Love Me, Lauren

by Elle Linder

  After a vigorous workout and a lively rendition of her orgasmic song, Julia collapsed on Luke’s chest. It was right then, at a vulnerable moment, when it hit her square in the face that it wasn’t fair to put him off any longer.

  In her heart, she knew the date she would become Mrs. Luke Hamill. Her quirky, perfectionistic brain had already settled on October nineteenth—nine months after she’d met him. She had even gone as far as to block out the entire weekend on the resort’s event calendar, along with several suites. Then there was the secret Pinterest board she’d created months ago and filled with images of cakes, floral arrangements, hairstyles, invitations, and dresses. There were various color palettes she had yet to settle on, clothing ideas for Heather, Brice, and Izzy, tons of decorations using logs, naturally, and lighting ideas for her woodland fantasy.

  She had been planning their wedding for months, and Luke didn’t have a clue.

  It seemed the time had come to share, at the very least, the date with him. “October nineteenth,” she whispered, then kissed the Semper Fi tattoo on his chest. Always faithful. She loved that he had the words that meant everything to her tattooed on his chest, and why wouldn’t he? They meant everything to him as well.

  Luke squeezed her tightly, pressing his lips to her temple. “So, in three months, we’ll promise to love, honor, and—”

  “Not obey,” Julia blurted vehemently. Luke laughed the laugh. It instantly made her giddy inside, knowing he rarely laughed heartily for anyone else. She brought it out of him because he was so damn happy with her. “Luke, seriously.” She propped herself up on his chest with an annoyed but playful expression and covered his mouth with her hand as he continued to laugh. “I will not promise to obey you.”

  “Baby, you didn’t let me finish,” he mumbled through her hand.

  “Then finish.” She uncovered his mouth.

  “We’ll promise to love, honor…and respect each other.” He cupped her face, and in his twinkling eyes, it was there: adoration. “Thank you for setting a date. When should we tell the kids? And what about the ring? And when will you move back into the lake house?”

  “I’ll put the ring back on today, but let’s not talk about the wedding until after Brice’s birthday. I want to get through the party before Renee finds out. I can only take so much of her. And moving back in…” She paused, grimacing. She didn’t want to hurt him. “I don’t know yet. Give me a little more time on that.”

  “Okay, baby. You are a remarkable woman. I’ll do whatever you want.”

  “All I want is you, Luke.”

  ***

  Gone were the days of lingering under the sheets on a Sunday morning. Or staying in bed all day, only breaking for water or a quick bite. Julia missed having Luke all to herself. Maybe it would be different if they lived together? Then her moans of ecstasy played in her head and she shuddered, recalling when Brice had bounded into Luke’s bedroom back in March as Luke rode her hard.

  She sighed wistfully, missing when it had only been the two of them. Now they had their slumber party, as Luke liked to call it, on Fridays and two-hour pockets of time throughout the week before Luke’s phone started pinging with texts from Brice. One by one they would come, like now.

  Brice: When are you coming home?

  Brice: Can we go hiking and maybe fishing today?

  Brice: What’s for dinner?

  Brice: I love you, Dad.

  Brice: And Julia, too.

  With each text Brice sent, Julia could hear his sweet voice saying the words. His blond hair, ocean-blue eyes, and spunky personality reminded her of Lauren. She couldn’t wait for them to finally meet.

  Julia’s heart ached thinking of her bestie in L.A. all alone. Lauren had never made friends easily. Her morbid, wiseass, know-it-all attitude turned a lot of people off. If only they would give her a chance, they would see the beautiful, kind, loving side of her. Lucky was the person who had Lauren, a fierce and loyal protector, in their corner.

  Over the last few months, Julia had developed close friendships with Erika, Kandace, and Tami, but none of them were Lauren. She needed her best friend, and three days during Brice’s birthday weekend wouldn’t be enough time for Julia. Especially now that she needed to find a wedding dress.

  Julia let out a woeful sigh as Luke exited the bathroom.

  “What’s the matter, baby?”

  “Brice texted you.” She jerked her chin toward his phone.

  “Not that. What was your sad little sigh about?”

  “Oh, that.” She shrugged. “I miss Lauren, that’s all.”

  “Four more days, sweetheart, and she’ll be here. Think she can babysit?” He wiggled his brows.

  “Luke! She’s not coming here to babysit! Besides, she doesn’t have a maternal bone in her body.” Lauren couldn’t even keep plants alive. Not that Julia worried she’d harm a child, but kids and Lauren didn’t mix well. Like oil and vinegar.

  “Aww come on, it’ll be a treat for her and us. Maybe she’ll grow one or two maternal bones chasing after Izzy.” Julia didn’t laugh at his poor attempt to lighten the mood. He lifted her chin, putting her nose to his. “I want to sleep with you in my arms through more than one night a week. Ask her. You know she’ll say yes.”

  “You’re impossible.” She giggled.

  “Yeah, I am.” He scooped her into his arms and kissed her softly. “What time will you be over today?”

  “I’m taking Heather to Tami’s for a haircut at noon, and maybe highlights if her broodingly handsome daddy says it’s okay.”

  “What about sexy daddy?”

  “Sexy, hot daddy who turns me to liquid with just one touch,” she teased in a seductive, breathy voice.

  “Hot damn, baby, you know how I like it when you get all Marilyn Monroe with me.”

  “I know.” She pressed her body against his. “What do you say? Highlights, yes or no?”

  “Yes. Wait. Tami’s open on a Sunday?”

  “Nope, this is a favor for Heather. She knows how busy we’ve been.”

  “Wow, that’s awfully nice of her.”

  “It is.” That was a small-town perk she had grown to appreciate more each day. The support of a unified community was something she had never experienced before, but now she embraced it wholeheartedly.

  “Before I go, kiss me as if it were the last time.”

  On command, Julia raised up on her tiptoes. She loved when he said those demanding words. Their mouths crashed together for a sizzling kiss. The arousing kind, wet and tongue-laced with roaming hands and moans of desire. The kind that always led them to bed.

  But it didn’t last long today before Luke dashed off. Not once did Julia stop their make out sessions. He cut her off, like all the other times, to get home to the kids. Luke had the restraint of one hundred men.

  If she had half the strength Luke did, she wouldn’t give one lick about Renee.

  four

  Mending Fences

  Rick Torres set his daughter Izzy on a little pink chair, slid it under a little pink table, and placed a little pink plate with white daisy flowers along the rim in front of her. Out of his back pocket, he pulled a spoon and placed it to the right of the plate.

  “Eat!” Izzy chirped in a high-pitched voice.

  “I’m getting it, I’m getting it.” He darted to the counter, grabbing a cup of applesauce and a bag of Goldfish. “Here’s your sauce and fishies.” He darted back to the counter for her sippy cup, then placed it to the left of the plate. “And here’s your juicy.”

  “Tanks.” She nodded, popping an orange fish-shaped cracker into her mouth.

  Orange had been her favorite color for the last year. At first, it had irritated him that a child would only want to eat orange foods. After all, didn’t they get bored eating the same thing every day? He’d found out quickly that his daughter didn’t tire easily. He’d also learned she had a healthy set of lungs, so he’d given in to her love of the color orange.

  But it wasn’t
only for food. Most of Izzy’s clothes were orange, and so was her pillowcase.

  So why not her table and chairs, or the plate with white daisies? Nobody had an answer for him.

  Renee would say, “Give her what she wants. It will be easier on you.”

  But his mother would say the opposite: “If you give her what she wants, it’s only going to make your life harder.”

  Who was he to believe? Izzy’s mom or his own mom? For a single dad, he hedged on the side of caution and sought the advice of Luke, who asked Julia, who said, “Give Izzy what she wants. No sense in distressing her when the little angel was separated from her mommy.”

  Julia made logical sense to Rick, and he followed her advice. It wasn’t about what made life easier for him, like Renee said, it was about helping Izzy through a difficult time. He could get behind that because he loved his daughter.

  The first time Rick met Julia had been during Memorial Day weekend, when he’d decided to take Izzy to see her siblings, Heather and Brice. He’d also wanted to begin the process of mending fences with Luke. Cowardly, he hoped Julia would be the buffer between them. If he was right, and he usually was, the lovestruck Luke would be open to moving forward. Rick wanted more than anything to pay penance for betraying Luke, and Julia was helping to make that happen.

  There wasn’t much in life Rick regretted, certainly not his daughter, who had been born from the affair. But severing his friendship with Luke was the biggest mistake he had ever made. And for that, he would always regret the night he’d given into Renee’s charms. And he had pledged to never do shots again when horny.

  With Izzy settled and happily having her afternoon snack, Rick took his phone from his back pocket and called Luke. He listened to it ring with an uneasy stomach.

  “Rick,” Luke greeted.

  “Hey, Luke. Any chance you’ve spoken to Renee in the last couple of days?”

  “Aww, shit. Man, this better not be a bad call.”

  “Not bad, exactly.” Luke sighed on the other end of the phone. “She’s been blowing up my phone with questions about you and Julia. She hasn’t called you?”

  “Oh, she calls. Every damn day. But she hasn’t asked about Julia and me since Memorial Day weekend, after I told her I was keeping the kids in Idaho through the summer. What kind of questions is she asking?”

  “When you guys are getting married. And if you’ve talked about having a baby. If Julia’s living with you and the kids. And, brace yourself, if she has any chance of getting you back.”

  “Fuck no! No chance at all.”

  “That’s what I told her. But you know her; she doesn’t give up so easily.”

  “No, she doesn’t. Why don’t you take her back?” Luke snorted.

  “Ha, ha, funny. Suddenly you’re Mr. Comedian. It must be love.”

  “You got that right. So, what time should we expect you Thursday?”

  “Noonish. I want to be at the resort in time for Izzy’s afternoon nap.”

  “Damn, man, you sound like Mr. Mom scheduling your travel arrangements around naptime. You’ve come a long way.”

  “I think I’ve found my groove with her. As sad as it is, she seems better without Renee. Dang, I feel bad saying that. But she’s less hyper now. And she doesn’t have daily meltdowns anymore. My little princess is one happy little girl.”

  “That’s good, man. Sounds like what she needed was stability.”

  “That’s exactly what she needed. I read the other day online that—”

  “Wait, what? You’re reading online and not looking at pictures,” Luke teased.

  “Joke all you want, but who has time for that? My porn days are over. I have Izzy to think about now. I want her to be proud of me.”

  There was silence on the other end. It happened often when they talked on the phone. Usually when Rick talked sensibly. Like the man he’d been before the affair. It would leave Luke silent, dumbstruck. Rick hoped that one day Luke would lower his guard enough so they could be friends again.

  “Luke? You there?”

  “Yeah, I’m here. I’m glad to hear you’re settling into fatherhood. Julia can’t wait to see Izzy. Heather too. You’ll have plenty of hands to help you with her.”

  “Thanks, but I should be good.”

  “Not while we’re jet-skiing.”

  “You bought jet skis?”

  “Nah, I rented them per Brice’s request.”

  “Sounds like fun. I’ll be needing those extra hands for the Little Miss.”

  “You got it. One more thing…”

  “Yeah?”

  “Julia’s best friend, Lauren, will be here. Keep your grubby hands off her.”

  “What?”

  “I don’t want any drama during the visit. And you create drama wherever you go.”

  “Why would you say that?” Rick asked defensively.

  “’Cause she’s the female version of you. The never-settling-down type, leaving a trail of broken hearts. Just mind your dick. Got it?”

  “Yeah, but you have nothing to worry about. I’m done with casual dating. Izzy deserves better than my usual hookups. I don’t want her to grow up without a positive lady figure in her life. Lord knows Renee isn’t it. And a female version of ‘the old me’ isn’t good enough.”

  “It’s good to hear you talking like this.” Luke paused for a few beats before he continued. “The kids are looking forward to the visit, and…so am I.”

  The air was sucked out of Rick’s lungs. Did Luke mean it? He was looking forward to the visit? Rick wanted to give Luke a manly bearhug, like the old days. But what if he didn’t mean it and was only being nice? Luke being nice just for the sake of it? There was no such thing. There was nobody more authentic than Luke. He didn’t say anything he didn’t mean.

  Relief washed over Rick.

  “Well, man, I gotta go. Remember, keep yourself in check,” Luke repeated.

  “Yeah, yeah. No problem there. See you in four days.” The line went dead, and for the first time in three years, Rick felt a smidge of hope that they were making real progress. He blinked back his emotions. He always had been the more sentimental of the two of them.

  “Da-da! More fishy!” Izzy called.

  “Yes, ma’am.” He saluted with a grin stretched across his face. “Good things are coming our way, baby. You’ll get to see your brother and sister in a few days, and I’ll get to see Luke, my brother. I’ll win him back. I’ll show him he can trust me.” He swallowed hard. “He can trust me. I’m a changed man.”

  “See Ulia?” Izzy craned her neck to see him.

  He laughed, cupping her chubby cheeks. Clumps of applesauce were smeared across her mouth, and she was the most beautiful angel he had ever seen with gorgeous smoky-blue eyes shining brightly up at him. “Yes, baby. You’ll see Julia.”

  Izzy clapped, screeching, “Yay, yay, yay!”

  Seeing her so happy about Julia was bittersweet for Rick. Izzy needed someone like Julia in her life, a positive female role model. Someone who would teach her how to be strong and independent, a force to be reckoned with. To be loyal and trustworthy, and to demand the same.

  None of which described Renee. She was the epitome of what Rick least desired for his daughter and her life.

  After serving more fishies, he went to the junk drawer in the kitchen and pulled out a real-estate listing to read through it for the hundredth time. Solid brick exterior, metal roof, and concrete floors throughout… It could be his if he took the leap buying the building.

  “Luke would flip if I bought this place.” He chuckled to himself. “It shouldn’t surprise him. I’ve only talked about opening a microbrewery since our first tour in Afghan.”

  He practically salivated imagining the IPAs and stouts he would create. But the house brew, a pilsner called The Brothers’ Plight, would be the pinnacle of his brand and the name of his brewery. He’d gotten it all figured out during a thirty-hour mission where he was stuck with Luke in a warehouse. It was that night, am
id their dirty talk and expected danger, that he’d pitched his entrepreneurial plan. His dream to own a microbrewery.

  Luke had listened to him for hours on end, never once teasing him about his aspirations, unlike his mom, who scoffed at him for wanting to make beer. “You need a real job,” she had preached to him time and time again, repeating, “No woman wants a husband who makes beer.”

  But Luke had encouraged Rick to study the craft, and when he’d enrolled in his first fermentation course, Luke had taken him out to celebrate, announcing to the establishment, “Future Brewmaster Rick Torres is in the house.”

  How could he let his education go to waste? At thirty-six and with a daughter to raise, he needed stability. Renee entered his mind, the mother of his child, and his heart ached. Not because he loved her, but for Izzy. Every child should be with their mother; he’d always believed that, and he wanted that for his own child. It was why he never went without his own protection, no matter how convincing the woman was while assuring him she was on birth control. Kids had not been part of his plans for the future, nor had marriage.

  For the life of him he didn’t know how Izzy had been conceived. He never had sex without a condom. But there she was sitting at her little pink table belting out “September” from her favorite movie, Trolls. “...memba…party…de ya…see-memba…de ya.” He never got tired of hearing her sing. These were the snippets of Izzy’s life Renee missed.

  Why had she chosen drugs over her kids?

  He refocused his thoughts. Idaho would be a good place to settle down. The small community had welcomed them back in May, and Izzy would be with her siblings. The only person he would have to convince was his mother, Isabel, which wouldn’t be hard, since she had wanted out of Alaska since arriving at his home a month after Izzy’s birth.

  Without second guessing himself, Rick dialed the realtor’s number to set up an appointment for Thursday before going to the resort. And then he would call Renee to let her know, as a courtesy. That wasn’t a call he was looking forward to making, but he wouldn’t stay idle.