Hooked on You

by Jenn Matthews

  She nodded.

  Thank goodness she’s not in one of my classes. “Well, you don’t need to call me ‘Miss’ here. ‘Anna’ is fine.” She indicated the cat head clutched in Amy’s hand. “He’s looking marvellous.”

  “Thanks, Mi—um. I mean, Anna.”

  “You been coming long?”

  Amy shrugged. “Couple of years. My mum used to come but she’s ill so…I look after her. But she can manage a couple of hours on her own in the evening, once a week.”

  “You’re a young carer?” Despite Anna’s insistence on informality between them, the teacher in her pushed through.

  “Yeah.”

  Anna nodded. “That’s a very grown-up thing to do.”

  “Anna, can I ask you something?” Amy’s cheeks reddened at using Anna’s first name.

  “So long as it isn’t advice about crochet, of course.”

  Amy giggled. “Do you think everyone should go to university?”

  “Hmm. Good question.” Anna tilted her head. “I think it depends what you want out of life, doesn’t it? If going to uni means you’ll get the degree you want, so you can do the job you want to do, then yes. But if you’re dream is to work as something that doesn’t require going to university, I think there’s really no need.” She smiled at Amy. “What do you think?”

  Amy perched on the edge of Anna’s table.

  “I agree. I think some people should and some people shouldn’t.” She bit her lip. “My dad thinks I should. But Mum says I should do whatever makes me happy.”

  “I think doing things that make you happy are very important.”

  “Me too. But what if I don’t go to uni and then I miss out? Like, with a degree, you have more choices, don’t you?”

  “You can go later. There’s nothing stopping you from seeing some of the world for a while first.”

  “I can’t afford to have a gap year.”

  “I don’t mean travelling,” Anna said gently. “If you’re not sure what job you’d like to do, you could try a few, see what floats your boat.”

  Amy brightened. “That’s a good idea.”

  “You doing A levels?”

  She nodded.

  “I expect you’ve chosen your subjects.”

  Another nod. Amy swung her legs back and forth a bit.

  “You have so much time to decide. I remember being your age and trying to figure out what to do. When I was young, you either became a secretary or a teacher. Guess which I chose?”

  Amy’s eyes sparkled. “A secretary?”

  “Indeed.” Anna laughed.

  “You like it, though?”

  “I do. Very much.”

  Amy pushed her shoulders up happily and then slipped from the table. She went back to her own table and sent Anna sparkly little smiles from her seat. Anna returned them. I hope she has enough support with her mum. She seems happy enough. She made a mental note to ask Mr Jones about her, make sure he knew about the young-carer thing.

  Busy with her hands in the sink washing up, Ollie didn’t seem to notice Anna’s lingering presence until Matthew swept past her and touched her arm. Ollie glanced over but finished washing up before turning around.

  “Nowhere to be?” Her voice was light and amused.

  “Not tonight. Timothy is at his girlfriend’s house and Bethany is, as usual, out.” Anna brought her mug over. “You didn’t have a drink.” She lifted Ollie’s mug—a brightly coloured thing with a rainbow across it—and held it out so Ollie could look inside.

  The mug was clean, and a dry tea bag sat at the bottom of it. Ollie frowned. “Um, it’s okay.”

  Anna put the mug down. It’s now or never. “Maybe I could buy you a coffee.” She lowered her lashes, one hand held out towards the door. “I’m sure that little greasy-spoon place round the corner is still open.”

  “I don’t think it ever closes, does it?” Ollie’s eyes seemed to be searching Anna’s.

  That wasn’t a rejection. Good. “Come on, then. I’ll wait for you to do whatever you need to do here.”

  “That would be…that would be great.”

  Anna waited outside while Ollie did the necessary routines to lock up the shop. When she came out, Anna was holding up a five-pound note. “And this time, you have to take it,” she said.

  Ollie stuffed it into her jeans pocket. “Fine. Twist my arm.”

  They walked down the darkened side street the shop stood on, crossed the road, and turned left onto the main street of shops.

  “I finished my squares,” Anna said.

  “Great.” Ollie smiled at her.

  A few people were hanging around outside the local pub or smoking outside their flats. The town was bustling, the halfway pleasant early evening coaxing people outside to chat.

  “Is there something you’d like to make next?”

  Anna paused and thought. “I liked the blanket Matthew was making. I’m not saying I could even attempt anything as complicated as that but…”

  “I’ll make you up the pattern.” As they approached the café, she held the door open, allowing Anna to go in first. “It’s simple enough. I’ve done it a few times, and it’s sort of tattooed onto my brain.”

  Anna found them a table. Once Ollie was seated, she sat across from her and clasped her hands tightly in her lap. What to say? She wanted to ask Ollie more about her past, but how to do it gracefully?

  The waitress took their orders and offered them free slices of cake, which Anna accepted but Ollie declined.

  “I try not to eat too late,” she explained. “Gives me a stomach ache.” She rested her forearms on the tabletop.

  Anna fished a napkin gingerly out of the holder and took a fork from the little pot. She lay them down carefully in front of her. She watched the cake being sliced and listened to the coffee machine whirring. Two men dressed in high-vis jackets and cement-smeared trousers made their way to the counter, paid, and left.

  Only a young couple remained in the café, behind their table. Their joined hands and lowered voices made it obvious what they were. They look like they’re on a date.

  She turned back to Ollie and kept her voice low when she spoke. “So, tell me about your family. Are you in touch with your children’s father or…?”

  Ollie’s lips pursed for a moment. “We communicate. Usually amicably. But we’ve been separated for nearly five years. Divorced for three.”

  They both leaned backwards as the waitress brought their drinks over.

  Once she was out of earshot, Anna asked, “Rough divorce?”

  With a glance at the couple behind them, Ollie replied, “Yes. Quite rough.” She sipped her coffee.

  Anna nodded. “You ended it?”

  “No. He did.” She sighed, then smiled weakly up at Anna. “You don’t want to know all the ins and outs…”

  “I do if you want to tell me.”

  The young couple giggled behind them. Anna shot them an annoyed look over her shoulder, wishing they were alone.

  As if they’d noticed, the couple gathered their things. They paid and walked out hand in hand. The waitress moved out the back, and the sound of cupboards opening and clinking china drifted through.

  “It’s part of the club.” Anna poked her Victoria sponge with her fork. “Angry ex-wives. Nothing you say leaves the room.”

  “Okay.” Ollie’s gaze swung away though.

  Perhaps she needs the distance.

  “I had been offered another ten years in the army, teaching in one of the new schools in Iraq. My ex wasn’t happy. Wanted me home. Kids missed me.”

  “Seems a little unfair. Was he not supportive of your career?”

  Ollie slid her hands around her coffee cup, looking into its depths. “After twenty years, you’d think he would have been. There was more, though. I was seriously h
urt in the explosion. Lots of recovery time at home. I wasn’t happy. And I’d…” Ollie sighed sadly and looked up at Anna. “I had done something very…awful. While I was in Iraq.”

  “What did you do?” Anna’s fingers twitched on the table.

  “There was…someone else. Someone I taught with. We got… We became intimate.”

  Anna ate some more cake but didn’t break eye contact with Ollie.

  Ollie looked away. “One of our mutual friends found out. He was working with us in Iraq and…he must have seen us. Sent my ex a letter, explaining my shortfalls. Awful, really.”

  “Were you in love?” Anna’s voice was close to a whisper.

  “At the time?” Ollie shrugged, but then, after a long moment, she nodded.

  “Well, usually I would say cheating was a definite no-no.” Anna’s fingertips touched Ollie’s knuckles where they wrapped around her coffee cup. She spoke slowly. “But I can tell from your expression it wasn’t something you did lightly, or without thought. Am I right?”

  Ollie nodded again. Her hand loosened from the mug.

  “Not like what my ex did to me,” Anna continued. “Any young TA that took his fancy. The pupils all knew. He never hid it.” She shook her head.

  “Canoodling at work?” Ollie’s knuckles tightened around her mug again.

  “Yep.”

  “What a tosser.”

  “Tell me about it.” Anna put her fingertips to her temple. “And the worst thing was my colleagues all told me he was playing away from home. I just shrugged it off. Then he royally buggered up, got caught by the Head shagging the cleaner in the storage room—clichéd, I know. Embarrassed me in front of everyone. I nearly killed him.” Her eyes burned at the memory.

  “If you still want to, I could probably find a guy.” Ollie’s lips were curling upwards.

  With a loud laugh, Anna squeezed her fingers, then removed her hand from Ollie’s. “That’s very sweet of you, but he’s my daughter’s father. They still see one another.”

  “At least my ex-husband was reasonably civil during the whole thing. Well, you know, considering. He was angry and hurt, of course.”

  “Of course.” She sipped her coffee. Why do I feel sorry for her? Ollie had cheated on her husband. That was usually on Anna’s list of unforgivable offences.

  “You’ve been practising hard.”

  She frowned in confusion. “Hmm?”

  “Crochet.” Ollie pointed at Anna’s forefinger where it curled around her mug. “You have a sore line here. You’re pulling the yarn over it too tightly.”

  Anna took her hand from her cup and looked at her forefinger. “Ah. Is that where I’m going wrong?”

  “I got the same thing when I first started. I remember feeling like I was going to drop everything if I didn’t hold on tight to it.”

  “Sounds familiar.” Anna rubbed her finger and grimaced.

  Ollie bent down to fumble in her bag. “I’m sure you have your own hand cream, but… Here. Try this.”

  Anna read the label on the small bottle. It seemed to contain nothing she was allergic to. She opened the cap and sniffed. Herb scents filled her nose and she felt the hairs standing up on the back of her neck. “That’s rather nice.”

  “Keep it.”

  “Oh no, I couldn’t.” Anna tried to give it back.

  “I buy in bulk. The chlorine in the water at the baths makes my skin sore. I teach swimming to kids. So I have about twenty bottles at home.”

  “I’m sure I can find some…”

  “Honestly, its fine. It’s good stuff, I promise.”

  Anna still held out the bottle, her gaze steady. Ollie took a deep breath and then grasped Anna’s fingers, pushing the bottle away.

  Her chivalry about it made Anna smile despite herself. “Fine. Thank you, Ollie.”

  “It’s got…rosemary and mint. Or something.” Ollie slotted her fingers together on the table again.

  After decanting some into her palm, Anna rubbed it in. “Thank you.” She slipped the bottle into her handbag.

  They sipped their coffees and Anna realised she didn’t have much of her cake left. When there was just a mouthful remaining, she took a clean fork from the pot and held it out, handle first, to Ollie. “It’s lovely cake. And I’m sure one mouthful won’t hurt.”

  Ollie looked at her for a few heartbeats. Was the cake question really that big a deal? But then she took the fork from Anna and scooped up the last piece. She pushed up her shoulders and hummed in pleasure.

  Suddenly aware of Ollie’s mouth, more specifically the way her tongue darted over her lips to lick away a stray crumb, Anna felt her stomach go fluttery—similar to when Liam kissed her but a lot more intense. Startled, she stared into her coffee mug and watched a small bubble float across the surface. She drank the remainder, before sighing as the warm liquid heated up her stomach and relaxed her.

  By the time she managed to look up again, she realised they’d both finished their coffees. So I suppose we’ll be leaving soon. Damn.

  “So, how’s the love life?” Strangely, it took a while for Ollie to look at her after saying that.

  “I’m currently dating a lovely health and safety officer called Liam,” she replied. “You?”

  There was a pause. “Free and single currently,” she said eventually.

  Anna waited for some kind of embellishment, but none came.

  “So ‘dating’, hmm?” Ollie continued, again not meeting Anna’s eye. “Serious? Or…” She made a vague waving gesture with her hand as if to fill the space of that sentence.

  “So far reasonably casual. I’m sure he’d like more though.”

  Ollie seemed to relax a touch. “I bet. Attractive woman with a great mind too.” She winked. “What’s not to like?”

  Anna’s smile broadened and she shuttered her eyes. She felt quite breathless for a moment. “There’s just one problem.”

  “Oh?”

  “A stupid one, really.” Anna rolled her eyes and leant an elbow on the table, her fingers combing through her own hair.

  “Do tell.”

  “Timothy. Liam isn’t comfortable with him.”

  “Your adopted son? Why not?” Ollie sat back in her chair, her arms folded across her chest and her eyebrows furrowed.

  Anna looked up from under her own wrist. “Liam is easily irritated by him. Timothy’s odd, he says odd things, does odd things. Liam can’t handle that.”

  “How long have you been together?”

  “Six…seven months.”

  “And he’s not suggested he’d like it to become more serious?” Ollie leant her head to one side.

  “Oh, he has. I’m the one who’s reluctant. What we have is comfortable and fun, and anything more wouldn’t work.”

  “Because of Timothy?”

  “Liam doesn’t stay over if Timothy’s at home. Which he usually is. And he complains when I have to leave early to make Timothy’s supper or… Timothy has a very strict routine and can’t deal with even the smallest change. He’s my priority—he and Bethany.”

  Ollie’s gaze on Anna was steady. “Do you think Liam would make you choose—between him and Timothy—if he wanted it to become more serious?”

  “He’s kind, kind to me at least. I don’t think he’d ask that sort of thing, which is a shame, actually.” Anna laughed. “If he did force me to choose, at least then I would know my answer.”

  Ollie nodded and looked into her empty coffee cup. She cleared her throat and poked the cup away from herself with her fingertips. She seemed unsure what to say next.

  “Until things change, casual is fine,” Anna said more to fill the silence than because she thought it needed saying. “I don’t mind getting some of my needs met at the sacrifice of the rest.” She blinked and realised how her words had sounded.

 
Ollie leant forward, chin in her hand. “He’s all right in the sack, then.”

  It wasn’t a question. Anna laid her palm against her hot face, and her gaze slid away from Ollie’s. She rubbed at the back of her neck.

  “There’s nothing wrong with fun,” Ollie said. “I suppose it depends what you’re looking for.”

  “I suppose it does.”

  “Are you looking for anything more?”

  “I have no idea.” Anna lifted her eyes to Ollie’s again.

  “Well, anyway.” Ollie stood and moved towards the counter. “I’ll get this.”

  “No, don’t be silly. It was my idea.” She grabbed her purse from her bag and joined Ollie.

  “It’s fine.”

  She was so kind and gentle with the crochet class. Who knew she had this stubborn streak? “Honestly, Ollie.”

  “All right, then. How about we split it?”

  It wasn’t how she’d intended this to go. But it was a compromise she could live with, she supposed. “Okay.”

  The waitress arrived, and they tumbled identical coins onto the countertop.

  Anna pulled her coat close around her middle as they left. “Where do you live?” she asked as they weaved around groups of people outside the nearby pub. Music thrummed from inside, the orange glow from the electric lights spilling out onto the street.

  “I have a flat above the shop. You?”

  “Parson Street. Liam dropped me off, so I’m getting a taxi home.”

  “Ah.”

  The shop was on the way to the taxi rank, and it was early enough that Anna didn’t think she’d have any trouble just flagging one down. Ollie stopped when they reached the side door.

  Anna held her hand out to Ollie. She felt very aware of the cold breeze brushing her fingers. Ollie grasped Anna’s hand in her own.

  “Same time next week?” Ollie asked.

  “You don’t get rid of me that easily.”

  A group of people passing behind them forced Anna to step up close enough to Ollie that the fronts of their coats brushed. Ollie reached for her waist as the group passed them. It made Anna warm all over, despite the early winter chill.

  When the group of people were clear, Anna did not move away. The single inch difference in their heights seemed huge. She held her breath as Ollie gazed down at her. She wasn’t sure, but she thought she saw Ollie’s gaze flick down to her lips, then back up. Suddenly feeling shivery, she swallowed and stepped back.