Dare To Be Successful

by John Barrett Hawkins

Nikki, who shared a bedroom with Grace and was two years younger, said that she appreciated it when her sister took the time to help her with her chores. “I can’t even count how many times you’ve made my bed or cleaned up my messes without ever saying a word or asking for anything in return. I’ve never said it before, but I want you to know that I’m glad you came to live with us.”

  Finally, Grace’s youngest sister, six-year-old Kari, said, “You’re a great big sister because when Mommy and Daddy were too busy, you read bedtime stories to me. My favorite was The Dancing Ballerina, because you’d always pick me up and dance around the room.”

  Kari sat on Grace’s lap, opened the book and remarked, “Look, this is the part where you always said, ‘You’re going to be a pretty ballerina when you grow up and I’m going to be your teacher.’ It always made me feel good when you said that. If you want, I’ll read it to you before bedtime tonight. It’ll make you feel better.”

  Grace hugged her baby sister and spoke for the first time. “I think I’d like that.”

  Her father Stan spoke next: “All of my children possess at least one special quality, and Grace, yours is a loving heart. You always compose the sweetest poems for me on Father’s Day. I still have all of them and read them whenever I’m feeling down. And I love it when I come home from a hard day’s work and you offer to massage my feet. You express your love so effortlessly.”

  Emilee spoke last: “A mother is supposed to love all of her children equally, but that’s not really how it works. You were always my favorite child, probably because you’re so much like Kate. Your mother was my best friend for over twenty years, and you’re her carbon copy. Losing your mother was the most painful thing I’ve ever experienced. It’s as if a part of me died with her. Then you came into our lives, and your personality is so much like hers. She was a very compassionate person and a great listener. Whenever I had a problem, she would be the one I’d discuss it with, and she’d always know just what to say. Even as a little girl you had those same qualities. I’ve always thought that God brought you to our family as a gift for me, to ease the pain of my loss. Eventually you took your mother’s place as my closest friend. I love you so much, Grace.”

  Tears streamed down Grace’s face in an endless flow. She got up from the chair and fiercely hugged her adoptive mother. Between sobs she said, “I love you, too, Emilee. I’m so sorry for all the bad things I’ve done.”

  Kari ran over and wrapped her arms around Grace’s waist. She was quickly joined by everyone else in a group family hug with Grace in the center. They were all crying and telling her how much they loved her.

  Daniel was awestruck by the moment. He reminisced about the time when he was in the Circle of Love and became enveloped by those wonderful feelings again. He said a silent prayer, thanking God for giving him the opportunity to learn from Free Spirit and to share the wisdom of the medicine men with others.

  The next day Daniel introduced Grace’s parents to Elle Banks, the school psychologist. Elle was uniquely qualified to help Grace recover from the traumatic gangbanging experience. She had graduated Summa Cum Laude from Stanford University with a Bachelor’s Degree in child psychology. After college, Elle enlisted in the Air Force, where she continued her education. Elle got a Ph.D. in clinical psychology. She served two 14-month tours of duty in Iraq, where she worked with soldiers and civilians who had been traumatized by the war. For the last two years Elle had worked for the school district as a roving psychological trauma specialist. She would meet with Grace once a week for as long as it took for her to recover.

  Grace liked Elle from the moment they met. Although she was 29 years old, Elle Banks looked like an edgy college student. She had several visible tattoos, a nose ring, and a stylish wardrobe. Elle established a rapport with Grace by telling her about why she became a psychologist. When Elle was at Stanford, three boys had raped her best friend Jade. Jade was so traumatized by the experience that she quit school and returned to live with her parents, rarely leaving the house. During that time period Elle was studying Dr. Robert Atler’s book, The Transformative Power of Crisis. Adler had written:

  The most effective way to help someone who is not feeling good about themselves is to nurture their self-esteem with repeated messages of approval, gratitude, recognition, admiration, and love. Use every opportunity to convey to him his wonderfulness. We can use notes on pillows and counters, letters in the mail, postcards, telephones, answering machines, Fax machines, email. Praise him, appreciate him, commend him, tell him he’s good, tell him he’s wonderful, tell him you like him, and tell him you love him.1

  Elle had shared this information with all of Jade’s friends and family members, who followed Elle’s advice to shower Jade with appreciation and love. It worked. Jade had a complete recovery. She became a happily married woman with two children and had a successful career as a journalist.

  Grace felt so comfortable with Elle that she told her everything about her life. She shared her fleeting memories of her birth parents. Her most vivid memories were of opening presents on Christmas morning and how much her parents loved her. Grace also spoke of the pain of losing her parents. Emilee, her adoptive mom, had to teach Grace about death when Grace was only five years of age. Her birth mother’s funeral was the saddest day of Grace’s young life. Emilee loved Grace and became her new mom. Grace also felt loved by her seven adoptive siblings. With time the painful memory of her parents’ deaths faded away. Then an adopted boy in Grace’s class met his birth parents and told everyone how he was just like his parents. Grace began to wonder if she was anything like her birth parents. Grace had Googled her parents’ names and discovered a slew of sordid stories. Her birth mother, Kate, had been portrayed as promiscuous. The news reporter speculated that Grace’s father, Max, had murdered her in a jealous rage because of infidelity. When Grace discussed the news reports with Emilee, Emilee said they were untrue and that reporters frequently lied to sensationalize crime stories. Grace didn’t believe Emilee. On some level, Grace wanted to be like her birth parents. When the 15th Street gang members befriended her, she created a false persona to try to fit in with them. Grace told Elle about beating up younger girls to take their money, her drug use, drug dealing, and about the gangbanging incident. Grace was ashamed of her conduct. She wanted to change and become a better person. She also told Elle about Mr. Benson — how he had been there to save her that day in the park, and how he was using the detention sessions to teach her the Principles of Grace. She admitted that she hadn’t been paying attention most of the time, but that she was going to start taking her schoolwork more seriously.

  Elle was intrigued by the Principles of Grace. She met with Daniel and he told her about the wisdom of the medicine men and his summer aboard the Awakening Grace. Daniel wasn’t sure if the teaching format was working with Grace, but he was determined to continue teaching the material for the final eight weeks of the school year.

  The next week’s principle was Eliminate Negative Energy. Daniel told Elle about the burn away the past ceremony, and asked if she thought it would be helpful for Grace. Elle related that a psychologist named James Pennebaker at Southern Methodist University had demonstrated through numerous studies that when patients wrote about painful experiences, their health improved significantly. Elle said, “Writing therapy unburdens the soul. And the medicine men’s idea to then burn the paper afterwards is absolutely brilliant. I love the concept of a ceremony to burn away the past. Can I do this with you and Grace?”

  Daniel was delighted to have Elle’s assistance. At the Friday detention session they both told Grace about the burn away the past ceremony. For the first time Grace took one of Mr. Benson’s assignments seriously. She wrote about everything she had told Elle, every painful thing that she wanted to forget about. Elle also took the assignment to heart. She sat at one of the desks in the classroom and wrote about all the horrible things she experienced in Iraq. Elle’s participation inspired Daniel to do the assignment too. S
ince meeting Emilee and learning about what happened to Grace’s birth parents, Daniel had felt terrible concerning the prejudice he had demonstrated toward inner-city kids for many years. He wrote about every incident that he could recall. It was difficult to admit that he had been a bigot and a poor teacher.

  Daniel had purchased a flammable log for the ceremony. After all three had completed their writing exercise, Daniel suggested they go to the beach for the burning. Elle had a different idea. She wanted to go to Columbia Park — to the shack. Daniel objected.

  “Grace is a strong girl,” Elle said. “She’s ready to move on and put this behind her. Going back to the shack for this burn away the past ceremony is the best way for her to slay the dragon. This will truly be a new beginning. What do you think, Grace?”

  Grace wanted to forget that horrible day. If Elle thought that going back to the park was best, then she was all for it. She wasn’t scared.

  Daniel reluctantly agreed, and the three of them drove the short distance to the park. Grace led her teacher and her psychologist through the woods to the campground area that Sly and the other gangsters called “the shack.” The smell of pine trees awoke the dreadful memory in Grace’s subconscious.

  As Daniel made the fire, Grace stared at the public restroom building. Grace hated Sly for stealing her innocence and her virtue. Yet, that hatred seemed to dissolve as Daniel crumpled up a piece of paper and threw it into the fire.

  “Today I burn away the past and begin a new life,” Daniel stated.

  Elle followed suit.

  Grace continued to stare at the shack and think about Sly. Then the strangest thing happened. A vision of the classroom blackboard with the Eliminate Negative Energy principle appeared in Grace’s mind. With great clarity she saw one sentence: Give the gift of forgiveness to those who have wronged you. At that moment Grace walked over to the fire and crumpled up her piece of paper. She tossed it in and said, “Today I burn away the past and I burn away my hatred toward the boys who hurt me. Sly, wherever you are, I forgive you.” Tears began to roll down her face. “I forgive you. I forgive you. Today I burn away the past and begin a new life.”

  Grace exploded into huge sobs. Elle and Daniel took turns hugging her and telling her how proud they were of her. Grace was so grateful to have both of them in her life.

  The next week Daniel taught the class the principle Cultivate Positive Energy. He shared the insights from his all-time favorite book Power vs. Force by David R. Hawkins, who used the science of kinesiology to discover attractor fields in human consciousness.

  The results of Hawkins’ 30-year scientific study demonstrated that human beings could align their own consciousness with either positive or negative attractor fields that would have a profound influence on their lives. Thoughts, emotions, and attitudes associated with shame, guilt, grief, fear, anger, and vengeance draw negative people and circumstances into one’s life. The positive energy attractor fields are connected with things like courage, love, peace, optimism, nobility, and forgiveness. Hawkins found that power arises from meaning and nobility of purpose, and this meaning has to do with the significance of life itself. Service to, and compassion for others, were found to be among the strongest attractor energy fields.46 Dr. Hawkins writes:

  Kinesiology is the study of muscles and their movement. The field was pioneered by Dr. John Goodheart and Dr. John Diamond whose startling discovery was that certain indicator muscles would strengthen or weaken in the presence of positive or negative physical, emotional, or intellectual stimuli. A smile will make you test strong, while the statement “I hate you” will make you test weak. The implication was that at a level far below conceptual consciousness, the body “knew,” and through muscle testing was able to signal what was good and bad for it.

  To begin the testing procedure, two people are required. One acts as test subject by holding one arm laterally, parallel to the floor. The second person presses down with two fingers on the wrist of the extended arm. The idea is to test the bounce and spring in the arm. If the arm remains locked, the test is strong. However, if the test is repeated in the presence of a negative stimulus, although you are pushing down no harder than before, the muscle will not be able to resist the pressure and the subject’s arm will fall to his side.46

  Daniel performed the kinesiology tests with his students using a variety of stimuli. One student tested strong while holding an organically grown apple, but tested weak while holding an apple that had been sprayed with pesticides. Another student tested strong when he imagined a wonderful Thanksgiving dinner with his family, yet tested weak when he envisioned punching a boy who once stole his bike. The class conducted tests for several days with some enlightening results. Grace tested strong in the presence of the Principles of Grace syllabus, even though she admitted that she had not read any of it. On some primal level her body knew that the information was beneficial. All of the students tested weak when they held thoughts of guilt, shame, jealousy, or revenge.

  The liveliest debates between the students erupted over what kinds of music would strengthen or weaken their bodies. The biggest, strongest boy in the class held a gangster rap CD and watched the smallest girl push his arm down with relative ease. Daniel explained that it was not the rhythms, but the lyrics that caused him to test weak. The rapper spoke about violence and used words such as “nigger” and “bitch,” which are offensive to black people and women. The fact that the student being tested was a white male didn’t matter, because in our universe’s continuum of interconnected electromagnetic fields, there is no separation between black and white or male and female. If the rapper said something offensive about anyone, it weakened everyone. The students were equally surprised when the small girl tested strong while holding a Christian CD and later declared, “I’m Jewish. I don’t even believe in Christ.”

  That too was irrelevant; the CD’s message was one of love and forgiveness. It was good, and her body instantly knew it was good. Grace enjoyed the kinesiology exercises. The body’s intuitive wisdom amazed her. She was also able to grasp the concept of attractor energy fields; she saw the direct correlation between her negative choices to harm others and using drugs and the subsequent gangbanging experience. She studied the Cultivate Positive Energy principle on the classroom blackboard and made a personal commitment to make positive changes.

  When Daniel and Grace were alone at the next detention session, he asked her to put the following week’s principle — Believe in Yourself and Believe in Your Divinity — on the blackboard Then he gave her a spiral bound journal as a gift. It had a beautiful black leather cover with embossed lettering that read: The Private Journal of Grace Gilmore. Inside there were seven sections: 1.) The Principles of Grace syllabus, 2.) accomplishments scorecard, 3.) daily affirmations, 4.) creativity, 5.) goals, 6.) action plans, and 7.) daily planner. The journal opened so that a new daily planner could be inserted every year.

  Grace ran her fingers across the embossed lettering. “Thank you, Mr. Benson,” she said. “This is awesome.”

  Daniel took Grace through various sections and offered some insights: “A regular journal writing practice is an excellent tool for achieving your goals in life. Thoughts are fleeting, and if we don’t write them down, we frequently lose them. If you schedule a half hour a day just to sit quietly and think, you will be amazed by the creative ideas that pop into your head. That’s what the creativity section is for. The action plans and daily planner sections will help you stay organized. The daily affirmations section is a great place to write down new habits you want to practice. In the beginning section you will find the entire Principles of Grace syllabus. I recommend rereading this once every week and allow these principles to become a guiding force in your life.”

  The accomplishments scorecard section of the journal was created by Daniel as a self-esteem building exercise. During the detention he assigned Grace the task of writing in her journal every one of her accomplishments or successes. At first Grace couldn’t
think of anything, so Daniel guided her along.

  “Can you ride a bike?” he asked.

  “Of course,” Grace replied. “Since I was five years old.”

  “It may not seem like an accomplishment now,” Daniel said, “but there was a time when you couldn’t do it. The purpose of the accomplishment scorecard is to establish a written record of your successes in life. This will help you develop the self-confidence that you can accomplish difficult tasks in the future.”

  With her teacher’s prodding, Grace began to recall many accomplishments, such as the first goal she scored in soccer, getting all A’s on her report card in second grade, learning how to swim, building a doll house, and her first job babysitting. Grace completely lost track of time as she wrote in her journal. When the two-hour detention was over, Grace had listed 50 separate accomplishments. The following day she reread the list several times because it made her feel good about herself.

  From his review of her permanent record, Daniel was aware that Grace’s grades had gotten progressively worse over the past three years; however, she had been a good student during primary school. As a confidence and self-esteem booster, he assigned the class a series of open-book tests. Daniel thought that Grace could easily look up the answers and get a good grade. But Grace had become a lazy student. When it came time for the multiple choice test, she randomly selected her answers without even reading the questions. Daniel held her after class to

  tell her how he felt about her results.

  “I’m very disappointed with your efforts, Grace,” he said. “I think it’s important for you to know that I’m not disappointed in you, I’m disappointed for you. You’re a bright young lady with unlimited potential. I believe you are capable of accomplishing goals beyond your current imagination, but that can only happen if you apply yourself.”

  Daniel then showed Grace how to prepare for a test, explaining the simplicity of the open-book variety. Grace reluctantly accepted the teacher’s instruction and was surprised to find that the test really was easy. Daniel allowed Grace to take the test again, and she got every answer correct. He wrote 100% and a big red A on the top of her paper. As Grace looked at the A, she felt something that she had not felt in a long time — a sense of accomplishment with her schoolwork. Those feelings were reinforced as she continued to get A’s on Mr. Benson’s open-book tests.

  At the next detention session Grace put the Connect With Your Intuitive Intelligence principle on the blackboard. As she wrote, a question popped into her head. How had Mr. Benson known that she needed help that day in the park? And how had he known where to find her? She asked her teacher if he was psychic.

  Daniel laughed. “All human beings possess intuitive intelligence, yet most don’t know how to use it. We get intuitive signals all the time. Sometimes they come in the form of unusual coincidences or hunches or creative ideas that just won’t go away. The key is to pay attention and discern in which direction your intuition is guiding you.

  “Sometimes our dreams give us guidance. A perfect example is Stephanie Myers, who had a very vivid dream about a romantic vampire. When she awoke the next morning, something told her to write a vampire book based upon the dream. Stephanie was not a writer, nor had she ever imagined writing a book. But she decided to follow her intuitive intelligence and wrote Twilight. It became the first of four bestselling vampire novels.

  “Another way to connect with your intuitive intelligence is to pay attention to the sensations in your body. If you get the chills or the hairs on your arms stand up, or you suddenly feel sick to your stomach for no apparent reason, pay attention to what’s going on around you. We get signals like this all the time. That’s how I knew you were in trouble that day. I looked out the window and saw you get into a car. When I saw the boy who was driving, I got a sick feeling in my stomach. I just knew something was wrong. The feeling was very strong. That’s why I tried to follow you. Have you ever had a strong feeling like that?”

  Grace thought about the question and remembered how uneasy she felt every time she and the other gang members picked on someone or stole something. She also remembered the voice in her head that said, This is wrong. Don’t do this! on the day of the gangbanging. Her intuitive intelligence was sending her messages all along…but she wasn’t listening.

  “Your intuitive intelligence is like an internal guidance system that can lead you to your dream career,” Daniel said. “What skills do you most enjoy using? What subjects interest you? What are you passionate about? What do you enjoy doing that also feels very natural to you?”

  At first Grace wasn’t sure, then Daniel suggested she recall the things her family members said during the Circle of Love ceremony, then write them in her journal. For the next hour Grace considered that incredible day when her family showered her with compliments and love. She listed everything she could remember, and when she was done, she had an answer for her teacher.

  “Dancing,” Grace announced confidently. “It’s something I love to do, it comes naturally, and my family thinks I’m good at it.”

  Daniel believed that the best way to nurture kids’ self-esteem was to immerse them in activities that allowed them to express their natural talents. He suggested to Grace that she start taking some dance classes. Together they surfed the Internet to explore what types of dance interested her most, and what classes were being offered at local dance studios. Grace wanted to learn the Latin dances, salsa in particular. They found a local studio and went to their website. Unfortunately, the classes were expensive. Grace could not ask her parents for the money because her father had recently lost his job due to the poor economy.

  “The best things in life never come easily,” Daniel told Grace. “But there is always a way. It’s about problem solving. You have to find a way to earn the money yourself. What about your after-school job at the Touch Outreach Foundation?”

  “It’s community service for the crime I committed. They don’t pay me.”

  Daniel was aware of the fact that Grace didn’t get paid, because he was the person who had gotten her the job. He also knew that if Grace could earn the money needed to pay for the dance classes, it would boost her self-esteem. He suggested that Grace speak with her boss about the possibility of a paying position on the weekends. After Grace agreed to that course of action, Daniel spoke with his friend at the Touch Outreach Foundation. Daniel’s friend agreed to help.

  When Grace arrived for detention the following Friday, she saw that her teacher had put something new on the classroom blackboard: the 12 steps of Narcotics Anonymous. Following her arrest for selling pot at school and extorting her classmates, the juvenile court judge required that Grace attend weekly N.A. for Minors meetings. Daniel wanted to see whether Grace was still using drugs and whether she was applying the 12 steps to her recovery.

  Grace looked at the blackboard and commented, “That doesn’t look like a Principles of Grace assignment to me. I must be in the wrong class.”

  “I thought we might discuss something different today,” Daniel replied. “I was wondering if you are still using or selling drugs, and what you think about the 12 steps.”

  “I never sold hard drugs, only marijuana. It’s practically legal in California. There are medical marijuana shops all over the state.”

  Grace’s answer indicated that she didn’t believe there was anything wrong with pot, and that concerned Daniel. He measured his response, then said, “Medical marijuana is like any other prescription drug. Doctors prescribe it to adults for specific ailments. It is illegal for minors to use the drug. Smoking pot damages brain cells and lung tissue. It will also impair your judgment, and for most kids, marijuana is the first step on a path that leads to using hard drugs. That is why it is referred to as a ‘gateway drug.’”

  At first Grace was defensive and afraid to discuss her pot use with her teacher, but Mr. Benson had proved that he really did care about her. Grace saw that he only wanted to help her become a better person. She considered hi
s words, and thought about how Sly had gotten her hooked on smoking pot prior to her experiment with heroin. Grace agreed with her teacher’s assessment that marijuana is a gateway drug, and then told him that she had not used anything since the Circle of Love ceremony, nor would she ever be tempted to use illegal drugs again.

  Daniel turned his attention to the blackboard and asked Grace if she would consider step eight and use the detention period to make a list of all the people she had harmed.

  Grace embraced the assignment with an open mind, but was distraught to find the names of 28 people on the list upon completion. She couldn’t believe she had hurt so many people. Grace felt terrible about some of the things she had done, especially beating up smaller girls and stealing from them. Grace thought about step number nine, and decided that she was going to make direct amends to each person on the list.

  On the way home from school that day, Grace contemplated the list and it caused her to think about her father’s favorite TV show, “My Name Is Earl.” The program is about a reforming bad boy named Earl who aspires to do something nice for every person he has harmed. Grace decided that she would do the same thing. She intended to approach all 28 people on her list to ask for their forgiveness, and ask what she could do to make amends. Upon making the decision Grace felt a powerful surge of positive energy uplift her spirits, and she wondered if her intention to serve others had enabled her to access the attractor energy field Mr. Benson had told the class about. Just thinking about making amends made Grace feel good and consider the lessons she was learning in her science class.

  Daniel’s next lecture to his students focused on the principle Develop Persistence and Adaptability. He emphasized the importance of believing in your own future vision, even when others could not see it, and shared Sylvester Stallone’s Rocky story. When Stallone wrote the script for Rocky, he approached movie studios with the intention of being cast in the starring role. Numerous studios offered to buy the script, but they did not want Stallone to be the star. Several prominent actors, including Burt Reynolds, James Caan, and Ryan O’Neal wanted to play the part of Rocky Balboa. Stallone rejected the offers because his dream was to become a movie star. After five long years of searching, Stallone found a producer who would purchase the script and cast him in the role. The movie became the blockbuster hit of 1976, earning Oscar awards for best picture and best director. Stallone’s dream of becoming a movie star was realized because of his persistence.

  To illustrate the significance of developing adaptability when pursuing one’s goals, Daniel told the story of two other famous actors, Matt Damon and Ben Affleck. During the 1990’s, Damon and Affleck were aspiring actors who struggled to find an agent or get auditions. The competition to become a leading man in Hollywood was fierce. The two men faced constant rejection, so they adapted by following Stallone’s blueprint for success. Together they wrote the script for Good Will Hunting and sought a movie studio who would cast them in the starring roles. A friend of a friend eventually gave the script to the actor Robin Williams, who loved it. Williams turned the script over to an equally enthusiastic producer who agreed to make the movie. It was a huge success. Good Will Hunting was nominated for several Oscars, and it launched the acting careers of Damon and Affleck.

  Daniel encouraged his students to develop a willingness to adapt to rejection, failure, and mistakes when pursuing their dreams. As they set out to execute their action plans, they were likely to encounter numerous unseen problems. He encouraged them to develop a problem-solving mindset.

  “The key to success,” Daniel concluded, “is to view all challenges and adversities as opportunities for growth. Within every problem you face in life, there is a lesson to be learned. A successful life is not defined by the attainment of our goals, but by the lessons learned on the journey. If you remain persistent and continue to adapt, you will always be learning and growing. Train yourself to embrace the striving and find joy in new discoveries.”

  Grace enjoyed Mr. Benson’s stories about the actors and the fact that he was always encouraging the students to pursue their dreams. She was beginning to like some of his goofy sayings, such as “be the best you can be every day,” “nurture your gifts,” and “always reach for the stars.” She was even becoming interested in science, and was curious about what Mr. Benson would teach next. Even though she would never admit it to anyone, Grace actually looked forward to his class and the Friday detention periods.

  Daniel felt that developing relationships with other people who share values, principles, and goals was one of the most important things that he had learned from Free Spirit, and he spoke with great enthusiasm when teaching the principle Connect With Others. Daniel specifically wanted his students to value mentor/mentee relationships. He told his students about the medicine men’s belief that a person could only reach their highest potential through the guidance of a mentor. In our society, this belief also holds true in sports, where great coaches are sought out because of their ability to inspire peak performance, and in business, where lifestyle coaches guide CEOs to optimum efficiency.46

  As Grace listened to Mr. Benson talk about connecting with others, she realized that he had become her mentor. No teacher had ever cared about her the way he did. Following one of the suggestions on the classroom blackboard, she went to Hallmark and purchased a thank you card and presented it to her teacher. She wanted him to know that she was grateful for everything he had done for her.

  Each week Daniel concluded his class with a personal story about whatever principle he was teaching, but this particular week Grace asked if she could share a story of her own. She said she had recently experienced something amazing by connecting with others and she wanted to share it with her fellow students.

  The next day Grace stood at the front of the classroom and spoke about her after-school job organizing games and activities for terminally ill children at the Touch Outreach Foundation. Initially, she related that she had a bad attitude and did not want to waste her time at a job she did not enjoy. Then she met Jillian, a six-year-old girl who was dying from leukemia. Jillian would not play with the other kids, only with Grace. She followed Grace around like a lost puppy, always asking to hold her hand or sit on her lap. In the beginning Grace found this attachment annoying, but in time she softened, and they developed a friendship.

  Jillian adored Grace, and as soon as Grace arrived at the foundation, Jillian would run and leap into Grace’s arms, hugging her fiercely. When it was time to go home, Jillian would always give Grace a big hug and kiss and say, “I love you, Grace Gilmore. You’re my best friend in the whole wide world.” Grace started to look forward to Jillian’s toothless, illuminating smile, and felt disappointment when she missed her massage appointments.

  Tears rolled down Grace’s cheeks as she told her classmates about recently visiting Jillian in the hospital. The little girl was very weak and in considerable pain. Grace held her hand and told her that she loved her for the first time. Jillian smiled, but then turned her attention to the ceiling and said, “Do you see the light? It’s so beautiful.”

  Grace did not see anything unusual, but she was aware that something was happening to Jillian when she heard her say, “Who’s Emma?” Jillian said that Emma had come to take her home and that she could see through the light that home was a place that was filled with love. Then Jillian reached out with both hands toward the ceiling, evidently to grasp Emma’s hands. A moment later Jillian passed away.