticlimactic, don’t you think?”

  She made a funny face—not funny, really, but something between a smile and a wince—and then her gaze widened to epic proportions.

  He raised his eyebrows. “What was that?”

  Rebecca took a deep breath and her smile returned in earnest.

  “If I’m not mistaken, my water just broke.”

  Tanner felt a moment of panic. “Is the baby still moving?”

  “Not as much this morning, but that is normal for right before delivery. I still feel his heel from time to time. Nothing to worry about.”

  But he could tell she was worried, too.

  “It’s only thirty-eight weeks.”

  “That’s considered full-term. Our son is fine. However, we do need to start thinking about calling Dr. Delia and getting to the hospital.”

  “What? Oh. R-right. Call Dr. Delia. Get to the hospital,” he echoed, his voice tight and squeaky.

  Rebecca laughed. Considering she was the one having the baby, Tanner was certainly the more agitated of the two of them. She looked calm and focused.

  “You see if you can get ahold of Dr. Delia,” Rebecca instructed.

  “I’m on it. I have her emergency number. This is definitely an emergency.”

  “No, it’s not. It’s perfectly natural.”

  “I can’t help but—” He swallowed hard.

  “This baby isn’t Faith,” she reminded him quickly. “I’m going to need you to be positive right now. You’re my coach and I’ll need all the support I can get.”

  Tanner squared his shoulders and focused his mind. “Of course. Your suitcase for the hospital is already packed and in the cab of the truck. Go change your clothes and then I’ll meet you there, okay? Don’t forget to keep track of your contractions.”

  Rebecca laughed. “I won’t.”

  Tanner pulled out his cell phone and called Dr. Delia, who promised she’d meet them at the hospital. She had him describe what he’d seen and how ba
d he thought the contractions were.

  “It didn’t look like she was in too much pain,” he said. “She wasn’t doubling over or anything.”

  “I think you may very well have caught her very first contraction. Labor will likely take hours,” Delia assured him. “You have plenty of time to get to the hospital and get Rebecca comfortable with an epidural before her contractions get too painful.”

  That was it. Tanner had a mission. He didn’t want to see Rebecca in pain. They’d decided in their birth plan that she’d have an epidural, so the sooner he could get her to the hospital, the better.

  He jogged into the house, calling frantically for Peggy. She dashed down the stairs, an excited smile on her face.

  “Rebecca,” Tanner said, panting as if he’d run a long distance. Really, it was just panic causing him to hyperventilate. “She’s in labor.”

  “I know. She just talked to me. Take a breath, Tanner. Everything is going to be all right this time.”

  “I know. I’m just—overexcited, I guess.”

  “We all are, honey. Now you just focus on getting your wife to the hospital safely, okay? Jo Spencer is on her way over to watch Mackenzie, so I’ll be along shortly. Just remember what you learned in birthing class. The most important thing you can do is just be there for her, offering as much or as little support as she needs at any given moment.”

  He frowned. “As little?”

  “Exactly. There may be times when she says or does things that could hurt your ego. Don’t let it. This is all about her and delivering a healthy baby.”

  “Right.” Tanner nodded.

  He could do this. He had to do this.

  “But don’t take too much time to get there, huh?” He could still hear Peggy laughing as he went out the front door.

  Rebecca was already waiting in the cab when he got there.

  “Have you been counting your contractions? How many have you had? How long are they? Are they very far apart? I have a notebook and pen you can use to keep track of the times until we get to the hospital.”

  “Well, look at you, Mr. Birth Coach, all organized and everything.”

  He scrubbed a hand through his hair. “Ugh. Don’t tease me. I have to do what I can to feel like I have even just the littlest bit of control here.”

  “I know. Actually, I’ve only had two contractions after the first one. Neither was very long and weren’t really painful. I think we have plenty of time to get to the hospital.”

  “That’s what Dr. Delia said. But buckle up, because this pregnancy transport is going to hit the highway.”

  * * *

  By the time they made it to the hospital an hour later, Rebecca’s contractions were coming in earnest. They were still not completely regular, but they were coming a bit closer together and were definitely more painful.

  Tanner started to turn into the emergency parking but Rebecca stopped him.

  “Stork parking, remember?”

  “I know, but you—”

  “Will be fine for the amount of time it will take us to get up to the maternity ward. This way we can go straight up and bypass the regular hospital triage.”

  Tanner parked as close to the door as possible and raced around the front end of the truck to help Rebecca out before she’d even had the chance to open the passenger-side door. He clutched one of her hands and kept an arm firmly around her waist to support her.

  “I can walk,” she informed him with a chuckle. But right then, a particularly bad contraction hit and she stopped in her tracks, clinging to Tanner’s hand as she breathed through the pain.

  “Right,” Tanner said as soon as the contraction was over. “I’m not leaving your side, and that’s that.”

  She didn’t argue with him again. With great excitement and a little bit of trepidation, they took the elevator to Mercy Medical’s maternity ward. Rebecca was immediately whisked off to triage while Tanner was held back to fill out some papers, even though they’d done most of that in the preview packet.

  Dr. Delia met Tanner at the nurses’ station and they went into the triage unit to find Rebecca all hooked up to wires.

  Tanner turned as white as a sheet and grabbed for Rebecca’s hand.

  “What’s wrong?” he asked, his voice high and tight. He was addressing his question both to Rebecca and Dr. Delia.

  The ladies looked at each other and laughed.

  Tanner’s face went from white to red. “What?”

  “Don’t panic,” Dr. Delia assured him. “This is just a fetal monitor. It’s telling us what your son is doing.” She led him up to a machine that had scribbling needles and was spitting out paper.

  “This looks like a lie-detector test,” Tanner said.

  “It does, kind of, doesn’t it? See these long squiggles? Those are the contractions. When they start to get really close together, we’ll know it’s time to start pushing.”

  The nurses unstrapped Rebecca from all the wires and checked her into a nice, bright-colored room.

  “When does she get the epidural?” Tanner asked anxiously, as Rebecca doubled over with another contraction.

  “The anesthesiologist is on his way. Hang in there.”

  Thankfully, it didn’t take long to get Rebecca settled comfortably in bed with her epidural. The nurse suggested Tanner go get a sandwich from the cafeteria while Rebecca rested, but he refused, saying there was no way he could eat.

  Rebecca’s mom arrived and they took turns standing at her side, wiping her forehead with a cool washcloth. When Tanner wasn’t holding her hand, he was standing guard at the fetal monitor, closely watching the scratch of the needles.

  “Time to go to work,” Dr. Delia finally said. “Are you ready to push?”

  It was hard work, even with the epidural, and it took every bit of Rebecca’s strength and concentration. But she had her loving husband and mother right beside her, offering what comfort and support they could, so she focused and pushed for all she was worth.

  After one last big push, the baby came out. Then...total silence.

  Delia handed the baby over to a nurse and praised Rebecca on a job well-done.

  “He’s a beautiful baby boy,” Delia said.

  “Yes, but—” Rebecca started, her pulse slamming into her temple. No one appeared to be panicking, but she wouldn’t be able to breathe until she heard—

  “Wah! Wah!” Their son protested his introduction into the big, light-filled world.

  Without even so much as swaddling him, the nurse laid him in Rebecca’s arms.

  “He’s a little more than a week early but is fully developed and in perfect shape.”

  Tanner was grinning like the proud daddy he was. Peggy was crying.

  Rebecca just stared at her precious baby. She counted the tiniest fingers and toes she’d ever seen. Then she just gazed into her son’s eyes—the same clear blue as his father’s.

  After a few minutes, the nurse had to take the baby to get cleaned up and weighed. Then he was swaddled and returned to Rebecca’s arms.

  “No,” she said. “Give him to his daddy to hold.”

  The nurse turned to Tanner, who looked as nervous as a mouse in a room full of cats.

  Rebecca smiled encouragingly. “You can do this, sweetheart. Your son wants to meet you.”

  “Speaking of wanting to meet the baby,” Peggy said, “Jo is in the waiting room with Mackenzie.”

  Tanner carefully sat down on a chair, never taking his eyes off the baby.

  “Well, send them in!” Rebecca insisted.

  “We’re just dying to see this little tyke, aren’t we, Mackenzie?” Jo exclaimed as she led the little girl into the room. “I want specifics. How tall is he? How much does he weigh?”

  Delia answered those questions. Eight pounds, six ounces and twenty-two inches long.

&nbs
p; The baby gave a hearty wail and Jo laughed. “Strong lungs, too!”

  Mackenzie had frozen in the middle of the room, staring at the baby and then back at Rebecca.

  “Is that the baby from Auntie ’Becca’s tummy?”

  “He sure is,” Tanner said. “Come on over here, Mackenzie, and meet your baby cousin.”

  The little girl went from frozen to frenzy, excitedly running over to see the baby up close.

  “He’s wrinkly,” she said, reaching out her index finger to touch the baby’s cheek. “But his skin is really soft.”

  “Sit down beside your uncle Tanner and he’ll help you hold your cousin,” Rebecca said gently, her heart warming at how excited the little girl was.

  Her eyes as wide as saucers, Mackenzie sat down next to Tanner and he propped the baby in Mackenzie’s arms, always keeping both hands on the baby himself.

  “What do you think?”

  “We get to keep him? He’ll come home with us?”

  Tanner’s gaze met Rebecca’s.

  Mackenzie had called the ranch her home.

  Rebecca answered her question. “Baby and I have to stay overnight and then we’ll be coming home tomorrow morning. Will you make sure his crib is all ready to go?”

  Mackenzie nodded solemnly.

  “He’s a beautiful baby,” said Jo, “but I do have one question.”

  “What’s that?” Rebecca asked.

  “Does he have a name or are you just going to call him Baby Hamilton for the rest of his life? It’ll do for now, but I’m expecting he probably won’t like it much when he gets to be a teenager.”

  Tanner and Rebecca looked at each other and laughed. Tanner placed the baby in Rebecca’s arms and settled next to her, leaning his hip on the side of the bed.

  “We most certainly do have a name, and we think it’s perfect. Everyone, meet Chase Michael Hamilton.”