“I don’t want to see her get hurt either…” Jake pauses for a moment, glaring at my brother…
“You’re not the only one who cares about her.” Jake almost yells the words, while pointing his finger at Eli.
“If you care so much about my sister,” Eli argues, “make sure this doesn’t happen again. Or else.” As soon as the words or else leave Eli’s lips, he gives Jake a shove, and I know it‘s going to come to blows between the two men I care most about.
I care about Jake? I ask myself, shocked that I even admitted it to myself. I know it’s the sanctity of my own mind, but even thinking those words are enormous.
Thoughts begin to buzz through my head at massive speed, and I jump off the desk in reaction.
“Hey. I’m right here,” I demand as I slip between them, putting my left hand on Jakes chest, and my right on Eli’s.
By now, Shawn is standing too. He has his arm across my brother’s collar bone, like a bar holding him back from disaster.
“Eli, will you please sit down?” Mar pleads, as she stands up beside him, gently putting her hand on his arm. I have never heard her speak to him in this way, and she moves towards him like one might move towards a wild beast.
He glares at her for a moment, like he is angry at her for reprimanding him, but then his face goes slack, and he backs up, allowing her to guide him.
I still have my hand on Jake’s chest… As if my strength could actually stop him if he wanted to get past me.
I can feel his heart beat under my palm.
It’s fast, yet even.
Mar and Shawn get my brother to sit down, and I gently push Jake back against the desk. He is still staring at Eli, intensely.
“Please sit,” I whisper.
Surprisingly, Jake does as I ask and he inches back onto the desk top. I stand in front of him with my hands firm on his arms, just in case.
After a good sixty seconds of me standing there, I back off, moving to the middle of the room, stopping purposely in between the couch and desk.
“You can’t fight like this,” I say sternly. “We all have to be here, and we all need each other, and…” I look at Eli and point at him. “You can’t get all defensive just because someone other than you says they care for me, and wants to protect me… Got it?”
He nods, and I turn to look at Jake. He has a… she told you grin on his face.
“And you…” I say pointing at him, allowing my eyes to show my anger. “Eli is my brother, and no matter what… he’s going to be around so… if you care for me like you say you do… you have to at least tolerate my family.”
“I‘ll try,” whispers Jake, looking considerably calmer than a minute ago.
“Ok,” I whisper back. “That would mean a lot to me.”
My head is buzzing and feels cloudy, but I just chalk that up to being ridiculously full of adrenaline, and let the worry pass from my mind. It’s obvious that my brother cares about me, after all, he is my brother. Mar and I care for each other as friends, and our mutual love and respect for one another is always present.
I am glad that they at least have one another to rely on. At whatever level their relationship is at currently, their affection towards each other, at least, takes some of the attention off of me…
Not nearly enough, though.
I can handle me being hurt physically and even torn apart mentally, but when it comes to them…
I look around the room, first at Eli, then to Mar, Shawn, and lastly, my gaze falls on Jake. It’s just about all I can bare to see it happening to them.
I thought I would always have the same list of people that I care for and love, with no apparent diversion from that list. I had even become acquainted with the idea that I might never attract the affection of someone other than those who had no choice but to love me. I thought I was actually ok with that… until I came here, that is.
Recently though, there seems to be an ever-growing collection of people added to that list.
My family has always been on there, but since induction into this dark and confusing new world I seem to be a part of, I have added a few people.
Sweet Syl. She seemed to young and innocent to end up in a room of so-called fighters years older than her. I can’t imagine her not being a part of our Strong little family, though.
Then there’s Zac, who I have always cared for because he was my best friends brother, but now it’s far more than that. He saved the girls lives, and even though he doesn’t see it, he protects them every day.
And Shawn, who had such a messed-up life before, that induction seemed to be a safe haven for him. His demeanor has gone from unassuming quiet nobody, to that of someone who couldn’t care less what others think as long as those that he has grown to love are safe.
He still can’t bring himself to talk about life before The Force, we don’t ask either.
Also, Samantha, who at first I thought would have never made the list, but she has proven herself to me. I don’t know that I like her, but I respect her.
And then, ultimately, Jake. Now we have both expressed that we have feelings for each other, but at the moment, he is just sitting here, palms resting on the desk, muscles flexed ever so slightly, looking at the floor between his boots.
I can’t help but think about how gorgeous he is. What is he thinking right now?
We have all been sitting awkwardly quietly for so long, that I have to break the silence. I feel like screaming from the pressure that has built up in my head over the last few minutes, but I know that now is not the time.
“If I can’t get people to take me seriously now, how will I get respect from them if I phase up, or if I complete the phases all together?” I ask
There is an unnerving moment of silence before Jake speaks.
“I don’t think that it’s taking you serious that’s the problem.”
“Then what?” I ask, frustrated.
“It’s that you’re showing them up,” Shawn interjects.
“He’s right,” says Jake.
“How am I doing that?” I say. “I don’t even talk to them. It’s like I have a target on my back.”
“You do,” Jake stands up, and puts his hand firmly on my upper arm. “It’s not on your back though… It’s right here.” He taps his fingers on my arm band.
Eli stands up again, and I hold my breath, but he just walks over to where Jake and I are standing.
I exhale.
“If I ask you a question,” my brother begins. “Will you answer it honestly?” He looks at Jake.
“Sure… If I can.”
“You went through the phases and survived, right?”
“Right,” Jake laughs, nodding his head.
Shawn and Mar stand up and join the conversation.
“Mar and I were talking,” Eli starts. “And she was wondering -”
“What are my chances of making it through the phases?” Mar bursts out. “I mean, I know I’m little, weak, and I’m sure not fast… But… Yeah.”
She trailed off, sounding shy and ashamed for being worried about such things.
“Honestly,” Jake says. “Your chances aren’t that great at the moment.”
Mar looks down, and Eli puts his hand under her chin, pulling her to eye level.
“But you can improve,” Eli whispers. “Isn’t that right, Jake? She can improve.”
“Yeah, she has the chance to try,” Jake says, but he doesn’t sound convincing.
We all walk out of the room to head to lunch. At the last second before we enter the dining hall, Jake grabs my wrist holding me back.
“I’ll be right in,” I say, to Eli, Mar, and Shawn.
Eli nods his head. “Ok.” Then they all three walk in, letting the door close behind them.
“What is it?” I ask Jake.
“I just wanted to be alone with you for a minute… Come with me, please.”
I nod.
We only go a few steps down the hall before we turn to the right, the
n go about thirty feet down that hall before stopping. Jake side steps into an un-lit doorway, pulling me with him.
“I do like you a lot, Liz Strong,” Jake says as he grabs my waste.
My ribcage blazes with the pain of his touch, but I don’t let it show on my face.
“And I like you, Jake… Whatever your real last name is,” I smile, and put my hands on his muscular arms.
He pulls me close to him, and I tense up, from the pain… And from my insecurities.
Can he feel how un-perfect my body is? Does he care?
We stand there. My hands on his arms, his hands on my ribs, no distance between us, gazing into each other’s eyes.
“Liz,” Jake whispers. “Can I kiss you?”
I nod. “But I might be bad at it,” I whisper.
He smiles as he fits a hand behind my neck and pulls me closer to him. My heart races as his lips touch mine, soft at first, but firm as the kiss goes on.
“You could never be bad at anything,” Jake says softly.
And then we kiss again.
Chapter Nineteen
A few minutes later, I walk into the dining hall, and sit down at the table with my little family group.
Mar and Eli sit close to each other, no room between them, elbows bumping while they eat. Shawn and Zac are talking about phase rankings or something, while pointing out various ranks in the room. Syl and Shae are eating their food, but I notice they are not acting themselves.
“What’s going on?” I ask.
“I don’t know, my head hurts a little and it feels cloudy,” Shae says quietly.
“Me too,” says Syl. “But mine is more of a constant buzzing sound going through my head.”
“Maybe we just need some rest,” Zac interjects into our conversation. “I have felt that way for two days now.
I noticed as I looked around the room, that the majority of the people in here have their heads slumped over or are rubbing their foreheads and temples in one way or another.
Those who have been at the complex for a while don’t seem to be doing this, but those of us who just came in seem defeated.
I tried to pass my own fuzzy head off earlier as being adrenaline or something, but the rush is gone, and my head still feels odd. I look around the room, looking for Jake, but I remember he was going to go try to talk to the Captain.
“Remind me to mention this to Jake. Maybe he might have an idea about what‘s going on,” I say to Shawn and Eli, who are also noticing the dark and dim looks on everyone’s faces.
“Will do,” Shawn says.
He’s not acting right either. His speech is off, and his eyes are red.
“Are you ok?” I ask him.
“I think so… Why?”
“You just look different,” I say.
“Well so do you, girlie,” Shawn says, flicking at my shoulder. “Your face all bruised and stuff.”
I laugh.
I had forgotten about my bruised face. How could Jake even look at me? Let alone kiss me.
I feel disgusting all of a sudden.
After we finish eating, we go back to boot camp. Jake is nowhere to be found, but Samantha is doing a great job of keeping Malachi, Levi, and Sampson at bay.
She has us doing sprints… Girls against Guys, but she never puts me or Mar up against them.
“Next up… Shawn, Eli, Mar, and Liz,” Samantha says, reading off her list.
We all line up. I know how this will end. Shawn or Eli in first, then me, then Mar, and I feel bad for her.
We take off sprinting. This is the third time I have done this since lunch. We start at the LAP line by the rock wall, and we have to make it back to that line to equal a sprint.
That’s a quarter of a mile, and even though it’s not a lot… I am worn out and in pain.
“Go,” Samantha shouts, looking at her stop watch.
We take off running, and it occurs just like I thought. Eli first, Shawn second, and Mar dead last.
After three more hours of sprints, we are dismissed to go to the dorms and get ready for dinner.
Still no Jake.
I get in the shower, my head is hurting so bad, I just lay it against the shower wall and let the water run over my temples. My body feels weird too, almost heavy.
After I get out of the shower, I walk back in the direction of the dorm, arms full of dirty clothes, wet hair dangling down my back, and dizzy as can be.
“Hey,” Jake calls from around the corner.
I maneuver around the corner, and he is standing there with a huge smile on his face.
“I got some good news,” he says.
“Yeah?” I say, trying not to sound spacey.
“Can I come get you tonight?” he whispers, as he leans against the wall.
“Sure, there’s something I want to talk to you about too, I can‘t remember what it was at the moment, but maybe I will remember by then.”
“I’ll come get you at 11:30,” he says with a smile, then he turns and walked away.
Dinner time came and went. I stay in the dorms for one, because I wasn’t hungry and for two, my head is killing me so bad, making it hard to stand up. My vision is blurry from time to time now, and I’m not sure what’s going on.
I’m not the only one who‘s not going to dinner. Chris is laying on his cot across the room with his pillow over his head. Mar is asleep next to me; she has been since she got out of the shower, two hours ago.
There are five others in the room, laying on their cots in various degrees of sleep.
Finally, I fall asleep too.
I wake with Jake shaking me. The lights are out in the dorm. I must have been asleep for almost five hours.
My head feels no better, even after sleeping for so long. It takes me a while to get to my feet, and even then, Jake has to help me.
“What’s wrong?” Jake whispers almost so low I can‘t hear him.
We are still in the dorm, and he doesn’t want to wake anyone up.
“Not sure,” I say with a slur. “Just tired maybe.”
Under my own power, I manage to hobble out of the room with Jake, him thanking the guard as we walk out.
We get about twenty feet from the door when I can’t walk anymore.
“Jake.” I say, as I fall backwards.
He catches me, just seconds before I hit the ground.
“Can’t move,” I barely get the words out.
I can feel my eyes rolling to the back of my head, as I try to fight the feeling of doom.
Jake is carrying me again I know he is.
*****
I come to, laying in the middle of a large bed… I feel cool air on my face. I look up, and a large fan with large blades circulates above head.
It’s daylight, and I don’t know how I got… Wherever I am.
I try to move, but my strength is all gone.
My body feels like it has been at war with my muscles, and my body won.
I look around the room. It is a somewhat large open space with a small two-person couch and non-matching chair sitting across from the bed. In the corner is a makeshift kitchen with a coffee pot and small stove, there is a small bathroom in the other corner.
I hear a noise from the other side of me and try to roll on my side to see where it came from. It takes me a long time to do so. Not like the last time when my ribs were bruised, but like my body forgot how to function.
In a chair at the bottom corner of the bed, Jake sits asleep. He’s half leaning against the back of the chair, and half slung over the side of it. His head tilted back his feet propped on the foot of the bed.
He is wearing the shorts and t-shirt combo again… which I think looks great on him.
He begins to stir and looks at me sleepy eyed for a minute.
“Liz,” he says, groggy at first, but then, he jumps out of his chair and practically wraps me in him, checking my eyes for alertness.
He looks relieved, which makes me feel confused and worried at the same time.
> “What’s wrong?” I ask, still dazed.
“Liz, you’ve been unconscious for three days.”
“Unconscious?” I wheeze through half breaths. “For three days? What’s wrong with me?”
I hadn’t noticed that it took the wind out of me just to roll over. He looks serious at me, with an expression of sorrow in his eyes.
“What is it?” I barely get out.
“There’s been something horrible happen. We have tested all of the new members of our complex and…” he pauses for a moment.
“And,” I say.
“And… It turns out that The Elected has been giving doses of a drug called Methrodine to all members of the Corridors between the ages of eight and twenty-two. Each month at check in, they give all members an injection, correct?”
I nod and try to pull myself up in the bed, but Jake ends up helping me.
“What has happened is, the injections given to those under eight and older than twenty-two are just a solution of salt and water. Everyone between those ages are more likely to be brought here… So, in order to make things harder on us… the Methrodine has been added to the injections given to those most likely to be taken by The Force. It is likely they have only been injecting the people with the actual drug for nine to eleven months. This is the first time anything like this has happened here at The Force.”
“What does… Methrodine do?” I ask, still very weak.
“It is a hyper active, genetically modified version of a drug that has been around for years… Its original form was called Methamphetamine. People use to shoot this… Meth… into their veins, giving them a rush and a nasty addiction.”
“So… I’m addicted?” I ask.
“No… you’ree dependent,” Jake answers, running a hand through my unwashed hair.
“Dependent?”
“Yes,” he says, quietly. “A dependency, is far worse than an addiction in this case. Because it is a modified version of the original drug, it means that your body now has to have some measure of this drug to survive.”
I let the information of the past few minutes sink in. I’m almost positive that I will throw up. I hold my stomach because it twists inside of me.
The Force (Fighting Freedom Book 1) Page 10
