Someone Else's Life

by Lacey Ann Carrigan

  Chapter Fifteen

  A week later, when they arrived at the center, Dr. Allende surprised Suella by receiving them in the lobby. She’d allowed her hair to grow longer, in an updated flip style, which made her appear even more glamorous than she had before. When she saw Natalie, her eyes brightened and she opened her arms to receive a hug from her. “There’s my little daredevil!” Dr. Allende said as she gave Natalie a quick embrace. “I heard you had quite a little skiing trip awhile back.”

  “I fell, but I’m okay now.”

  Dr. Allende gazed down at Natalie, studying her. “My word,” she said. “You’re getting to look so much like your mother. It’s uncanny.”

  Was she serious? Suella wondered. Of course she was going to look like her. The girl was cloned from one of her cells, for god’s sake. She took the doctor aside.

  “Dr. Allende, I’d like a word with you after you take Natalie back for her tests.”

  When they met quickly in one of the shellacked, gleaming offices, the doctor invited her to sit down. “Before you say anything,” the doctor said, when they’d both made themselves comfortable, “I know about the other news, also.”

  “But I never got a chance to tell you!”

  Calmly, the doctor continued. “We spoke with the nurse at the ski lodge. She was able to tell me, since you signed a treatment waiver.”

  “Did you tell her about Natalie’s….status?”

  “No,” she said, emphatically. “To do so would be to violate a doctor/parent confidence.”

  Suella had compiled and rehearsed all of her questions for Dr. Allende.

  At that moment, though, only one of them occurred to her. “Does Natalie’s early period mean she’s aging quickly?”

  For a split second, the doctor’s eyes widened before she continued. “No,’ she said, straightening herself in her chair. “It just means that onset of menses has occurred earlier than usual for Natalie.”

  Suella wondered if other things would occur “much earlier” for Natalie as well. She couldn’t hold back any longer. “For Natalie’s whole life she’s been having these extensive tests, and I accept that and all, but…”

  The doctor regarded her patiently while Suella struggled to organize her thoughts.

  “…well I just hope I’ll never regret bringing the poor girl into the world the way she was brought in.”

  Calmly, Dr. Allende said “Natalie is a beautiful, healthy girl. A success story.”

  The doctor was, by extension calling Suella beautiful also, since Natalie was the very image of her. Her husband’s stern words suddenly came to her. “Doctor, I have to tell you something that’s been preying on my mind. I’ve been told that the reason cloning isn’t more widespread is because it hasn’t really been perfected. The cells of the clone turn over too fast, causing it to age faster.”

  Dr. Allende patted Suella on the wrist and said “Natalie’s telomeres are normal.”

  “Her what? Her telomeres?”

  “A telomere is a part of the genetic code. In the past when animals were cloned, the telomeres broke down as the cells turned over and replaced themselves. They became shorter and shorter. That’s what caused the animals to age prematurely.”

  “And you’re telling me that Natalie’s tele-whats-its have all stayed the same?”

  “Yes.” As the doctor continued, she explained that it was the reason for the annual exhaustive tests. Several samples of telomeres had to be harvested and compared against each other. Natalie was also tested for nerve and electrolyte function. Throughout all nine years of her life, everything had come back normal.

  Suella sighed with relief. “Well, what more could one ask for?”

  The doctor excused herself to participate in Natalie’s testing while Suella retreated to the deserted lobby to pass the next hour and a half. She suddenly felt it odd that for the past five years she’d always been alone on the days for Natalie’s testing. She never saw Claudette, the other mother again. Did the executives of the center just not want parents to talk to each other? It appeared so.

  As with all the other times, Natalie eventually returned to the lobby with her same elated expression, happy to be done with another year’s testing. Time for chiliburgers.

  At home that night Nathan grilled salmon steaks on their patio. Since Natalie had gone out to play with some of the other neighborhood kids, her parents could talk freely as the steaks sputtered and smoked. Suella told Nathan all about Natalie’s normal telomeres. “She’s just doing damage control,” Nathan said, matter-of-factly, while sprinkling lemon on the fish. “It’s probably freaking all those doctors out about Nat getting her period already.”

  “I checked the web and discretely asked around, too,” Suella said. “Menses under age 10 is not all that uncommon, especially now. Some people blame in on pesticides and fertilizers.”

  “Just make sure she doesn’t get raped,” Nathan said. “She could get knocked up and we’d have us the youngest mother in history.”

  Suella punched him in the ribs, the way she always did whenever he told a bad joke.

  A few weeks later, something happened. Suella surfed through all of her accounts online, the way she always did in the mid-afternoon. Natalie returned home from school. Rather than bring her backpack to her room, she let it fall in the front foyer with a thud. She strode heavily toward the den. Suella felt her daughter’s presence in the room before she turned around to greet her. At first she was afraid to turn around, afraid of what expression she might find on her daughter’s face. When she finally steeled herself to look, she saw Natalie’s pained and drawn features.

  “Mom,” she started, in a soft, non-threatening voice. “Why didn’t you tell me I was a clone?”

  Suella shocked and stunned, immobile and mute. Was it really possible for a human mind to think as quickly as hers was doing? She could deny it, of course, and ask Natalie where she got her information. There was the possibility of a half-truth, that the egg had been fused and implanted but that she had carried her to term. She could even say that she adopted her as an infant and had no idea of the origin. But she loved Natalie. After a few more seconds of rapidfire soul searching, she decided that the direct, honest approach was best.

  “I should have told you years ago,” Suella said, starting to cry.

  She expected Natalie to start crying, too, but she simply stood in the doorway, expressionless.

  Suella knew she had to act. She rushed over to Natalie, cradling her in her arms, guiding her over to the daybed, setting her down softly atop her lap.

  “My darling, sweet Natalie. I love you so much. You’re so special to me.” She held her daughter tightly, rocking her back and forth. While she rested Natalie’s small head atop her shoulder, with the rays of late afternoon sun bathing them, she felt warm and peaceful, glad that everything was finally out in the open. So what if Natalie found out a little early? How did she find out?

  As Suella rocked her, she could feel the little girl’s chest hiccup and lift, shuddering against her. Natalie was now crying. Suella lifted her head off her shoulder and gently turned Natalie’s face toward her. Tears had started to trickle down both of Natalie’s soft cheeks. “What’s the matter, sweetheart?”

  Natalie’s breath was coming in small wisps. Suella stroked her back, soothing her. After a few moments, Natalie said “Mom, am I going to die?”

  Suella held her more tightly for a moment. “No, my sweet. Of course not. That’s why we take you to see Dr. Allende. She helps make sure that you stay healthy.”

  For the next moments, Suella held Natalie, who stayed still, like a statue. They sat there motionlessly. Suella fantasized that, in holding Natalie this way, she could bath her in her essence and shield her from the world. Natalie was a beautiful, healthy little girl, as anyone could see. Why should it make a difference that she was cloned? Apparently it made a diff
erence to someone, the nasty, mean someone who’d blabbed to her that she’d been a clone. How did she find out? Who could have told her? She couldn’t just ask her, point blank, because then Natalie would clam up.

  She thought of a way to broach the subject from the back end. “Did you discuss clones in school today, honey?”

  Natalie shook her head, dampening the shoulder fabric of Suella’s blouse.

  “Did someone else talk to you about clones? Someone not from the center?” She congratulated herself on her good sense. Putting the question that way would leave it in Natalie’s corner to tell her how and where she learned.

  “Someone called me,” Natalie said.

  It was the last answer Suella expected to hear. Natalie had only been connected to the grid for about a year. Nathan had stopped Suella from turning on the two-way earlier than that because “You’ll be calling her ass ten times a day.” But to receive a call that told her of her origin was strange, and scary. “Who was it?” Suella asked.

  “I don’t know.” She lifted her face away from Suella’s shoulder so that she could sit upright, on her lap. Her tears had dried, leaving glistening tracks along her cheekbones.

  Suella knew that she could check Natalie’s phone records and find out exactly who, along with the date and time. Still, she had one more question for Natalie: “Was it a man or a woman?”

  Natalie shrugged. “A man.” She started to shift around on her mother’s lap. “Can I go play now?”

  Suella nodded, helping Natalie lift herself up and over the chair. She waited until her daughter walked down the hall before she executed her next move. When she was sure that Natalie was safely out of earshot and happily occupied with her screens, Suella jumped on the line for Dr. Allende’s office. A sweet-sounding receptionist answered. Suella said “Could you just please tell Dr. Allende I have an emergency? This is Mrs. Worthy.”

  She knew it might be an hour or two before the doctor had time to reach her.

  In the meantime, she called Nathan’s private line. He’d said something earlier that day about riding out for deep sea fishing with his friends and when he answered, Suella heard a seagull caw and waves crest. “So she knows now,” he said when she told him. “I’m surprised she didn’t find out any earlier.”

  “Who do you think would have told her?”

  Nathan squawked from the other end of the line and Suella could imagine him holding the archaic handheld to his ear like a seashell. “How the fuck am I supposed to know? It was probably some disgruntled employee from that center. They’re all so weird over there.”

  “She said it was a man.”

  “Oh yeah,” Nathan said, chuckling. “Just trace it. Find the sorry ass. Kick him to the curb for it.”

  Before Suella even accessed the program, she knew that whoever did it probably put themselves in “Universal” before placing the call. When she tried to trace it by calling up Natalie’s records, she saw a bunch of zeroes on the screen. She sighed. Maybe Dr. Allende would know something.

  She punched in the number on voice and a sweet sounding young woman soon answered at the other end. “This is Mrs. Worthy. Get me Dr. Allende.”

  The office girl paused and made a few barely audible gasping sounds. “Well, I’m sorry ma’am, she’s in with a patient right now…”

  Suella brusquely interrupted with “Have her call me back. She knows the number.” She disconnected. For the next few minutes she tried to busy herself with housecleaning, knowing that it could be an hour or two before the doctor called back.

  She placed herself on two-channel availability and guided the robovacs around the den and the living room. Only minutes later the line blinked and she had to turn them both off in order to hear Dr. Allende. Normally Suella would have sat down to put herself through this type of a call, but this time she remained standing. Dr. Allende appeared on her beam screen, her hair tied back and her face scrubbed clean. Suella marveled over how the woman still managed to look good. They exchanged pleasant greetings.

  “What can I help you with today?” the doctor asked.

  Suella took a deep breath. “We have a problem.”

  The doctor’s eyes narrowed and she tilted her head slightly to one side.

  “Someone has called my daughter and told her that she’s a clone.”

  Dr. Allende nodded. “And she doesn’t already know?”

  “Of course not.”

  Her eyes widened and she let out a small sigh. Behind her, in the background, were jars filled with cotton swabs and a small chrome box. “Okay.” She bowed her head for a moment, apparently in thought. “She needed to know soon.”

  “I was going to tell her maybe next year, but that’s not the point. Do you realize what kind of damage this guy has done? My daughter is crying her eyes out right now and she thinks I’ve betrayed her!”

  Dr. Allende blinked. “She may be upset, but I’m sure she knows how much you love her.”

  “I think you have someone at the center causing trouble.”

  Without missing a beat, the doctor started shaking her head, frowning.

  “Not likely. We have strict agreements, everyone’s under contract. We’re tight knit.”

  “Has anyone been let go recently?”

  Dr. Allende’s eyes darted to the right for a split second. “No.” Her voice rose a few decibels before she took a deep breath. “The best thing you can do right now is be there for Natalie. She’s going to have lots of questions.”

  “Tell me about it.” Suella disconnected without officially closing the conversation, with Dr. Allende’s bewildered face dissolving into the ether. Slump-shouldered, Suella shuffled down the hallway to check on Natalie. The door had been left open, and Suella sneaked up to the jamb and stood behind it, looking in on her little girl. Natalie sat in her off-white, French Provincial desk, facing the far wall. There was no vanity there; if Natalie wanted to look at herself, she used a hand mirror. She blithely stretched screens open and spread them out before her eyes, unaware of her mother standing in the doorway. Though Suella’s vision had declined as she reached her latter forties, she could still read the headlines and some of the text on the screens. A picture of a sheep passed by. It was Dolly, the first successfully cloned animal.

  God help me, Suella thought, as she backed away from the jamb and walked down the hall toward the kitchen.