Kill Sleep Repeat: A Psychological Thriller

by Britney King

  “It is equally a problem if you let go too soon.”

  There is a roar of laughter in the corner of the cafe. “Your favor has been repaid,” Carlo remarks. “Ian Miller is dead. I can sleep at night.”

  “That’s the problem with favors,” I say to him, every bit for Sophie’s benefit. “Eventually, you have to pay them back.”

  “He killed my daughter,” he says to Sophie, who is both unaware and unconcerned by the fact that we seem to be talking circles around her. “She was younger than you are now.”

  Snow has begun to fall in the street. I stare out at it for a long time and think of Michael. “You won’t sleep,” I say to Carlo.

  He looks at me knowingly. “You are right. It is never enough.”

  “So this list,” Sophie mentions. “The one my mother is always talking about…you’ve seen it?”

  “The kill list.”

  Sophie shrugs. “Sure.”

  “No,” he says, glancing at me. “I’m afraid that is all your mother.”

  At the counter of a cafe on Rue du Marché in Zurich, I stand in line, waiting to place an order for two coffees and a pastry for Sophie. The line is long, and the doors to the shop open so frequently that the cold air from the street continuously spills in. The line snakes itself around a giant fireplace, which I use to warm my hands.

  Outside, it has begun to drizzle. It comes down in waves, the kind of steady downfall you know is bound to turn into heavy rain. Later it will snow. I text Hayley back home. She has a dance recital tomorrow, and Michael’s mother is helping her get ready. I tell her I am sad to miss it. She promises to send a video.

  “It’s nice, isn’t it?” the voice in front of me says. I don’t realize at first that he is speaking to me until he repeats a version of the question, and I recognize the accent as decidedly American. “It’s not usually this busy,” he says. “Must be the rain. And the holidays.”

  I respond with a tight smile.

  “You’re American, also, no?”

  Another smile.

  “You can always tell.”

  “Is that right?”

  “Maybe just wishful thinking…makes it feel a little less lonely. Being so far from home.”

  “Home is where you make it, I think.”

  He seems surprised for a moment, but he doesn’t say anything, and he doesn’t let on why.

  “I’m John,” he says, extending his hand.

  I know who you are. I smile and place my hand in his. You’re number four on the list. “Olivia.”

  Later in his apartment, he builds a fire, and we lay naked, curled in front of it. The flames are warm and inviting, but also dangerous. He nuzzles my ear, and I think of the knife in my purse. The coolness of the blade, the firmness of its handle. It reminds me of him, in a way. Smooth and necessary.

  “Can you stay?”

  Staring at the fire, I think about his question, about what he is really asking. He is handsome, and a gentleman, and the best lay I’ve had in a very long time. He could be useful, so I say, “For a little while.”

  “Do you have a fireplace back home, Olivia?”

  “No,” I tell him. “And I’ve missed it my whole life.”

  A note from Britney

  Dear Reader,

  I hope you enjoyed reading Kill, Sleep, Repeat.

  Writing a book is an interesting adventure, it’s a bit like inviting people into your brain to rummage around. Look where my imagination took me. These are the kinds of stories I like…

  That feeling is often intense and unforgettable. And mostly, a ton of fun.

  With that in mind—thank you again for reading my work. I don’t have the backing or the advertising dollars of big publishing, but hopefully I have something better… readers who like the same kind of stories I do. If you are one of them, please share with your friends and consider helping out by doing one (or all) of these quick things:

  1. Visit my review page and write a 30 second review (even short ones make a big difference).

  Many readers don’t realize what a difference reviews make but they make ALL the difference.

  2. Drop me an email and let me know you left a review. This way I can enter you into my monthly drawing for signed paperback copies.

  3. Point your psychological thriller loving friends to their free copies of my work. My favorite friends are those who introduce me to books I might like.

  4. If you’d like to make sure you don’t miss anything, to receive an email whenever I release a new title, sign up for my new release newsletter.

  Thanks for helping, and for reading my work. It means a lot.

  Britney King

  Austin, Texas

  January 2020

  About The Author

  Britney King lives in Austin, Texas with her husband, children, a dog named Gatsby, one ridiculous cat, and a partridge in a peach tree.

  When she's not wrangling the things mentioned above, she writes psychological, domestic and romantic thrillers set in suburbia.

  Without a doubt, she thinks connecting with readers is the best part of this gig. You can find Britney online here:

  • britneyking.com

  • Email

  • Facebook

  • Instagram

  • Goodreads

  • BookBub

  Acknowledgments

  Many thanks to my family and friends for the endless inspiration and for your support in my creative endeavors.

  To the beta team, ARC team, and the bloggers. You make this gig a blast.

  Last, but certainly not least, I’d like to thank you for reading this. If not for you, I’d have to get what a couple of family members (who shall remain nameless) like to call a “real job.” :)

  Thank you for making this dream of mine come true.

  I appreciate you.

  Also by Britney King

  Room 553

  Room 553 is a standalone psychological thriller. Vivid and sensual, Room 553 weaves a story of cruelty, reckless lust, and blind, bloody justice.

  HER

  HER is a standalone psychological thriller which covers the dark side of female relationships. But equally—it’s about every relationship anyone has ever had they knew was terrible for them. It’s for those of us who swam for the deep end anyway, treading water because it seemed like more fun than sitting on the sidelines. It’s about the lessons learned along the way. And knowing better the next time. Or not.

  The Social Affair | Book One

  The Replacement Wife | Book Two

  Speak of the Devil | Book Three

  The New Hope Series Box Set

  The New Hope Series offers gripping, twisted, furiously clever reads that demand your attention, and keep you guessing until the very end. For fans of the anti-heroine and stories told in unorthodox ways, The New Hope Series delivers us the perfect dark and provocative villain. The only question—who is it?

  Water Under The Bridge | Book One

  Dead In The Water | Book Two

  Come Hell or High Water | Book Three

  The Water Series Box Set

  The Water Trilogy follows the shady love story of unconventional married couple—he’s an assassin—she kills for fun. It has been compared to a crazier book version of Mr. and Mrs. Smith. Also, Dexter.

  Bedrock | Book One

  Breaking Bedrock | Book Two

  Beyond Bedrock | Book Three

  The Bedrock Series Box Set

  The Bedrock Series features an unlikely heroine who should have known better. Turns out, she didn’t. Thus she finds herself tangled in a messy, dangerous, forbidden love story and face-to-face with a madman hell-bent on revenge. The series has been compared to Fatal Attraction, Single White Female, and Basic Instinct.

  Around The Bend

  Around The Bend, is a heart-pounding standalone which traces the journey of a well-to-do suburban housewife, and her life as it unravels, thanks to the secrets she keeps. If she were the only one with things she wanted
to keep hidden, then maybe it wouldn’t have turned out so bad. But she wasn’t.

  Somewhere With You | Book One

  Anywhere With You | Book Two

  The With You Series Box Set

  The With You Series at its core is a deep love story about unlikely friends who travel the world; trying to find themselves, together and apart. Packed with drama and adventure along with a heavy dose of suspense, it has been compared to The Secret Life of Walter Mitty and Love, Rosie.

  GET EXCLUSIVE MATERIAL

  Looking for a bit of dark humor, chilling deception and enough suspense to keep you glued to the page? If so, tap the image to receive your starter library. Easy peasy.

  Sneak Peek: The Social Affair

  Book One

  In the tradition of Gone Girl and Behind Closed Doors comes a gripping, twisted, furiously clever read that demands your attention, and keeps you guessing until the very end. For fans of the anti-heroine and stories told in unorthodox ways, The Social Affair delivers us the perfect dark and provocative villain. The only question—who is it?

  A timeless, perfect couple waltzes into the small coffee shop where Izzy Lewis works. Instantly enamored, she does what she always does in situations like these: she searches them out on social media.

  Just like that—with the tap of a screen— she’s given a front row seat to the Dunns’ picturesque life. This time, she’s certain she’s found what she’s been searching for. This time, she'll go to whatever lengths it takes to ensure she gets it right—even if this means doing the unthinkable.

  Intense and original, The Social Affair is a disturbing psychological thriller that explores what can happen when privacy is traded for convenience.

  What readers are saying:

  "Another amazingly well-written novel by Britney King. It's every bit as dark, twisted and mind twisting as Water Under The Bridge...maybe even a little more so."

  "Hands down- best book by Britney King. Yet. She has delivered a difficult writing style so perfectly and effortlessly, that you just want to worship the book for the writing. The author has managed to make murder/assassination/accidental- gunshot- to-the-head- look easy. Necessary."

  "Having fallen completely head over heels for these characters and this author with the first book in the series, I've been pretty much salivating over the thought of this book for months now. You'll be glad to know that it did not disappoint!"

  Praise

  "If Tarantino were a woman and wrote novels... they might read a bit like this."

  "Fans of Gillian Flynn and Paula Hawkins meet your next obsession."

  "Provocative and scary."

  "A dark and edgy page-turner. What every good thriller is made of."

  "I devoured this novel in a single sitting, absolutely enthralled by the storyline. The suspense was clever and unrelenting!"

  "Completely original and complex."

  "Compulsive and fun."

  "No-holds-barred villains. Fine storytelling full of mystery and suspense."

  "Fresh and breathtaking insight into the darkest corners of the human psyche."

  The Social Affair

  Britney King

  Copyright

  THE SOCIAL AFFAIR is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, images, and incidents are products of the author's imagination or are used fictitiously and are not to be construed as real. Any resemblance to actual events, locales, organizations, persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental and not intended by the author. The scanning, uploading, and distribution of this book without permission is a theft of the author's intellectual property. No part of this publication may be used, shared or reproduced in any manner whatsoever without written permission except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews. If you would like permission to use material from the book (other than for review purposes), please contact https://britneyking.com/contact/

  Thank you for your support of the author's rights

  Hot Banana Press

  Cover Design by Britney King LLC

  Cover Image by Mario Azzi

  Copy Editing by Librum Artis Editorial Services

  Proofread by Proofreading by the Page

  Copyright © 2018 by Britney King LLC. All Rights Reserved.

  First Edition: 2018

  ISBN 13: 978-1979057455

  ISBN 10: 1979057451

  britneyking.com

  To those who’ve walked into our lives without first asking permission...

  Prologue

  Attachment is an awfully hard thing to break. I should know. I surface from the depths of sleep to complete and utter darkness. I don’t want to open my eyes. I have to. “I warned you, and I warned you,” I hear his voice say. It’s not the first time. He called out to me, speaking from the edge of consciousness, back when I thought this all might have been a dream. It’s too late for wishful thinking now. This is his angry voice, the one I best try to avoid. My mind places it immediately. This one is reserved for special occasions, the worst of times.

  I hear water running in the background. Or at least I think I do. For my sake, I hope I'm wrong. I try to recall what I was doing before, but this isn't that kind of sleep. It's the heavy kind, the kind you wake from and hardly know what year you’re in, much less anything else. I consider how much time might have passed since I dozed off. Then it hits me.

  “You really shouldn’t have done that,” he says, and his eyes come into focus. Those eyes, there’s so much history in them; it’s all still there now. I see it reflected back to me. I read a quote once that said… a true mark of maturity is when someone hurts you, and you try to understand their situation instead of trying to hurt them back. This seems idealistic now. I wish someone had warned me. Enough of that kind of thinking will get you killed.

  “Please,” I murmur, but the rest of what I want to say won’t come. It’s probably better this way. I glance toward the door, thinking about what’s at stake if I don’t make it out of here alive, wondering whether or not I can make a break for it. It’s so dark out—a clear night, a moonless sky. The power is out, I gather, and it’s a fair assumption. This has always been one of his favorite ways to show me what true suffering is like. That alone would make an escape difficult. I would have to set out on foot and then where would I go? Who would believe me?

  “You have it too easy,” he says, as though he wants to confirm my suspicions. “That’s the problem nowadays. People consume everything, appreciate nothing.”

  He lifts me by the hair and drags me across the bedroom. I don’t have to ask why. He doesn’t like to argue where he sleeps, where we make love. It’s one of our safe spaces, but like many things, this too is a facade. Nothing with him is safe.

  “You like your comforts, but you forget nothing good comes without sacrifice.”

  “I haven’t forgotten,” I assure him, and that much is true. Sacrifice is something I know well.

  He shakes his head, careful to exaggerate his movements. He wants the message he sends to sink in. “I don’t know why you have to make me so angry.”

  I glance toward the window, thinking I see headlights, but it’s wishful thinking. Then I reach up and touch the wet spot at the crown of my head. I pull my hand away, regretful I felt the need for confirmation. Instinct is enough. If only I’d realized this sooner. I didn’t have to put my fingers to it to know there would be blood; the coppery scent fills the air. “It’s not too bad,” he huffs as he slides one hand under my armpit and hauls me up. “Come on,” he presses, his fingertips digging into my skin. “Let’s get you stitched up.”

  I follow his lead. There isn’t another option. Head wounds bleed a lot, and someone’s going to have to clean his mess up. If I live, that someone will be me. This is how you stop the bleeding. “What time is it?”

  “Oh,” he says, half-chuckling. “There’s no need to worry about that. She’s already come and gone.”

  I don’t ask who he’s referring to. I know. Everything in m
e sinks to the pit of my stomach. It rests there and I let it. I don’t want him to see how deeply I am affected by what he’s done. It’s more dangerous if I let it show. But what I want to happen and what actually does, are two very different things. I know because my body tenses, as it gives over to emotion until eventually it seizes up completely. I don’t mean for it to happen. It has a habit of betraying me, particularly where he is concerned. Your mind may know when something's bad for you. But the body can take a little longer. He knows where to touch me. He knows what to say. Automatic response is powerful, and like I said before, attachment is hard to break.