Bugged Out!

by Matthew Porter

  Not ten seconds later, the kicking stopped abruptly. There were unmistakable sounds of a struggle, followed by a few loud crashes. Jeremy let out a confused and angry “Wha—?”

  I was a little scared to look up, but curiosity got the best of me. When I did, I saw Nicklaus standing between me and the Hyena Gang.

  “What the hell is going on here?” he said angrily, glaring at the hyenas. “What did he do to you? Couldn’t have been bad enough for six of you to gang up on him!”

  Adam and Chris approached him, looking ready to throw a barrage of punches, but Jeremy stopped them. He walked up to Nick and got in his face. “So, you’re the new kid?” he said, grinning spitefully. “Let me give you some friendly advice—walk away. Dr. Stumpenstein and I were discussing some personal business.”

  Nicklaus gave him a smile that looked almost friendly. “Yeah? Why don’t you discuss that business with me instead?”

  Chris honed in to hit him for challenging his pack leader, but Nicklaus took a step back and tripped him. Adam tried to strike him as well, but Nicklaus grabbed him by the arm and flipped him onto the floor.

  Adam and Chris scrambled to their feet and stood behind Jeremy, who glared furiously at Nicklaus, his smile gone.

  A tense moment of silence passed, then Jeremy spoke. “Come on, guys, we’ve got better things to do.” He turned around and walked out of the classroom, taking the rest of the pack with him.

  Nicklaus reached his hand out to me. I cringed out of reflex, expecting a punch to the face, then realized that he was trying to help me up. I hesitantly took his hand and he pulled me to my feet.

  “Hey, man, you okay?” he asked.

  “I…I think so,” I answered nervously.

  “Hey, you wouldn’t happen to be James Stump, would ya?”

  I looked at him warily. “Yes. Why?”

  He let out a loud sigh and playfully punched my arm. “Good. I didn’t want to spend all day tracking you down. Can you do me a favor, man?”

  “Wh-what do you want?” I asked.

  “Well, I asked the bio teacher—Mrs. Snider, I think her name is?”

  I nodded slowly.

  He continued. “Yeah, Mrs. Snider. I asked her who the go-to guy was if I needed help with biology. I’ve never been the best at science stuff, and she said that you were, like, a mega-genius when it comes to bio. So, I gotta ask, will you help me out?”

  I stared at him for a moment. That was the first time anyone had ever asked for my help with schoolwork without threatening to wallop me.

  “What’s wrong? Do I have something on my face?” Nicklaus asked, rubbing the stubble on his cheek.

  “I s-suppose I can help you,” I answered nervously, but I didn’t want him to think I was anxious. So, I cleared my throat and straightened up. “But don’t expect me to do all the work. If you won’t give any effort, then the answer is no.”

  “Sounds fair enough,” he said with a nod. “It’s a deal. Can you do me another favor?” he asked as we walked out of the deserted classroom. “Can you tell me where English 1249 is? I’m kinda lost.”

  I nodded. “It’s two doors down from my next class. Follow me.”

  We walked down the quiet and empty hallway. I usually liked silence, but this silence was incredibly awkward, so I blurted out a question. “Why did you help me back there?”

  Nicklaus stopped and looked at me, his eyebrows furrowed. “Why wouldn’t I? I saw that you were in trouble, so I helped. Any decent person would’ve done the same thing.”

  We reached my class, so I pointed him in the direction of his.

  “Thanks, man. See ya later,” he said, then jogged to his class.

  ***

  When the bell rang for lunch, I quickly headed for the cafeteria.

  I always did my best to avoid the Hyena Gang, and I had an 82.6% success rate, not including the classes I had with them. This time I was particularly careful not to run into any of them in the hallway or cafeteria. What had happened after biology was rather unexpected, and I didn’t know how they would take it when they saw me. I still wasn’t quite sure how to take it myself.

  I waited for the Hyena Gang to push themselves through the line before I slid in, and I tried to keep out of their view as they went outside to eat the nutritional nightmares they called lunches. I got a salad with grilled chicken and avocado ranch and a bottle of unsweetened black tea.

  I sat at my usual table, which was far away from everyone else. I always used lunchtime to finish up any homework that was due for the next week or so; that way I would have time to read my medical journals on outbreaks and infection-control protocol when I got home.

  I opened my biology textbook and quickly skimmed through chapter twenty-eight again to make sure its vocabulary definitions were entirely correct before I started my essay that was due next Thursday. I had just finished reading over the section on natural killer cells when a sudden clang made me leap out of my chair.

  Nicklaus was sitting right across from me.

  His eyes widened and he held his hands up like he was surrendering. “Woah, sorry, man. I didn’t mean to scare you like that.”

  “Were you...wanting to study now?” I asked him. “It’s a bit too noisy to tutor in the cafeteria.”

  He chuckled. “Nah, I saw you sitting here and thought I’d join ya.”

  “Why?” I inquired.

  “Well, I was gonna ask you one more favor, if that’s cool?” he asked, dipping his fry in barbecue sauce before throwing it in his mouth.

  “What is it?” I asked after a moment’s hesitation.

  He shrugged. “I don’t know anybody here, except for my sis. So, I was wondering if I could hang with you?”

  It took me a while to process what he had just said. Did he just ask to be...my friend? If so, I had to let him know it was not a wise idea. “I’m not too popular around here, if you hadn’t noticed,” I said, looking down at my chair. “I’m the crazy Dr. Frankenstein, student edition. You won’t make a lot of friends by being seen with me.”

  He gave a dismissive flick of his wrist. “Psh, I don’t care what other people think. I mean, I already know I’m awesome. I can hang out with whoever I want, and you seem like a nice dude. A little different maybe, but I’ll take my chances,” he said as he tossed another fry in his mouth. When I didn’t answer, he looked up at me, eyebrows drawn in. “Aren’t you gonna sit down?”

  I hesitated, but decided to get back in my seat. The second I did, he stood up. I knew this was a trick…

  “Crap!” he said dramatically. “My burger doesn’t have enough ketchup... I’ll be right back.” He ran to the concession area.

  “Hey, James,” said a girl’s voice.

  Kelly slid into the seat next to me. “Sorry I’m late. I had to talk to Mr. Owens after class,” she said, unzipping her lunch bag. She glanced over at Nicklaus’s lunch tray. “Whose lunch is that?”

  “Nicklaus’s,” I answered.

  She raised her eyebrow. “Nicklaus who?”

  As if summoned, Nicklaus came sprinting back to the lunch table and plopped into his seat. “They’re out of ketchup!” he said, as if it would be the year’s biggest scandal.

  Kelly looked up at him and blinked. “O-oh, the new guy,” she said, her voice going up an octave.

  Nicklaus’s eyes widened as he looked at Kelly. “Hi there, how’s it goin’?”

  She stared at him for another moment, a little flustered. She was probably just as shocked as I was that someone else had decided to sit with me. “Hi, Nicklaus...I’m Kelly.”

  “Hey, Kelly. And call me Nick,” he said. “So, are you James’s girlfriend or somethin’?”

  “No,” she said with a chortle. “He’s like my brother.”

  Nick nodded. “Gotcha. So, Kelly—” He stopped talking and looked across the lunchroom. “Abbs!” he yelled, waving his hands wildly. “Come sit over here!”

  Nick’s sister, Abigail, came walking over to our table with her lunch tray and
sat next to Kelly. “Don’t be so loud all the time, Nick...jeez,” she said, sounding exasperated.

  Nick leaned back in his chair. “I wasn’t that loud.”

  Abigail sighed. “No, you’re right. I’m sure they couldn’t hear you upstairs.”

  Kelly giggled. Abigail smiled at her. “Hi, I’m Kelly.”

  “Abby. I see you’ve met my twin brother,” she said, rolling her eyes. “Thank God we’re not identical, or I’d have to walk around looking like that.” She looked at Nick and wrinkled her nose.

  Nick chuckled. “You wish you were this good-lookin’.”

  I had no idea what was going on, so I returned to studying.

  “Woah, James,” said Nick. I glanced up at him, and he looked at me with wide eyes. “You’re studying at lunch?”

  What did he think I was doing before he sat down?

  “Some people, like, actually study, Nick,” said Abby, picking up her turkey wrap.

  He looked at her, a little disgruntled. “I wasn’t sayin’ it was a bad thing, but lunch is supposed to be a time to unwind and chill.”

  Abby rolled her eyes. “So is every class you’ve ever been in,” she said, sounding annoyed.

  Kelly giggled. “You can totally tell you two are related.”

  “Of course you can,” I said, notating the differences between T-cells and B-cells in my essay outline. “They share several genetic markers, including—”

  Kelly sighed. “That’s not what I meant…”

  I looked up at her. “How else can you tell someone is related? Well, there are DNA tests and—”

  Kelly rolled her eyes. “I can’t with you sometimes.”

  As the four of us conversed, something caught my eye. Someone was peering at us from behind a pillar near the physical education hallway. I assumed at first that it was Jeremy, or another hyena. However, when I got a better look, what I saw made me knock my biology textbook to the floor.

  To say this woman was dressed strangely would be an understatement. I was no fashion expert, but wearing a trench coat, scarf, and sunglasses indoors on a tropical island was pretty odd. She looked as if she were in a 1940s spy movie. Her looks made me feel uneasy, but what made me feel downright unnerved was that nobody seemed to notice her at all except for me. A few students making their way to the main stairwell from the physical education hallway walked right past her, not bothering to give her so much as a glance.

  The woman seemed to focus all her attention toward our table. Her sunglasses slid down her nose, and her eyes stared into mine.

  “James?” I heard Kelly say, but she sounded far away. “James?” she said again, but I was too transfixed on the woman. However, the third “James” came with a slap on the shoulder, which caused me to look at Kelly with annoyance. “Why are you staring into space?” she asked.

  “I wasn’t,” I told her, rubbing my shoulder. “There’s this—” But when I looked back, the woman was gone. I glanced all around the lunchroom and the hallway for any sign of her. She couldn’t have gone far.

  Nick, Abby and Kelly all looked around as well, each wearing a perplexed expression.

  “What are we looking for?” asked Abby.

  “I… Nothing, I suppose,” I said. I couldn’t have just imagined that, right? I thought as I picked up the textbook I’d knocked on the floor. As soon as I sat back up, the bell rang.

  “Hey, what are you guys doing after school today?” Nick asked as he swung his bookbag over his shoulders.

  “Nothing in particular,” I said, wondering why he would ask.

  “Same here,” Kelly answered.

  “Do you guys want to hang out with me and Abbs after school?” he asked. “We haven’t had enough time to see the sights and stuff.”

  Anxiety threatened to swell up inside me. “Actually, I do have a lot of homework and—”

  “We’ll gladly show you around town,” Kelly interrupted, elbowing me in the side.

  “Great,” said Nick, trying to hand me his smartphone.

  “I, uh, I can’t. I don’t have a car,” I said hastily, staring at the phone as though it was about to blow up.

  “I can pick you up,” he said. “It’s no problem.”

  I looked at him, then at Abby, then at the floor. “I—I—”

  “He’s just being difficult,” Kelly said, taking the phone. “He would love to hang out.” She typed our numbers in and handed his phone back.

  “Cool. I’ll text you guys later,” said Nick. “Right now Abbs and I have to go sort out some last-minute scheduling problems.”

  As he and Abby left for the student services office, Kelly looked at me and frowned. “If you really want to be friends with someone, don’t tell them you aren’t doing anything after school and then make up an excuse after they invite you to do something,” she said sternly.

  “I apologize,” I answered. “I don’t know what to do in these situations. I panicked.”

  “Clearly,” she said, her frown curling up into a smile. “Oh, what would you do without me, James?” She sighed. “But it’s pretty great that you’ve made some new friends.”

  “I suppose,” I said with a little unease.

  “Don’t freak out about it,” she said. “What’s the worst that can happen?”

  I thought about that for a moment. “I could embarrass myself and they won’t want to be my friends anymore. Or, they could be ax murderers. You never know.”

  “I’ll be there to make sure you don’t embarrass yourself,” she said. “And I’m pretty sure they’re not ax murderers. Call it a hunch. Come on, enjoy the fact that you made some friends.”

  “I’ll try,” I said, trying to sound enthusiastic. It’s not like I wasn’t excited about the idea, but I was so anxious about messing it all up.

  “It’ll be okay. Just try to relax,” she said calmly. “I’ve got to go to ethics now. I’ll see you eighth period.” She grabbed her bag and headed to the stairway.

  That was easy for her to say. She was friends with almost everybody.

  I picked my bag up and headed to my next class, psychology, which I did not particularly enjoy. Although psychology certainly had its benefits to society, it was way too subjective to be considered a science in my opinion.

  I sat in class, trying to stay awake. Mr. Schwindler’s monotone voice and the psychobabble he was spouting—I mean, teaching—made me want to sleep. About halfway through class, my phone vibrated, and I almost jumped out of my chair. I never got texts during school, or hardly ever. I checked my phone to see if it was an emergency at home or something.

  Sup, James? It’s Nick!

  I stared at the screen for a moment, not believing what I was seeing. Texting in the middle of class? Is this Nick character some kind of anarchist? I thought as Mr. Schwindler continued to ramble on about how social norms affected our way of thinking. I put my phone back in my pocket and tried to stay awake through class.

  After psychology, I had anatomy and physiology, which was my second favorite subject, and after that was the class I dreaded even more than psychology: physical education. The biggest reason I hated it, aside from the physical-activity part, was that a few members of the Hyena Gang were in the same class. When we played contact sports, they would tackle me even if I didn’t have the ball, or trip me while I was running, and they always did it when Mr. Isely wasn’t looking. That day, however, they didn’t do anything of the sort. Perhaps they were too shell-shocked from Nick interrupting my beating.

  After PE I had history. I was walking down the hallway to class when I heard someone yell my name across the hall.

  “James, wait up!” I turned around and saw Nick sprinting down the hall with Abby running behind him. He stopped just in time to avoid knocking me over. “Do you know where History 1250 is?”

  “Yes, I’m heading there now,” I answered.

  “Sweet!” he said excitedly. “Abbs and I are in that class too.”

  “Please excuse my brother,” said Abby apologetical
ly. “He chugged two energy drinks while we were sorting our schedules out. I mean, he’s like this anyway, but now he’s supercharged.”

  The three of us walked into class, where Kelly was sitting at the front. I sat next to her, Nick sat right behind me and Abby sat behind Kelly.

  Nick tapped my shoulder with his pencil. “I messaged you a while ago. Why didn’t you text back?”

  I turned around. “I was in class. It’s against school policy to text while class is in session.”

  He gave me a blank stare. “What’s your point?”

  I looked at him, shocked and appalled. “I couldn’t text back. I didn’t want to get in trouble.”

  He held his hands up. “Sorry, man. Just thought I’d be friendly.”

  Kelly looked back at Nick. “Don’t mind James. He means well, but he’s a little socially challenged.”

  “Rules were made for a reason,” I said vehemently.

  Nick handed me a piece of paper that he ripped from his notebook. “The reason I texted you was to get your address. We’re still hanging out tonight, right?”

  Kelly jabbed me in the side. “Ouch!” I yelped. “Yes, we are hanging out tonight. And I... apologize for snapping at you about the text. I’ve never gotten a text from a friend during class. As it is, Kelly’s truly the only friend I have.”

  Nick slapped my shoulder. “Well, you can’t say that anymore, James. You’ve got two more friends right here.”

  Kelly and I wrote our addresses down and gave the paper back to him. I really hoped he wasn’t an ax murderer now that he had my address.

  Fifteen minutes into the lecture, Nick tapped on my shoulder again and whispered, “I’m gonna pick you up first. The GPS says your house is closer to ours.”

  I whispered back to him, “You were looking it up while we’re in class? What’s wrong with you?”

  “Sorry,” he said, but I wasn’t sure he meant it. “Just checking the ETA.”

  I sighed. This friendship thing was going to be interesting. I was really going to have to teach him proper classroom etiquette.