The Adventurer's Guide to Treasure (and How to Steal It)

by Wade Albert White

  “There are platforms like this all over the Haven,” said Marri. “Pirating isn’t the safest of professions, as I’m sure you can imagine, and there are plenty of pirates who find it difficult getting around a place like this. These and other devices make it much easier.”

  “Is that what happened to your legs?” asked Penelope. “Were you injured in some battle?”

  Anne gasped. “Penelope! That’s none of our business.”

  “It’s okay,” said Marri. “I don’t mind. And the answer to the question is no, I wasn’t injured in my career as a pirate. My legs have been like this since birth. I do find it somewhat ironic, though, given the reputation pirates generally have, that a pirate haven would provide the best accessibility in all the Hierarchy. It’s hard to hunt for treasure in places where there are only stairs.”

  Anne was perplexed. Away from the demands of the pirate ship, Marri seemed less on edge and more relaxed and conversational. It was a welcome change. Anne was curious how someone so young had even become the captain of a pirate ship, but now wasn’t the time to inquire.

  When their turn came, they took the next empty platform. Marri activated the waterwheel, and the platform carried them up. They passed several levels until they reached the one labeled PYRATE MUSEUM. Marri deactivated the waterwheel, and the platform came to a halt.

  “It’s just at the end of this street,” she said.

  The museum was an architectural wonder, although less in the that’s-the-most-beautiful-building-I’ve-ever-seen sort of way, and more in the I-wonder-why-it-hasn’t-yet-collapsed-under-its-own-weight sort of way. It was an eclectic mix of crumbling stone buildings, dilapidated wooden shacks, and broken towers. It extended haphazardly in all directions, with no sense of design or even common sense. One section even stretched toward the center of the cavern on a loose (and continuously bobbing) series of anchored airships.

  “That’s… interesting,” said Penelope.

  “I could stand guard outside,” offered Hiro. “You know, in case the Wizards’ Council shows up.”

  Anne shook her head. “Everyone’s going in. We’re staying together.”

  Marri handed Anne a strip of material. “You’d better wrap this around your gauntlet. It’s bad enough we’re returning to the scene of the crime, but we’re carrying the stolen medallion with us.”

  Anne wound the cloth around her gauntlet until it was fully covered. Hopefully no one would question why she was wearing it.

  The front doors of the museum opened into a spacious lobby. A mosaic of small black and white tiles formed a skull and crossbones on the floor. The skeleton of what Anne assumed to be a massive whale hung from the ceiling, and the air smelled of dried seaweed, pipe tobacco, and musty old ship’s logs. They proceeded to a long counter. A wizened clerk had his back to them filing papers. Marri cleared her throat loudly, and the clerk jumped.

  “Goodness me,” he said. He adjusted his spectacles and studied her face. “Ah, Captain Blackwood. Back again so soon?”

  Marri nodded. “I’m afraid so. I need to get back into the special medallion exhibit.”

  “Oh, dear,” croaked the clerk. He lowered his voice as though he didn’t want anyone to overhear, even though there was no one else in the lobby. “I’m very sorry, Captain, but I’m afraid we’ve had a robbery. Not long after you left yesterday, in fact. It’s just terrible. One of our most valuable pieces. The special medallion collection is closed while the investigators gather evidence.”

  “We promise we won’t disturb anything. I just need to double-check the information I copied down when I was in there.”

  The clerk wrung his hands. “They said they don’t want anyone going in while they’re looking for clues. They were quite specific about that. Everyone’s very upset.”

  Marri leaned closer. “I’m embarrassed to have to confess this, but I messed up. I was supposed to get some information about an old quest, but I looked at the wrong medallion. Any other time I would be happy to wait, but let’s just say Octo-Horse Pirate isn’t very pleased with me right now.”

  The clerk let out a squeak at the mention of Octo-Horse Pirate, and Anne wondered again what it was about him that put everyone on edge.

  “You’re on a mission for the supreme leader?” the clerk asked after he had regained his composure.

  Marri glanced to her left and right before answering, as though she too were concerned about being overheard. “A top-secret mission,” she said in a low voice. “And now I’m in big trouble. There’s no telling what he’ll do if I don’t get the right information to him soon.”

  The expression on the clerk’s face suggested that he knew exactly the types of things Octo-Horse Pirate might do and that he had no interest in any of them happening here.

  “I heard that once, while in a terrible rage, he pulled the arms off an entire coop of chickens,” said the clerk.

  “Um, chickens don’t have arms,” said Hiro.

  “Not after he finished with them, they didn’t. That’s for certain.”

  With a wink to Anne, Penelope leaned an elbow on the counter. “I heard about that one,” she said in a conspiratorial whisper. “And rumor has it he did the exact same thing to a pit full of snakes.”

  The clerk shuddered. “You don’t say?”

  “Can I just point out—” Hiro started to say, but Anne clamped her hand over his mouth.

  “Please, can you help us out?” said Marri.

  Despite their efforts, Anne feared the clerk wasn’t going to let them in. His expression kept changing, as though a great internal debate were raging inside him. Finally, he seemed to come to a decision.

  “Very well, very well,” he said while wiping his brow with a handkerchief. “Exceptions must sometimes be made for extenuating circumstances. Come with me.”

  “Thank you so much,” said Marri.

  They followed the clerk across the lobby to a large archway that led to the east wing of the museum. A sign over the archway read MEDALLION COLLECTION. Two guards were blocking the archway, but with a wave from the clerk they stepped aside and let the group pass. The first room was huge, with hundreds of medallions on display in large glass cases. This part of the museum was built out of stone and appeared marginally less likely to fall apart, although Anne did note that one wall was currently being propped up with oars from a rowboat.

  “Oh, wow, that’s Countess von Cheesecake’s Emerald Medallion,” said Hiro as they passed the first row of display cases. “And there’s the Double Medallion of the Wizard of Krackleberry. And the thirteen-pointed Starfish Medallion!”

  Anne couldn’t help but notice the half dozen guards stationed around the room. Her gauntlet-hand felt abnormally heavy all of a sudden, and beads of sweat began to trickle down her back. She kept her eyes forward and hoped no one was studying them too closely.

  Penelope pointed to a display case. “Why does that medallion look like a shriveled avocado?”

  “Because it is a shriveled avocado,” said the clerk. “Surely you’ve heard the story of Captain Avery’s Avocado?”

  “Um, I don’t think so.”

  “Captain Avery was a cunning pirate, but unfortunately he became convinced that the avocado in that display case was a quest medallion. Wouldn’t hear a word to the contrary. He claimed it spoke to him in a dream one night and told him to go on a quest to make himself king of the dragons. The dragons killed him, of course. They tend not to mess around. But the avocado was preserved in his memory.”

  “Why?”

  The clerk shrugged. “As a warning not to believe everything an avocado tells you in a dream, I suppose.”

  Several archways led to other exhibits. The clerk guided them to one on the far wall labeled SPECIAL COLLECTIONS. The next room was considerably smaller and contained a number of alcoves. One of the alcoves had been cordoned off with a lattice of branches. The lattice had small purple flowers and was growing from a small plant pot. Anne felt confident it was an everlasting branch si
milar to the one Sassafras had shown them that morning.

  The clerk pointed to two men standing next to the blocked alcove, one younger and one considerably older. The older one was writing something on a notepad.

  “I have to return to the front counter,” said the clerk. “Those are the gentlemen you’ll need to speak to for permission to check out any of the exhibits in here. Best of luck!”

  The clerk left.

  The plan was for Anne, Penelope, and Hiro to distract any guards while Marri obtained the cylinder seal. The four approached the two men. Through the latticework, Anne could make out half a dozen display cases in the alcove. The first two stood empty with their glass doors open. Presumably they had held the medallion and the map. Other cases held jewels or outfits, and one at the end contained a small green object on a pedestal—the cylinder seal they were after.

  Anne cleared her throat.

  “This section has been sealed off,” said the older man without looking up.

  He and his partner wore identical dark overcoats over identical dark suits with identical crisp white shirts. In fact, the only discernible difference between them, besides their age, was the younger man’s bright pink shoes. Although there was no way for Anne to be certain, she got the sense from the way the older man was scribbling on his notepad that he greatly disapproved of those shoes.

  “We’d like to request access to one of the exhibits,” said Anne.

  The older man glanced at her and went back to writing. “It will have to wait.”

  “It’s very important.”

  “It will still have to wait.”

  “You’ll have to forgive him,” said the younger man. “He gets like this whenever we’re on a case.”

  The older man grunted.

  “Still, I’m afraid you really do need to leave,” the younger man continued. “We’re investigating yesterday’s robbery, so unless you have some valuable piece of information that could help us—”

  “Our friend was here yesterday,” Penelope blurted out. “Just before the robbery happened.”

  The older man lowered his notebook.

  “I’m Special Agent Bleakroot,” he said. He jabbed his thumb at the younger man. “This is Special Agent Evans.”

  The younger man smiled and waved. “Hi there.”

  Bleakroot gave the distinct impression that he wished Evans wouldn’t wave like that when he introduced him to people.

  “Are you with the Wizards’ Council?” asked Hiro.

  Bleakroot shook his head. “Different jurisdiction. We’re FDA.”

  Anne frowned. “FDA?”

  “The Faerie and Dragon Administration. Originally founded to deal with magickal creatures, but now also charged with enforcing the various laws and regulations pertaining to the use of magickal objects and public safety.” Bleakroot surveyed the group. “So, you were here yesterday, were you?”

  Marri cleared her throat. “Just me, actually. For several hours. I was studying one of the other medallions.”

  “Did you see anyone else enter the room?”

  “I saw several people,” she said brightly, clearly trying to get their interest.

  “Mind if I get a statement?”

  “Okay.”

  The agents led her across the room. As she went, Marri pointed to the display case beyond the lattice and made a shooing motion.

  Penelope nudged Anne. “I think she means you.”

  “Why me?” said Anne.

  “Because I’m way too loud and Hiro would probably pass out just thinking about it. This is our one chance to get that seal, and Marri obviously can’t do it now. Hiro and I will do our best to block their view.”

  “But that’s an everlasting branch across the front of the alcove,” said Anne. “Someone is going to have to make it create a door or something. I was the only one who couldn’t make it work in class.”

  “Well, now you get a second chance. And be quick about it, too, because the clock is ticking.” Penelope gave Anne a push. Anne stumbled but quickly recovered. Neither of the agents seemed to notice.

  Penelope was right. They didn’t have the luxury of time. Anne wandered about the room as though she were merely there to do some sightseeing. When she returned to the lattice, she glanced back to see whether anyone was looking in her direction. Penelope had dragged Hiro to a spot where they would at least partially shield Anne from view. The two agents seemed focused on Marri, who was gesturing wildly and seemed to be saying something about an ogre. If Anne was going to do this, it had to be now.

  Anne gripped one of the branches in her hand and willed it to make an opening. She squeezed her eyes shut and pictured an elegant archway. Nothing happened. She squeezed her eyes even tighter and imagined a grand oak door. Still nothing.

  “This is going to take forever,” she muttered to herself.

  She dug in her cloak for her pocketknife, figuring if nothing else she might be able to cut her way through. Suddenly the branches began to move, and a small circle formed in the center of the lattice.

  Anne rolled her eyes. “Great, a plant that only responds to threats.”

  The circle would be a tight fit, but Anne was certain she could make it. She put one leg through and then shoved her body after it. Tight didn’t begin to describe it. Her body became momentarily trapped, but after a couple of pushes her torso popped out like a cork. She fell on the floor. A quick glance back told her she was still in the clear. Penelope and Hiro had joined Marri and the two agents, and for some reason Penelope was pounding Hiro on the back as though to demonstrate something.

  Anne’s palms were sweaty, and she wiped them on her pants. She made her way to the first display case. A description on the side of the case read: “Herein lies the Darkflame Medallion, originally owned by Hieronymus Darkflame. A gift to him from the Lady of Glass. Acquired following his death in the Battle of the Great Rift.”

  Anne gasped when she read the part about the Lady of Glass. That was the person the dragon queen had told Anne to seek out, the one person who could tell her everything. Anne read the description twice more before moving on, just to make sure she would remember all the details. The next display case said much the same, except instead of “Darkflame Medallion” it read “a map of unknown tiers.”

  She knew her time was running short, so she made her way to the display case at the end. The description here read as the others did except it referred to the cylinder seal. Hands shaking, Anne pulled on the glass door. Much to her surprise, it opened easily. So much for museum security. She reached in and snatched the jade cylinder seal off its pedestal. Hardly believing her luck, she hurried back to the barrier and launched herself through in one go. The circle closed on her foot, momentarily trapping it, but she gave a deft twist and her foot popped out.

  Once safely out of the alcove, Anne risked a quick peek at the seal. It was barely two inches long. From a distance it had appeared to be uniform in color, but up close, she could see it was slightly marbled. Unfortunately, she couldn’t decipher any of the markings.

  “Hey, what are you doing there?” said Bleakroot.

  Anne jammed the seal into her pocket and hoped he hadn’t seen. If one of the agents noticed the cylinder seal was missing from the case, they would know for sure she had taken it.

  “Me? I was just admiring the exhibits,” said Anne as she tried to step casually over to one of the display cases in the middle of the room.

  Bleakroot scanned the lattice and the display cases for any obvious signs of tampering. Anne squeezed her eyes shut and waited for the inevitable accusation, but none came. The everlasting branch had completely closed, but surely he had spotted the missing seal.

  “That’s fine,” said Bleakroot. “Just make sure you don’t touch anything. Wait a minute, though.”

  Anne had started to walk away but froze in place.

  He peered at her curiously. “I’ve never seen anyone with yellow eyes before.”

  “Really?” said Anne. “Be
cause where I come from, everyone has them.”

  He grunted. “Interesting.”

  Then he resumed writing in his notebook.

  Anne was bewildered.

  How in the world had she not just been caught?

  She looked back at the display case. Much to her surprise, the cylinder seal was once again sitting on its pedestal. How could that be when she could still feel it in her pocket?

  “Attention, all museum patrons,” said a voice that sounded suspiciously sparrowlike. “Please proceed to the main lobby at this time for your free gift of—of—erm—maple-dipped bananas. And dried seaweed.”

  “You’d better hurry,” said Evans. “I hear those bananas go quickly.”

  “I’d steer clear of the seaweed, though,” said Bleakroot, rubbing his stomach.

  “Uh, right,” said Anne, and she and the others left the special collections room. When they reached the archway that led to the lobby, Marri stopped them.

  “We can’t leave without that cylinder seal,” she said.

  “I have it,” said Anne, and she dug the tiny jade seal out of her pocket and held it for everyone to see.

  “But it’s still in the display case,” said Hiro. “I noticed it as we left.”

  Jeffery appeared beside them in a flash of light. “That’s because I replaced it.”

  “Replaced it with what?” Anne asked suspiciously. “It’s not like there are a lot of extra jade cylinder seals lying around.”

  “Don’t worry. Someone left a moldy avocado in one of the other displays. I used that. Once you peel it, you can hardly tell the difference from a distance.”

  “How could you possibly peel it? That thing is practically petrified.”

  “I have a sharp beak.”

  Anne put her hands on her hips. “That wasn’t just any moldy old avocado, you know. It was one of the exhibits.”