Liam (The Murphy Boys Series Book 4)

by Holly C. Webb

  “I know,” Liam replied. “Good night baby brother.”

  “Good night, Jackass,” Dylan laughed before he hung up the phone.

  Liam stopped a passing cab and was soon heading for home.

  Forty minutes later, Liam was climbing out of his shower, before heading back to his bedroom. He felt beyond tired. Once he was dried, he sat down on the edge of his bed, and stared into space for a few moments, as yet again his mind was filled with thoughts of Lexi.

  He missed her. He had every day since she walked out of his life. But seeing her that day made him realise just how much he truly longed for her; how much his life was empty without her.

  Reaching out to his nightstand, he pulled opened the top drawer, pulling out the picture frame from inside. It was a picture of him and Lexi. It had been taken about a month before she walked out of his life. It was taken on one of their trips to the beach. Lexi loved to surf, and they often took trips up the coast, where they would spend the day surfing. Lexi would also take her camera with her and would often get lost in her lens. She had such an extraordinary talent. Her photographs were breath-taking.

  He had followed her career over the five years since she left. She had become a big name in New York, even having her own exhibit several times.

  Liam had considered going to them a few times. Once, he even travelled to New York. But in the end, he couldn’t face going to the exhibit and seeing Lexi. He didn’t want to cause her another moment’s pain, so he headed back to San Francisco, trying his hardest to push her from his thoughts.

  Liam stared at the photo for the longest time, and he replayed his meeting with her that day, over and over.

  He wished he had said so much more to her. He should have told her that he missed her, that he still loved her.

  He closed his eyes, knowing he had let his last chance slip from his hands.

  Setting the photo back into the drawer, Liam stood up, pulling back the covers on his bed, then climbed underneath. Reaching over, he switched off the light on his nightstand.

  Staring into the darkness of his room, he sighed to himself, knowing that there was nothing he could do to shake Lexi from his mind. He remembered how it felt to have her in his arms once more. Even if it was just for a few moments.

  It was everything to Liam. He drifted off to sleep with that memory in his head. His heart feeling a strange mix of comfort and heartbreak, all at once.

  Chapter 5

  “I don’t know why we couldn’t drive my car,” Liam sighed as he pulled into the parking space outside the hospital. “My baby is so much better than this oversized bucket of bolts.”

  “Your baby needs to be turned into scrap metal,” Nell sighed, as she slipped off her seatbelt. “Besides, neither I nor your father were squeezing into the back seat of that tin can.”

  “Where’s your sense of adventure, Mom,” Liam laughed, giving his mother a warm smile.

  “It’s good to see you smile, Sweetheart,” Nell said, giving Liam a look that said she was worried about him. “I know these last few days have been hard, they have been hard on all of us.”

  “They have,” Liam sighed, then giving his mom a warm smile. “It’s hard seeing Dad so sick.”

  “I know,” Nell replied, watching Liam closely. “But for you it was more than that. Is there something you would like to talk about?”

  “Me?” Liam asked, knowing there was only so much he could hide from his mother. “No, nothing.”

  “Liam,” Nell sighed, giving him a knowing look. “You forget I know all my boys better than they know themselves. I know when you’re happy, when you’re sad, and when you’re lying.”

  “It’s nothing that you need worry about, Mom,” Liam quickly corrected himself, knowing there was no point in flat out denying there was something wrong. “Honestly. Right now, the only thing I care about is getting Dad and taking him home. That’s what today is about.”

  “But you know I’m here if you need to talk,” Nell said, reaching over and softly touching his arm. “And there is nothing that you can’t tell me.”

  “I know, Mom,” Liam sighed, giving her a smile. “Thank you. I promise, if I need to talk, I will come find you.”

  “Good,” Nell replied, patting him on the arm. “Now, let’s go bring your father home, before he escapes on his own.”

  Liam laughed as he pushed open the door of his father’s Mercedes and climbed out. He took a deep breath before he hurried around to open the door for his mother.

  It was five days since he had bumped into Lexi in the hospital, and as much as he hated to admit it, she was the only thing he could think about since. Every time he arrived at the hospital, he found he would look for her everywhere. Every corridor he walked along, every time the elevator doors opened, she was the first thing he would look for. He knew it was stupid, the chances of just bumping into her again were very unlikely. Still, she was all he thought about, all he wanted to see.

  “Oh, no matter what your dad says,” Nell said as they waited for the elevator. “There is no way he is driving home.”

  “Got it,” Liam replied with a laugh, knowing that was the first thing his father would want to do. He knew that Sean hated being sick as much as Liam hated to see him that way.

  Sean was a proud, strong man, so being sick to him was almost like he was failing in his duties to his family. It was his job to take care of them, not the other way around.

  The elevator pinged and Liam looked up as the doors parted. He moved to step onto the elevator, but froze the moment he spotted Lexi standing inside it.

  “Oh my goodness!” Nell exclaimed, as she looked up too and spotted Lexi standing in front of her. “Lexi, Sweetheart.”

  Lexi smiled as she stepped off the elevator, as Nell instinctively held out her arms and wrapped them around her tightly.

  “It’s so good to see you, my darling girl,” Nell whispered, holding her longer than she should have. Liam knew that his mother always had a soft spot for Lexi, just like he knew she was devastated when they broke up. “It’s been far too long. How have you been? How’s your parents?”

  “I’m good,” Lexi replied, as Nell finally released her from her embrace. “Mom and Dad are good too. Enjoying their retirement.”

  “They retired?” Nell asked, and it made Liam smile that, even after all these years, his mom and Lexi picked up exactly how they always were. It was like the last five years hadn’t happened.

  “Yeah,” Lexi replied with a bright smile. “”Dad reached thirty years with the fire department last summer and retired. He and Mom sold the house, and moved across the country to a beach house on the Cape.”

  “Please give them my love when you speak to them,” Nell said, glancing at Liam, as her face flushed with embarrassment as if she suddenly realised what was actually happening. “I think I will go find Sean. Leave you two to talk. Lexi, as always it was so lovely to see you. You should come for dinner, soon.”

  “I’d love to,” Lexi replied, surprising Liam with her reply, even though he knew in his heart she was mostly likely just being polite. “It was lovely to see you again, Nell.”

  Nell smiled, before she pressed the call button for the elevator. The doors opened almost immediately. With one last smile, Nell stepped into the elevator, leaving Liam alone with Lexi once more.

  “Your mom is still as sweet as ever,” Lexi said, finally allowing her eyes to meet Liam’s. “I always loved her.”

  “She loves you, too,” Liam said, giving Lexi a nervous smile. “She misses you. We all do.”

  “I miss everyone, too,” Lexi replied, her face flushing with embarrassment.

  “Including me?” Liam asked, unable to resist the question.

  “Liam, please don’t,” Lexi sighed, looking a little less comfortable now. “I… I should go.”

  She moved to step around him to make her escape, but Liam quickly moved, stopping her from leaving.

  “Please don’t,” Liam quickly said, giving her a
pleading look. “I’m sorry. I know what I did to us, what I did to you. I know you’ve moved on. I just… I miss talking to my best friend.”

  She stared up at him for a moment, as Liam held his breath. He knew he shouldn’t have said what he did. He was an idiot, he knew that much. He just wasn’t ready to let her walk away again. Not this time.

  “I miss talking to you, too,” Lexi replied finally, surprising him with her answer.

  “So, we can be friends?” Liam asked, giving her a hopeful smile.

  “Friends?” She tested the word, giving him a half smile. “I guess we can.”

  “Good,” he replied as his smile widened. “Thank you.”

  She stared at him once more. Liam could see there was more she wanted to say, but she didn’t. Instead she just smiled too.

  They both stood there for what felt like forever in awkward silence, neither knowing what to say next.

  “So, Eric seems like a nice guy,” Liam said finally, knowing that there was no point in avoiding the one thing that they both knew was hanging between them.

  “He is,” Lexi said, her face flushing with embarrassment, suddenly no longer allowing her eyes to meet Liam’s.

  “Have you been dating long?” Liam asked, knowing no matter what her answer was, it was not going to make him feel any better.

  “Liam, don’t,” she sighed, giving him a look that threw him a little.

  “I’m asking as your friend,” Liam assured her, even though he knew that wasn’t strictly true. “It’s what friends do, right?” She stared at him for a moment, looking far from convinced.

  “Almost a year” she shrugged, still not meeting his gaze. “I met him while he was working in New York. When he got the job here, he asked me to come with him. I missed San Francisco, so I said yes.”

  “I see,” Liam replied, trying his hardest not to appear as crushed as he was feeling. They were together a year. She moved across the country to be with this guy. That meant it was serious. “So you’ve been back…”

  “Almost a month,” she replied before he finished his question.

  “I see,” Liam said, as once more a silence fell between them. He stared at her for what seemed like an eternity. He was still stunned that she was actually standing there. Liam had believed deep inside his heart that he would never see her again. Still, here she was, and he knew he couldn’t let this moment end, not yet. “I don’t suppose you’d let me buy you a coffee?”

  “I thought you had to go to see your father?” Lexi said, giving him a questioning look.

  “I do,” he replied with a smile. “I did… I mean… I can text Mom and tell her I’ll be there soon. They won’t be ready to go for a little while anyway.”

  She gazed at him for a moment, as Liam prepared himself for her to make her excuses and leave.

  “It’s just coffee,” he pushed, desperate for her to say yes. “Just as friends.”

  “I’d love to,” Lexi said, giving him a smile that made his heart hammer in his chest, just like it always did when she smiled at him.

  “Great,” he said, pulling his phone from his pocket. He quickly tapped out a message to his mom, before slipping it back into his pocket. “I’m all yours now.”

  Lexi smiled, but Liam cringed as he realised what he had said.

  They both turned and slowly made their way along to corridor to the coffee shop that was at the far end of the hospital, but neither of them said a word. When they reached the counter, without thinking, Liam order two lattes, one with a sprinkle of nutmeg.

  “I’m sorry,” Liam said, realising what he just did. “I should have asked what you wanted.”

  “No, you got it right,” Lexi replied, giving him a smile. “I’m surprised you remembered.”

  “I remember everything,” Liam said honestly, looking Lexi in the eye. She held his gaze for a moment, before she quickly turned away, her face flushed with embarrassment.

  They both picked up their coffees, before they made their way to a table in the corner.

  “So how is life as a cop?” Lexi asked after a few minutes of tentative silence. Liam knew she was just as nervous as he was, maybe even more.

  “It’s good,” Liam replied, with a broad smile. “I made detective a couple of years ago, so I am pretty happy with how things are going. Since Dad retired…”

  “Your Dad retired?” Lexi said, surprised by what he said. Liam knew that Lexi understood how important Sean’s job had been to him.

  “Yeah,” Liam said, realising how much had happened since he had last seen her. “He was sick a few years back, he had cancer. He beat it, but then he decided life was too short, so he retired, and now he is loving life on the golf course.”

  “Wow!” Lexi exclaimed with a worried look. “But he’s okay now? I mean other than this recent thing.”

  “Yeah,” Liam said, giving her a sad smile. “He’s going to be just fine.”

  “Good,” Lexi replied, smiling too.

  “What about you?” Liam asked with a smile. The truth was, Liam already knew that Lexi was doing really well for herself, as he had followed her career over the years. Still, he thought it best not to mention that. He thought it might make him sound a little stalkerish, so he pretended he knew nothing.

  “Me?” She asked with a smile. “Oh, I guess everything is going well. I worked for a couple of the big magazines in New York. I’ve also had a few exhibitions there too. It’s funny, I thought I saw you at one once. Just for a moment, but I was wrong. Besides, why would you have been all the way across the country?”

  “Wow,” Liam replied with a nervous laugh, it was his turn to be embarrassed now knowing that she hadn’t been mistaken. He just wasn’t ready to admit that. “Sounds like you’re doing amazing. You must be happy. Your life turned out exactly like you planned.”

  “Yeah, I guess,” Lexi replied, her smile faded a little, but this time she didn’t look at Liam. Instead, she picked up a sugar packet from the small bowl in the centre of the table and began to pick at it.

  Liam noticed a flash of sadness in her eyes, but she quickly pulled it back. He knew he had struck a nerve. There was something she wasn’t saying; something he wasn’t seeing, he just had no clue what that something was.

  “Lex,” Liam whispered, as he reached out and took hold of her hand. “Have I said something wrong?”

  “No,” Lexi said, shaking her head, as she pulled her hand free. Suddenly tears glistened in her eyes. She quickly blew out a long breath. “Maybe this was a mistake.”

  She stood up to leave, but Liam quickly grabbed her hand, stopping her.

  “Lexi, please don’t walk away again,” Liam begged. “Please.”

  She stared at him for a moment, and he could see the uncertainty in her eyes.

  “I wish I could go back and undo what happened,” he continued, aware that they were now being watched by some of the other people in the coffee shop, but right at that moment, Liam didn’t care. “Believe me, I do. I think about that night all the time. About how stupid I was. How, if I could go back, I would do everything so differently. Part of me wishes that I never told you about that girl, if I had kept my stupid mouth shut, you wouldn’t have left me, and I wouldn’t have lost the greatest thing that ever happened to me.”

  “Please, don’t,” she whispered, her tears finally breaking free and trickling down her face.

  “There is not one day that goes by that I don’t regret what I did,” Liam continued, moving closer to her. “I hate myself for what I did to you; for what I did to us.”

  “It was a long time ago,” she breathed out, as her breath caught in her throat.

  “Lexi, please,” Liam whispered, as he reached up, softly wiping the tears from her face. “I know I have no right to ask for anything from you, but please, don’t walk away again,”

  She blew out a long breath before she allowed her eyes to meet Liam’s.

  “Please, Lexi,” he pushed. “Can we try to just be friends?”

&n
bsp; She stared at him for a moment, before giving him an unsure smile. Finally she released a long breath, before she slowly lowered herself back into her seat.

  “Thank you,” Liam said, as he too sat back down, but still he didn’t release her hand. “So, tell me; now you’re back in San Francisco, what are you going to do.”

  “I’m thinking of opening up my own studio,” Lexi explained, her eyes fixed on their fingers, intertwined with each other. “I still do some freelance work for magazines and editorials, but right now, I want to focus on my own ideas. I have been approached to do another exhibition here in San Francisco, so I am working on that.”

  “That’s amazing news,” Liam said with a genuine smile. He was happy that she seemed to be happy with her life, even if he wasn’t part of it any longer.

  “That’s what really brought me back here,” she sighed, finally allowing her eyes to meet his. “Well that and Eric’s job. I thought as he was coming out here, now seemed like a good time to come back. Like I said, I always did love San Francisco.”

  “I’m glad you’re happy, Lex,” Liam said, meaning every word. “I know I’ve hurt you in the past, but all I ever wanted was for you to be happy

  “I am happy, Liam,” she replied, allowing her eyes to hold his.

  Liam could feel his heart ache once more. Sitting across from Lexi, he knew more than ever that he’d never stopped loving her; not for one second. If anything, the love he felt for her was stronger now more than it had ever been. He just hated that he wasn’t the one that made her happy.

  The only thing he’d ever done was break her heart. He knew that he could never undo the hurt he caused her. He also knew that this Eric guy, might even be the better man for her. Still, he longed to beg her to give him one more chance.

  “I’m happy that you’re happy,” Liam replied, deciding that it was the right thing to do.

  “Thank you,” Lexi replied, her eyes meeting his once more. This time she gave him a genuine smile, but still, there was sadness in her eyes, something Liam had only ever seen in her eyes once before, and that time it was because of him.