Return to the Island: An utterly gripping historical romance

by Hewitt, Kate

  “You might not think me much of one for learning, but I did the farm accounts and I think I’ll be able to manage well enough. I asked a lot of Louisa coming here,” Jed explained stoutly. “It’s time I gave just as much, and the truth is, I want to. It’s time to move on.”

  “But what will happen to the farm? Your father can’t run it on his own?”

  Before Jed spoke, Ellen knew what was coming. “He’s selling up,” Jed said, and a heaviness settled in her heart. Everyone was leaving her beloved island, just when she’d come back. How could it be so? “To the Glenns.”

  “You know they’re buying Jasper Lane?”

  Jed nodded soberly. “Rose told me. They’re going to combine the two properties. It’s what’s happening across all of Canada, and the States, as well. Bigger farms, fewer farmers. It’s the way of things now, for better or worse. We’ve made our peace with it.”

  And so she would have to, as well. “And Lucas…?” Ellen asked after a moment, doing her best to keep her voice neutral. “He doesn’t want to come back here, I suppose, and run things?”

  “Lucas belongs in Toronto,” Jed said firmly. “He always has. Although we’ve appreciated his help.”

  Ellen’s startled gaze flew to his. “His help…?”

  “Lucas has been helping with the farm,” Jed explained gruffly, not quite looking at her. “Sending half his paycheck home, at least, sometimes more. We couldn’t have managed without it, I’m ashamed to say, even though I’m grateful. Powerfully grateful.”

  Ellen fell silent at this news. In the past, she’d as good as accused Lucas of shirking his duty to his family’s farm. It shamed her to realize he hadn’t been. Of course he hadn’t been. If she knew him at all, she should have known that, absolutely. In that moment, she realized something else; Lucas had to have been the anonymous donor who paid for Peter’s treatment. How could she have ever doubted him for so much as a second? How could she have not realized, when he had always been so unfailingly generous with his time, his attention, his care?

  “So he will stay in Toronto, then?” she asked.

  “As far as I know. He’s coming back to the island, though, to see Louisa and help settle things with the farm. In fact, he should be here by tomorrow.”

  “Tomorrow,” Ellen repeated slowly. “It will be good to see him.”

  Louisa’s eyes narrowed in an all too familiar way, as a small smile curved her lips. “Will it?” she said, and Ellen chose not to reply.

  Chapter Twenty-Seven

  Ellen walked slowly back to Jasper Lane, savoring the autumnal sunshine even as her heart felt both heavy and light, dragging from the sorrowful weight of all the news she’d heard, and at the same time cut from its moorings, free at last, able to soar… if only she could finally dare to spread her wings.

  What would her life look like without her beloved island in it? Where would she go? She had come back to the island—to the place she felt she belonged—thinking she would stay here, or at least hoping she would, or perhaps just hoping she would know what her next steps should be.

  She knew now they couldn’t be on the island, and even as she mourned that loss, she accepted its rightness. Amherst Island had been her safe harbor when she’d needed it, but she had always known, on some level, that she couldn’t stay there forever. So where would she go?

  Return to Glasgow, where her little house waited for her, along with her friends Ruby and Dougie? She could make a life for herself there, perhaps offer private art lessons, earn enough to get by if she managed the dwindling remains of her savings. Perhaps she’d still be able to take up the offered position at the Glasgow School of Art. Or she could move to New York, and take up the life there that seemed so dazzling and new. She already had friends—the Framptons, Will… would he stay in New York, if she returned? And yet she knew she didn’t want him to. Just as she knew New York was not the place for her, despite its allure, and neither was Glasgow.

  Neither place gave her that soul-deep satisfaction she craved, the true and utter sense of belonging she’d once thought the island gave her but now knew would not, and never could.

  So where was it? More importantly, who was it? She’d begun to realize, if only dimly, that belonging didn’t have to be a place, but could be a person. The only person.

  Ellen paused by the pond where she’d spent so many happy childhood days, playing and sketching. The trees drooping over it were yellow-leaved, and a few had already fallen onto the surface of the pond, which was murky after the summer’s rains. The season was turning once again, as those winds of change blew without mercy or warning. Where would she go? Where would she finally stay? She had hope at last, the weariness of war shed for something newer and deeper—if only she could dare. Dream.

  “Hello, Ellen.”

  Ellen stilled and then slowly turned as a wonderfully familiar figure emerged from the woods on the far side of the pond that served as the boundary between the Lyman and McCafferty farms, almost as if she’d conjured him from her own imagination, the secret longings of her own heart.

  “Lucas.” His name sprang to her lips, surprise and delight audible in her voice as he walked towards her. “Jed and Louisa said you weren’t coming until tomorrow.”

  “I decided to come a day early. There’s so much work to be done. I stopped by Jasper Lane, and Rose told me you’d gone to see Jed and Louisa. I thought I’d find you here. How are they?”

  “They’re doing well. They’re going to move to Seaton. But you must know that already—”

  “Yes, Jed told me, when he wrote. I’m glad for them both.” He crossed the clearing to stand in front of her, his hat in his hands, an easy smile on his dear, familiar face. How well she knew it—the glinting blue eyes, the sandy hair, the whimsical smile, the wry yet serious look, the affection she’d taken for granted and yet depended on. Utterly.

  Lucas had been her best friend and stalwart companion for so much of her life. It was in this very spot where she’d first shown him her sketches, and he’d encouraged her to follow her dreams. The trouble was, she’d always been so scared to, just as he’d said.

  And now?

  “You know about Jasper Lane?” she asked and Lucas nodded. “Rose wrote Peter, who told me.”

  “And you must know about your place as well…?”

  “Yes, I’m helping with the contract of sale.” Lucas smiled sadly. “Dad was ready to leave, in the end.”

  “Jed told me that you’d been helping with things,” Ellen said stiltedly. “Sending money. Why didn’t you tell me?”

  Lucas smiled ruefully. “It felt like boasting, to say as much, and the truth was, Ellen, I wanted you to believe the best of me. I always have.”

  “Oh, Lucas…” She bit her lip. “I should have done. I realized that as soon as Jed told me. I should have known all along… and Peter, as well. You paid for his treatment, didn’t you?”

  He nodded, and she shook her head in regret.

  “I’m sorry for doubting you, even for a moment. I never should have.”

  He shook his head, a smile still in his eyes. “It’s in the past now. We don’t need to revisit old hurts.”

  But that was exactly what Ellen wanted to do… and bind them up again. The certainty of her conviction left her nearly breathless, and yet also wanting to smile, to laugh, with the sureness of her own feelings. After years of pretending otherwise, of denying the truth of her own heart, she finally realized what she should have known all along. She loved him. Perhaps she’d always loved him. But what if Lucas didn’t feel the same way? After all these years…

  Lucas cocked his head, his gaze sweeping over her. “Will you return to New York, to take up the position at the girls’ school?”

  “You know about everything, it seems!” Ellen returned with a smile.

  “Rose mentioned you’d been offered a position teaching art. It sounds perfect. I’m so happy for you, Ellen.”

  Ellen nodded, her mouth drying. Her heart hammering.
She knew Lucas meant what he said, and yet… Now was the time to speak. To dare. So much of her life had been dictated by fear—fear of failure, of being hurt, of being alone. She’d hung back, quiet and scared, the determined wallflower, just as Will had said, rather than risk her heart—whether it had been as a tangle-haired orphan in Vermont, or a shy, dreaming artist in Scotland. But now, finally, she wanted to risk her heart, risk everything, in the biggest and best way possible. She needed to… for her sake, as well as for Lucas’s.

  “I’ve thought about taking the position in New York,” she admitted, her voice little more than a thready rasp. “It does seem perfect, and in truth I didn’t know why I was resisting so much. I decided to return to the island. I felt I could think more clearly here.”

  “And can you?”

  “Yes—of course, it’s helped that Rose has told me about selling Jasper Lane. That makes thing easier, in a way.” As much as she wanted to declare her heart, fear kept her skirting the issue, even now.

  “So you will take the position.” For a second, Lucas’s warm smile faltered, the sparkle in his eyes dimming, and that was enough to embolden Ellen further.

  “No, I won’t. That is, I don’t want to.”

  Lucas frowned. “Why not?”

  “Because there’s one thing holding me back.” Ellen’s heart was hammering, a tremble in her voice as she looked at him. “Or rather, I should say, one person.”

  “One person?” Lucas’s gaze swept her face, looking for answers, even as he did his best to keep his expression neutral. “Who might that be?”

  “You.”

  The look of astonishment on his face was almost laughable, except she was so very nervous. Risking things—this much—was hard.

  “Ellen, I’ve always encouraged you to follow your—”

  “No, I don’t mean that.” Ellen took a deep breath, and then a step closer to him. “Although maybe I do. I am following my dreams, Lucas, and my dreams are here with you. Do you remember, all those years ago, back at Queen’s, when you asked me if I could… care for you… in time?”

  Lucas went completely still, his expression of astonishment turning to one of wary, focused alertness. “Yes,” he said quietly. “I remember it very well.”

  “And then, during the war… when you saw me at Royaumont… you said you still cared for me then.”

  “I did.”

  “I’ve come to realize…” Ellen paused, her face fiery, her heart beating like a drum, “over the last few weeks and months… that I do care for you. That I’ve always cared for you, even if I didn’t realize it. Even if I took your feelings for granted, while I didn’t recognize my own.”

  “But I thought…” He lapsed into silence, and Ellen knew what he was thinking. Jed.

  She shook her head. “I’ve been so tangled in my own thoughts,” she confessed. “And I didn’t know my own heart. But who was it who was always there for me, Lucas? Who did I share my drawings, my secret self with, and who was always patient and kind and listening?”

  “Yes, but…” Lucas swallowed. “Those are the actions of a friend, Ellen, and that’s what I’ve been to you. You told me so yourself. Just a friend.” A note of old bitterness crept into his voice and he shook his head as if to dismiss it, offering her a rueful smile of apology.

  “I was young and childish when I said as much,” Ellen told him. “I confused love with infatuation, I can admit that. I’m old and wise enough, I hope, to know the difference now.” She licked dry lips as she continued with painful uncertainty, knowing her own heart but not that of the man she knew she loved. “That is, if you still feel the same way after all this time. I wouldn’t blame you if you didn’t…”

  “The same way?” Lucas repeated in disbelief, and Ellen looked at him, full of doubt. Then he let out a laugh of pure joy, ringing clearly as a bell through the still wood. “Ellen Copley, I’ve never changed, not even for a moment. Not for a second. I didn’t want to distress you with that knowledge, so I never said anything, but it’s the truth. I love you. I’ve always loved you, from the first moment I saw you, I think. It’s only grown deeper with time, and I know I’ll never stop.”

  “And I love you,” Ellen said simply, meaning it with every fiber of her being, every ounce of her heart. She loved him. She’d always loved him, even if she hadn’t realized it. Even if she hadn’t let herself realize it. Saying it out loud was wonderfully freeing, bringing both joy and wonder.

  Lucas let out another laugh of incredulous happiness as he shook his head in amazement. “I never thought that this would happen. I never dreamed that you would care for me the way I care for you…”

  “You’ve been such a good friend to me, Lucas. I feel I don’t deserve your love, after—”

  “Don’t say it,” Lucas hushed her, his face suffused with tenderness. “I’ve been a good friend, and now I have the privilege to be so much more.” Gently, he took her in his arms, pausing to look down into her eyes as Ellen tilted her face upward, offering her heart, her whole self.

  As Lucas softly kissed her, Ellen knew that this, not her beloved island, not dear Jasper Lane, was home. Finally, sweetly, she’d found the place where she would always belong, always be understood and accepted, and it was far more wonderful than she could have ever imagined. Whatever the future held—Toronto, New York, or an even more distant and unknown horizon, she knew she would face it with Lucas, the man she loved, the man she’d always loved, even if her stubborn and contrary heart had insisted otherwise. She was finally home, and it was the sweetest place on earth. Home here, with Lucas, as hand in hand they walked back to Jasper Lane.

  * * *

  If you loved the Amherst Island series, don’t miss Into the Darkest Day—a novel about courage, friendship and heartbreak, set during World War Two.

  Buy now!

  Into the Darkest Day

  Get it here!

  She had to step outside and hold the paper up to the moonlight to read it, but when she was able to make out the words, her heart felt as if it would drop right out of her chest. Because the message was in German.

  1944, London:

  When Lily meets enigmatic GI Matthew in war-torn London, she doesn’t expect to fall in love. While her sister starts a reckless affair with another GI, Lily tries to hide her growing feelings for Matthew.

  But Matthew has a devastating secret. One that could change their lives forever.

  Present day, America:

  Abby lives a quiet life on an apple farm in Wisconsin. Tormented by survivor’s guilt after the tragic deaths of her mother and brother, Abby leaves the orchards as little as possible, keeping her life small, peaceful and safe… Until she is contacted by Englishman Simon Elliot, who arrives nursing a heartbreak of his own, and bearing a World War Two medal that he claims belonged to Abby’s grandfather.

  Together they begin to piece together the heartbreaking story of their relatives’ war. But as the story brings Abby and Simon closer—tentatively beginning to lean on one another to heal—they uncover a dark secret from the past.

  And like Lily and Matthew nearly eighty years before them, it will make Abby and Simon question whether you can ever truly trust someone, even when they have your heart…

  A heartbreakingly powerful, epic love story about courage, friendship and broken trusts, Into the Darkest Day is an unforgettable story perfect for fans of Nora Roberts, Kristin Hannah and The Notebook.

  Buy now!

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  Books by Kate Hewitt

  Amherst Island Trilogy

  The Orphan’s Island

  Dreams of the Island

  Return to the Island

  The Far Horizons Trilogy

  The Heart Goes On

  Her Rebel Heart

  This Fragile Heart<
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  Standalone Novels

  The Girl From Berlin

  When You Were Mine

  Into the Darkest Day

  A Hope for Emily

  No Time to Say Goodbye

  Not My Daughter

  The Secrets We Keep

  A Mother’s Goodbye

  This Fragile Life

  When He Fell

  Rainy Day Sisters

  Now and Then Friends

  A Mother like Mine

  Writing as Katharine Swartz

  The Vicar's Wife

  The Lost Garden

  The Second Bride

  The Other Side of The Bridge

  AVAILABLE IN AUDIO

  When You Were Mine (Available in the UK and the US)

  Into the Darkest Day (Available in the UK and the US)

  A Hope for Emily (Available in the UK and the US)

  No Time to Say Goodbye (Available in the UK and the US)

  Not My Daughter (Available in the UK and the US)

  The Secrets We Keep (Available in the UK and the US)

  A Mother’s Goodbye (Available in the UK and the US)

  The Far Horizons Trilogy

  The Heart Goes On (Available in the UK and the US)

  Her Rebel Heart (Available in the UK and the US)

  This Fragile Heart (Available in the UK and the US)

  A Letter from Kate