Can't Fight This Feeling (Indigo Royal Resort Book 1)

by Claire Hastings

  “I guess it’s my turn to speak,” Miller said, standing up. “I don’t owe anyone money, although I must say I’m really happy to see this cash since I’d written that off as a loss quite some time ago! But, as Grayson mentioned, I am the hopeless romantic of the family. I’m also the middle child, so that probably explains a lot. Anyway, twenty-seven years ago when I got married, Vaughn looked at me and told me that he hoped that laughter would be the soundtrack to our marriage. While I certainly wasn’t married for quite the length of time I had planned, laughter was certainly a daily occurrence. It was the best thing anyone could have said to us that day, and I’m here today to return the blessing. May laughter be the soundtrack to your marriage.” He lifted his glass to toast the happy couple and everyone else followed suit.

  As people were finishing up their food and making their way over to Vaughn and Simone, Drea took the opportunity to slip out from the party. She wandered over to the pool, which was thankfully deserted since the bar that was usually open well into the night had been closed for the party. The towel cart had already been stocked for tomorrow’s guests, so Drea grabbed one and placed it on the pool deck to sit on while she let her legs hang into the cool water. The water felt good against her skin, and watching the ripples that came off the movement of her legs gave her a good distraction from the party.

  It had been such a long week, to the point where she couldn’t believe that with everything that happened, it had only been a week. She missed Kyle fiercely, and there was a part of her that felt so hollow without him here. How had it only been three days? All she wanted was to talk to him, to say she was sorry for accusing him of doing what her uncles had said. To tell him he was right, that she didn’t want to be anywhere but here, and to tell him that they were all open to the idea of her building the spa.

  Leona tossed a towel next to where Drea was sitting and it hit the pool deck with a plop. Squatting down to line herself up with the towel, she leaned a little too far forward and almost ended up in the pool. She probably would have if Drea hadn’t grabbed her arm just in time.

  “Hey you,” she said, once she was sure she was steady in her seat. “Hiding out?”

  “Just needed to get away.”

  “How ya feeling?” Leona asked, giving her a wary look.

  “Little less, ‘everyone can fuck off,’ but not quite optimistic about anything just yet,” she answered honestly. “I’m not quite ready to be done being mad at Uncle Vaughn.”

  “Well, hey, that’s a start. Want a distraction?”

  “Please!” she pleaded.

  “Lee is finally going to admit that she loves Cullen Cruz and that he was the second best lay she’s ever had,” Dalton said, appearing out of nowhere and crouching down in between the two girls.

  “Fuck you, the only feeling I have for that man is hate,” Leona responded.

  “Methinks the lady doth protest too much,” Dalton said, looking at Drea. Drea didn’t need to look over at Leona to know she was rolling her eyes.

  “Second best?” Drea asked.

  “Yes, after me of course,” Dalton said with a smirk as Leona rolled her eyes. He magically produced some cups and a bottle of rum. He handed each girl a cup and then filled each one with a little bit of the slightly amber liquid.

  Once they were taken care of, he settled himself in between them, poured himself some rum to match theirs and held up his cup in a toast. “To the losers who’ve lost you and to the lucky bastards yet to meet you.”

  “I’m not toasting to that,” Drea said.

  “You stole that from a movie!” Leona accused.

  “My sister’s favorite. I can recite the whole fucking thing.”

  “You have a sister?” Drea asked.

  “Yup, bitchy little thing still lives in Atlanta, acting like she owns the place.”

  “You’re from Atlanta?” Leona asked.

  “Then where’d you learn to sail?” Drea added in, looked at him perplexed, realizing in this moment just how little she really knew about Dalton.

  Dalton brushed off the question with a motion of his hand, as if he were pushing it away. “Enough about me. We’re focusing on Leona.”

  “But I already know all her secrets,” Drea said.

  “There’s not that many to know,” Leona added.

  “Oh, I think there is plenty to know. Like, just how excited are you about Cruz’s visit in a couple of months?”

  “I am not discussing Voldemort with you,” she said pointedly, refusing to give in to Dalton’s taunts. “So back to you, sir. Tell us about your sister.”

  “So, how ‘bout them Braves?” he asked, gulping down the rest of what was in his glass.

  “They’re baseball, right?” asked Drea.

  He looked over at her, a little surprised. “You surprise me sometimes, darlin’.”

  “We went to a game once,” she shrugged. “We had gone up to Boston because Uncle Vaughn insisted that we go see some of the Revolutionary War stuff. I think he must have just read a book on it or something. But while we were there, Uncle Gray insisted we go to Fenway to see the Red Sox play, so we did.”

  They sat there in silence for a while, sipping on the rum, Dalton refilling their cups every time someone was empty. They watched as the party continued, with everyone laughing and sharing stories. At one point, Grayson brought out a small speaker and coerced the newlyweds into a first dance. Drea could see their smiles from where she sat and a pang of jealousy overwhelmed her. She knew what they were feeling—she’d felt it just a week ago on the beach in San Juan. The feeling had overwhelmed her that evening, but in a good way. In a way she had never, ever wanted to end. More than anything she wished it were Kyle sitting next to her right now, feet dangling in the pool, chatting about what they might do differently at their own wedding.

  She knew she should be sitting here thinking about her family and what a happy occasion this was. It wasn’t that she wasn’t happy for them, she would just be happier if Kyle were here with her.

  Once the event was over, she could concentrate on putting all her numbers together for the spa. She had some basic numbers thrown together from her years of research of what it would cost to build out the space—the equipment they would need and the additional staff. But if the idea was about to become a reality, then she needed to put together some firm numbers to show her uncles.

  It occurred to her again that Kyle had been right, and that this was her chance to make that dream come true. As much as she wanted to hate him for what he’d done, she knew that if she was going to forgive her uncles, she would have to do the same for him too.

  “That’s what you do when you love someone, right? You forgive them?” Drea said, breaking the silence with her seemingly out-of-nowhere comment.

  “Are we still talking about your uncle or have we moved on to someone else?” Leona asked.

  “Both?” She paused. “I mean, he was right, this place is my life—I don’t want to be anywhere else. I just wish he was still here too.”

  “Here, have more rum,” Dalton answered, pouring more into her cup.

  “Just how much longer are you going to keep plying me with booze?” Drea asked.

  “Until you no longer wish he was here,” Dalton said proudly. “That’s my job as comedic relief.”

  Chapter Thirty-One

  Kyle sat at the kitchen table in his childhood home, spinning his phone around in circles in his hands. Everything in him wanted to text Drea, tell her all about what he discovered when he arrived home in Florida. Out of sheer habit he’d started at least a dozen times, before catching himself and deleting it. The logical part of his brain knew he needed to apologize, needed to tell her he knew he was an ass and that he regretted it more than he’d ever regretted anything. But he also knew that wasn’t enough. You can’t just say “I’m sorry” after telling someone “to have a good life.”

  He’d meant what he said. He did hope that she had the best, most wonderful life possible. One where s
he was happy and got everything she ever wanted. A life where the spa was a massive success and turned everything about the Indigo Royal on its head. More than anything else, though, he wished he could be a part of that fantastic life. But it was too late now. Maybe if he had stopped thinking about himself for a moment longer when she was in his room that day, they could have figured out a way to make it all work. She had been right on some level—Miller and Grayson had been perfectly accepting of their relationship. But as long as at least one of the uncles wasn’t, it didn’t matter how the other two felt.

  Taking a quick peek at the time on his phone, he realized they would be right in the middle of the wedding. He wondered what dress Drea had decided to wear. She had pulled out a bunch from her closet a few nights ago and had them lying on the back of the couch. The one that had caught his eye had been a charcoal, almost black, silky material, with thin little straps and what he thought was referred to as a sweetheart neckline, not that he was all that good with women's fashion. The skirt of the dress had angled outward so that Kyle imagined spinning her around on the dance floor and it poofing out just a bit. The thoughts had made him excited to take her to the wedding, even if it was under the guise of being her best friend.

  He wondered now if she had picked that dress or if she had gone with the black and white one that kind of draped itself, clinging nicely to her boobs. It occurred to him that he could text Dalton to check in, see how things were going, get a picture of him and the girls all dressed up. He’d sent a text to his buddy as he was getting on the plane coming back here asking him to watch out for Drea, make sure she was taken care of, so he knew that Dalton was right there with her tonight.

  The refrigerator came to life with a hum, and that inspired him to grab a beer. A pity party for one called for beer. Actually, what it really called for was bourbon, but there wasn’t any of that in the house. There hadn’t been any beer, either, until Kyle ran to the corner store this afternoon for the six-pack that was currently chilling in there. Seems his mom had taken to only drinking club soda these days. He was happy to see her taking her health so seriously, but in this moment, he wished she still kept a little something hidden in the house.

  Just as he was closing the fridge door, the overhead kitchen light came on, lighting up the entire room. His eyes burned for a moment as they adjusted to the light, but he recovered quickly, reaching for the bottle opener magnet on the side of the fridge.

  “Why are you sitting in the dark?” his mom asked, walking in and standing behind one of the chairs at the kitchen table.

  “Just didn’t seem worth the effort to turn on the light,” he retorted. He realized he sounded like an ass, but didn’t have the energy to even apologize.

  “What the hell is the matter with you, Kyle?”

  “Nothing.” He took a long pull on his beer, and leaned against the counter.

  “You don’t lie very well. You never have. Now sit,” she said, snapping her fingers and pointing to the chair he’d been in moments ago.

  He did as he was told and sat. She joined him at the table, pulling her chair in so close she almost looked squished in between it and the table.

  “You have been sulking around this house for three days, young man. This is after you show up out of nowhere, unannounced, with no real reason for being here. So, out with it,” she demanded.

  “I told you, I was worried. I got a text from Mrs. Maury that you weren’t answering your phone, so I came to make sure everything was okay.”

  “Without calling first? I raised you better than that.”

  “She said she hadn’t seen or heard from you in days. I was worried you were unconscious or something.”

  “Kyle, that woman is a nosy old bat. I’ve been avoiding her for months.”

  “Ever since you took up with him?” he asked accusingly.

  “I will admit that Brian might have been part of the motivation to finally do it. But I’d been meaning to do it for years.”

  “You could have mentioned that. You know, on those once-a-week phone calls we have. You could have mentioned you were trying to avoid her. Oh, and that you have a gentleman friend,” Kyle said, not trying to hide the snark in his voice.

  If his nerves hadn’t already been shot from being fired, fighting with Drea, and leaving St. Thomas so abruptly, walking in on his mother in flagrante with her new boyfriend on the couch would have certainly done it. The house had been quiet and dark when his Lyft had pulled up, causing Kyle to dig out his keys to let himself in. He had called out her name, but apparently not loud enough to pierce whatever bubble the two of them had been in. Flipping on the switch to turn on the living room light, he promptly turned it off again as soon as he registered what he was seeing—his mom, straddling a man on the couch, much like Drea had straddled him just a week ago. Her shirt was crumpled on the floor and from what Kyle could tell, her bra was damn close to joining it.

  “I had every intention of telling you about Brian. I promise. But it was also nice to have a little secret as well,” she said, with a mischievous little smile.

  “Who was I going to tell, Mom? I was over a thousand miles away!”

  “I know, baby. But I know you, and you would have found something to worry about. When you told me you and Andrea were starting something, I wanted you to be able to focus on that, not on me.”

  Kyle sighed. Focus on Drea, that was what got him into this trouble in the first place. Had he been better about his priorities, maybe he’d be twirling her around the dance floor, listening to her giggle right now, rather than sitting at the kitchen table with his mom.

  “What’s going on, Kyle? You said that you came to check on me. Okay, you checked. You can see I’m just fine. Why haven’t you gone back to the island?”

  He sucked in a deep breath. Now was as good a time as any to come clean with her. “I got fired from the Indigo Royal.”

  “What? What happened?”

  “Wednesday morning at breakfast, Drea found out she was an equal partner with her uncles in the resort.”

  “How exciting for her!”

  “Yes, very exciting for Drea. Well, in that moment of excitement, I kissed her.”

  “So? Isn’t that what a good boyfriend does?”

  “In front of her uncles.”

  “Oh.”

  “Yeah...and it was not well received. Well, Miller and Grayson didn’t care. Vaughn, however, lost his mind and fired me. Said that I was taking advantage of her, was only interested in her because of her money, and that I’d been leading her on for years.”

  “Oh my goodness. Does Drea believe any of that?”

  “No, thankfully. But, we had a fight after. She told her uncles to buy her out and we would go into business together, and I told her no, that I couldn’t ask her to do that, because I know the Indigo Royal is her life. It’s where she belongs.”

  “But you didn’t ask her, she offered.”

  “Now you sound like she does,” Kyle said, laughing at the irony.

  “Lady logic is a little bit different than man logic,” his mother told him. “So, where does all this leave you two?”

  “We’re over. I came back here. I can’t get another job on the island after being fired from there and I don’t have enough money to do my own thing yet. So, I kinda told her to have a good life, and I left.”

  “Kyle Joseph Egan! You did not tell that sweet young lady to have a good life!”

  “I did,” he admitted, hanging his head.

  “Oh Kyle. Every man has jackass moments, but that...that is a serious asshole move, kiddo.”

  “I am aware, Mom, thanks.”

  “It needed to be said,” she replied, shrugging. “So, now what?”

  “Not sure. I plan on staying here for a bit if that’s okay and then—”

  “No, that’s not okay,” she said quickly, cutting him off. “Let me rephrase the question. How are you going to fix this with Drea?”

  Kyle looked up, surprised. “Fix? Pretty sur
e there is no fixing this, Mom.”

  “See, this is your man logic coming through again. Do you love her?”

  “Mom...”

  “Do you love her?”

  “Yes. I love her. She’s...” he trailed off.

  “It? She’s it? She’s your lobster?” she asked him, linking her hands together via circles made from her forefinger and thumb like Phoebe did on Friends.

  “Yes, she’s my lobster,” he admitted.

  “Oh, baby.” She reached out and grabbed his hand. “Then why the hell are you still here?”

  “I told her to have a good life, remember?”

  “Baby, true love is a gift, and it doesn’t come along very often. If you really love her, if she’s your lobster, then you need to go fight for her. Grand gesture, groveling, whatever it takes.”

  “I’m not sure she’ll ever forgive me. I’m not sure I’ll ever forgive me.”

  “I bet she’ll surprise you. Love is a very powerful thing, Kyle,” she said. She took in a deep breath before starting again. “Kyle, I loved your father with every fiber of my being. I know you were cheated out of the chance of knowing just what an amazing man he was, but he was. He was my everything. I would have stopped the world and spun it backward for him. The only thing that kept me going after his death was you. And I see so, so much of him in you. You look just like him, but beyond that. Your fierce loyalty, your independent spirit, your overprotective nature—that’s all your father. He was my lobster and there isn’t anything I wouldn’t do to get him back.”

  “You mean Brian isn’t your lobster?” Kyle said sarcastically.

  “No. Brian is a great guy, you’ll see. But he’s not your dad. Just like I’m pretty sure I’m not his late wife. But, that is one of the things that binds us—we both understand the loss of a spouse.” Kyle nodded, taking a sip of his now warm beer.

  “Wait here,” she said, pushing away from the table and scurrying down the hallway. When she came back, she slid a small blue box toward him on the table. It looked like it had once been covered in velvet, but it was well-worn and showing its age.